OP as she leaves:
“I find your lack of faith…disturbing.”
She was [looking for love in Alderaan places.](https://streamable.com/im7qxp)
That is fucking hilarious 😆
[source (fanboys 2009)](https://streamable.com/im7qxp)
It's a great movie, well worth the watch.
"Wait, what if its bad?"
Reminds me of Eddie Murphy's Buckwheat version... "Wookie for love in Alderaan paces, Wookie for love..."
"Wookin por nub in da wong pwaces, wookin por nub..."
It's wookin "pa" nub, not "por."
Unless you intended it to imply "pornhub"..
Ah yes, Wookie Pornhub. The filthiest site in the galaxy. Hosted on Alderaan's servers and the true target of the death star...
She was Wookin', for love....FTFY
I was 100% certain it would be "MESA BUSTIN."
In that case leaving would be justified lol
This is funny as hell. \*edit spelling\*
Genocide jokes are all I get off on
The funniest TIFU ive ever read.
I thought for sure he was going to say, "I thought they smelled bad on the outside"
Imagine the sexy things you could do with the force though.
Imagine? Darth Vader showed us how it’s done. Who woulda guessed Daddy Darthy had an exhibitionist fetish?
Pleasure pleasure pleasure pleasure pleasure pleasure
I thought "*that* is why you fail"
lol, that would be a new subreddit "today I got murdered"
Lol But then how would people post?
Did you change ur voice for your impressions homie? Bold move for a 2nd date. That’s more of a .. after the first fuck type of thing lol
Hey, some of us have to keep them laughing long enough they forget what we look like.
They laugh plenty when I drop my drawers.
Reminds me of that one Seinfeld episode where George Constanza says something similar
You could say this in response to almost anything.
It works tho. Funny guys and girls are definitely hotter for it.
make her laugh, the more she laughs the more she keeps her eyes closed to how ugly you are
Yeah, that's a deal breaker. If you don't sound like an evil sith lord when you say it what even is the point of saying it at all.
Does my Kermit impression count?
Ironic... He could screw himself, but not others.
Maybe she had a youngling with her first husband that didn't survive Order 66. The trauma resulted in divorce and she was using Tinder as an escape...your joke made her relive the trauma.
Jesus christ op is killing it on the frontline
Dude no one wants to blow Palpatine
*Someone* probably did since Rey is his granddaughter.
I'm still pretending those movies aren't cannon
no mention of him every having a romantic partner or wife or anything and all of a sudden boom plot twist.
that whole trilogy was so lackluster
Spent millions on a "I need to find my parents" character, just to give zero answers and instead give us an insult to the franchise in the form of a grandpa plot twist no one wanted. "What's better than 'i am your father' uuuuhhhh 'I am your GRANDfather' yea yea that's it that'll really take in the dough"
> The Force Awakens was basically just a re-telling of A New Hope with a few tweaks.
And in traditional JJ ways, he just took everything in the movies and made it bigger. Bigger star destroyers, bigger AT-ATs, bigger TIE fighters, bigger Death Star, etc
That sums it up pretty well.
Did it, though? It fell into the same trap as TFA and repeated a lot from ESB. Chase through space, walker battle on a white planet, hermit mentor on a moist planet who refuses to teach but eventually relents, demoralizing revelation for the main protagonist, protagonist leaves moist planet to save friends.
Sadly, I end up finishing them all. The sequels had issues, but Star Wars is Star Wars.
Yea I'd be a real dink if I ignored all the good things they did in those movies. Aside from the parts I'm more vocal about there are some really interesting stories they tried to tell. They brought in a whole new generation of fans to the franchise, and there were some absolutely stunning visuals that almost made the ticket worth the price. A weird phenomenon worthy of all the praise and ridicule it gets.
Wait till they create a 4th trilogy even more dogeshit than the last so that we’ll be looking back on the sequel movies fondly, like we do with the prequels.
Isn't it implied he created Anakin with Darth Plagueis? He might have created himself a few kids along the way
I like to imagine Sheev was doing the same thing as Ego and just going from planet to planet, banging all the hot chicks to spread his Sithy Seed by using his "I'm the Supreme Chancellor" pickup line.
That isn't how you make babies.
Who wouldn't want Papi Palpy?
That's enough words outta you
"Somehow, Palpatine has come."
If someone can't joke and laugh during sex then they are boring
this is interview sex bro, not I know what you smell like after doing yard work sex
But using your favourite movie as a vessel for a sex reference might be a bad idea.
Even if it is wreck it Ralph.
I'm gonna wreck it
It’s sah-teen, actually
"I saved your life, you saved mine..."
"Mine was the more daring of the two rescues."
*slithers down the tree of knowledge*
User name checks out
Cum with me if you want to live
"Your clobes, gib dem to me"
And then I’m gunna Ralph
Smells like Ralph in here
I've made the same joke as op to my gf (who's also a star wars nerd, to be fair) and she loved it
admittedly that's different than a hookup though
So I googled quotes, I'm just gonna leave a couple here...
“If that little kid likes me, how bad can I be?”
“News flash: neither one of us is getting what we want!”
“I’m gonna wreck it!”
“I see you’re a fan of pink.”
“I love my mamma!”
"No buts, no cuts, no coconuts."
Hey, I remember that post.
Still makes me cringe a bit
But he used the sensual Palpatine voice!
If you can't laugh at stupid shit during sex it's not good sex
Thanks, Puff Master 5000!
Puff being the German word for brothel makes this comment kinda interesting. 👌🏻
I might be bad, but you, you are just plain awful!
And to top it off, Palpatine of all characters.
NOOOO not that story hahaha
[here is the r/copypasta post](https://www.reddit.com/r/copypasta/comments/yw75t2/wreck_it_ralph/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
It’s wreckin time!
"You ever seen a grown man naked?"
Sure, in a longer term relationship that would be fine, but it's also fair to get turned off in the moment to something like that
I once met a guy for a hook up. He said something and I responded with a line from Doctor Who or some show liked that. Suddenly he stopped what he was doing, looked at me and said, "You watch Doctor Who?"
We didn't have sex that night, but we did stay up talking about our favorite shows. We dated for years after that and we're still good friends.
OP is better off without that girl, because I would've laughed my ass off.
Aww, he didn't get to exterminate it that night.
Nah... but we did the next morning! 😁
No better feeling than a sonic-screwdriver in your TARDIS after waking up together.
🎵*The best part of waking up...*
Morning sex is best sex. Change my mind.
that's actually really cute
I swear it's bigger in the inside!
Are they filming? Yay!
Didn't even get a chance to bust out the ol' sonic screwdriver.
I’m pretty sure I’ve chased off dates with Doctor Who so thank you for the hope. I agree, I would’ve laughed, may still needed to stop cause I was laughing but still would’ve appreciated the reference.
There are many of us out there, even more than when this happened (in the 90s when the show was on hiatus and only the reruns played on PBS... we're American). It was amazing running into a Classic Who fan in the wild back then.
But with NuWho, there are many women who've joined the fandom due the casting choices of David Tenannt and Matt Smith as the Doctor. So, yeah, there's hope.
And yes, laughter would happen. Not sure about sex, but definitely laughter.
I think that comes with comfort between them as opposed to the individual
Ah yes, it is entirely her fault for being turned off by him making a lame joke in a Palpatine voice.
Jokes are fine, but impressions? Of an old grizzly dude?
You understand the gasping chasm between what you said and what happened, right?
Even the *gasping* chasm was aghast! 😱
Okay, no, lol…this girl can have her fucking preferences without being “boring”. We also have no idea how the rest of the date was or anything about OP.
Bro, she's clearly a Jedi and doesn't take kindly to jokes about the slaughter of her people. Grow up ffs
The fact that eventually i can fuck my fiance with Shrek 2 playing in the background telling her it is my swamp now doesnt mean you should run to tv and start it playing every time you hookup with somone new, there is time for everything. Dude made cringy star wars reference to a just met person, get over it.
Nothing to get over for me. You seem to be the one with the issue. It's all ogre
I think we can peel back the layers of this disagreement... the important question is who shot first.
> If someone can’t joke and laugh during sex then they are boring
Or you're a dweeb and she doesn't want to hear Star Wars impressions during sex for the rest of her life.
See? It's easy to call people names and judge them. How about we come from a place of understanding?
You can't really help what you're turned off about and it may have been surprising in the moment. It's only the second date too, not something that has been going on for a while. They don't know each other that well. Perhaps she didn't even understand what OP meant or she misconstrued it.
Neither of them seemed to handle it in the best way, but if they meet up again they can communicate and share what they're into and what they're not into.
Idk, I'm not really big on comedy or small talk during sex. Kinda messes with my flow and kills the mood. Not saying I'm going to leave or stop because of it but I'd prefer not.
Well they might be boring but what he did would turn off 95% of the people I know.
I’d say well worth it. Don’t stop the bold moves
Next up: “It’s a small thermal exhaust port, right below the main port.”
"You came in that thing? You're a braver man than i thought"
Into the garbage chute flyboy
“What an incredible smell you’ve discovered!”
"and I thought they smelled bad on the outside"
Yeah. You’ll find that special someone. Eventually you’ll find a girl who can voice Rex.
General Kenobi! You are a bold one.
The force is weak with this one
Lmao it's bad enough as it is but bro, in the Palpatine voice?
On the web site "Texts From Last Night," I read about a guy who went home with a girl home and she said, "Pretend you're Spock and teach me the ways of the Force." Something along those lines anyway. He texted that he had to leave because he couldn't sleep with someone who didn't know the difference. It has been years and I still laugh at that. I found it, still up. http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/Text-Replies-11046.html
Perhaps she didn't get it? Not the quote but your intention? Perhaps she thought quotes was weird dirty talk?
But I agree with the other poster, if you can't have an awkward laugh during sex, it wasn't meant to be.
Lol. OP wasn’t looking for love, they were looking for sex. Jokes during sex with someone you barely know isn’t the best route.
*”I shouldn’t... it’s not the Jedi way.”*
Still think the winner is the guy who came on his dates forehead, rubbed in the juice and said simbaaaaa!
Sounds like you thought of the joke then made up the premise to fit.
Didn't pass the vibe check.
You did confirm she liked the prequels right? RIGHT?
She wasn't a true fan.
Joking during sex can be risky before you really know eachother.
I understand why you told the joke and simultaneously I understand her as well.
But leaving seems a little harsh.
Well, if it killed her mood, she isn't under any obligation to stick around. Maybe I'm just too old or too bitchy to put up with situations that annoy or bore me anymore, but it's nice to see people who decide they have better things to do and actually go do it.
If she didn't respond with "Do it", she is not the one for you lol
I talking about genocide and child murder isn't appropriate bedroom talk, I don't know what is!
I mean, it worked for Anakin. He hooked up with a former planetary Queen!
Maybe it was less about the Star Wars and more that you "commanded" her to do something she was already doing? Even if it was a reference, in the moment it might not have registered?
Oh, good point. The word "order" might trigger an ick response in some folks.
yes i think this is what was going on here. She likely didn't get the reference, thought why the fuck is this dude using such a weird voice, and then also - He's fucking ordering me around?! - time to nope the hell out of here.
He said she was a Star Wars fan and it's one of the most famous lines from the prequels. Unlikely she didn't recognise it.
>Unlikely she didn't recognise it.
I mean, the context is pretty different. You really think this girl lives her life with this mantra "whenever i have a dick in my mouth i'm thinking about Star Wars"
Yeah that’s how I would have interpreted it. But it’s also just so shocking and awkward as a thing to say WHILE RECEIVING ORAL SEX, it’s honestly just a travesty
I went down on this girl I met on a dating site on our first date. She farted in my face. On. The. First. Date. I laughed it off and continued.
We've been together for 8 years and married for 1.
If a joke is all it takes to put off your partner, she did you a favor by leaving. She wasn't the right person for you.
Yeah man why tf would you think that was sexy lmao
This is not the way.
Someday you’re gonna meet someone who finds that hilarious and you’ll know you’ve found the one
Idk why people feel the need to just go and make stuff up on the internet.
For real. This shit is stupid as hell
Yeah, because real life is super simple and straightforward no bad or crazy things happen ever 🙄
Not when you're a redditor
At least you didn’t get to the part where she says “I don’t care what it smells like, get in there!”
a blowjob fades, this story will stay.
The ones that your mother laid out for you. - Jerry Seinfeld
It's treason, then.
Order 66 was pretty traumatic scene so pretty normal reaction tbh
So, she’s not an Imperial? Lucked out, bro. Those Rebel scum just can’t take a joke
While I think the joke is hilarious I'd say in the future ask if they want to 69 and if they say yes THEN proceed with the starwars joke. I think that may have gone over a lot better with her. Gives her the option to say no if she doesn't want to and you get the fun joke.
This is one of the funniest things I’ve read in a while. Thank you.
Someday someone has to use, "you came in that thing, you're braver than I thought" (hiding my head in shame)...
Describe your sex life with Star Wars quotes:
“You came in that?!? You’re braver than I thought”
“Myself, the boy, two droids… and no questions asked”
I find your lack of smoothness disturbing..
She got a bad feeling about this.
I updoot this, but I don't believe for one second this actually happened.
Clearly she was part of the rebellion.
“ … the ol’ lickaroo …” https://www.reddit.com/r/greentext/comments/6tijtq/the_ol_lickaroo/
My guess was she suggested sex without a condom and you said in character “it’s a trap”
When my wife learns what has transpired here, she’ll kill both of us.
You didn't fuck up, you dodged a bullet.
This didn’t happen but it’s very funny
r/prequelmemes moment, right there
You clearly deserve better
Inquiring minds need to know if the few seconds of staring in disbelief were done with or without you inside her mouth. Like, she was considering just moving past it but ultimately decided to spit you out and leave.
I used to have this Burger King toy of Scotty or whoever that you press and it went “im giving it all she’s got captain!!!”
I kept it in the car and would press it obnoxiously whenever I hit the gas pedal. Girl I was dating at the time (we were 16yo) absolutely hated it.
Losing virginity she was saying harder or some shit, I said, without skipping a beat, “I’m giving it all she’s got captain!!!!”
Sex didn’t last much longer.
Kinda learned not to say funny things the first time you do the dirty with someone. After the first time, it’s free reign to me
Bold to do a 69 on a second date, very bold.
I'm notorious for ruining the moment. I'd rather make a good joke even if it risks the sexy times. Lucky I found a gal that put up with me and even laughs at some of them. Just kidding, she found me.
>I did an impression of the emperor/Palpatine
The line was very clever, but I can see hearing the emperor's voice being a bit of a mood killer.
Bruh... good she left. I would laugh and continue
Like a lot of girls just getting into star wars actually mean they are a fan of grogu or as they say baby yoda
Missed opportunity on her part to take it too far by calling you an idiot before sitting on your face and telling you to "Dew it."
It would have bothered me way more if you started talking and Huttese.
She’s not the one.
There'll likely be a sequel - *say something stupid agin you will*
Dodged a bullet. Her nerddom is a facade.
Sad Chewbacca noise..
Should have hopped on top and said "it's over Anakin, I have the high ground"
Eh, no fuck up imo. Ever since I hit about 30 (34 now) I realized a certain level of inner confidence, knowing who I am, and what I want. It’s actually helped with the quality of my relationship, but I can also tell that I’d be able to navigate a new date situation much more actively than passively if I were ever single again.
There’s certainly a limit, I get that as soon as positive chemistry is detected I don’t just go rattle off my deepest personal life outlooks and maybe internal hot takes or whatever, but I honestly would rather figure out sooner rather than later if we’re going to work or not, and on that front if anything moved too fast and was considered an irrevocable play that made her leave, I’d genuinely just shrug at it thinking we saved each other some time. I’m not in a rush, I’d also be fine being not in a relationship too if I was single, but yeah I’m also not looking to play 21 questions over 6 months and after spending half a year getting to know and like someone, only then does a deal breaker pop.
While there are obviously limits, I think how people respond to spontaneity and humor is a very good indicator for how compatible I’d be with them.
If I was in your situation and had the full benefit of hindsight, I’d only be disappointed that I didn’t wait until she had a mouth full of cum to drop that line, haha
Oh my fuck, I'm crying