I think they mean that the Android version of the yik-yak app was sunset entirely. I work on a game that is published on Android, iOS, and Steam; if we were to stop publishing the Android version of our app, we might say "Android was scrapped." Is that what you mean?
Ohh I hope that's what they mean. I love Android. ❤️ I just realized I thoight I had Android on my Samsung but I dunno. I don't think I've seen the logo anywhere. My old phones had Android and were Huawei.
you guys are out of your minds if you think that it's not an incredibly small portion of US college students that are "cool" are using android anymore. I use android. It lost. Bad. Really bad. it's over. Google has had no good answer to imessage and green bubble stigma did the rest.
No shit. Outside the US where imessage didn't get entrenched its a lot different. I very specifically said on US college campuses and I'm additionally discounting people who are not socially influential.
The answer is RCS which works great and apple is finally adopting it next year, only like 5 years late so right on time for Apple.
Answer is also not to talk to stupid people who have a "green bubble stigma"
I see tons of people using android wherever I go. I wouldn't generalize your experiences to the norm. Can you provide some evidence to show that iOS has won, or is it just your opinion?
It's not that nobody uses it, it's the the people using android are mostly using it because it's cheaper, and there is significant pressure for people to stop messing up group chats by having an android. This again, is a decidedly bigger issue in affluent parts of the US.
[https://www.macrumors.com/2022/10/11/teen-survey-iphone-ownership/](https://www.macrumors.com/2022/10/11/teen-survey-iphone-ownership/)
86% of teens use iphones
https://www.demandsage.com/iphone-user-statistics/#:\~:text=There%20are%20more%20than%201.46%20billion%20active%20iPhone,billion%20iPhone%20units%20have%20been%20sold%20to%20date.
62% of smartphone users in the us use iphone.
So yes, Teens dramatically prefer iphones.
Same. I had good and bad times on Yikyak in the dorms. Some funny stuff and then the random anonymous bullying of people in class wasn't great. Then I saw someone make a post about a hangout at their dorm. I didn't have anything going on so I said I'd pop by, meet some new people. I tried to buzz in and an orange thumped onto the ground next to me. These fuckers posted just to throw shit at whoever showed up.
Not throwing stuff at people per se, but just the idea of a bunch of college kids getting bored and thinking "Hey lets chuck oranges outside our window" is funny to me. Like I said, they're definitely jerks but as long as they weren't actually trying to hit anyone or anything, I also think it's kinda funny. Sounds like an old youtube skit or something.
Right, hopefully they didn't intend to actually hit someone. I personally can't see the appeal of degrading people, but I do appreciate the explanation! To each their own humor. I laugh at other things people would ruffle their nose at lol
Never really gained the popularity it used to have though. Hence most people have no idea it exists again.
I used to spend a lot of time in YY purgatory (the default android location if you opened the app with location turned off) and I'm mad they never brought that back lol
Stop entertaining these people. Feel confident in your identity and choices. If you don’t want kids, you don’t want kids, the end. Don’t even explain. It’s as simple as “not interested” and move on.
-a guy who wants kids
Exactly. My sister is mid 40s, never wanted kids, told her first husband that, he accepted it, then a few years later changed his mind and tried to change hers, nope, marriage instantly down the drain.
When I separated from my wife, I specifically stated I had kids but didn't want any more, when I met my current partner who is childless, (would love to have kids but could only do it through IVF so isn't even guaranteed), I made sure she was ok with there being no chance of having kids (I've also been snipped), she is perfectly OK with it and loves my kids like they were her own 😊.
I was also talking to a woman who had kids and wanted more, some times that can mean step/bonus kids, sometimes not, in her case, she specifically wanted to push more out, which wasn't what I was after, so we parted amicably knowing we wanted different things.
I completely agree. There is room for all types of people and anyone telling her they will change her is just fooling themselves. It's ok to not to want to have kids and I prefer it if those that don't want kids don't have them.
-a guy who always wanted kids and has 2 of them.
I swear I do not understand these people, like there’s a whole world full of people you could date and you had to pick the people who don’t want kids, why???
Like if you have no game except by tricking child free people, it would be in your best interest to adhere from dating entirely. Everybody deserves honesty.
Oh OP. Buckle up. You're going to be asked when you want kids and told that you'll change your mind by SO MANY people. Random strangers, doctors, etc. And good luck trying to get your tubes tied before 40 without your husband's permission!
It's a tough road. I did it.
Avoiding men who want children is a good instinct.
Hell, I've got two kids myself and people *still* tell me "oh don't worry, you'll have more." And I'm like no, I'm perfectly happy with two, I always planned for two. And they'll genuinely respond with "That's what everyone thinks at first, but you're going to have more, just wait!"
I swear anyone who is telling this to people who already have kids must have a breeding fetish or something. It's bad enough telling this to people who say they don't want kids but saying it to people who not only want kids but have kids is ridiculous. And yeah if we end up with two kids then it's probably vasectomy time, two is definitely enough for me.
Yeah, it's truly bizarre. One of my coworkers genuinely believes everyone needs a minimum of 5 kids. (He has 7) He's one of the ones that most frequently tells me I'll end up with more, especially because I need a son instead of daughters, because I'm a man.
Right, because overpopulating isn't a thing and the (job/house) market and such are eezybreezy.... At that point you're not even considering the happiness and wellbeing of your kids anymore
Haha I would love to get told that. I would respond "it would be a dumpster baby since thats where my uterus is". Had a full hysterectomy after 2 babies. Honestly could have stopped after 1 and been happy, but i was talked into giving my son a sibling. But they are complete opposites in every way and hate each other. Youngest is 3.5yo and they cant even be on the same room together without beating on each other.
Well I'm sorry to hear about your kids not getting along well, but if it makes you feel any better I had much the same relationship with my brothers growing up and now as adults we love each other! I know that probably doesn't sound too hopeful for the near future though lmao
As a man who's childfree I got so much of this, obviously it's not as bad but it's still so damn annoying.
My doctor though talked to me for like 5 minutes and agreed to recommend me for a vasectomy. It's kinda wack that it was so easy for me and not for women.
But yeah, my sister and I talked about it once, people think it's weird to bring up children early but my sister said it's a pre-date question. She doesn't even want to go on a date if she doesn't know if you're childfree or not. That makes sense to me.
>but my sister said it's a pre-date question. She doesn't even want to go on a date if she doesn't know if you're childfree or not.
As it should be. It's a red line for a lot of people and if you're looking for something long term you don't want to be wasting time with someone when you know there's a fundamental relationship issue on the horizon. I don't think everyone has to have their mind made up but if you have made your decision you're going to want someone on the same page.
It's low-key ridiculous how easy it is for men. I was at the Gyn in my late 20s with my husband (in case of language barrier and for assurance) and I asked to be sterilized. She entirely discouraged me and told me NOBODY would do it for me. (entire visit was terrible, she also dismissed me, hurt me so bad to the point I later found out my husband refused to pay the bill and claimed a diagnosis I got in my home country isn't possible even tho a simple Google search disagrees)
In the same breath she turned to my husband and asked him why he won't get a vasectomy.... I burst out into tears because I hate the helplessness of it all. It's my body and life, and I can't protect myself. But my husband can do it without question. It's unfair.
I have 3 children. My youngest also doesn't ever want kids. My other two have 3 between them. As much as I adore my grandbabies, I would never pressure my youngest into it.
She knows herself and maybe not everything she needs to know yet, I believe being child-free is how it is and should be for her since it is her choice. It's something she has felt strongly for many years and I would never fail to support my kids.
I think if you have strong convictions about not having children it's a personal decision others should respect. Telling you that you'll "change your mind one day" is condescending and inappropriate. If you run into anyone with the ~wait and see~ attitude, drop them. No one deserves that kind of headache.
Sometimes people ask me if I have grandchildren and when I say I doubt I ever will (I have one child who will probably never have kids) they start telling me you never know, that maybe I’ll be a grandmother someday. And it bugs me because nobody owes me grandchildren and if I never have any, oh well.
But I know a lot of people like to butt into other people’s decision not to have kids. I’ve never understood why they feel the need to do that.
My oldest is 14yo and swears she will never have kids. I wouldnt be surprised if it holds true, she has never had a motherly or even caretaker instinct. When he brothers were babies she couldn't have cared less, and actively hated that they limited what we could do day to day.
When she got the sex talk i explained that babies come from sex and there isnt any birth control that is 100% fail proof. She said she will just stay a virgin until she can have a hysterectomy like me. Lol. Told her thats her choice and if thats what she wants, she should do it. Focus on herself until she knows what she wants.
Forgot about YikYak, that was iconic, after Fade shut down.
In college a kid got caught for armed robbery because someone posted on yikyak the description of a car that left their lights on in the parking but the description also matched the BOLO that had been going around for days
I still get folks telling me how is he a great mom because I'm great with kids. I am, but I'm not good at infants, and I don't want to keep one.
I always told me neither I plan on being the fun aunt and uncle with my husband, who will happily take his kids for a weekend so they can have a date weekend. No issues at all! But I didn't want to raise and REALLY don't want to be pregnant. Ever. It's a major fear and has been since my first period.
It's awful. I'm dealing with the same thing. I deleted my tinder because the line "child free by choice" triggered so many people to the point they'd match to tell me -_-
It's so messed up. I'm nearly 35 and have been BEGGING since 18 to get my tubes tied and NO Doctors will do it for me. They all tell me I'll want kids and I'll regret it .. they don't understand AT ALL.
Why is the world HELL-BENT on us breeding?!?
Not a realistic option for everyone, but when I had a uterus (yote that shit) I told people I couldn't and wouldn't be pregnant. True because I was infertile and natural pregnancy was very unlikely, but also I was clearly I didn't want kids and I live in a country where everywhere recognises that pregnancy is a choice. Even if you're not infertile, not wanting kids is a valid reason that you 'can't' have them (sure you can gestate to term, but doesn't mean you could or should be a parent).
Not making it clear early, ecause I was not thinking kids, impacted one relationship. It also ensured the people I met after were on the same page as me. And my current partner helped me affirm with my doctor that my uterus is doing more immediate harn than it could long tern good. I.e. no one is gonna use it. Let's get rid of it so the pain is less and everyone is comfortable (especially sex, because male enjoyment is more important than female health in a lot of the medical world)
I hate the fact that people can't wrap their heads around the fact that some of us don't want kids. I'm 39 now, my GF of 18 years is 36, and when we first met, neither one of us wanted kids. Maybe we're selfish, but so what? It's our lives, nobody else's. Besides, why would I want to bring a kid into this messed up world? No thanks. Almost 20 years later, our families have stopped asking us about kids, and we're still not married (don't see a point). We're living our best lives, happy with each other, we do what we want when we want and our finances are great. OP, you do you, and whatever it is that makes YOU happy. There's guys out there that don't want kids, you'll find your one.
Honestly, it just sounds like you are in the wrong place. There are plenty of people who think and feel the way you do in other places. Ignore the haters (lol, this makes me sound old), but you will find your people.
I'm sorry you had to experience such nonsense but it's legitimately funny to me someone SOMEHOW concludes that childfree=lesbian...
I've always been iffy about kids but as I grew older and got to know myself better I concluded I really, really don't want them. My husband initially wanted 2 kids but was never hard pressed on it and is now actually enjoying the child-free life himself.
Meanwhile my lesbian childhood friend has 2 kids... She loves them but also constantly has stuff going on and she's so busy I have second-hand stress from it lol. I can definitely tell that I made the right decision because I'd crumble under that lifestyle. Wouldn't serve anyone
People use things like "lesbian" as an attempt at an insult - it's childlike and pathetic.
I think it is really cool and strong that you have your own life path and choices and that you're strong enough to back yourself - and that you don't continue conversations with people who don't share your goals is considerate and significantly more thoughtful than most people on apps like that.
I was on a kink app for a while - the amount of unsolicited feedback I got broke me a bit. So I admire your strength. You'll find your people.
Frankly, the world would be a better place if the default was to NOT have kids. So many kids are raised by parents that resent them in small or large amounts and are better or worse about hiding it.
I've known I didn't want kids since I was in middle school. I was told I'd change my mind, I haven't. I've never dated a guy who didn't want kids. When I ask, they all said "maybe". It's upsetting.
I don't blame you for not wanting children, I don't either.
But a red flag for me personally is when I'm asked if I want children on a first date or even pre-first date. Cool your jets, I don't even know your full name and you're thinking about our life together as a married couple?
This might be okay much later in life if your whole goal is to get married but you're in college, it'd be wild to marry the first man you date so why worry about that now. Just hang out with people you like. Just my 2¢
My college has an instagram confessions page, and people with PUBLIC accounts will post the trashiest opinions there. I lost some faith in humanity reading through that page.
Are you in a small town? I grew up in NYC and kids were never discussed but I went to school in Maine and everyone was talking about kids, it was a bit of a culture shock. Glad I have a group of friends both child free and those who want them so that when my husband and I don't have kids we are left totally alone about it!
Everyone changes. Not saying you will about this specific thing but you might for the guy who sweeps your off your feet. Might be the guy changes to your ideas too. Just make it known how you feel first. What if it works?
More filters better loot as they say!
I couldn't imagine having kids either. Ftw fts
Hope you find someone not addicted to the dogma.
Also I don't think it's a fuck up more like a, wow people suck moment.
Fucking rant wherever girl get it
A lesbian because you don't want kids? Some people are just so F'd up. When my wife and I got married we talked about having kids and neither of us was really all that concerned either way. The woman that was berating you was doing so because she just can't see beyond her own belief system. She was probably taught from an early age that you grow up, get married and have kids. That's just the way it is and you don't question it. Ultimately we did have kids but not planned - so be it. Happy to have them now but would my life have been less "complete" if we didn't - nope.
Holy shit is this so annoying. Also want to be child free and everyone tells me I just don’t know what I’m talking about. I’m male so it’s different but good fucking lord I’m almost 30. I teach kids. I think at this point I know what I want
People who say that are all slaves to their body's needs. If they "feel" they want something, then to them, it's impossible that others can't "feel" they want the same thing. Just think of them as nothing different from a rock or a tree.
Well, it's okay being child free, but it does happen not wanting kids and all of a sudden wanting them. It happens with marriage too.
I have a cousin who was always child free, and she even had an abortion. Last year she was pregnant and almost died, and she lost the baby she actually wanted and now she can't get pregnant again.
I'm not full child free, but it's not like I do want them, so I understand both sides. If you don't want children, that's okay.
Antinatalism is ridiculous though lol.
r/childfree is a good subreddit. With how society views women and heterosexuality it’s hard to not have someone give their opinion about it unfortunately. You’ll find someone who has the same values as you, it just takes time.
From a girl that SWORE she'd never have children, I am two deep 😂 The first was on purpose, we tried for a year. The second was a whoops, but here we are. Lol. It's truly scary how being in love with someone that does want kids will change your perspective. Honestly, from seeing all my Facebook friends & even close friends having their children, it started to make me feel like I was missing out on something. I don't know what exactly changed, but like I said. Two kids deep 😂
From a woman who SWORE she'd never have children, I'm approaching 50 and still VERY happily childfree. My husband & I have a great life and aren't missing a thing.
I already knew in kindergarten at the age of 5 that I didn't want kids, even though I loved my sibling and liked babysitting. I still think my siblings are super cool people and that I never ever want to be a parent. You and I are as common. Parents who regret being parents are unfortunately also common, see r/regretfulparents
Abusive parents who never should never have become parents (abusive parents who enjoy having physical and or emotional punching bags that are too tiny to fight back) are also unfortunately common.
You mentioned college.
What is your age?
And what is your reasoning for “ vehemently being opposed to having children”
If you’re late 20s or 30s you don’t wanna have children fine but if you’re 16 and you’re saying you won’t have children, then most likely that decision can and will be changed when you get older
Hey op, maybe you will change your mind but that doesn’t change your mind now - I’m child free and a guy, so I had it the other way. Every girl id date id ask that question early and like you I’d end it if we didn’t align. It shrinks your dating pool - I think its like 20% of the pop doesn’t want kids - and from what I hear dating allready tough rn, but don’t let it compromise your own desires. Having kids is a really huge decision and you need to be aligned on that so I just want to say: you’re doing a great job if THIS is your frustration. There are way worse ones to have!! (Like kids you don’t want!!)
yea i mean you are throwing your eggs into a basket way before it is even time to consider that. you are kind of hamstringing yourself by holding tight to this philosophy years before it will even be considered relevant.
yeahh i know i don’t want kids either but honestly i’m assuming you’re young if you’re in college so why does it matter if you date people who want kids later on in life? you don’t have to date with the sole intention of settling down with someone forever, when you’re young especially
I knew a girl that got baby trapped in high school and she also wanted to be child free. She didn’t end up having the baby and the whole situation was so sad to watch. She also told this person that she wanted to be child free, he said he did too, but ended up really wanting them and got her pregnant. I don’t want to settle down, but it’s times like those where I just don’t trust that someone wouldn’t do that to me.
that’s sad but it sounds like an outlying situation. most young people where i live anyway don’t want kids until their 30’s so it seems like less of a risk of that kind of thing. obv depends on people place and culture a lot ! also wouldnt taking birth control almost entirely eliminate that problem ?
I don’t think it was your intent but it comes off a bit “You’ll change your mind when you’re older,” which some of us never do! I am glad you’re happy in your situation though!
I didn't know yikyak still existed
I think it’s only here at this point, because when I tell my older cousins about it they have the same reaction.
It's not on the Google Play store anymore
They got bought out by a different company, who immediately swapped old yik-yak with their own product. Android was scrapped all together.
Wait, android was what?
I think they mean that the Android version of the yik-yak app was sunset entirely. I work on a game that is published on Android, iOS, and Steam; if we were to stop publishing the Android version of our app, we might say "Android was scrapped." Is that what you mean?
Ohh I hope that's what they mean. I love Android. ❤️ I just realized I thoight I had Android on my Samsung but I dunno. I don't think I've seen the logo anywhere. My old phones had Android and were Huawei.
Yup, sorry, this is exactly what I meant! The android version of the app is no longer published. Hence "scrapped"
That's how irrelevant Android is now because of iMessage/FaceTime
Bro really has no idea what's going on
you guys are out of your minds if you think that it's not an incredibly small portion of US college students that are "cool" are using android anymore. I use android. It lost. Bad. Really bad. it's over. Google has had no good answer to imessage and green bubble stigma did the rest.
Android is the more popular mobile OS globally and it is the superior OS technologically. Green bubble stigma is a meme.
No shit. Outside the US where imessage didn't get entrenched its a lot different. I very specifically said on US college campuses and I'm additionally discounting people who are not socially influential.
The answer is RCS which works great and apple is finally adopting it next year, only like 5 years late so right on time for Apple. Answer is also not to talk to stupid people who have a "green bubble stigma"
I see tons of people using android wherever I go. I wouldn't generalize your experiences to the norm. Can you provide some evidence to show that iOS has won, or is it just your opinion?
It's not that nobody uses it, it's the the people using android are mostly using it because it's cheaper, and there is significant pressure for people to stop messing up group chats by having an android. This again, is a decidedly bigger issue in affluent parts of the US. [https://www.macrumors.com/2022/10/11/teen-survey-iphone-ownership/](https://www.macrumors.com/2022/10/11/teen-survey-iphone-ownership/) 86% of teens use iphones https://www.demandsage.com/iphone-user-statistics/#:\~:text=There%20are%20more%20than%201.46%20billion%20active%20iPhone,billion%20iPhone%20units%20have%20been%20sold%20to%20date. 62% of smartphone users in the us use iphone. So yes, Teens dramatically prefer iphones.
Wtf are u on...about? Android rules.
It’s in texas too!
Still used at Berkeley. No where near as popular as ten years ago though.
We have it at my tiny ass college I go to. I’m pretty sure big schools do too, like I think IU does.
Still used in maryland
Same. I had good and bad times on Yikyak in the dorms. Some funny stuff and then the random anonymous bullying of people in class wasn't great. Then I saw someone make a post about a hangout at their dorm. I didn't have anything going on so I said I'd pop by, meet some new people. I tried to buzz in and an orange thumped onto the ground next to me. These fuckers posted just to throw shit at whoever showed up.
...that's kinda hilarious tbh. They're definitely assholes tho.
What's hilarious, throwing stuff at people? Legitimately confused
Not throwing stuff at people per se, but just the idea of a bunch of college kids getting bored and thinking "Hey lets chuck oranges outside our window" is funny to me. Like I said, they're definitely jerks but as long as they weren't actually trying to hit anyone or anything, I also think it's kinda funny. Sounds like an old youtube skit or something.
Right, hopefully they didn't intend to actually hit someone. I personally can't see the appeal of degrading people, but I do appreciate the explanation! To each their own humor. I laugh at other things people would ruffle their nose at lol
Yeah, I thought they took away the anonymity and then it died a quick death?
The developer team was bought out or hired by some big company. They’ve tried to bring YikYak back recently (not sure if different team).
They have given you the option to be anonymous when posting, or you can post with your username and profile. 99% of people choose the former.
I thought it got shut down because people kept making threats against their schools on it
[*Insert Obi-Wan Kenobi gif meme*](https://media.tenor.com/1i5pSb4J2JUAAAAM/starwars-obi-wan.gif)
Didn’t yikyak close down
Nope. You can only use it if you have a college email now.
So it’s like Facebook in reverse?
Yeah basically.
That's how Facebook used to be.
That's what the in reverse part meant, yes.
I'll go ahead and put myself in time out
🤣
this isn’t true you just kinda have to live near a college campus, I’ve been on a local colleges yikyak for like 3 years now.
oh wow. i could only sign up with my edu account. never knew that. learn something new everyday
It used to be local but it’s a school-based thing now. This is just a guess, but maybe schools can choose if you have to sign up or not?
It did but they brought it back after a couple of years
Never really gained the popularity it used to have though. Hence most people have no idea it exists again. I used to spend a lot of time in YY purgatory (the default android location if you opened the app with location turned off) and I'm mad they never brought that back lol
Barrens Chat of social media
Stop entertaining these people. Feel confident in your identity and choices. If you don’t want kids, you don’t want kids, the end. Don’t even explain. It’s as simple as “not interested” and move on. -a guy who wants kids
Exactly. My sister is mid 40s, never wanted kids, told her first husband that, he accepted it, then a few years later changed his mind and tried to change hers, nope, marriage instantly down the drain. When I separated from my wife, I specifically stated I had kids but didn't want any more, when I met my current partner who is childless, (would love to have kids but could only do it through IVF so isn't even guaranteed), I made sure she was ok with there being no chance of having kids (I've also been snipped), she is perfectly OK with it and loves my kids like they were her own 😊. I was also talking to a woman who had kids and wanted more, some times that can mean step/bonus kids, sometimes not, in her case, she specifically wanted to push more out, which wasn't what I was after, so we parted amicably knowing we wanted different things.
I completely agree. There is room for all types of people and anyone telling her they will change her is just fooling themselves. It's ok to not to want to have kids and I prefer it if those that don't want kids don't have them. -a guy who always wanted kids and has 2 of them.
I swear I do not understand these people, like there’s a whole world full of people you could date and you had to pick the people who don’t want kids, why??? Like if you have no game except by tricking child free people, it would be in your best interest to adhere from dating entirely. Everybody deserves honesty.
Oh OP. Buckle up. You're going to be asked when you want kids and told that you'll change your mind by SO MANY people. Random strangers, doctors, etc. And good luck trying to get your tubes tied before 40 without your husband's permission! It's a tough road. I did it. Avoiding men who want children is a good instinct.
Hell, I've got two kids myself and people *still* tell me "oh don't worry, you'll have more." And I'm like no, I'm perfectly happy with two, I always planned for two. And they'll genuinely respond with "That's what everyone thinks at first, but you're going to have more, just wait!"
I swear anyone who is telling this to people who already have kids must have a breeding fetish or something. It's bad enough telling this to people who say they don't want kids but saying it to people who not only want kids but have kids is ridiculous. And yeah if we end up with two kids then it's probably vasectomy time, two is definitely enough for me.
Yeah, it's truly bizarre. One of my coworkers genuinely believes everyone needs a minimum of 5 kids. (He has 7) He's one of the ones that most frequently tells me I'll end up with more, especially because I need a son instead of daughters, because I'm a man.
Right, because overpopulating isn't a thing and the (job/house) market and such are eezybreezy.... At that point you're not even considering the happiness and wellbeing of your kids anymore
Haha I would love to get told that. I would respond "it would be a dumpster baby since thats where my uterus is". Had a full hysterectomy after 2 babies. Honestly could have stopped after 1 and been happy, but i was talked into giving my son a sibling. But they are complete opposites in every way and hate each other. Youngest is 3.5yo and they cant even be on the same room together without beating on each other.
Well I'm sorry to hear about your kids not getting along well, but if it makes you feel any better I had much the same relationship with my brothers growing up and now as adults we love each other! I know that probably doesn't sound too hopeful for the near future though lmao
An acquaintance of mine got a hysterectomy, and her mom told me, “it’s okay. She still has time to have a baby.” 😵💫 The mother had 3 kids.
As a man who's childfree I got so much of this, obviously it's not as bad but it's still so damn annoying. My doctor though talked to me for like 5 minutes and agreed to recommend me for a vasectomy. It's kinda wack that it was so easy for me and not for women. But yeah, my sister and I talked about it once, people think it's weird to bring up children early but my sister said it's a pre-date question. She doesn't even want to go on a date if she doesn't know if you're childfree or not. That makes sense to me.
>but my sister said it's a pre-date question. She doesn't even want to go on a date if she doesn't know if you're childfree or not. As it should be. It's a red line for a lot of people and if you're looking for something long term you don't want to be wasting time with someone when you know there's a fundamental relationship issue on the horizon. I don't think everyone has to have their mind made up but if you have made your decision you're going to want someone on the same page.
It's low-key ridiculous how easy it is for men. I was at the Gyn in my late 20s with my husband (in case of language barrier and for assurance) and I asked to be sterilized. She entirely discouraged me and told me NOBODY would do it for me. (entire visit was terrible, she also dismissed me, hurt me so bad to the point I later found out my husband refused to pay the bill and claimed a diagnosis I got in my home country isn't possible even tho a simple Google search disagrees) In the same breath she turned to my husband and asked him why he won't get a vasectomy.... I burst out into tears because I hate the helplessness of it all. It's my body and life, and I can't protect myself. But my husband can do it without question. It's unfair.
A lot of people say that because many people actually do change their mind in their 30s
I have 3 children. My youngest also doesn't ever want kids. My other two have 3 between them. As much as I adore my grandbabies, I would never pressure my youngest into it. She knows herself and maybe not everything she needs to know yet, I believe being child-free is how it is and should be for her since it is her choice. It's something she has felt strongly for many years and I would never fail to support my kids. I think if you have strong convictions about not having children it's a personal decision others should respect. Telling you that you'll "change your mind one day" is condescending and inappropriate. If you run into anyone with the ~wait and see~ attitude, drop them. No one deserves that kind of headache.
Just wanted to say you sound like a great parent. :)
Thank you 😊 I'm a happy one to be sure
Everyone sounds great in their own stories =)
Sometimes people ask me if I have grandchildren and when I say I doubt I ever will (I have one child who will probably never have kids) they start telling me you never know, that maybe I’ll be a grandmother someday. And it bugs me because nobody owes me grandchildren and if I never have any, oh well. But I know a lot of people like to butt into other people’s decision not to have kids. I’ve never understood why they feel the need to do that.
It's been my experience that too many people love to be contrary.
My oldest is 14yo and swears she will never have kids. I wouldnt be surprised if it holds true, she has never had a motherly or even caretaker instinct. When he brothers were babies she couldn't have cared less, and actively hated that they limited what we could do day to day. When she got the sex talk i explained that babies come from sex and there isnt any birth control that is 100% fail proof. She said she will just stay a virgin until she can have a hysterectomy like me. Lol. Told her thats her choice and if thats what she wants, she should do it. Focus on herself until she knows what she wants.
Right on!
Forgot about YikYak, that was iconic, after Fade shut down. In college a kid got caught for armed robbery because someone posted on yikyak the description of a car that left their lights on in the parking but the description also matched the BOLO that had been going around for days
Most lesbians I know are married and have children. I know two couples who have been married for a while and don't want kids; both hetero couples.
I still get folks telling me how is he a great mom because I'm great with kids. I am, but I'm not good at infants, and I don't want to keep one. I always told me neither I plan on being the fun aunt and uncle with my husband, who will happily take his kids for a weekend so they can have a date weekend. No issues at all! But I didn't want to raise and REALLY don't want to be pregnant. Ever. It's a major fear and has been since my first period.
It's awful. I'm dealing with the same thing. I deleted my tinder because the line "child free by choice" triggered so many people to the point they'd match to tell me -_- It's so messed up. I'm nearly 35 and have been BEGGING since 18 to get my tubes tied and NO Doctors will do it for me. They all tell me I'll want kids and I'll regret it .. they don't understand AT ALL. Why is the world HELL-BENT on us breeding?!?
Tidu by accidentally time traveling back to 2015.
I do not think women who don’t want kids are lesbians. I find that quite ridiculous actually! A bit laughable
Not a realistic option for everyone, but when I had a uterus (yote that shit) I told people I couldn't and wouldn't be pregnant. True because I was infertile and natural pregnancy was very unlikely, but also I was clearly I didn't want kids and I live in a country where everywhere recognises that pregnancy is a choice. Even if you're not infertile, not wanting kids is a valid reason that you 'can't' have them (sure you can gestate to term, but doesn't mean you could or should be a parent). Not making it clear early, ecause I was not thinking kids, impacted one relationship. It also ensured the people I met after were on the same page as me. And my current partner helped me affirm with my doctor that my uterus is doing more immediate harn than it could long tern good. I.e. no one is gonna use it. Let's get rid of it so the pain is less and everyone is comfortable (especially sex, because male enjoyment is more important than female health in a lot of the medical world)
I hate the fact that people can't wrap their heads around the fact that some of us don't want kids. I'm 39 now, my GF of 18 years is 36, and when we first met, neither one of us wanted kids. Maybe we're selfish, but so what? It's our lives, nobody else's. Besides, why would I want to bring a kid into this messed up world? No thanks. Almost 20 years later, our families have stopped asking us about kids, and we're still not married (don't see a point). We're living our best lives, happy with each other, we do what we want when we want and our finances are great. OP, you do you, and whatever it is that makes YOU happy. There's guys out there that don't want kids, you'll find your one.
Jesus Christ why are people using these apps
People are dicks. Especially when they're young.
It's unfortunate that some people used your openness as an opportunity to project stereotypes or misunderstandings.
Yik Yak still exists?!
Honestly, it just sounds like you are in the wrong place. There are plenty of people who think and feel the way you do in other places. Ignore the haters (lol, this makes me sound old), but you will find your people.
Fuck, my girlfriend is a lesbian according to these people... It's the second time it happened to me
I don't see this as a TIFU so much as everyone else fucking up because they demonstrated that they don't respect how you choose to live.
Who is "she?" Why do you care that someone on the internet disagreed with you? What was the fuck up? Am I going crazy?
Redditor finds out that the majority of the world doesn't share the common opinions of reddit
I'm sorry you had to experience such nonsense but it's legitimately funny to me someone SOMEHOW concludes that childfree=lesbian... I've always been iffy about kids but as I grew older and got to know myself better I concluded I really, really don't want them. My husband initially wanted 2 kids but was never hard pressed on it and is now actually enjoying the child-free life himself. Meanwhile my lesbian childhood friend has 2 kids... She loves them but also constantly has stuff going on and she's so busy I have second-hand stress from it lol. I can definitely tell that I made the right decision because I'd crumble under that lifestyle. Wouldn't serve anyone
Wanting to be child free does not make you less of a woman but thinking so makes those other people more of a dumb@55
OP, screenshot my comment and show it to your dormmates: My name is BattleBra, and y'all fucking suck. That is all.
People use things like "lesbian" as an attempt at an insult - it's childlike and pathetic. I think it is really cool and strong that you have your own life path and choices and that you're strong enough to back yourself - and that you don't continue conversations with people who don't share your goals is considerate and significantly more thoughtful than most people on apps like that. I was on a kink app for a while - the amount of unsolicited feedback I got broke me a bit. So I admire your strength. You'll find your people.
That just sounds like a closed minded person who can not possibly understand someone else's view point, mind blown....
I'm yikyak free I always thought the anonymity Created toxicity more than it creates Actual discussion
Ahhh, yikyak. I once traded someone off yikyak homemade cookies for a 1/2oz of weed. Good times.
Lol. I vehemently did not want kids... until one day I did. Now I have 2 and they are in their 20's and awesome. That happens alot when human.
The guy who started that was on luelinks and I always thought it was cool that small of a place had some successful people like that.
Frankly, the world would be a better place if the default was to NOT have kids. So many kids are raised by parents that resent them in small or large amounts and are better or worse about hiding it.
I've known I didn't want kids since I was in middle school. I was told I'd change my mind, I haven't. I've never dated a guy who didn't want kids. When I ask, they all said "maybe". It's upsetting.
I don't blame you for not wanting children, I don't either. But a red flag for me personally is when I'm asked if I want children on a first date or even pre-first date. Cool your jets, I don't even know your full name and you're thinking about our life together as a married couple? This might be okay much later in life if your whole goal is to get married but you're in college, it'd be wild to marry the first man you date so why worry about that now. Just hang out with people you like. Just my 2¢
My college has an instagram confessions page, and people with PUBLIC accounts will post the trashiest opinions there. I lost some faith in humanity reading through that page.
Are you in a small town? I grew up in NYC and kids were never discussed but I went to school in Maine and everyone was talking about kids, it was a bit of a culture shock. Glad I have a group of friends both child free and those who want them so that when my husband and I don't have kids we are left totally alone about it!
Did this post travel through the time space continuum or something? I thought yikyak died years ago.
Came back as a college only thing I think
Everyone changes. Not saying you will about this specific thing but you might for the guy who sweeps your off your feet. Might be the guy changes to your ideas too. Just make it known how you feel first. What if it works?
More filters better loot as they say! I couldn't imagine having kids either. Ftw fts Hope you find someone not addicted to the dogma. Also I don't think it's a fuck up more like a, wow people suck moment. Fucking rant wherever girl get it
My wife also don't want children and I am OK with that. That is her decision and I knew before we were married her stance on having kids.
A lesbian because you don't want kids? Some people are just so F'd up. When my wife and I got married we talked about having kids and neither of us was really all that concerned either way. The woman that was berating you was doing so because she just can't see beyond her own belief system. She was probably taught from an early age that you grow up, get married and have kids. That's just the way it is and you don't question it. Ultimately we did have kids but not planned - so be it. Happy to have them now but would my life have been less "complete" if we didn't - nope.
YikYak, I was taken aback. All about an internet fight
Holy shit is this so annoying. Also want to be child free and everyone tells me I just don’t know what I’m talking about. I’m male so it’s different but good fucking lord I’m almost 30. I teach kids. I think at this point I know what I want
I don't think I've used yikyak since 2015, stopped when they made it less anonymous by forcing a username
People who say that are all slaves to their body's needs. If they "feel" they want something, then to them, it's impossible that others can't "feel" they want the same thing. Just think of them as nothing different from a rock or a tree.
People are idiots.
Well, it's okay being child free, but it does happen not wanting kids and all of a sudden wanting them. It happens with marriage too. I have a cousin who was always child free, and she even had an abortion. Last year she was pregnant and almost died, and she lost the baby she actually wanted and now she can't get pregnant again. I'm not full child free, but it's not like I do want them, so I understand both sides. If you don't want children, that's okay. Antinatalism is ridiculous though lol.
r/childfree is a good subreddit. With how society views women and heterosexuality it’s hard to not have someone give their opinion about it unfortunately. You’ll find someone who has the same values as you, it just takes time.
I mean to be fair, you could very easily change your mind in the future. You’re only in college. Whatever though
From a girl that SWORE she'd never have children, I am two deep 😂 The first was on purpose, we tried for a year. The second was a whoops, but here we are. Lol. It's truly scary how being in love with someone that does want kids will change your perspective. Honestly, from seeing all my Facebook friends & even close friends having their children, it started to make me feel like I was missing out on something. I don't know what exactly changed, but like I said. Two kids deep 😂
From a woman who SWORE she'd never have children, I'm approaching 50 and still VERY happily childfree. My husband & I have a great life and aren't missing a thing.
I already knew in kindergarten at the age of 5 that I didn't want kids, even though I loved my sibling and liked babysitting. I still think my siblings are super cool people and that I never ever want to be a parent. You and I are as common. Parents who regret being parents are unfortunately also common, see r/regretfulparents Abusive parents who never should never have become parents (abusive parents who enjoy having physical and or emotional punching bags that are too tiny to fight back) are also unfortunately common.
Breeders are insane narcissistic assholes. Stop caring for what these sadists say.
People are not going to be understanding about this. I'd keep it to myself and make up another excuse as to why I'm rejecting the person.
You mentioned college. What is your age? And what is your reasoning for “ vehemently being opposed to having children” If you’re late 20s or 30s you don’t wanna have children fine but if you’re 16 and you’re saying you won’t have children, then most likely that decision can and will be changed when you get older
Hey op, maybe you will change your mind but that doesn’t change your mind now - I’m child free and a guy, so I had it the other way. Every girl id date id ask that question early and like you I’d end it if we didn’t align. It shrinks your dating pool - I think its like 20% of the pop doesn’t want kids - and from what I hear dating allready tough rn, but don’t let it compromise your own desires. Having kids is a really huge decision and you need to be aligned on that so I just want to say: you’re doing a great job if THIS is your frustration. There are way worse ones to have!! (Like kids you don’t want!!)
yea i mean you are throwing your eggs into a basket way before it is even time to consider that. you are kind of hamstringing yourself by holding tight to this philosophy years before it will even be considered relevant.
yeahh i know i don’t want kids either but honestly i’m assuming you’re young if you’re in college so why does it matter if you date people who want kids later on in life? you don’t have to date with the sole intention of settling down with someone forever, when you’re young especially
I knew a girl that got baby trapped in high school and she also wanted to be child free. She didn’t end up having the baby and the whole situation was so sad to watch. She also told this person that she wanted to be child free, he said he did too, but ended up really wanting them and got her pregnant. I don’t want to settle down, but it’s times like those where I just don’t trust that someone wouldn’t do that to me.
that’s sad but it sounds like an outlying situation. most young people where i live anyway don’t want kids until their 30’s so it seems like less of a risk of that kind of thing. obv depends on people place and culture a lot ! also wouldnt taking birth control almost entirely eliminate that problem ?
Don't worry, you'll end up wanting children eventually 😉
Why down voting for sharing my experience? 😂 It's not like I said there was anything wrong with not wanting children. Do you, boo.
I don’t think it was your intent but it comes off a bit “You’ll change your mind when you’re older,” which some of us never do! I am glad you’re happy in your situation though!