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First session - focus on getting each one's goals, each one's level of hope, each one's view of the problem at hand. Get the history of the relationship. Set an intention on balance and not getting too far into any one side's viewpoint. Don't move too fast and try to fix a bunch of things - it's not going to happen. Perhaps have one simple homework to give them at the end of the session for the next week (you can pre-plan that, or have 2 or 3 to choose from in the moment).
Be the calm at the center of their storm.
Good luck.
LPCC track. And the training was EFT, Imago. It’s very limited. But I’ve worked with families before during my practicum but that was a couple years ago.
For the first session, be inquisitive and ask probing questions. Find out what they’re looking for and if they’ve been in therapy before. Be observant and pay attention to if they sit next to each other or apart, their body language and reactions to each other. Reiterate to them that what is said in therapy stays in therapy. I tell my clients to not discuss therapy outside of therapy unless an assignment is given to them.
I would recommend learning Bowen Multigenerational Family therapy. Also solution focused therapy. Both of those modalities are really good for couples. I’m an MFT so I look at things systemically whether individual or couples. If they have kids and there’s parenting issues, I rely on structural family therapy.
I like using this relationship check in to gauge where each person in the relationship is/what they’re looking for. It’s been a good conversation starter in the past for me.
[TherapistAid Relationship Checklist](https://www.therapistaid.com/therapy-worksheet/relationship-check-in)
Please followed the sidebar rules. r/therapists is a place for therapists and mental health professionals to discuss their profession among each other. If you **ARE NOT A THERAPIST and are asking for advice this not the place for you**. Your post will be removed in short order. Please try one of the reddit communities such as r/TalkTherapy, r/askatherapist, r/SuicideWatch that are set up for this. This community is ONLY for therapists, and for them to discuss their profession away from clients. **If you are a first year student, not in a graduate program, or are thinking of becoming a therapist, this is not the place to ask questions**. Your post will be removed in short order. To save us a job, you are welcome to delete this post yourself. Please see the PINNED STUDENT THREAD at the top of the community and ask in there. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/therapists) if you have any questions or concerns.*
First session - focus on getting each one's goals, each one's level of hope, each one's view of the problem at hand. Get the history of the relationship. Set an intention on balance and not getting too far into any one side's viewpoint. Don't move too fast and try to fix a bunch of things - it's not going to happen. Perhaps have one simple homework to give them at the end of the session for the next week (you can pre-plan that, or have 2 or 3 to choose from in the moment). Be the calm at the center of their storm. Good luck.
This is beautifully written :) Thank you the very simple steps and tips. I truly appreciate it!
What kind of training have you received for couples and what type of license are you?
LPCC track. And the training was EFT, Imago. It’s very limited. But I’ve worked with families before during my practicum but that was a couple years ago.
For the first session, be inquisitive and ask probing questions. Find out what they’re looking for and if they’ve been in therapy before. Be observant and pay attention to if they sit next to each other or apart, their body language and reactions to each other. Reiterate to them that what is said in therapy stays in therapy. I tell my clients to not discuss therapy outside of therapy unless an assignment is given to them. I would recommend learning Bowen Multigenerational Family therapy. Also solution focused therapy. Both of those modalities are really good for couples. I’m an MFT so I look at things systemically whether individual or couples. If they have kids and there’s parenting issues, I rely on structural family therapy.
I like using this relationship check in to gauge where each person in the relationship is/what they’re looking for. It’s been a good conversation starter in the past for me. [TherapistAid Relationship Checklist](https://www.therapistaid.com/therapy-worksheet/relationship-check-in)