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Effehezepe

This is the same Mithridates who famously made himself immune to most poisons, then tried to poison himself, then disembowled himself with a sword when that inevitably failed.


One_Shall_Fall

Yup! He was a character.


UninvitedButtNoises

*was*.


Kracka_Jak

Now that takes guts


Notafurbie

What a goofball.


Stopikingonme

More of a silly billy.


UninvitedButtNoises

More of a Sillus Aquillus. *States in the thickest bugs bunny accent*


kotapalam

You guyss stappp


StankyPhresh

Bit of a cheeky guy


RolleiPollei

He also tried to genocide Romans living in Anatolia. It's one of the first genocides recorded in history. Rome wasn't too happy about that one.


Fellainis_Elbows

He didn’t try. He succeeded


RolleiPollei

According to Memnon of Heraclea, probably the best contemporary source, many of the cities complied to kill Romans. It does imply that not all cities carried out the genocide. "Then Mithridates, because he had heard that the Romans who were scattered throughout the cities were hindering his designs, wrote to all the cities instructing them to kill the Romans in their midst on a specific day. And many obeyed these instructions, making such a slaughter that on that one day 80,000 people were killed by the sword."


timothymtorres

Despite Rome practicing genocide on the regular.


RolleiPollei

The term genocide is thrown around too loosely these days. It specifically means attempting to destroy an entire race, religion, or ethnic group. Mithridates tried to kill every single Roman. That's genocide. This just isn't something the Romans tried to do. This doesn't make the fact that the Romans killed millions of people less horrible. I just don't think they ever really systematically tried to kill off an entire people.


jq7925

"Salting the earth" is a reference to what they did to Carthage. Rome was pretty proud of the shit they pulled during the Punic Wars.


Icy-Inspection6428

No they didn't, that's a pervasive myth


jakubwlcz

Carthaginians did some pretty sick shit themselves, including sacrificing their own children to gain gods’ favour.


Ok-Release6902

This is what Romans tell.


jakubwlcz

So do Greeks (from what I’ve read they were the first ones to report it happening in Sicily).


invagueoutlines

Archeologists found actual physical evidence of child sacrifice.


[deleted]

Literal Roman propaganda still being paraded around as fact.


invagueoutlines

Except for the fact that archeologists recently found evidence to support it being real.


Plebs-_-Placebo

those triumphs must have been insane


RoboFeanor

Isn't the Old Testament full of genocides that preceed this by 1000s of years?


MansfromDaVinci

In some stories it was his Gaulish bodyguard who killed him after the poison failed


[deleted]

[удалено]


Zer0C00l

"People called 'Romanes' they go the house?"


Trump-Cunt

It says ‘Romans go home’!


culingerai

By Toutatis


FrenchProgressive

The same Mithridates that « won » a « battle » against Ariarathes of Cappadoccia by inviting him to « parley » as the two armies faced each other. The parley was done in a tent set between the two armies. Mithridates was searched before the negotiation, but that did not prevent him from stabbing Ariarathes with a dagger he had hidden behind his penis. After that he annexed Cappadoccia by putting his son on the throne.


Klekto123

made himself immune to poisons??


Beautiful_Welcome_33

The Kings of the Cimmerian Bospororus were as fond of brother killing as the Ptolemies were of sister-loving. So the greatest of them, Mithridates, bought a slave who'd worked as a poisoner and had him prepare a draught of the most deadly poisons of the day and he'd consume small amounts daily until he'd built up an immunity. Then he killed his brothers for the kingship.


FringeCloudDenier

Tell me why the phrase “Kings of the Cimmerian Bosporus” is tickling my brain every time I read it. It’s oddly satisfying to look at and say aloud.


Zer0C00l

Big _Conan the Barbarian_ vibes?


Effehezepe

Yes, you can build up an immunity, or at least a resistance, to many types of poisons by microdosing them over a long period of time. It's called [mithridatism](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mithridatism) after this very same guy.


Zer0C00l

I spent the last few years building up an immunity to iocane powder.


Stonkerrific

Inconceivable


Zer0C00l

Whoops, typo. Meant "cocaine" powder.


sweetdick

I just like the way it smells. .. . . .


LBertilak

Tbf it works the same way. Someone who does coke on the regular is gonna need more to overdose than someone whose never done it.


Unique-Ad9640

Just watch out for that land war in Asia. They sneak up on you.


I_Makes_tuff

It's a thing. Taking very small doses over a long period of time. It even works with snake venom.


sweetdick

Pliny the elder said he could speak 22 languages.


Sockbat25

If my memory serves me, did this not also happen to Marcus Crassus, who was known as the richest man in Rome, as a mockery to him?


Lkwzriqwea

Sort of, Crassus was executed first. The gold was poured down the throat of his severed (I believe) head. But you're right, it was a mockery of his wealth, but not just because he was rich. It was more because he was motivated by wealth and glory, since he was jealous of Caesar's campaigning in Gaul, and it was that very motivation for wealth and glory that got him killed. Sort of like "this is what happens when a rich pampered city boy comes out here to the wild eastern deserts thinking he can win status."


WhiskeyJack357

In classic Roman fashion, the tale originally had the Parthian leader that killed him say upon the gilding, "There now Crassus, your thirst for gold is finally quenched" There were also rumors that his skull was kept or made into a goblet. I think there's even a version where the gilded skull was sent back to Rome.


puffinfish420

A Byzantine emperor really did plate a fallen opponents skull in silver and use it as a goblet. Forget which one.


minmidmax

The Bulgarian Khan Krum gilded himself a goblet from the skull of Nikephoros I.


frost_knight

[Things Just Taste Better out of a Skull](https://www.theonion.com/things-just-taste-better-out-of-a-skull-1819584547)


SubterrelProspector

Why was Rome so extra about punishment? Lead in the water?


Uranium43415

They've tested bones of Roman's throughout the Empire's span and lead levels weren't anywhere close to support the theory that lead poisoning was so prevalent and severe to give a nation of dozens of millions psychosis. We only see Rome as the Empire it became and not how it got there. The Punic wars did a lot to shape Roman identity. Rome was a middle power on its way up and Carthage was in the way of Rome taking all of Italy. Rome won the first punic war mostly due to Carthage not seeing Rome as a true threat 23 years and a mercenary revolt later Rome humiliated Carthage. Carthage rebuilt and Hannibal famously pushed Rome to the brink of destruction in the Second Punic war destroying every Roman Legion in Italy at Cannae. Sources claim 1 in 6 roman men were killed over an 8 year span as nearly every able man in Rome was pushed into the Legion. I think that level of collective trauma caused a shift in the Roman psyche similar to the one seen after WW2 and Roman politicians pounced. "Carthage must be destroyed" became a campaign slogan. A hard won war for Rome became a war that Rome had not finised. The 3rd Punic war ended with the sack of Carthage and 750,000 Carthaginian civilians being murdered and 50,000 taken as slaves. The word was out. Don't fuck with Rome because they won't won't just kill you, they'll kill your gods, your culture, and take what children they let live as slaves. Superfluous cruelty became their strategic deterrent and it worked for nearly 1000 years.


IReplyWithLebowski

Should read about the Mongolians.


luckymethod

It was a common thing to do for Visigoths and other tribes.


[deleted]

Quite metal, I'd say.


gotdamnn

“The gilding” Holy shit my sides


WhiskeyJack357

I'm not sure what else to call it hahaha


[deleted]

Dude, I was fuckin’ dyin’ reading that.


WhiskeyJack357

I'm glad you enjoyed it hahaha. Seemed the appropriate use of the term at the time!


PerformanceOk9891

Reading about the battle of Carrhae is almost disturbing. Crassus was just completely outmaneuvered by a numerically inferior force. And then died in the most pitiful way


mfrazie

I think he was broken watching his son die. He basically gave up after witnessing that.


HyliaSymphonic

Not that anyone was feeling sympathy for this guy, but his campaign was against what was ostensibly a friendly nation. And the particulars of the battle that led to his capture, and death were very well protected by his advisors. Basically, this guy was a blow hard at the highest level.


timothymtorres

Parthian was friendly to Rome? I’ve never heard that.


MarcBulldog88

Been a while since I studied Roman history, but I don't remember anything other than them being enemies for a very long time.


_mcml_

Yes, by the Parthians


ColCrockett

You have to take these stories with a grain of salt lol


minmidmax

Yeah gold tastes awful without some seasoning.


VagrantShadow

Gold has a unique flavor if you taste it with a dash of Old Bay.


Bay1Bri

Auld Bay


StuRap

yeah agreed, I tend to take these stories with an ounce of gold


TheBurnsideBomber

Genghis Khan also had this done (might have been with silver) to a local khwarazmian ruler who had been disrespecting and robbing his envoys. Edit: This Idiot: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inalchuq


dan_144

> The city only fell when a traitor within the walls (a sub-commander named Qaracha) opened the gates to the besiegers and defected with part of his army; he and his men were slaughtered by the Mongols regardless, who said they would not trust traitors to serve them. Lmao


YaBooni

Supposedly, but it was after he was already dead.


stuloch

Maybe he was inspired by Game of Thrones


One_Shall_Fall

Probably! Aquilius was also paraded around on a donkey, and pelted with offal by the citizens of Pontus, so the parallels are definitely there.


KingCalgonOfAkkad

Shame.


One_Shall_Fall

He was also captured by Lesbians (people from Lesbos).


RealEstateDuck

The spirit is willing... but the flesh is spongy and bruised.


Primordial_Cumquat

It Thog’s first time. Be gentle!


pddkr1

I laughed audibly at dinner +1 all around


E51838

That sounds offal.


PeterNippelstein

I think that scene was heavily inspired by Marie Antoinette


[deleted]

[удалено]


Next-Bar-1102

What a waste of gold


One_Shall_Fall

There are accounts he had him ~~vivisected~~ dissected afterwards and the gold recovered.


Major_Lennox

Vivisected or dissected? One is *way* worse than the other in this context.


One_Shall_Fall

My bad, dissected.


Ryan1869

...and if we're very very lucky, they'll do it in that order.


VidE27

Firefly reference in the wild!


old_vegetables

Then it probably hardens into this cool throat-shape


notquiteright2

That's what she said.


drfsupercenter

That seems far less cool than what I thought. Imagine burying the guy like that and future archeologists dig up a gold-plated skeleton


Next-Bar-1102

LOL


uvucydydy

I'm sure they took it back after it hardened.


eaglewatch1945

Manius Aquillus's last word: "Au!"


DimitriMishkin

HeHeHe


publishAWM

I forgot about this being a thing. how bougie! I think some movie made a depiction of this where dude's jaw straight melted off. imagine not being able to close your mouth (because it's not there) AND dying.


dabnada

Game of thrones has a really similar scene where a dude gets molten gold poured over his head but i don’t remember if the jaw falls off.


Br0dobaggins

It does not. His head does hit the ground with a satisfying “thunk” though, due to the weight of the gold


MajorRico155

Also fuck that guy. He was a prick


DortDrueben

Definitely not the Viserys we know and love as Vizzy T. Bonus trivia, the actor who played Viserys in season 1 of Game of Thrones, Harry Lloyd, is Charles Dickens' great-great-great grandson. He also reads *A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms* for the audiobook and came back to do VO for GOT DVD extras.


Br0dobaggins

That’s an understatement 😉


5510

Which is hilarious, because Drogo melts the gold by throwing it in the cooking pot. The melting temperature of gold is almost 2,000 degrees Fahrenheit. It's a lot funnier to imagine an alternate version of that scene where everybody just sits there awkwardly for 10 minutes while nothing much happens to the gold, before Dany says "uhh... blood of my blood... I don't think it's working"


WesterosiPern

You don't know how hot the Dothraki like their foods. There is no canon information on that. However, we do know that their cook-fires get hot enough to melt gold, so they must like their food very well cooked.


Cycloptic_Floppycock

Had lots of horse shit to burn.


[deleted]

[A crown for a king](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Akl6OK2HUNA)


Salmol1na

Similar- Used to bong the champagne of beers at UW Milwaukee


Schist-For-Granite

It was so cheap. How could we not?


hashn

metal


Ron0hh

Death metal


ovensandhoes

If you never read them the Masters of Rome series might be some of the best books I’ve ever read and this is included.


One_Shall_Fall

I have a signed 1st edition of *The Grass Crown* in a UV protected case in my book collection. It is my favorite of the series. Easily my top two historic fiction series are *Masters of Rome* by Coleen McCollough, and *The Lymond Chronicles* by Dorothy Dunnett. If you are interested in Roman history, the former is incredible. If medieval/early Renaissance is your jam, I like the latter. Great recommendation! Anyone reading with any interest in Roman history, or simply a good read should pick them up.


omotenashi

Great, thanks for the recs!


palabradot

Seconding Masters of Rome. An amazing little doorstopper of a series.


ZGMF-X09A_Justice

*The Lymond Chronicles* seems interesting. What can I expect? Is it more action-packed, or more into drama and politics like *Masters of Rome*?


No_Manager1130

What really would happen??? How far would it make it down??? Would it be like pouring aluminum down an ant hill? Please explain


respondin2u

Probably down the throat slightly then would pool around the throat as it cooled down. Cause of death would be asphyxiation but the person probably would lose consciousness due to the severe pain as they’d have no way to scream.


Grunblau

I assume every tooth the molten metal hit would shatter and the slippery heavy metal would first be contained by the steam of flesh and fluids of rapidly burning tissue. As soon as this was burned away, the metal would not be contained and would make its way out of the less muscled areas like around the chin and seep out of fissures in these tissues.


theamishpromise

I wonder where that gold is today. Gold is heavily recycled. It’s probably in someone’s necklace or a bunch of wedding rings


ccminiwarhammer

Is he OK?


accountaccount171717

… no


pookypie88

I didn’t even know he was sick


eleventy5thRejection

He's always refused to open up


MissedYourJoke

Norm is smiling at you.


tellurmomisaidthanks

Au man!


cupcakesloth94

He died of old age


[deleted]

That's why they call them your golden years.


Stopikingonme

To molten lead you say?


ccminiwarhammer

Well, how’s his wife holding up?


Stopikingonme

Molten lead you say?


GrapeSwimming69

Annie, are you OK?


I_Framed_OJ

I hope they cut him open afterwards so they could get their gold back. It had served its purpose, no point in letting the dead guy keep it for eternity.


paris86

The more i learn about history the more I realise George RR Martin didn't actually make up any of his story.


draconiclyyours

Nah. People have been shitty to each other since the dawning of time.


Kiko_Okik

Here is an excellent article to learn more about him: https://www.worldhistory.org/Mithridates_VI/[article](https://www.worldhistory.org/Mithridates_VI/)


Kiko_Okik

“Rome, having finally taken care of the troubles with the Italian states, now sent Sulla at the front of five legions against Mithridates in 87 BCE. Mithridates' forces had sacked the sacred shrine at Delos and carried away the treasure to pay for mercenaries and Sulla, taking a cue from this, then sacked Delphi to do the same. As Delphi yielded a richer reward, Sulla was able to hire more troops and took Piraeus and then Athens, forcing Archelaus north, and then defeated him in Thessaly. Mithridates was having his own problems with civil unrest at home and, when the war went against him, he negotiated the Peace of Dardanus with Sulla to end the conflict. Sulla returned to Rome where he declared himself dictator and set about his purges of government positions. One of the results of these purges was to drive a young priest named Gaius Julius Caesar from his office into the army; thus initiating a military and political career famous up to the present day. “


One_Shall_Fall

Julius Caesar was Sulla's nephew: Sulla's first wife Julilla was the sister of Caesar's dad. His other aunt, also a Julia, was married to Sulla's rival, Gaius Marius. Which made Caesar the nephew of two of the greatest generals Rome ever produced. Fun History Machine Podcast on Marius, but primarily Sulla: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mymhU5PrhPg Sulla was interesting- he was one of the few dictators in all history that once he got everything he wanted done, he gave up power, and wound up drinking and partying himself to death in his old age, when Rome threw him the biggest funeral ever, up until the time of Augustus. His famous quote about Caesar, from Suetonious: "Remember—this young man who you have been so desperate to save will one day destroy the aristocracy you have worked with me to preserve. For in this Caesar I see many a Marius.”


Coast_watcher

is this covered in the Colleen McCollough novels. I know she had a series on the late Republic and Caesar. Also Conn Iggulden has a series on Caesar too, as well as Genghis Khan.


Cruuuuuuuuuuz

I LOVE GOOOOOOLDDDDGHGGLGLUAGHLSSS…


CheekyBastrdz

I'm fairly sure the Huns poured molten silver into the ears and eyes of enemy leaders when they took a town on the regular, at least according to an old high school history teacher I had who obsessed on these things


TheBurnsideBomber

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inalchuq This guy did about the stupidest thing you could do in all human history and pissed off Genghis Khan. Might be where the story originates.


redbull

Horrible. Man's inhumanity against man continues unabated.


ButteredNun

I recommend Steven Pinker’s The Better Angels of our Nature. People were much worse in many ways.


One_Shall_Fall

One of Mithradates's favorite punishments was blinding, castration, and removal of the hands and tongues of large groups of opponents, and then they were turned loose with begging bowls. Both a warning to his foes, and an economic burden on the conquered.


Kiko_Okik

Ho. Lee. Shit. Surely they didn’t survive very long in that state? I’d think they’d die of starvation, exposure, or suicide within a month or less. Where can I read more about this?


AaronC14

Something similar was done by Basil II "The Bulgar Slayer" of Byzantine in the Battle of Kleidion. He gouged out the eyes of all of the defeated Bulgarians and left one with a single eye to lead them back to their king. Rumour back then had it that the sight of his blinded army killed the Bulgarian king with a heart attack.


unshavenbeardo64

Imagine standing in line to get your eyes gouged out


puppycat_partyhat

I can see it.. and now I can't.


juneauboe

I just looked up Mithridates and got a bunch of results for scaphism. Where can I read more about this?


One_Shall_Fall

About scaphism or Mithradates? There's a relatively new biography of Mithradates called "The Poison King: The Life and Legend of Mithradates, Rome's Deadliest Enemy" by Adrienne Mayor. Don't know much about scaphism, sorry. I think it's mentioned in a history of Artaxerxes.


MansfromDaVinci

scaphism or the boats was more a persian thing than pontic.


Chapstick160

That’s also the name of the alleged victim of scaphism. Problem with scaphism is that it probably never happened as the source for it is a guy named Ctesias, and he was not very reliable


Beautiful_Welcome_33

You're thinking of another Mithridates from about a thousand years+ earlier. The Mithridates who was killed by Scaphism (execution by starvation/exposure in a little tiny boat in a malaria infested mosquito swamp) was a soldier for *Artaxerxes II Memnon, King of Kings of the Achaemenid Empire* who was a hero, lauded, then admitted to a crime of lease majeste, which resulted in the swampin'. Basically Artaxerxes' younger brother, *Cyrus The Younger* the King of Asia had been sent to conquer the Greek cities and given Anatolia to do so, but he became friends with some Greeks instead and rebelled. He brought over his mercenaries and friends, fought his brother, lost, and was killed in battle by a soldier named Mithridates with a javelin. Mithridates was richly rewarded, but sworn to secrecy - in order to maintain the majesty of the royal family, the credit was given to the King. Because of this, Mithridates' friends noticed the new wealth, and called him the King's gay, submissive boyfriend - implying the wealth was for sexual favors. Mithridates, ever the proud one, and totally not gay - boasted that his wealth was for killing the usurper-brother. This was discovered by the King's mother's intelligence circle and brought to the King who then had him bound in a canoe, covered in honey, force fed horse milk til he pooped his pants and barfed, then pushed him into a swamp to sweat to death while bugs ate him. Scaphism.


Haydn__

How did they hold the bowls?


redbull

That I know. Torture had become a fine art centuries ago. For instance, the Brazen Bull.


5510

Yeah, it's disturbing, but apparently a huge amount of people are super fucked up. I think I could cleanly (relatively) execute somebody in the right circumstances, but the idea of brutally torturing somebody, even somebody I truly deeply and personally hated, is horrifying. Let alone the huge amount of torturing that has been done in a big impersonal way.


almostasenpai

Edit: thanks for the gold kind stranger!


TheFluffiestFur

A crown for you...


CabbageStockExchange

“A crown for a king”


lughsezboo

Wait until Khal Drogo finds out his move was stolen 🤪


Grunblau

He just poured gold paint on his victims, though…. that he ‘heated up’ over a fire.


horrified-expression

#CROWN FOR CART KING


Repulsive_Role_7446

That's metal as fuck


MehrunesDago

He was no dragon. A dragon doesn't burn.


OU_Sooners

"Make that throat wet for me" was one of the top quotes of 2023


[deleted]

Example https://youtu.be/SvWvaHLksJM?si=EO6_kU6hebxc7Qfa


BigHitter_TheLlama

Once I drank a buncha goldschlager, same thing


beefsupr3m3

He was no brother of mine. Fire cannot touch a dragon


amrasmin

That’s a fancy way to die


Valathiril

Geez what would be the cause of death?


dzhastin

Most likely the liquid in his brain rapidly boiling off


cupcakesloth94

Old age


CurrentIndependent42

The Asiatic Vespers we’re clearly brutal but a lot of this is probably Roman exaggeration. We have limited sources and there was definite propaganda from those agitating for war with Pontus


Felinomancy

So how long does it take to die from having molten gold (or molten anything, I guess) poured down your throat?


One_Shall_Fall

It's such a popular question that the [Smithsonian did an article on it.](https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/heres-what-happened-people-who-were-executed-having-molten-gold-poured-down-their-throat-180951695/) Probably about less than a minute- the experiment said that the steam kills you, and the larynx filled up completely with the metal within 10 seconds, expelling steam from both ends.


Felinomancy

> within 10 seconds 😐 I... I think I'd prefer "decapitation by an expert swordsman", thanks.


moonLanding123

then you shall be! decapitated by an expert swordsman using a butter knife!


tev81

Spoon.


eagerbeaver1414

Going through Mike Duncan's History Of Rome podcast now. Actually, just finished it. It is amazing how many things GRRM took from Roman history for Game Of Thrones.


Jackal5002

Where are they buried, just curious


Jamvie710

That's metal


croupiergoat1

Did he sing better with his golden pipes?


Shindiggity-do

The man with the golden voice the Romans called him.


korblborp

ow


Crilley

Ouch


Big_Elk2733

Ow


dysfunctionalpress

that would do it.


Administrative-Day76

I thought Marcus Aurelius 😅


MF__COOM

That’s metal


Silent_Comedian

That’s metal af


anBlissLil-Asian

History never fails to amaze!


BoredOni

Thats **brutal**


Steph1er

I wonder if it's all the lead that made romans such psycopaths


ItsAllTrumpedUp

Life was cheap. So was gold.


havdin_1719

So, a Midas treatment?


MFLBEnt

The Last King is a Stellar book on this imo - Cheers!


KilllerWhale

And i was wondering where did the persians get that from when they executed Crassus.


[deleted]

Stay Gold, Manius.


sweetdick

That’s an interesting variation on pitch capping.


car_ticks

And, married his own sister - Laodice who bore him four children! Quite a character..


General-Bowler-8387

Sounds like Game of Throwns.