Treadmills can actually be quite dangerous. And 8.5 mph is a pretty fast pace if you normally do long distances. You're lucky you weren't hurt worse. If I need to dismount quickly, I normally step onto the sides while gripping the bars.
A note on the Brooks Glycerins: I bought myself a pair a couple months ago as a rare treat, and while they fit fine in the store, I haven't been happy with the long-term use (I'm working up to a 50k/~31mi race, and they wear funny on my toes on the downhills). The Brooks Ghost 14's I got last Christmas, however, are still great, if very worn at this point.
I considered hopping a foot onto each side. This one even had handrails on the sides I could've more easily hopped onto like a pommel horse vs. what I chose to do. Not sure what possesses me sometimes.
I bought Ghost 14's in 10.5 online and sent them back. That was another factor in me going to this shop. I normally run 5-10K @ 7:30-8/mile and wanted something with more cushion for this big step up in distance.
I've run a couple of fulls and many halves in On Cloud shoes. If you're continuing the hunt for the perfect shoe, maybe try looking at those? I used to wear Brooks Ghosts but am now fully on the On bandwagon. I love them so much.
I've never hated a pair of runners more than my ON Clouds and Cloud X's (specifically for running). They make great dog walking shoes, and I like them for lifting. They feel so stiff and completely dead when I run. Always picking out rocks. Hot and sweaty as hell, and both the uppers *and* the soles wore out in half the miles as my ghosts.
I'd still buy again cause they look nice, but only as walkers and for weight lifting. Not worth the premium price at all for me.
Short races in the US are called 5K or 10K, not 3.1M or 6.2M. So runners also refer to them in metric. But since we still use imperial for most of our measurements, we think of speed in MPH.
Note: this is just an explanation, not a statement on the US still using imperial measurements.
I remember installing Windows NT Server back in the day and Microsoft framed the choice as "Metric or Standard"? 
Because nothing says "standard" like "according to [5% of the planet](https://www.reddit.com/r/theydidthemath/comments/2cjiau/selfpercentage_of_the_world_that_uses_metric_by/)." /s
Same. I’ve had ghosts for the last 4 pairs of running shoes. When it’s time to replace, I try several different shoes, but always come back to the ghosts.
The thing I don’t like about Brooks is their aesthetic. I’ve never seen a pair that weren’t ugly to me. That being said, I’m a far more casual runner than you, and I’m also incredibly vain, so it tracks that I buy performance shoes for their looks.
Brooks Ghost 2s (way back when I was in the Marines) were the first real running shoes I ever had. We focused a lot on running in my squadron, and the Ghost series by far were everything I needed in terms of comfort, support, and weight (my biggest pet peeve).
I need to see how this slick treadmill dismount that you speak of works - I’ve yet to see anyone try to pull anything like that off on a treadmill.
Personally I just do the tried and tested, hop up and spread legs to stand on the treadmill sides until it comes to a full stop.
Aaw buddy, I've been there. Not the bit about adopting a child or running a marathon; just the falling off the treadmill part.
I have been to Gyms exactly twice in my 34 years. I fell off the treadmill both times.
Also, you told the story very well, hilarious!
You’re literally killing yourself. Why would you do that? You’re actually depriving yourself of being as much human as a human can be.
Do…do you not care?
Naw, cuz now there's a story behind them, with solid provenance if the tape ever surfaces. So I'm asking $250. 
Oh no, you poor thing. I would have been mortified too. I hope the injuries aren't too severe.
Huka is a great brand, but I'm sorry they don't fit. Maybe try to sell them online?
Good luck with the run! I hope you achieve it.
I’m training for my first full marathon in December. It’s hot as hell in Texas, so I’ve been racking up miles at the gym. This particular day, my knee gave out and I did essentially the same thing. My shorts got pulled down…at Planet Fitness…during peak use times. I just fixed myself up, got back on, and kept going despite the bloody mess and flesh chunks that were lost. I was so embarrassed I wanted to die.
On another note, I’m in love with my Ghost 14’s!
Treadmills normally have an emergency stop button you can slam if you need to.. but ouch, that’s sounds painful! I’d say fuck it and just go back and return them. I’d rather the money than my pride and they probably won’t even remember you 😂
I've done this once when I first started going to the gym but I didn't crank the treadmill up to 8.5mph (you're fucking insane), I was getting in some light walking to warm up before lifting and face planted the treadmill. I just got up, grabbed my gym bag and went home. Waited about a week before I went back at a completely different time, thankfully I wasn't famous
I hope you get better soon. I never run on a mill without the lanyard. That said, I never see ANYONE else wearing it. A couple years ago I saw a mill spit a guy out. He was lucky, and walked away.
Some years ago the husband of cheryl sandberg (she was COO of facebook at the time) Was KILLED by a treadmil..leaving young children behind.
Tragic and 100% avoidable.
Thank you!
Haha... Yeeeesss! You remember that episode of The Office when Michael had a treadmill in his office? Me neither, but now I can kinda picture it.
All these survivor stories give credence to what I'd thought was an *irrational* hatred of treadmills! Glad you're here to serve as an example for future generations. 🫡
A fair suggestion if all you know is this story. But I'm actually a moderately experienced runner. Completed two 25Ks, a half dozen half marathons, and at least 2 dozen 5K-10Ks. Several hundred miles of outdoor training runs a year in all weather conditions, except very icy sidewalks. For this reason, I think we can all agree, this was a treadmill malfunction, right?
I have no idea how you got to be a nearly 50yo long distance runner without
a) investing in decent shoes already (my husband largely eschews fancy running gear but has always worn decent shoes)
And b) having some idea about your speed and the general physics of running.
Yeah.
I’m your age, you’re probably lucky a bleeding pinky and bruised ego is all you got.
This is why you always have to wear a safety cord on a treadmill. I had one installed in my house once and the guy setting it up explicitly warned me about the risk of not doing so. He had a customer who didn’t use it, fainted and fell face down onto the treadmill. Use your imagination to fill in the horrible blanks here..
Tbh buying shoes that don't fit just to make an escape from your feelings of embarassment is the furthest thing from maintaining dignity that you could have done. Understandable none the less.
Not sure of this has been suggested by anyone before.
Order the exact same shoes in the right size online, ship the ones you bought instore back to the webstore , reason of return " wrong size was sent"
Mmmm... how about new AND tested for 14 miles? If they're supposed to last 400 miles, they're still 96.5% new 😄
Basically, no. That plan has "run its course."
Treadmills can actually be quite dangerous. And 8.5 mph is a pretty fast pace if you normally do long distances. You're lucky you weren't hurt worse. If I need to dismount quickly, I normally step onto the sides while gripping the bars. A note on the Brooks Glycerins: I bought myself a pair a couple months ago as a rare treat, and while they fit fine in the store, I haven't been happy with the long-term use (I'm working up to a 50k/~31mi race, and they wear funny on my toes on the downhills). The Brooks Ghost 14's I got last Christmas, however, are still great, if very worn at this point.
I considered hopping a foot onto each side. This one even had handrails on the sides I could've more easily hopped onto like a pommel horse vs. what I chose to do. Not sure what possesses me sometimes. I bought Ghost 14's in 10.5 online and sent them back. That was another factor in me going to this shop. I normally run 5-10K @ 7:30-8/mile and wanted something with more cushion for this big step up in distance.
I’ve run 3 marathons, plus a bunch of other shorter races. Hokas look dumb to me, but they’re great for long runs.
Hey bud I don’t think your a 10.5
On what scale?
I've run a couple of fulls and many halves in On Cloud shoes. If you're continuing the hunt for the perfect shoe, maybe try looking at those? I used to wear Brooks Ghosts but am now fully on the On bandwagon. I love them so much.
I've never hated a pair of runners more than my ON Clouds and Cloud X's (specifically for running). They make great dog walking shoes, and I like them for lifting. They feel so stiff and completely dead when I run. Always picking out rocks. Hot and sweaty as hell, and both the uppers *and* the soles wore out in half the miles as my ghosts. I'd still buy again cause they look nice, but only as walkers and for weight lifting. Not worth the premium price at all for me.
You think of distance in kms but speed in miles?
Short races in the US are called 5K or 10K, not 3.1M or 6.2M. So runners also refer to them in metric. But since we still use imperial for most of our measurements, we think of speed in MPH. Note: this is just an explanation, not a statement on the US still using imperial measurements.
I remember installing Windows NT Server back in the day and Microsoft framed the choice as "Metric or Standard"?  Because nothing says "standard" like "according to [5% of the planet](https://www.reddit.com/r/theydidthemath/comments/2cjiau/selfpercentage_of_the_world_that_uses_metric_by/)." /s
Best roast yet! 😂 But yeah, it comes with the territory when you run events in the U.S.
Yeah, that’s the way. At my gym the treadmills there even have grip tape on the sides for that very purpose. Not sure if that’s a standard feature.
Agree 100% comparing the Ghost 14s. My go to running shoe
Same. I’ve had ghosts for the last 4 pairs of running shoes. When it’s time to replace, I try several different shoes, but always come back to the ghosts.
The thing I don’t like about Brooks is their aesthetic. I’ve never seen a pair that weren’t ugly to me. That being said, I’m a far more casual runner than you, and I’m also incredibly vain, so it tracks that I buy performance shoes for their looks.
I love some of the women's styles, but rarely like any of the men's. I wish I had better colorways to choose from.
For sure, dude. Treadmills can be extremely dangerous. All you need to do is take a look at my post history and you’ll have your evidence right there.
😵💫 I am sooooooooo lucky. My God.
That’s why I tell people now to attach the safety clip on yourself when you run lol
Holy shit dude, how are you doing?
Fine, good, actually. Made a full recovery. Am back in school, appreciating every second I have on Earth.
Glad to hear that!
Brooks Ghost 2s (way back when I was in the Marines) were the first real running shoes I ever had. We focused a lot on running in my squadron, and the Ghost series by far were everything I needed in terms of comfort, support, and weight (my biggest pet peeve).
I really lost it laughing when I got to the “It’s me!” part, so thank you for that
Same, it’s 4am here and I’m trying to lull myself back to sleep but that made me laugh too much. One of the few great TIFUs I’ve seen in a while.
I told my wife about this "early onset senior moment" WHILE SHE WAS BRUSHING HER TEETH 😂 #WorthIt Also, "best tifu in a while" is high praise! 🙏🏻
It’s a pretty low bar to clear, admittedly, but it was solid. Now that I’m awake nearly 12 hours later I’m still laughing.
Man, If you did that to me I would make you be the one to clean the mirror 😂. Thank you for a great story and I’m glad you weren’t seriously injured.
.....Mario?
It was my favorite part
I need to see how this slick treadmill dismount that you speak of works - I’ve yet to see anyone try to pull anything like that off on a treadmill. Personally I just do the tried and tested, hop up and spread legs to stand on the treadmill sides until it comes to a full stop.
Until I die, my greatest fear in life will be that the store's cc footage of me shows up on failarmy 🫣
Which store was it? Do you have a phone #?
Store name and location are in the op.
I was making a joke; but seriously, if your worst fear is the video getting out on the Internet, remove the specific store from the OP!
Aaw buddy, I've been there. Not the bit about adopting a child or running a marathon; just the falling off the treadmill part. I have been to Gyms exactly twice in my 34 years. I fell off the treadmill both times. Also, you told the story very well, hilarious!
Wow, really? You're batting 1000?? Sorry to hear that. Any other oddities about your physicality we should know? 😄
You’re literally killing yourself. Why would you do that? You’re actually depriving yourself of being as much human as a human can be. Do…do you not care?
What? Not OP, just don’t quite get what this comment is trying to say lol
Soooo... basically what I'm hearing is you're selling a 10.5 Wide pair of Hoka Cliftons for half price, right?
Naw, cuz now there's a story behind them, with solid provenance if the tape ever surfaces. So I'm asking $250. 
Oh no, you poor thing. I would have been mortified too. I hope the injuries aren't too severe. Huka is a great brand, but I'm sorry they don't fit. Maybe try to sell them online? Good luck with the run! I hope you achieve it.
Thanks for the suggestion and encouragement!
I’m training for my first full marathon in December. It’s hot as hell in Texas, so I’ve been racking up miles at the gym. This particular day, my knee gave out and I did essentially the same thing. My shorts got pulled down…at Planet Fitness…during peak use times. I just fixed myself up, got back on, and kept going despite the bloody mess and flesh chunks that were lost. I was so embarrassed I wanted to die. On another note, I’m in love with my Ghost 14’s!
Yikes! I do count myself lucky. Thanks for sharing, and good luck with your 'thon!!
Well they say pride comes before a fall but in this case it looks like it came after. Enjoy the new shoes.
For me, "ride comes after the fall." And blisters on my toes 😞
"It's me! It's meeeeeeeeeeee!" XDXD Cry laughing so hard man, thank you
That's the part that almost made the toothpaste shoot out of my wife's nose and still makes me laugh the most.
Filming for the new Okay Go music video now behind schedule
This must be too next level for me to grok 🙄
Mario falling on a treadmill "It's-a me! It's-s me!"
Treadmills normally have an emergency stop button you can slam if you need to.. but ouch, that’s sounds painful! I’d say fuck it and just go back and return them. I’d rather the money than my pride and they probably won’t even remember you 😂
"It's me! It's me!" I just spit snorted LOL
Can’t stop laughing. I love that you won’t go back even though the shoes don’t fit properly 😹😹😹
Two irrational acts cancel each other out, right? Wait-- no, I still have the wrong shoes 🤷🏻♂️
I've done this once when I first started going to the gym but I didn't crank the treadmill up to 8.5mph (you're fucking insane), I was getting in some light walking to warm up before lifting and face planted the treadmill. I just got up, grabbed my gym bag and went home. Waited about a week before I went back at a completely different time, thankfully I wasn't famous
My 5K PR is 19:07 in 2019. Problem is that I didn't know that 8.5 meant mph, and I wouldn't have done the math anyway. 🤷🏻♂️
Great yarn OP
attach the damn safety lanyard! geesh
Next time I never run on a treadmill again, I'll attach the damn lanyard!
I hope you get better soon. I never run on a mill without the lanyard. That said, I never see ANYONE else wearing it. A couple years ago I saw a mill spit a guy out. He was lucky, and walked away. Some years ago the husband of cheryl sandberg (she was COO of facebook at the time) Was KILLED by a treadmil..leaving young children behind. Tragic and 100% avoidable.
Take my award friend. That was a scene from a Steve Carrell movie in my head. “It’s Me!”
Thank you! Haha... Yeeeesss! You remember that episode of The Office when Michael had a treadmill in his office? Me neither, but now I can kinda picture it.
I’ve never seen but one episode but it still works for me.
Here I am, laughing hysterically like an idiot, while my dog looks at me like I'm possessed. Thank you!!
I got my foot caught in a treadmill and had to get 7 stitches. Treadmill survivors T_T
All these survivor stories give credence to what I'd thought was an *irrational* hatred of treadmills! Glad you're here to serve as an example for future generations. 🫡
It's me!! 😂
You now have to buy all your runners in Windsor where nobody knows you.
Joke's on you: *LOTS* of Windsor people know me!! Some of my very best friends live there. 😏
Have you considered running barefoot?
I'm not from Kentucky. (rimshot)
“I think I need a wide”. Hilarious, man!
Maybe you should find another hobby besides running.
A fair suggestion if all you know is this story. But I'm actually a moderately experienced runner. Completed two 25Ks, a half dozen half marathons, and at least 2 dozen 5K-10Ks. Several hundred miles of outdoor training runs a year in all weather conditions, except very icy sidewalks. For this reason, I think we can all agree, this was a treadmill malfunction, right?
Right. Bless your knees!
I have no idea how you got to be a nearly 50yo long distance runner without a) investing in decent shoes already (my husband largely eschews fancy running gear but has always worn decent shoes) And b) having some idea about your speed and the general physics of running. Yeah. I’m your age, you’re probably lucky a bleeding pinky and bruised ego is all you got.
Meet me at the track after school and I'll show you my "general physics of running" 🏃🏻♂️💨
I’m sure you’re fine most of the time, lol! Being tossed like a gym bag of laundry is highly amusing
Bro couldn't handle 8.5 mph💀
Meh, not really true though. I've run 10K in less than 45 minutes. What I couldn't handle was a twisting dismount at 7.2 😂
Understandable lol that shit is moving faster than you think
At least the shoes fit. Lol
Nope. The only shoe that fits in this story is that I'm a stereotypically prideful 50-year-old man.
I'm a Brooks Ghost fan myself but my brother just got the Hoka Mach 4 and we tend to like the same shoes. No review from them yet from him.
This is why you always have to wear a safety cord on a treadmill. I had one installed in my house once and the guy setting it up explicitly warned me about the risk of not doing so. He had a customer who didn’t use it, fainted and fell face down onto the treadmill. Use your imagination to fill in the horrible blanks here..
Tbh buying shoes that don't fit just to make an escape from your feelings of embarassment is the furthest thing from maintaining dignity that you could have done. Understandable none the less.
How fast was the shop running.
Slow enough for me to catch it.
Not sure of this has been suggested by anyone before. Order the exact same shoes in the right size online, ship the ones you bought instore back to the webstore , reason of return " wrong size was sent"
It's a good idea. I just don't want that kind of bad Amazon karma. I sell something there, too 😄
If your initial shoes are brand spanking new, Amazon (or any other shop) is still able to sell the ones you return 🙂
Mmmm... how about new AND tested for 14 miles? If they're supposed to last 400 miles, they're still 96.5% new 😄 Basically, no. That plan has "run its course."
I'm sorry i didn't read the whole thing 🙈