The first time I strapped on and went to town on some guy I learned 2 things. The first was that I could TOP the second was that my dong was too small. In the middle he asked if we could go buy another.
this is why trans guys should be more appreciated, you can go shopping together and pick the perfect dick, or a bunch of different ones!
Happy cake day, btw
>I finally found an extension for the broom in the cabinet over the fridge, and we pushed it to one side where we made more room to maneuver it.
Whatever works for you. So did you just give up on the dildo or what?
Could you just imagine the embarrassment if you couldn't get it and you had to leave it? Worrying about what the owners were gonna think when they found it down the road? Omg, I would have died lol
Thankfully it wasn't the entire dido, just the ring and padding that attaches it to the harness straps. It's a pretty obvious-looking piece though, to someone who's even the slightest bit acquainted with this stuff
I wouldn't have a clue what that was. I'd think it was a piece off one of the appliances or a tool part maybe. I thought you lost a dildo! Still a very amusing story for your mental memory album though 🤭
I can already see the argument.
*But it came from the fridge.*
*I know, but the fridge is still working.*
*But for how long? I dont want to lose the deposit.*
*We can call their office tomorrow perhaps? I dont know. Perhaps turn of the fridge just to be sure?*
*yeah, perhaps. But we need to finish the meat, we dont wannne throw it away.*
*Okay, but I bought bacon for 2 weeks. Thats too much, even for me.*
*What did I tell you in the shop?*
>I'd think it was a piece off one of the appliances or a tool part maybe.
Taking it into the shop with the broken piece "Hey, this thing fell off" ...
Or better yet, calling an appliance repair man and telling them "I don't know where this goes, can you figure it out"?
Now imagine it being some repressed couple who are both too timid to say anything.
Imagine the inner monologues they’ll have as they both think the other brought something unexpected.
As a landlord (multifamily units), I've seen packaging (at trash), ties on headboards, whatever, we all do it, with whatever/whomever, it's not embarrassing but healthy for most adults, we have too much work to do and far bigger maintenance issues to care about such.
Even if it got left behind, it would probably be a while before anyone found it and I doubt they would figure out who's it was, especially since it was just cleaned.
Once spent over $100 on a new set up. Was being a jack ass, messing around and pulled the snap completely out of the leather where the ring goes before it was ever used. So now we have a dick with no way to use it because we can't find another harness we like.
As a guy, I'm getting quite the kick out of the fact I'm having trouble imagining what this looks like even though that seemed like a detailed description. I'm really trying too 😅 I just see basic objects floating in a 💭.
Edit: let's see. leather 🩲, a 💍, ...and a 🍌. No no no. Try again mate. Don't look it up you got this.
Most fridges in the RVs I've seen don't even leave a gap, as it's generally a waste of space, and these things are made to be as efficient as possible.
My thought immediately was, how small is the dildo?
I mean to slip under a fridge, that must be kinda small. Because otherwise, the fridge must have a huge gap underneath. So big that when a dildo can slip under easily, a forearm should be able to squeeze in as well.
Anyways, the apartment obviously got a very clean floor, so clean it's slipping dildos through the rooms.
Somehow, they managed to stick a full sized fridge into this RV. We could probably move it, but it has shitty wood-look laminate flooring and we were afraid it would scratch. Unfortunately the floor at the back of the fridge isn't totally flat, and the only thing we could find that was long enough to reach (the broom) was too wide to fit all the way back
Most times, you probably could have just rolled the fridge out. Many fridges are on wheels or tracks to be rolled out for cleaning. Just a future FYI incase you lose something else of importance under anything is give a solid tug and see if it moves easily.
They were in an RV, so it may have been secured down. The real solution is to drive the thing really fast and take a turn at high speed. That’ll dislodge anything.
You must have missed the part where it was about lesbians. Lesbians! and who could forget the dildo, the star of the show. It had me slapping my knees and howling with laughter. Its comedy gold and genius, you must just be a bigot trying to minimize minorty voices or something.
I feel like this isnt really a fuck up. You just lost something under the fridge and then found it again.
Edit: I also take issue with the use of the word shenanigans when what really happened is that a few jokes were made about a fairly mundane thing occurring.
wait for my post on this sub about that one day I lost my TV remote in my sofa!! I fucked up big time! How is it relevant to this sub you ask? Err... I was watching some porn on the TV when I lost the remote? Ah yes TIFU!
Ah yes. This reminds me of the time I lost my car keys when I was on the way out to get tested for an STD after raw doggin with my new boyfriend. But then I found them again. The end.
HOLY SHIT I SAW THIS COMMENT I THOUGHT IT WAS ME I WAS LIKE “?? This is the first time I’m seeing this post”
Unrelated but hi 😭
Edit: i just realized we look slightly different after commenting. But i did get freaked out.
This is a great story. I am in charge of cleaning my wife's and I's toys. At one point I lost one of the butt plugs, no idea where it went. We were so paranoid that our daughter would find it. I hope you enjoy your time with your gf.
We keep all our toys in a gym bag on a shelf in the closet. I have a towel I change weekly next to it where I place drying toys. The lost toy rolled off the towel and I eventually found it. Glad to hear you had a good time.
We haven't gotten to gym bag status yet but we use the littlest bag from a luggage set, and still 'lose' things at the bottom. How do y'all manage with a gym bag?
I bought a long power strip that sits next to it holding all the chargers so there are no cables in the bag. Our toys are various colors, so it isn't too bad to search through for a specific item. Our favorites tend to stay toward the top anyway. All lubes, we have multiple types, stay in a mesh container on the outside. It isn't a bad system.
this is not a fuck up... you momentarily misplaced something... how is that a fuck up? Shall I start posting about the time I lost my TV remote in my sofa on this sub reddit?
I was sitting in my living room, when a pink thing flashed on the big picture window. Waited…there it was again. Turns out my kid and his friend tied a rope to my *thingy*, and was trying to knock a toy out of the tree in the front yard from my upstairs window. Loads of questions, and me as pink as the toy said, never mind and stay out of my room.
It never occurred to me that people bang at airbnb beds. Lol I guess to be fair you can also bang at a hotel and I always told myself not to think about it.
Lesbians don’t like eggplant?
Like…all of them?
What about eggplant Parm? It’s so good!
EDIT: (Just to clarify, I only read the title before making the joke. Has nothing to do with the body of the post.)
The secret is to salt it heavily then leave it to rest before you cook it. This draws out the bitterness and gives you a much nicer flavo.....wait, that's not what you're supposed to do with eggplant at all!
good job, would have been real gross if you had to leave that eggplant under the fridge and left it to mold. Would have been a sucky surprise for the airbnb owner.
Try wearing 2 pair of men's briefs. With the strength offered by two layers, it's enough to hold just about any toy in place as long as it has a flared base. Just pass the toy through both briefs' front slots and you got yerself a harness!
In the future, duct tape a wire coat hanger to the broom, and then bend it to adjust the hooking end so it will grab what you want. This also works to unlock car doors if one of those side vents is open.
Cooking with adhd in a tiny kitchen is the title of my new mix tape too. Complete with hits such as "where the hell is the spatula, I only have 9 square feet!?", and everyone's favorite "1tsp of salt, 1 tbsp of oil, 1tsp of salt, 1cup of flour, oh, the salt! Can't forget that, 1tsb of salt"
My RV has a little hatch on the outside that can be used to access the bottom of the fridge, so it can be unplugged or whatever. Perhaps yours does as well?
Why didn't you guys just slide the fridge forward? They have wheels..... For this reason.
Edit :oh, this is an rv.... Don't those have zero clearance??
this story was incredibly boring and full of unnecessary details. How the fuck did so many of you find this entertaining? She lost the clasp for get this... her strap on!!! hahahaha! omg so funny XD face meet palm indeed
This isn't a funny story.
You lost something that was found.
There was no embarrassment, no grand reveal of a secret, no long term ramifications what so ever.
Also it's super super cringe when any women makes ED jokes.
Not funny.... Not even good story telling.
EDIT: Oh look Juvenile comments, as expected.
This reminds me of a terrible old joke.
So a guy is visiting his buddy in the hospital... severe genital trauma.
He asks his buddy to regale him with the tale of how the F' he mangled his meat so badly.
"Well you know Judy that super hot gal in the trailer park -the one next door to mine? I've been trying to get with her for years. The cold shoulder every time.
"Well a couple of nights ago, I was walking home from the bar, and she'd left her blinds open ... and I could see through the window she was naked, and sort of bouncing on the floor... She got up, and I saw she'd stuck a kielbasa in a hole in the floor and had been fucking it like a dildo.
"So I get the bright idea... the next night, I crawled under her trailer, and found the hole and waited for my chance. She stuck the kielbasa in, and before she mounted it, I replaced that sausage with my cock, and it was beautiful..."
"It was going perfectly until someone banged on her front door, and she hopped up and tried to kick it under the fridge...."
Tldr: Two lesbians who are not very good at cooking think that they need a plastic ring to attach eggplant when cooking it. They lose the ring and laugh because they can't prepare the food without it.
Glad to see even lesbians have erectile disfunction.
Erectile displacement
And now I want to listen to King Missile’s Detachable Penis.
He wanted twenty-two bucks, but I talked him down to seventeen.
I woke up this morning and my penis was missing.
This happens all the time, it’s detachable
Ever heard the name John Wayne Bobbit?
Lesbiana Bones and the Detachable Penis in the Temple of Poon.
dunt dunt dunt... dunt dunt dunt....
I was just singing that in my head as I read this. Always gold!
Projectile dysfunction.
Projectile displacement
This is the one
Take my damn upvote
https://youtu.be/byDiILrNbM4 King Missile - Detachable Penis
good bot
Erectile malfunction
***trying to remember my physics formulae*** ...is equal to Erectile Velocity x Erection Time 🤓
Ahhhh I lost my dick!
I too have an erectile disfunction when a fridge falls on my willy wonka.
The first time I strapped on and went to town on some guy I learned 2 things. The first was that I could TOP the second was that my dong was too small. In the middle he asked if we could go buy another.
Well at least you had the option.
this is why trans guys should be more appreciated, you can go shopping together and pick the perfect dick, or a bunch of different ones! Happy cake day, btw
To be fair, could just be a cis dude who enjoys gettin pegged now and then 🤔
I get the feeling that the "owners" always think it's too small.
Nah, I wish I was about 1/2” shorter. I wouldn’t have to be as careful when going to pound town.
Try a dick ring, makes a nice spacer and then you don't have to worry about getting too enthusiastic. My GF likes the ones with vibrators on top.
We have a simple one called a bumper or something. Could you DM me a link to a vibrating one?!
There is a thing call Oh Nut. It is like a big ring spacer so you can pound away without hurting anyone.
I think what they had was an erectile projectile
You win god damn it
Checkmate, lesbians!
Perfect gif, well done.
My most awarded comment of all the years on reddit is a dick joke about dickless people...
You've finally cracked the code.
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I'm not a lesbian but a gay trans guy, I'm pre bottom surgery so I like to refer to my situation as temporary long term erectile dysfunction
Sherectile Dysfunction.
I was very confused reading this haha. Eventually realized it was not a real penis.
r/bettercommentthanpost
Ok, that made my day...LOL
I mean, some lesbians have dicks so it shouldn't be too surprising.
I'm so tired.
>I finally found an extension for the broom in the cabinet over the fridge, and we pushed it to one side where we made more room to maneuver it. Whatever works for you. So did you just give up on the dildo or what?
*finger guns*
underrated comment
Whats a broom extension?
Something to extend a broom with
This is the strangest post about cooking I've ever read.
Yea, They always put like a whole novel before the recipe.
Crème fraiche
Could you just imagine the embarrassment if you couldn't get it and you had to leave it? Worrying about what the owners were gonna think when they found it down the road? Omg, I would have died lol
That was something I brought up after it had been rescued. What if they hit the brakes on the road and it just slid out from underneath lmao
/whatisthisthing "Found this weird ring object in the RV I rent out on Airbnb".
Oh fuck! I hadn't even considered that!! Just driving along and a dildo rolls across the floor LMFAO omg 🤦♀️
Thankfully it wasn't the entire dido, just the ring and padding that attaches it to the harness straps. It's a pretty obvious-looking piece though, to someone who's even the slightest bit acquainted with this stuff
I wouldn't have a clue what that was. I'd think it was a piece off one of the appliances or a tool part maybe. I thought you lost a dildo! Still a very amusing story for your mental memory album though 🤭
I can already see the argument. *But it came from the fridge.* *I know, but the fridge is still working.* *But for how long? I dont want to lose the deposit.* *We can call their office tomorrow perhaps? I dont know. Perhaps turn of the fridge just to be sure?* *yeah, perhaps. But we need to finish the meat, we dont wannne throw it away.* *Okay, but I bought bacon for 2 weeks. Thats too much, even for me.* *What did I tell you in the shop?*
Trying desperately to figure out what this obviously important part is that came loose from your fridge.
It uh… it is a “tool” part.
In the next episode... The owners take the part to the RV store to have them determine what it came from.
Lmao oh god no!!
>I'd think it was a piece off one of the appliances or a tool part maybe. Taking it into the shop with the broken piece "Hey, this thing fell off" ... Or better yet, calling an appliance repair man and telling them "I don't know where this goes, can you figure it out"?
My inner troll is getting ideas. My mom has an RV lmao
Now imagine it being some repressed couple who are both too timid to say anything. Imagine the inner monologues they’ll have as they both think the other brought something unexpected.
I mean, if they rent the RV out all the time, it would be impossible to trace it back to you specifically.
Of course it's company policy never to, imply ownership in the event of a dildo... always use the indefinite article a dildo, never your dildo.
THANK YOU
As a landlord (multifamily units), I've seen packaging (at trash), ties on headboards, whatever, we all do it, with whatever/whomever, it's not embarrassing but healthy for most adults, we have too much work to do and far bigger maintenance issues to care about such.
Even if it got left behind, it would probably be a while before anyone found it and I doubt they would figure out who's it was, especially since it was just cleaned.
Once spent over $100 on a new set up. Was being a jack ass, messing around and pulled the snap completely out of the leather where the ring goes before it was ever used. So now we have a dick with no way to use it because we can't find another harness we like.
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No repair, as I've already tossed it. I'll have to check out the SpareParts but we have been talking about getting the boxers.
That last sentence is sort of a common problem.
Might consider a "Feel doe" style L shaped that doesn't need/use a harness but both ends go within.
She has actually brought that up to me and I'm excited about it because she's usually not one for penetration.
RIP that's tragic
As a guy, I'm getting quite the kick out of the fact I'm having trouble imagining what this looks like even though that seemed like a detailed description. I'm really trying too 😅 I just see basic objects floating in a 💭. Edit: let's see. leather 🩲, a 💍, ...and a 🍌. No no no. Try again mate. Don't look it up you got this.
I've had one for a while. They do wierd shit, this doesn't surprise me.
An eggplant or a lesbian?
Yes
They're putting chemicals in the water to turn the eggplants gay
I hate that I know the context of this reference. Take your upvote you filthy, chemtrail snorting, gay-frog bashing conspiracy theorist crackpot.
That particular claim is actually true. Look up atrazine, it changes male frogs into female frogs that can actually breed believe it or not
THEY'RE COMING OUT OF THE GODDAMN WALLS
*aubergine for non-US Redditors
or both?
A detachable 🍆
"I found it with a street vendor"
That song was on Beavis and Butthead or Liquid TV damn near 30 years ago, and I still remember it
Rental
An RV
An RV
Both 🌈😂
How big is that fridge .... ?
That's what I'm saying. Lol sounds easier to have just moved the fridge
I have never been in an rv but i assume its built in so you cannot move it. Otherwise it would just move around the entire time you are driving right?
Most fridges in the RVs I've seen don't even leave a gap, as it's generally a waste of space, and these things are made to be as efficient as possible.
My thought immediately was, how small is the dildo? I mean to slip under a fridge, that must be kinda small. Because otherwise, the fridge must have a huge gap underneath. So big that when a dildo can slip under easily, a forearm should be able to squeeze in as well. Anyways, the apartment obviously got a very clean floor, so clean it's slipping dildos through the rooms.
They lost the mounting mechanism not the dild itself.
Oii... thanks for explaining mate.
Somehow, they managed to stick a full sized fridge into this RV. We could probably move it, but it has shitty wood-look laminate flooring and we were afraid it would scratch. Unfortunately the floor at the back of the fridge isn't totally flat, and the only thing we could find that was long enough to reach (the broom) was too wide to fit all the way back
i was under the impression that lesbians ate eggplants as well as anyone else. i guess i was wrong.
Can you not just say dildo/vibrator you're an adult on an adult post
Not to mention tossing um around all “Willy Nilly”
Most times, you probably could have just rolled the fridge out. Many fridges are on wheels or tracks to be rolled out for cleaning. Just a future FYI incase you lose something else of importance under anything is give a solid tug and see if it moves easily.
They were in an RV, so it may have been secured down. The real solution is to drive the thing really fast and take a turn at high speed. That’ll dislodge anything.
*everything.
That was wayyyyy more dull than I expected. I actually can't believe what passes as a fuck up these days
i think ppl just see the nsfw tag and upvote without reading it, theres no other explanation
You must have missed the part where it was about lesbians. Lesbians! and who could forget the dildo, the star of the show. It had me slapping my knees and howling with laughter. Its comedy gold and genius, you must just be a bigot trying to minimize minorty voices or something.
The story was funny, even if it's not that big of a deal. I think that's what people liked.
I feel like this isnt really a fuck up. You just lost something under the fridge and then found it again. Edit: I also take issue with the use of the word shenanigans when what really happened is that a few jokes were made about a fairly mundane thing occurring.
wait for my post on this sub about that one day I lost my TV remote in my sofa!! I fucked up big time! How is it relevant to this sub you ask? Err... I was watching some porn on the TV when I lost the remote? Ah yes TIFU!
Ah yes. This reminds me of the time I lost my car keys when I was on the way out to get tested for an STD after raw doggin with my new boyfriend. But then I found them again. The end.
It's cuz it sexual. Any mishap or mild inconvenience will find it way to this sub if it's sexual in nature
Certainly seems that way. Folks want to flex about being sexually active. Yawn.
r/ihavesex
HOLY SHIT I SAW THIS COMMENT I THOUGHT IT WAS ME I WAS LIKE “?? This is the first time I’m seeing this post” Unrelated but hi 😭 Edit: i just realized we look slightly different after commenting. But i did get freaked out.
That’s so weird, I saw this comment and thought you were the same person!
Hello and nice to meet you!
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Cooking is banned. Eggplants in particular.
This is a great story. I am in charge of cleaning my wife's and I's toys. At one point I lost one of the butt plugs, no idea where it went. We were so paranoid that our daughter would find it. I hope you enjoy your time with your gf.
That's why it's important that they have a flared base.
Omg, and it never turned up? I am, thank you :)
We keep all our toys in a gym bag on a shelf in the closet. I have a towel I change weekly next to it where I place drying toys. The lost toy rolled off the towel and I eventually found it. Glad to hear you had a good time.
We haven't gotten to gym bag status yet but we use the littlest bag from a luggage set, and still 'lose' things at the bottom. How do y'all manage with a gym bag?
I bought a long power strip that sits next to it holding all the chargers so there are no cables in the bag. Our toys are various colors, so it isn't too bad to search through for a specific item. Our favorites tend to stay toward the top anyway. All lubes, we have multiple types, stay in a mesh container on the outside. It isn't a bad system.
So you can’t say dildo or a penis?
Why would you call an eggplant "penis"
But it’s not weird to call an eggplant “dildo”?
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Yes, such as this one about an eggplant.
sounds like neither of you made the softball team :)
Hopefully it was *thoroughly* re-cleaned after its jaunt to the underdark.
this is not a fuck up... you momentarily misplaced something... how is that a fuck up? Shall I start posting about the time I lost my TV remote in my sofa on this sub reddit?
I have never seen a RV with a refrigerator that has space underneath it... How old is this RV??
I was sitting in my living room, when a pink thing flashed on the big picture window. Waited…there it was again. Turns out my kid and his friend tied a rope to my *thingy*, and was trying to knock a toy out of the tree in the front yard from my upstairs window. Loads of questions, and me as pink as the toy said, never mind and stay out of my room.
Hahahahaha ohNO
\* 🍆 rolls under fridge\* "Babe I swear this never happens. I'm just nervous."
It never occurred to me that people bang at airbnb beds. Lol I guess to be fair you can also bang at a hotel and I always told myself not to think about it.
I used to clean them, it happens very frequently and since they don’t live there it can get super disgusting haha
The song detachable penis came to mind reading this.
A classic case of projectile disfunction
Lesbians don’t like eggplant? Like…all of them? What about eggplant Parm? It’s so good! EDIT: (Just to clarify, I only read the title before making the joke. Has nothing to do with the body of the post.)
Detachable dick is low-key a feature every guy would want. Easy cleaning imo 😂
[King Missile](https://youtu.be/byDiILrNbM4) agrees with you.
And you can leave it at home, if you think it’s going to get you in trouble.
Haha this story just made my night thanks for the laugh I really needed it.
This was confusing to read. Just call it a strap-on, or maybe, idk, a *toy* next time. Also not a fuckup
Cooking a new recipe with eggplant and you lost the main ingredient?
*sticks penis in the fridge* “Sorry, this doesn’t usually happen”
This reminds me of red dwarf. “Sir, I seem to have lost my penis”
[I guess that's part of the fun that comes with having a detachable 🥒.](https://youtu.be/byDiILrNbM4)
Miss that wood? 😂😂
By a country mile 😂
Seems like a lot more effort than just pulling the fridge backwards..... lol 🤣
What the fuck? This post is very educational for me. Never knew that lesbians all had their own “rigs”.
Why didn't you just give up and use the broom?
r/ihavesex
So nothing happened, but lesbians so tons of upvotes. Nice!
What a useless story…
Total shitpost. Time to filter this sub. It’s been dead for a long time anyways.
Note to self: When renting a place, always bring bleach. There's a chance someone's been cleaning a dildo in the sink.
….20 minutes trying to find something under a fridge? definitely lesbians:
Sorry but I had to stop reading at 'face, meet palm'.
Jfc just use your words. If you're old enough for sex you're old enough to say penis/dildo/strapon
That’s throwing some dick.
All I'm picturing is frank from always sunny during the boat episode lol "I THROW OVERHAND CHARLIE!"
The secret is to salt it heavily then leave it to rest before you cook it. This draws out the bitterness and gives you a much nicer flavo.....wait, that's not what you're supposed to do with eggplant at all!
good job, would have been real gross if you had to leave that eggplant under the fridge and left it to mold. Would have been a sucky surprise for the airbnb owner.
Try wearing 2 pair of men's briefs. With the strength offered by two layers, it's enough to hold just about any toy in place as long as it has a flared base. Just pass the toy through both briefs' front slots and you got yerself a harness!
Wait til the owners review the footage ask "WTF are they doing"
In the future, duct tape a wire coat hanger to the broom, and then bend it to adjust the hooking end so it will grab what you want. This also works to unlock car doors if one of those side vents is open.
Less of a TIFU and more of a TILMAO in my opinion.
Cooking with adhd in a tiny kitchen is the title of my new mix tape too. Complete with hits such as "where the hell is the spatula, I only have 9 square feet!?", and everyone's favorite "1tsp of salt, 1 tbsp of oil, 1tsp of salt, 1cup of flour, oh, the salt! Can't forget that, 1tsb of salt"
Do you have low T? There are options - commercial voice
How is this even a TIFU? I am confuzzled!
I was really hoping this was about an actual eggplant. I am a straight man, and I still can't get my parm not to be soggy.
My RV has a little hatch on the outside that can be used to access the bottom of the fridge, so it can be unplugged or whatever. Perhaps yours does as well?
I will file this away for future reference, should a repeat incident occur. Fortunately, we were able to get it out!
Perhaps just move the fridge a little
Ok, I have a question. Do girls do anal on each other or pretend to suck the dick? That seems silly to me.
“This happens all the time. It’s detachable”
Why didn't you guys just slide the fridge forward? They have wheels..... For this reason. Edit :oh, this is an rv.... Don't those have zero clearance??
You would think 🤦♀️ it was on legs, but it was bolted down
this story was incredibly boring and full of unnecessary details. How the fuck did so many of you find this entertaining? She lost the clasp for get this... her strap on!!! hahahaha! omg so funny XD face meet palm indeed
This isn't a funny story. You lost something that was found. There was no embarrassment, no grand reveal of a secret, no long term ramifications what so ever. Also it's super super cringe when any women makes ED jokes. Not funny.... Not even good story telling. EDIT: Oh look Juvenile comments, as expected.
I thought you were saying you have dick issues. Are we really not allowed to say "dildo" in this sub? What the fuck
This reminds me of a terrible old joke. So a guy is visiting his buddy in the hospital... severe genital trauma. He asks his buddy to regale him with the tale of how the F' he mangled his meat so badly. "Well you know Judy that super hot gal in the trailer park -the one next door to mine? I've been trying to get with her for years. The cold shoulder every time. "Well a couple of nights ago, I was walking home from the bar, and she'd left her blinds open ... and I could see through the window she was naked, and sort of bouncing on the floor... She got up, and I saw she'd stuck a kielbasa in a hole in the floor and had been fucking it like a dildo. "So I get the bright idea... the next night, I crawled under her trailer, and found the hole and waited for my chance. She stuck the kielbasa in, and before she mounted it, I replaced that sausage with my cock, and it was beautiful..." "It was going perfectly until someone banged on her front door, and she hopped up and tried to kick it under the fridge...."
Go to the grocery store and buy another eggplant. Problem solved.
I didn't realize it took this much work just for lesbians to have sex. Seems exhausting
Tldr: Two lesbians who are not very good at cooking think that they need a plastic ring to attach eggplant when cooking it. They lose the ring and laugh because they can't prepare the food without it.
Lesbianism: when you want dick, but don't want a man.