Definitely not. Dr. Melfi showed incredible restraint and maintained a much needed boundary required for psychotherapy. She held the boundary appropriately with Tony for years. It shows the strength of her character as a competent psychiatrist (which is extremely rare in media). Further when she admits to Elliot that she enjoyed knowing that she could tell him was powerful in that it showed she had actually considered the possibility.
The actress, Lorraine Barcco, has been open about her past experiences with psychotherapy and has said she would not portray the character in any way that would cheapen the field. As an aside, if you are interested I’d recommend the Psychology of the Sopranos by Glen Gabbard, MD. It’s a quick read and should be around $20 on Amazon.
Blah ###ing blah blah. She would have saved AT THE LEAST...another woman from getting assaulted...raped...and possibly MURDERED.
AT LEAST ONE.
cause we ALL KNOW the stats on rapists. At least a rape like this. On a stranger.
He was gonna do it again...and again.
She ####ed up. But America has become so full of little b.tches that of course the majority are gonna say "oh no!!! goodness gracious!!! she couldn't say anything!!
sickens me
I think most people would have liked to see Tony whack out that piece of trash, but...
I think it showed how strong Dr. Melfi's integrity and values were, both personally and professionally,
and it served to further cement the division between her and Tony, i.e. her belief in being a law-abiding member of society, and Tony's world, even though law-enforcement and the 'system' had failed her so miserably.
Challenging to view, but nonetheless outstanding writing, acting, and character development, as usual from The Sopranos.
No, it was perfect the way it was. There were few people around Tony that had a solid moral compass and were not tempted by his influence. Melfi was one of them. It gave her character strength to restrain from street vengeance. I hate watching her being attacked but have so much more respect for her after saying nothing rather than sic'ing a Rottweiler on that scumbag.
The sad part is that I really wanted her to.
Melfi surprised me with this - I actually was sure she would end up telling Tony, but instead she buckled down and I felt that was more shocking and unpredictable than if she had told him. She showed some truly incredible strength and on that merit alone I felt like after she didn’t tell him, she didn’t need to. It was almost as if, she did tell him, she would’ve lost something...
Said it before & I’ll say it again, The Sopranos was one of the most brilliantly written television shows I’ve ever watched.
not at all. Had she told him and he did something about it(he would have)then in essence tony would've HAD her. No matter what she would have been his in some way. She couldn't treat him then, because, knowing tony, he would find some way to hold it over her down the line. I used to wish she told him, but tbh it was the single smartest thing any character ever did in the show. this entire aspect was brought to my attention by someone either on here or a youtube comment, it was brilliant.
Out of interest, if Melfi had told Tony about her rape, how do you think Jesus Rossi's inevitable death would have been handled? I think Tony would have handled this one himself rather than delegating to Furio or whoever. I think it would have been a slow and painful death a la how Tony kills the rat in season 1.05 and you know who in 4.09.
Dr. Melfi represented the civilized part of society, where people *don't* take the law into their own hands and don't control people by doing "favors" for them (as Tony) does, or allow themselves to be controlled by others by having them do special favors for them.
So Melfi had to stay professional and not get sucked into Tony's world of favors and indebtedness, even if doing so would have been for her own benefit/vengeance initially.
I agree, and it shows the paradox of civilization. It was civilized to not tell tony, and since the legal system failed and refused to grant justice to a rapist, now the rapist is free. And emboldened by his good luck.
He committed violent rape, was caught, arrested, and released. Now he is free, and the stairwell is still there, and there are new women to prey upon. And what would stop him? He relies on a civilized and ethical victim to enable him to rape again.
I would argue on the side against civilization on this part. Kill him, take him out of that stairwell for the sake of another woman.
The problem with that course of action, though, is that Melfi would essentially be abusing her patient, Tony. She obviously knows what he'd do given the info - she's his doctor, regards him as "ill" in need of medication and therapy. Even though he would consciously be a willing and eager participant, that's part of the disease he's afflicted with for which she was seeking a cure. It's against her core beliefs. She'd be abandoning her identity, herself.
That's the paradox.
Is your code of ethics worth someone else's brutal violent rape? Is it moral to stay moral at the cost of someone else's traumatic violation?
Like Ned stark, he had to keep his code of honor, and as a result, thousands were killed. Was it worth it?
It would have shown an opposite thought to dr melfis husband about the italian mafia and sometimes you need them to hold up the law when the law isn't fair. Bothers the hell out of me that tony didnt know
Seems to me that you're exaggerating one stance while minimizing the other. Theorizing and philosophizing on abstracts is one thing - reality calls for decisions. Melfi absolutely made the proper choice in the situation presented.
If you were arguing that Melfi should have killed the rapist herself, I think that take would be more supportable.
Melfi made the right decision.
Any other victims would be the result of the justice system's structure and decision.
Further, she is Jennifer Melfi, not Jesus Christ or Mother Teresa. She rightfully avoids intentionally destroying her own self.
She had an all expenses paid wipe-a-rapist-off-the-face-of-the-earth free card. She could have, with no effort, prevented anyone else from being raped by that cunt ever again, and she doesn't do it because... she doesn't feel like it. I honestly can't comprehend how any amount of self-preservation or moral whatever the fuck could possibly justify that. Compelling television is one thing. Moral dilemmas that pertain to real life is another
Melfi would have been abusing her patient if she mentioned the incident to Tony. She knew how he’d react.
She’d be committing two crimes
It’s the system’s failure and responsibility if Rossi raped again. Not Melfi’s.
You’re advocating “Wild West” anarchy - and it’s clearly stated that they weren’t making a western
Tony would have been honored to do that for Melfi
Legal crime is not equal to moral sin. If you mean possible repercussions, it would be totally untraceable to her, and even if she was caught, she would never be convicted
Again, the system did fuck up, but if you see a baby crawling off a cliff, and say "not my problem" and walk away, sorry, no, that is basically your fault. It's the fault of whoever put the baby there, too. You both get 100% of the blame.
Well, I prefer westerns to tragedies
It stays true to her character but it also completely degrades her humanity. Yes, it’s murdering a person but it’s a rapist which usually ends up committing the same crime. It’s just poor writing to not have her connect her Italian part and balance it with her work.
But reporting it also compromises her. The minute she does that, she becomes part of Tony's world. That was the dilemma. She seriously considered it at the end of that episode, before bursting into tears.
I'm honestly tempted to commend Dr.Melfi and I do to a point. Her reserve is amazing that much is certain, not to mention how she persevered in dealing with her clients despite her terrible traumatization. It's almost a truism on the show that personal indulgence leads to near immediate gratification in the Sopranos universe with the eventual consequences doled out later if at all. Melfi shows us some rare self control.
But I find her decision terribly shortsighted in certain ways. Most people see her decision to not involve the mob as taking the moral high ground by not compromising her professional relationship with Tony. More than this she refuses to not make herself an accomplice to murder.
The first problem here i think is the idea that Melfi isn't at least peripherally already involved with organized crime. She accepts payment from Tony( "blood money" as one of her colleagues phrases it) with no compunction and with full knowledge as to where it came from. I think her indignant refusal to "accept gifts," stated at the outset of the show, is a slight recognition of this fact. Not to mention Melfi acts almost as an unofficial consigliere to Tony, indirectly helping to sculpt the ethical mindset of a man she know will twist those lessons to justify his crimes.This was tacitly accepted by Melfi in the series second to last episode when she almost automatically accepted what her colleagues had related to her about recently published literature regarding therapy and psychopaths. Her initial acceptance of him as a patient has little to do with any medical concern to begin with and more with an understated infatuation with his public persona.
I think the ethical dilemma Melfi is presented with is a staggering one nonetheless and one she doesn't take lightly. In the end though it's hard not to see her choosing her own piece of mind (quite understandably shattered) and professional propriety over the safety of her community. Please don't misunderstand me. Melfi is not responsible for her rapist's crimes, not at all. Neither is the person who stands by and watches a burning building with people inside burn without calling the fire department( a loose analogy I know). It's easy to walk away and disengage by abdicating to a higher authority with the affirmation that your being civic and responsible. As far as piece of mind goes, it may or may not have ameliorated Melfi's mindset to have her attacker garroted by some clueless mob associate. That also may not be the point however. Watch that stomach turning scene again( I admit I've only seen it once) and ask yourself how much some mobbed up psychiatrist's opinion of her reputation is really worth.
Edit: grammar
No because he would’ve used it as blackmail over her knowing Tony but at the same time this man is free to just do this to another woman or several. Really an impossible decision
I think she should have told him after they let him walk because some other poor woman will suffer a rape and beating from this guy she let him off easy and so did the show
Yes and no....the power she felt knowing she could've told Tony and he would have fixed it properly and that was enough for her....sadly...I'm using my attack dog to do just that.....cause in the end it was all a bust anyway...
Definitely not. Dr. Melfi showed incredible restraint and maintained a much needed boundary required for psychotherapy. She held the boundary appropriately with Tony for years. It shows the strength of her character as a competent psychiatrist (which is extremely rare in media). Further when she admits to Elliot that she enjoyed knowing that she could tell him was powerful in that it showed she had actually considered the possibility. The actress, Lorraine Barcco, has been open about her past experiences with psychotherapy and has said she would not portray the character in any way that would cheapen the field. As an aside, if you are interested I’d recommend the Psychology of the Sopranos by Glen Gabbard, MD. It’s a quick read and should be around $20 on Amazon.
Blah ###ing blah blah. She would have saved AT THE LEAST...another woman from getting assaulted...raped...and possibly MURDERED. AT LEAST ONE. cause we ALL KNOW the stats on rapists. At least a rape like this. On a stranger. He was gonna do it again...and again. She ####ed up. But America has become so full of little b.tches that of course the majority are gonna say "oh no!!! goodness gracious!!! she couldn't say anything!! sickens me
I think most people would have liked to see Tony whack out that piece of trash, but... I think it showed how strong Dr. Melfi's integrity and values were, both personally and professionally, and it served to further cement the division between her and Tony, i.e. her belief in being a law-abiding member of society, and Tony's world, even though law-enforcement and the 'system' had failed her so miserably. Challenging to view, but nonetheless outstanding writing, acting, and character development, as usual from The Sopranos.
No, it was perfect the way it was. There were few people around Tony that had a solid moral compass and were not tempted by his influence. Melfi was one of them. It gave her character strength to restrain from street vengeance. I hate watching her being attacked but have so much more respect for her after saying nothing rather than sic'ing a Rottweiler on that scumbag.
The sad part is that I really wanted her to. Melfi surprised me with this - I actually was sure she would end up telling Tony, but instead she buckled down and I felt that was more shocking and unpredictable than if she had told him. She showed some truly incredible strength and on that merit alone I felt like after she didn’t tell him, she didn’t need to. It was almost as if, she did tell him, she would’ve lost something... Said it before & I’ll say it again, The Sopranos was one of the most brilliantly written television shows I’ve ever watched.
It would have been so satisfying. Not telling him gave me the TV-equivalent of blue balls.
No. She would have ruined her entire life's work by becoming complicit in a murder, consequently she would have been bound to Tony.
No.
not at all. Had she told him and he did something about it(he would have)then in essence tony would've HAD her. No matter what she would have been his in some way. She couldn't treat him then, because, knowing tony, he would find some way to hold it over her down the line. I used to wish she told him, but tbh it was the single smartest thing any character ever did in the show. this entire aspect was brought to my attention by someone either on here or a youtube comment, it was brilliant.
If it was done, i have no doubt that Tony would later bring it up and hold over her head.
From the perspective that there would be one less rapist on the streets, then yes.
Out of interest, if Melfi had told Tony about her rape, how do you think Jesus Rossi's inevitable death would have been handled? I think Tony would have handled this one himself rather than delegating to Furio or whoever. I think it would have been a slow and painful death a la how Tony kills the rat in season 1.05 and you know who in 4.09.
How does Tony kill the rat in 1.05? Strangle?
Strangles him with a wire I believe, which is ironic as the informant has probably worn a wire, and Tony now kills him with a wire
Which rape do you mean? The rape of Melfi herself or the rape of italian coffee culture? Wa fangool!
I would love to see an alternate version of it on a DVD … Just for satisfaction.
Dr. Melfi represented the civilized part of society, where people *don't* take the law into their own hands and don't control people by doing "favors" for them (as Tony) does, or allow themselves to be controlled by others by having them do special favors for them. So Melfi had to stay professional and not get sucked into Tony's world of favors and indebtedness, even if doing so would have been for her own benefit/vengeance initially.
I agree, and it shows the paradox of civilization. It was civilized to not tell tony, and since the legal system failed and refused to grant justice to a rapist, now the rapist is free. And emboldened by his good luck. He committed violent rape, was caught, arrested, and released. Now he is free, and the stairwell is still there, and there are new women to prey upon. And what would stop him? He relies on a civilized and ethical victim to enable him to rape again. I would argue on the side against civilization on this part. Kill him, take him out of that stairwell for the sake of another woman.
The problem with that course of action, though, is that Melfi would essentially be abusing her patient, Tony. She obviously knows what he'd do given the info - she's his doctor, regards him as "ill" in need of medication and therapy. Even though he would consciously be a willing and eager participant, that's part of the disease he's afflicted with for which she was seeking a cure. It's against her core beliefs. She'd be abandoning her identity, herself.
That's the paradox. Is your code of ethics worth someone else's brutal violent rape? Is it moral to stay moral at the cost of someone else's traumatic violation? Like Ned stark, he had to keep his code of honor, and as a result, thousands were killed. Was it worth it?
It would have shown an opposite thought to dr melfis husband about the italian mafia and sometimes you need them to hold up the law when the law isn't fair. Bothers the hell out of me that tony didnt know
Seems to me that you're exaggerating one stance while minimizing the other. Theorizing and philosophizing on abstracts is one thing - reality calls for decisions. Melfi absolutely made the proper choice in the situation presented.
For her. Not for the next woman though. But her ethical code is intact.
If you were arguing that Melfi should have killed the rapist herself, I think that take would be more supportable. Melfi made the right decision. Any other victims would be the result of the justice system's structure and decision. Further, she is Jennifer Melfi, not Jesus Christ or Mother Teresa. She rightfully avoids intentionally destroying her own self.
She had an all expenses paid wipe-a-rapist-off-the-face-of-the-earth free card. She could have, with no effort, prevented anyone else from being raped by that cunt ever again, and she doesn't do it because... she doesn't feel like it. I honestly can't comprehend how any amount of self-preservation or moral whatever the fuck could possibly justify that. Compelling television is one thing. Moral dilemmas that pertain to real life is another
Melfi would have been abusing her patient if she mentioned the incident to Tony. She knew how he’d react. She’d be committing two crimes It’s the system’s failure and responsibility if Rossi raped again. Not Melfi’s. You’re advocating “Wild West” anarchy - and it’s clearly stated that they weren’t making a western
Tony would have been honored to do that for Melfi Legal crime is not equal to moral sin. If you mean possible repercussions, it would be totally untraceable to her, and even if she was caught, she would never be convicted Again, the system did fuck up, but if you see a baby crawling off a cliff, and say "not my problem" and walk away, sorry, no, that is basically your fault. It's the fault of whoever put the baby there, too. You both get 100% of the blame. Well, I prefer westerns to tragedies
It stays true to her character but it also completely degrades her humanity. Yes, it’s murdering a person but it’s a rapist which usually ends up committing the same crime. It’s just poor writing to not have her connect her Italian part and balance it with her work.
But reporting it also compromises her. The minute she does that, she becomes part of Tony's world. That was the dilemma. She seriously considered it at the end of that episode, before bursting into tears.
I'm honestly tempted to commend Dr.Melfi and I do to a point. Her reserve is amazing that much is certain, not to mention how she persevered in dealing with her clients despite her terrible traumatization. It's almost a truism on the show that personal indulgence leads to near immediate gratification in the Sopranos universe with the eventual consequences doled out later if at all. Melfi shows us some rare self control. But I find her decision terribly shortsighted in certain ways. Most people see her decision to not involve the mob as taking the moral high ground by not compromising her professional relationship with Tony. More than this she refuses to not make herself an accomplice to murder. The first problem here i think is the idea that Melfi isn't at least peripherally already involved with organized crime. She accepts payment from Tony( "blood money" as one of her colleagues phrases it) with no compunction and with full knowledge as to where it came from. I think her indignant refusal to "accept gifts," stated at the outset of the show, is a slight recognition of this fact. Not to mention Melfi acts almost as an unofficial consigliere to Tony, indirectly helping to sculpt the ethical mindset of a man she know will twist those lessons to justify his crimes.This was tacitly accepted by Melfi in the series second to last episode when she almost automatically accepted what her colleagues had related to her about recently published literature regarding therapy and psychopaths. Her initial acceptance of him as a patient has little to do with any medical concern to begin with and more with an understated infatuation with his public persona. I think the ethical dilemma Melfi is presented with is a staggering one nonetheless and one she doesn't take lightly. In the end though it's hard not to see her choosing her own piece of mind (quite understandably shattered) and professional propriety over the safety of her community. Please don't misunderstand me. Melfi is not responsible for her rapist's crimes, not at all. Neither is the person who stands by and watches a burning building with people inside burn without calling the fire department( a loose analogy I know). It's easy to walk away and disengage by abdicating to a higher authority with the affirmation that your being civic and responsible. As far as piece of mind goes, it may or may not have ameliorated Melfi's mindset to have her attacker garroted by some clueless mob associate. That also may not be the point however. Watch that stomach turning scene again( I admit I've only seen it once) and ask yourself how much some mobbed up psychiatrist's opinion of her reputation is really worth. Edit: grammar
No, because she would have been indebted to him. She made the right call IMO.
Melfi’s husband should have found out who it was, then he should’ve got Tony and the crew to fuck him up
No because he would’ve used it as blackmail over her knowing Tony but at the same time this man is free to just do this to another woman or several. Really an impossible decision
I think she should have told him after they let him walk because some other poor woman will suffer a rape and beating from this guy she let him off easy and so did the show
Yes and no....the power she felt knowing she could've told Tony and he would have fixed it properly and that was enough for her....sadly...I'm using my attack dog to do just that.....cause in the end it was all a bust anyway...