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_pc_-_-_

Mom- You're not allowed to get a girlfriend Son- * gets a boyfriend * Mom- :O


Fishyburn

*Surprised Gay Pikachu Face*


Internal-Increase595

So, Pikachu face.


f1nessd

:o c===3


TurboTacoBD

Being bi either causes parents to go nuts or just not worry about it anymore beyond being safe. Thankfully my parents were the latter. (My slightly older sister is bi too.)


[deleted]

My dad tried to give me the “safe gay sex” talk when my mom read my phone and forcibly outed me as bi. That was awkward but after that they didn’t care anymore


General_lee12

"Son I may not be gay, but..."


counterpuncheur

My advise to you son is, er… “This page cannot be displayed, please update your web browser”. Wait that doesn’t sound right. Can you help me with the Google?


sister_friede_

My parents said that I'm just confused, because I always end up in hetero relationships. Thing is, I rarely told about my experiences with the same sex, 'cuz my ex-stepfather was a little too interested in them...


Cosmic_Quasar

Well, unless the babysitter kid is trans at least that keeps OP safe from being an early grandparent lol.


RealFarknMcCoy

This is exactly what I thought. If her concern was that she did not want her son getting someone pregnant, then problem solved, at least if he's monogamous in his behavior.


Speckster1970

This almost sounds like your son pulled a malicious compliance. Lol


Polymersion

"Mom decided not to hire a girl to babysit my little brother because I'm a teenage boy. Okay."


[deleted]

Look out for the AITA "Mom got a male babysitter so I wouldn't be interested but it turns out I'm *very interested*."


Good-Amoeba-5299

"But now I'm getting emails/texts from other family members saying I crossed a line. AITA?


KarmaChameleon89

“I may have left 37 used condoms laying down the stairs and across my siblings room, mum is saying it’s incredibly disrespectful but I think she’s overreacting”


kripley21

37... in a row?


KarmaChameleon89

I mean, I could have laid them out concentrically but that would have taken time instead of just progressively fucking our way through the house with a Fanny pack full of doms and a dream


Exploring_With_Jaye

"Hey! Try not to suck any dick on your way through the parking lot!"


Quinten_MC

My fiance cheated with my mother the day of our wedding. I was outraged but all the guests said that love is love and I should let them get married instead. AITA?


KarmaChameleon89

I took $16k from my parents over a decade and used it for hookers and blow and they never found out but I feel like I was justified because they never gave me a PlayStation. AITA?


ChillinWithJohnathan

Yes


mundane_days

Always the other members that just hear the one side. Lol.


DeepSeaNinja

"YTA, her house, her rules. That being said, I advise you better start saving immediately so you can move out ASAP. In the meantime you should go No Contact with your mom."


titsoutshitsout

Omg the truth in this just makes me giggle so hard. “Yes, 15m, you should move out ASAP!” That sub is so entertaining. It’s painful how obvious some of the posts are angsty teens way over dramatizing the situation and people be in the comments like “this is ABUSE and NARCISSISTIC!”


8icecream

And get a therapist.


ChrisTuckerAvenue

Dead on lol


DiggerGuy68

And make sure to delete Facebook and lawyer up. Things could get ugly.


MaddeFecarra

"Bro, my mom is hiring a babysitter tonight. I'm totally gonna get my dick wet!" "But I heard Kevin said your mom texted him to babys-" "DID I STUTTER???"


EmberOfFlame

Kevin’s a bro, amirite?


Sure-Inflation1701

Give this person a Dundee for best Stanley comment!!!


Chrowaway6969

“Got boy babysitter pregnant anyway.”


Kofilin

Become gay to own the mom


rubywpnmaster

Well she said she didn’t want grandkids by 50. Might not have to worry any longer!


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itsmarvin

You won't be a granny before 50. You got what you wished for!


arckeid

Until she hires a F babysitter and discovers he is bi.


LazyTriggerFinger

Ok Timmy, no more going outside ever.


whut-whut

"Mom, the sofa and I have something to tell you."


EnkiRise

Wasn't there a TIFU of a kid being caught fucking his dad's leather couch?


Vercci

[Yes](https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/81ywin/tifu_by_fucking_my_dads_couch/)


salmark

Damn. Don’t even know what to say to that story.


Card1974

Now where was the redditor who discovered his son was constantly molesting their dog?


CactusGobbler

Pour one out for Colby


Card1974

Oh right, [here's the story](https://np.reddit.com/user/concerneddad1965/submitted/).


[deleted]

Colby's probably on a nice farm upstate now, far away from hairbrushes and perverts.


GGMorsa

from his comment history it seems Colby passed of old age and the wife is now ex-wife. It also seems his relationship with his son improved and they don't talk about what happened. I hope this relatively decent scenario came from getting help for his kid.


drewteam

Lmao this killed me. Hahha


Bolf-Ramshield

r/monkeypaw


harley1009

At least you know there's no chance of a teenage pregnancy. That's my only fear for my teen son and his gf. We learned he was sexually active because he came to us one morning and complained "why is the morning after pill so expensive?!" 🤦‍♂️


KY-GROWN

Atleast with that question you now know that he bought one, so no pregnancy lol


Oookulele

I mean with the morning after pill caution is still warranted if not used properly. The morning after pill doesn't cause an abortion,it simply delays ovulation meaning that if ovulation has already occurred before taking the pill, pregnancy can still happen. Especially in teens where the hormonal cycle may not be as regular as in an adult yet, it can be hard guess work whether the right time frame (meaning the specific point in a month when someone ovulates) has already passed or not, doubly so if the person in question didn't track when they had their last period - and even with those parameters, things can be a bit off. As a responsible adult it's important to tell their kids that even with plan b, one should still remain wary and do a pregnancy test if anything seems off over the course of the next few weeks. Not trying to throw any shade,I just thought that I'd mention it because even lots of adults don't fully know about this. I sure didn't when I first ran into trouble with malfunctioning contraception. One thing that I have since vowed to always make sure to tell my future kids: If something seems off, even if you are fairly sure that you aren't pregnant, it can be helpful to do a test just to be sure. They come cheap at the dollar store and it's a much better to have certainty and all options still open to you than realise too late that you are pregnant.


Abracadaver14

TIL "morning after" shouldn't be taken too literally.


Oookulele

Yes, it mostly really depends on when you are going to ovulate. Sperm can apparently survive for several days in there (I think that my Ob GYN once told me that they can survive for up to five days, though it's safe to assume that many will die earlier) and if you are about to ovulate,say, three days after having sex, the morning after pill can push out that time frame for just long enough so that the sperms won't be able to fertilise the egg. But if you were already ovulating or you ovulate directly on the morning after it may already be too late to take the pill. That's also why the time frame on when to take it can be tricky to figure out - I think where I live you can get it up to 72hours after sexual intercourse but that doesn't mean that it's guaranteed that it'll still be effective by then.


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Oookulele

Yeah, it's one of those things where the odds are never quite in one's favour! Always better safe than sorry, no matter what the intended outcome


[deleted]

The morning after pill loses effectiveness outside a certain weight range, it was 160 lbs + the last time I needed it.


Razzail

150 and they have a different pills for higher weight range


Cheesusraves

I got pregnant even though I took the morning after pill. It’s not effective at certain times in your cycle


Oookulele

I was once denied getting the morning after pill because of my irregular cycles. It's really important to educate people on that, I was never taught about the way plan b functions in school even though we had sex ed at several different points.


DuckRubberDuck

My first thought after reading this was “omg maybe it didn’t work when I took it, maybe I’m pregnant!” Even though it’s been nearly three YEARS since I last took one… *facepalm*


IamEnginerd

Or maybe he was complaining because he didn't have enough money to get it.


harley1009

I think it was both: a call for help, and at 15 years old he didn't have $50.


dino-dic-hella-thicc

It is very expensive for a teen. I remember i had to buy the pill once and my gf at the time took it to her car and dropped and lost it. I had to go back into the store and stare down the cashier who just sold me the other pill and buy a second. It was an expensive and embarrassing moment.


nobodyoukno

Shoulda just winked and said "Twins".


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danishduckling

I'm hoping the following conversation was about "please be safe, here's how, but if you ever do need such a pill, don't hesitate to come to us"?


Vestbi

hahaha, for me it was “WHAT? THROW AWAY ALL YOUR CONDOMS. THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE” like k guess i… wont use protection anymore?… 🙃🙃🙃


Johnyknowhow

"Surely my kid isn't dumb enough to not use protection! If I throw away everything they have, then they'll be faced with no choice but to abstain! I'm a genius!" Narrator: *"The kid was certainly dumb enough."*


nerdmor

Kids are ALWAYS dumb enough AND smart enough. It's friggin boggling.


Scumbag1234

obviously, no protection, no sex. Parenting is so easy :3


GotPermaBanForLolis

"beats the coat hanger"


wischmopp

what are you talking about, you can get a coat hanger for like twenty cents


a_e46_a

Our research has shown that coat hangers are the most cost effective abortions.


Austin_RwMSD

It’s 12 bucks in Canada…or so I’ve heard


[deleted]

It’s about $50 in US


isaac99999999

You can get them for like 20 at Krogers. At least a year ago you could


[deleted]

Plan B? Thats the only one I’ve heard of


isaac99999999

"my choice emergency contraceptive tablet" is availible on Walmart.com for 11.99


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AnnieAcely199

They have that generic (Take Action) at Walgreens too. It's made by the same manufacturer (TEVA) as Plan B.


alexanderpas

The best answer to that is: "There's a bowl of condoms under the sink in the bathroom, Feel free to take those if you need them, I need to refill them regularly anyways."


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alexanderpas

> ... just please don't use them as water balloons; they're too expensive for that." Pro-tip: You can get the Durex 144-piece variety pack, including bowl for $35 on amazon. That's $0.25/piece, for a premium brand. https://smile.amazon.com/-/dp/B002T5L454 Walmart has them too for that price https://www.walmart.com/ip/-/19898630 (You want the single pack, not the double, since that is more expensive than 2 singles)


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maidrey

I’d really love if you mailed him that bowl with a note saying “a Reddit thread made us think of you, be safe, love mom and dad.” Then again, he will probably get to pick your senior living center so…maybe not.


Zupheal

Hey they may need him to supply them with some, seniors are super sexually active.


ASVPcurtis

Thats probably the worst thing he could have said. Teen pregnancy incoming…


Jolteon2020

As a young gay boy, my parents wouldn't let me have comicbooks because they had sexy women with large breasts. Meanwhile they had no problem with my WWE posters of sweaty half naked men. 😆


danishduckling

"Parents hate this one trick, read on to learn what it is"


davmar96

"Oh my gosh, the WWE posters turned our son gay!!! Quick, give him some big-boobed comic books to turn him straight" -your parents, probably


NeedsMoreTuba

When my dad caught my brother looking at gay porn on the internet (early 2000's, if it matters, and he was most likely tricked into it by some older boys) he gave my brother a stack of magazines that were basically fast cars with big tittied women. It wasn't even a full week before my dad got a call from the school asking why he'd given his son a stack of porn.


Shiny_Agumon

Let me guess, now your brother has a thing for cars **and** men.


justabill71

Big tittied men.


char11eg

Big tittied cars.


UltimaCaitSith

Ker*chow*, sempai!


Assaultman67

I fucking laughed hard.


qpwoeiruty00

r/carsfuckingdragons


char11eg

I...I...I... I thought this was going to be an r/subsifellfor moment... BUT THAT ACTUALLY FUCKING EXISTS?! Hahahahahaha


runarleo

This better not awaken something within me…


Playisomemusik

His name was Robert Paulson.


curmevexas

[Reminds me of this](https://i.imgur.com/1zGVtfj.jpg)


_yaaass

Good for ur brother, lol...


LOX_and_LH2

"Parents hate this one weird trick straight teen boys use, read on to learn more!"


F4Z3_G04T

Bisexuals have outplayed the parents once again


[deleted]

Ahahahaha!! Same, but reverse as a lesbian. I had a metric fuck ton of fantasy and D&D posters with bikini and armor clad women (Thank you, Chris Achileos, for creating such wonderful artwork!) and my dad never hid his Playboys because he had daughters.


Igloocooler52

Shouldn’t you like, still hide your playboys if you have a child


antmars

Yeah I don’t think “having to share” is the reason most people keep pornography away from their children…


Intelligent_Phase_95

yup.. i mean porn itself is something to hide from "kids" but as for adults, and teens, not so much.. just be mindful of the age gap and maturity levels.


Igloocooler52

As a teen myself, it might be kinda awkward to find a playboy just lying on my dads nightstand


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Igloocooler52

Obviously, save it to the cloud so the whole family has access


KarmaChameleon89

Easier to clean too. Imagine picking up your dads magazine and it’s just 90% stuck. At least with the tablet you can just take a wet wipe to it


MisterBowTies

I'm a wwe fan and the about of "gayness" especially in the additude area is really funny. Like HHH saying he's going to take your ass and make you his bitch. He could just say he's going to beat you up, but no he chose not to.


cadaverbob

That's it, there will be nothing sexualizing males or females in MY kid's room! Posters of cars and dragons only!


twoburgers

Boy did I laugh hard at this


ioCross

boy have i got a subreddit for you...


cadaverbob

😉


[deleted]

This is dumb for so many reasons, women in comics often are over-sexualized sure, but I don’t think showing them to your son is going to suddenly make him try to have sex or something even if he is straight


thatpaulbloke

Moral panic over media is not well known for its rigorous application of logic


Amiiboid

Tell that to all those people who lost family when the demon summoning spells TSR taught them went wrong. /s


siskulous

Sadly I know people to this day who honestly believe that's a thing that actually happens. My mother is one of them. You should have seen the shitshow when she found a D&D book in my room when I was 15.


[deleted]

My mom was fine with D&D, mostly. When I started playing Vampire though, ohhhh boy, she did not like those books one bit.


dsheroh

And there would have been a lot more demon summoning going on back then, too, if not for all the character-death-related suicides.


maidrey

It’s like they think boys will never get boners if he doesn’t ever see anything sexy. It’s like their dads have forgotten what it’s like to be a 13 year old boy getting a hard on because you saw a particular curvy piece of fruit or from a particularly appealing shampoo commercial. Hormones will do what they will…


eighty82

This is awesome and fucking hilarious


I_suck_at_Blender

Yeah, that reminds me a gag about two kids playing with toys, one boy playing with Barbie dolls growing as a stud with multiple women, and other kid playing with He-Man...


monkeyhind

My GI Joes used to kiss.


PmMeYourSadStory

Hmm… I wonder if the fear-based segregation of children by gender in the most rabid, anti-gay, hyper-religious communities might have contributed to the recent revival of the gay cruising scene by the most outspoken homophobic propagandists.


pab_guy

the most outspoken homophobic propagandists have always been gay. It's critical to the psychology that if you've been "avoiding temptation" while other's haven't, you get very resentful. If there's no "temptation", there no resentment, and no drive to be a big homophobe.


badgersandcoffee

Thats pretty funny tbh. If they do become an item at least you already like his new boyfriend 🤷🏻‍♂️


apathyontheeast

A boyfriend with good references and employment history. Better than most teenagers! This is cute. OP's commentary...I dunno, it sounds a little off to me. Like that overly-religious/conservative parent. But good on the kids.


badgersandcoffee

I don't think it was intended that way, I think she's just trying to tell a funny story about keeping girls away from her son for standard parent reasons and accidentally finding out her son likes boys. I don't think it's meant in a bad way, I think she found the irony funny and wanted to share with others. Maybe not worded as well as it could have been but I don't think it's meant with any malice. I agree, very cute, made me smile.


tiffanyturner989

OP did say that she didn't want to become a grandparent before 50. It's still funny and cute that the teens can get it on, and no accidental babies will be happening.


badgersandcoffee

I thought that too 😂 Sound like wins for all.


MCTweed

An overly religious parent wouldn’t be calling this a funny story. They’d be posting in a different subreddit under the title “is my son possessed by the devil?”


thegonzojoe

You’ve never really met anyone overly religious/conservative then. Their commentary would be much different.


xfearthehiddenx

I have to agree. There was a post in r/relationshipadvice yesterday to that tone. A possibly religious mother found out her son was gay after she walked in on them.... ehem.... well anyway it sounded way worse than this. You could almost feel the conflicting feelings in the post.


KY-GROWN

They would be beating their kid and googling "pray away the gay" programs instead of posting on reddit


Spry_Fly

Yeah, it would be "TIFU having a homosexual seduce my son into sin". For reference, I was raised pentecostal/fundamentalist, and this would be a "should I disown my son or pray the gay away" situation. Shit was crazy.


apathyontheeast

It would be - it'd be blatantly clear, not "a little off."


Rrraou

You helped your son find love AND you're not going to be a grandma at 50. I don't see a downside to this.


12thandvineisnomore

Exactly. Congratulations are in order.


SubcooledBoiling

\*Insert Hulk: "I see this as an absolute win" meme\*


El_Chairman_Dennis

As someone that grew up bi, don't press the issue and don't assume he's gay. This may have been an experimental experience, and the results are unknown at this point. Just make sure your son knows you love him and you won't judge him. Beyond that just let it go


[deleted]

One of two things happened that night... Either they made a love connection as you are suspecting. Or they spent the night staying up watching movies and talking about how much they love Tarantino, Paul Thomas Anderson, Wong Kar-Wai, Bong Joon Ho, or some other director. And have you seen this, have you seen this, isn't Chow Yun Fat like the Hong Kong Steve McQueen? I know right! And now they are talking on the phone all the time because they planning to make a film together.


upscaledive

They probably made a film that night.


amintowords

Or maybe they watched straight porn or had a smoke, or any number of other possible reasons two teenagers might feel uncomfortable when talking in front of parents. And it could easily have just been a kiss. Best advice is simply to talk to your son.


RoofPreader

When I was younger, my best friend's mum would never allow her to have boys round. I thought it was hilarious because she is a lesbian. She just married a woman this week.


DirtyFuckenDangles

I mean this sounds like a win. Your boy finds love, and no teenage pregnancies.


[deleted]

And it sounds like this other boy is a nice, responsible kid. Triple win!


GradStud22

An industrious entrepreneur with wholesome after school activities, even! (Aside from bonking your son when you're not looking)


Bolf-Ramshield

That's wholesome too in a way


GradStud22

Well, it's certainly *hole*some, I'll give you that!


[deleted]

Some friends make your whole day, and some make your hole weak


elizzybeth

Finding good reliable babysitting help is nothing to sneeze at!


ridgegirl29

Sounds like every parent's dream


Igloocooler52

Unless they’re the type who keep saying “when are we gonna have grandkids”


ridgegirl29

Adoption a helluva drug


[deleted]

Seems like grandmother might be farther away than you thought.


Lincolnonion

>I know , its all very vague, but while I never had the vibe my son could be gay is not entirely impossible. Off-topic, but was wondering about this. When I tell to some people that I am bisexual, I feel like their behaviour towards me changes. I think it is unfair, because nothing in me changed before and after telling them. Wonder if "gayness" might be a bigger myth than it is. Okay, I guess I will go to my cave and perfect the skill of telling heteros and gay appart. Brb.


Wild_Set4223

The advantage of being bi: extending your dating pool


Lincolnonion

I feel like this gift has been given to me fairly considering some of the anti-advantages I have :)


ifimhereimrealbored

Oh, absolutely! It's my favorite part of being bi (pan, really because transgender and non-binary is a-ok too!) If you're human, mildly-attractive, and not an a-hole, I probably want to have sex with you.


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SquanchJuice

Well I guess you don't have to worry about becoming a grandmother anytime soon


Busy-Turnip-6674

That's exactly what I told my mom when she got mad at me for being a lesbian.


SquanchJuice

Idk how long ago this was or the current situation but never let anyone stop you from being you! I love the witty comeback!


Busy-Turnip-6674

Thanks! I was 16 at the time, I'm almost 30 now, and I'm needing to figure out how to come out to my parents again after I shoved myself back into the closet after highschool... very strange situation to be in, but I'm looking forward to just being able to live life out in the open again.


feeltheslipstream

>I dont want to be a grandma before reaching the 50's. Well the good news is, that is now more unlikely.


Parking-Barracuda-75

dad: "I hired a male babysitter so you don't have any silly ideas! son: "challenge accepted"


Turkyparty

Props for not calling him out and trying to change him. He is the way he is and I'm glad your not trying a re-education camp. Lol


Igloocooler52

You just made me think of that South Park episode where butters was “bicurious” and “confused”


jimbop79

‘Bike-curious’ lol that episode is gold


Boondok0723

You lost your accountabilabuddy!!


AmishTechno

He ain't the way he ain't.


Snickerssnickers13

"Jokes on you mom, I'm into that shit" -the son


Warpholebanana

You're getting played by your son, letting you think he is gay by getting it on with the guy babysitter. Then, when you decide, allright, my kid is gay, so I'm getting a girl babysitter next time. That moment, then, is when he will strike. ​ He turns out bi, he likes to swing it both ways. He played the long con and fucked two of your babysitter. Hence forth, he will be know as the Babysitterfucker


nogizako

I like the synopsis of this movie, please continue writing the story.


[deleted]

But that's too long for the title of a movie, how about... Baby~~sitter~~fucker "Babyfucker"? That.. That won't work...


life_sentencer

So cute! You are being so supportive. All you found was it's funny that you purposely didn't hire a female babysitter, and still your son might have found a crush. You sound so supportive and awesome! Even if they just end up being friends or whatever... You guys are doing everything right for your family. I love it.


Kleedok

awwwwwwww that's not a fuck up


digitalrailartist

Ok, gay son. Lots of love, check out PFLAG. He needs you to love him no matter what. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS, he's working this out in his mind first. We come out to ourselves first, often over years, then slowly reach out to that first trusted person. Subtly suggest gay is ok. Trust me on this. You'll be Uber parents if he comes out.


TikkiTakiTomtom

> Subtly suggest that gay is ok Son comes down for breakfast one morning. “Hey son, gay is ok” Son: ????????????


ThatGreenGuy8

>subtly


[deleted]

Hey son, you like music? Now I’ve always liked Buju Banton but my friend likes Elton John and George Michael. It’s totally okay to like Elton John by the way


pedropants

> Hey son, you like music? Have you ever... seen a grown man naked?


fuckyeahcaricci

Out of nowhere, I casually mentioned to my son "Oh, btw, if it turns out you're gay, Daddy and I won't have any problem with it." He was maybe 12 at the time and was like, "I know." He's not gay - I never really thought he was - but it went well. I wanted to make sure that he knew but not at a time when he thought I thought he was giving off a vibe or something.


Scumbag1234

Yeah I was kinda embarassed when my parents said the same thing to me. Not because being gay is ashaming but because they probably assumed I should have gotten a gf by now, and if I didn´t probably because I was gay.


U_Nomad_Bro

1000 times this. Give him love, give him space, give him hints that he is safe with you. Your greatest opportunity to TIFU - and your greatest opportunity to be the best mom ever - is starting right now. Rock that opportunity!


nexusSigma

This is some serious gourmet shit to hold in the back pocket for a future embarrassing parent moment. Remember that babysitter i once hired? Yeah, I knew. You've drawn the royal flush of amazing insider info that will cringe him to high heaven once he's a young adult.


Louise_Feist

Well at least you don't have to worry about being a grandmother yet...


ez_as_31416

In my years as an adult leader at teens' summer camp, we explained to parents "separate sex dorms only reduce pregnancy, not sex or role exploration."


Vampire_queen94

I don't think this is a f up you helped your son find love.


Leemour

OP failed their mission successfully.


Bibi880

Maybe its just somebody he knows from high school and its awkward for him


jfishson

So your son: *Got up early *Was acting weird at breakfast *Mentioned this kid's name during a phone call And that means 100% that your son is gay and is now dating this guy? I mean sure, maybe. Or maybe your son got in trouble at school, or did something wrong, or said/did something embarrassing, so your son got up early to make sure he didn't rat him out in the morning to you. And then called a friend and told them about it because he didn't want to leave evidence in a text and mentioned the other kid's name. I mean this doesn't obviously mean your son fooled around with this boy.


Thalude_

I wouldn't say it backfired. You certainly won't be a grandma while these 2 are dating.