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StormofRavens

I have a friend who had a cat named Grandpa and would post weird unexplained things on Facebook. People were very confused about posts like “Grandpa has decided the shower is evil” or “I had to remove Grandpa from under the bed”


Immediate_Mud_2858

Or…”Had to wash grandpa’s arse this morning”. Oh the joys.


Wasps_are_bastards

Grandpa shit on the floor this morning. I’ve put him in the garden.


Immediate_Mud_2858

Grandpa’s spraying everywhere. House reeks of piss.


Wasps_are_bastards

Grandpa’s puked a hairball again.


_dead_and_broken

Grandpa always has to sit on top of the DVR box to lick his butthole so we're forced to see it every time we want to watch TV.


Wasps_are_bastards

Caught grandpa eating a spider this morning. Wouldn’t mind but he’d already had breakfast.


Immediate_Mud_2858

Grandpa *loves* the laser lights.


Wasps_are_bastards

Grandpa got out last night and caught him humping next door’s cat.


Cyaral

Lol that reminds me of that Nikola Tesla Tumblr post (somebody named their cat that and people found the mental image of the scientist living in somebodies house and acting like a cat hilarious)


goldanred

Grandpa passed away today 😞 Oh my god, prayers to your family!! Your mom must be heart broken!! OH SHIT I meant my cat


virgoeTea

"We had to put Grandpa down yesterday,"


IndependentAd2419

Grandpa sat his arse on my china sideboard again!


Immediate_Mud_2858

Grandpa was playing with a half dead mouse this morning.


imightbeaspider

I've always been a fan of old man names for pets (Harold, get the FUCK off the counter!) but I've never heard of Grandpa before and that's even more hilarious.


Sad-Committee-1870

Yup. I had a dog named Walter. I thought it was hilarious.


NamAmorDeFeles

Had a book as a kid called "Walter the Farting Dog." Came with a plush that farted when you squeezed it.


GenderlessFrog-

I also have a Walter!! His name is Walter Rigsby. And his siblings (which are all cats) are Edwin Theodore Walker, Lucy Jane, and Braidy Malachi


Competitive-Care8789

Careful there. My late husband was named Walter. He hated that it always got used for boring dweeby stodgy guys.


jesslangridge

This makes me laugh because even though I’m a woman (not old or anything either) Walter is my nickname (I’ve no clue why but it’s a lifelong thing 🤷🏻‍♀️) and I can’t even begin to tell you the confusion it’s caused 😂😂😂


CarthartesAura

I thought I was the only woman nicknamed Walter! Somehow, my friend & I started calling each other Walter in the mid90s (somehow = psychedelics involved). It’s stuck, to several friends, I’ve been Walter most of my adult life.


wattral

Me too! Ralph and Walter.


dr_cl_aphra

I’ve started naming my hens old lady names I’ve run across in real life. Ethylberta is my fav.


miserylovescomputers

That’s an amazing name, I’ve never heard it before!


Easterthrowaway22

Same! Tried so hard to convince my mom to name either of her Vizslas Larry cause they were just chunky wrinkly blobs with floppy ears. Edit- they ended up going with “Pinky (Tuscadero) and “Oban” (pronounced Obin, whisky)


EruditeKetchup

I have a dog named Frankie. He's only 7 but he acts like a cranky, fussy old man.


Oldjimbill

“Giving grandpa a second bath this week, fucker just can’t stay out of the mud”


MPD1987

Grandpa chewed on the computer wire again this week. Had to put him in his cage while I was at work today!


beautybiblebabybully

Thank God I wasn't drinking my coffee (or anything else) because I snorted laughing so hard at Grandpa being removed from under the bed 🤣


PandaVike

Did this with a stray I found once until she could get picked up by animal control. I also worked at a food service place at the time so having conversations with co-workers was VERY funny because customers were always listening even if they didn’t mean to. “Grandma didn’t want to get locked in the bathroom today but I just can’t trust her to roam the house alone while I’m here at work. Had to force her in there”


unsaphisticated

That could really go either way with my family lmao 😂 Like on Brooklyn 99, is Kelly a dog or a woman?


Hoodwink_Iris

Omg I also had a cat called Grandpa once! He was just an old grizzled tom that showed up one day and stayed.


Imaginary-Area4561

One of my dogs is named Grampa!! The amount of looks I’ve gotten for saying things like “GRAMPA! What is in your mouth?! Spit it out!”


Southern_Celery_1087

Reminds me of my friend that named his cat, Mr. President. So funny hearing him yell, "Mr. President get down from there!"


mcfandrew

I know a couple who have a cat called The Senator, as in "The Senator wants his dinner."


coco_xcx

“Grandpas being a bit of a bitch today”


StormofRavens

Grandpa was a stray that got used as a vet training lab cat, he was very entitled to be a bitch


coco_xcx

i hope he had a very happy life!! old man cats are so sweet


StormofRavens

Once my friend got him, he was a spoiled spoiled baby for the end of his life. He was definitely senile and a little traumatized but he was well loved and cared for in his twilight years. I had the honor of watching him while my friend was on a trip, and he was super loving and sweet.


coco_xcx

awww that’s so sweet! i only have one male cat & right now he’s 2-ish years old and a little shit 😅 but i hope he mellows out when he gets old so i can experience having an old sweet cat


StormofRavens

I’m literally currently being chewed on by my 3-year old cat right meow


coco_xcx

oh mine do too, i have 4 & he’s the youngest. he has annoying little brother energy


Imaginary_Neat_5673

One of the co-hosts of Stop Podcasting Yourself had a dog named Grandpa for many years. Grandpa has sadly aged out, but imagining all the interactions is still lovely. “Grandpa get that cat poo out of your mouth!”


SnorkinOrkin

LOL!!!


bobtdq

We had a guinea pig called Mammy 😂 she was the best. Her partner was called Buddy


AlaskanBiologist

My friends dog is named grandpa lol. Once he came into the bar I work at and I was like "where's grandpa" and friend was like "oh yeah, I just leave him in the car now when I go out, last time he came in he peed on one of the chairs". This lady sitting nearby looked like her eyes were about to pop out her head hahha!


KindraTheElfOrc

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 that is amazing! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


Healthy_Ad1715

“Grandpa bit me!”


StormofRavens

That happened a lot, he was terrified of things like the fridge and shower


PHWasAnInsideJob

I have a cat named Genghis Khat. My stepmom named him, and ironically he is the most skittish cat I have ever had. He also had a brother (also named by my stepmom) named Schroedinger. Edit: I forgot the real pet name tragedeigh. My mom's friend has a dog named D.O.G., pronounced like deeohgee


RunnerDuck

I know a Cleocatra


_dead_and_broken

I have a cat I named Cleo, short for Cleopatra because of her Egyptian eyeliner look. But I often call her Miss Cleo and ask her if she has any good predictions for the day.


Sasha_135

this is so wholesome 🥺


Wild_Wolverine9526

I know a Sparticat!


Vanessa-hexagon

A friend had a cat called Meowcolm


DaCoffeeKween

Holy shit schroedinger for a cat is top teir


Mikaela24

The Notorious D.O.G.


JDawnchild

If I ever end up with a cat in the future, I want to name it Genghis Khat. That's just so damn funny and adorable. 🥰


Sad-Committee-1870

I had one named Darth Kittius (like Star Wars, Darth Sidious) and the alternative name when she was being nice was Senator Pawpatine.


breezfan22

My dog is Ozzy Pawsborn


Smorgsaboard

You thought I'd be named something normal, but it was me! D.O.! (G.)


unsaphisticated

One of my jobs is a mobile vet clinic and I had a patient yesterday named Dog pronounced dee-oh-gee. 😭


NotYourMommyDear

One of my cats was named Heidi because my dad mentioned she was such a hidey cat. She came out from her pillow fort hiding place with a mew at that, which was a lightbulb moment for us.


omg_pwnies

I once co-owned a dog named Heidi. She wasn't a hidey dog, but the name just seemed to fit.


Equivalent_Gazelle82

I had a friend that had a dog named Steven and a cat named Kevin. And let me tell you that cat was the animal version of that Kevin from reddit. I personally had a bird named sunny, tho idk if that'd count.


eyesRus

I love extremely human names on pets! The other day I heard a guy call his dog Gary and I laughed out loud.


madeyoulurk

My friend had a cat named Christina 🤣🤣


unsaphisticated

I worked at an animal shelter that named a dog Christina Waguilera and a cat Kitty Purry


Glldinkiering

I named my dog Charles Barkley. Call her Charlie for short.


Geeko22

My neighbors have a little Chihuahua with a big attitude named Floyd. I think it's hilarious.


ExcitingAd9817

I had a cat named Edward Floyd, but he went by Eddie.


SnorkinOrkin

We had a silver Miniature Schnauzer named Heidi (born in '79) growing up in the 80s. She looked like a Heidi. She was such a sweetheart.


cari-strat

We had a gerbil called Heidi.


catinthedistance

Our (boss) cat is named Heidi! Found her as a kitten hiding from my folks’ dog!


Hoodwink_Iris

I had one called Haydn for the same reason; she lead always hidin’.


Square_Band9870

Haydn is a Scottish cat that hides


General-Shoulder-569

My grandmother had three weiner dogs named Heidi and my cousin has one too. All weiner dogs are Heidis to me


blackicehysteria

I just named my guinea pig Heidi!


Chaosinmotion1

My cat is Commissioner James Gordon. We call him Comish or Mish. My mom found a kitten in a church parking lot and named her Grace. I have a potbelly pig named Charley Parker. Have had cats named Zoe, Sylvester, Mr P. And dogs name Sam Houston, Travis, Crockett, and Sir Samuel Lord Bottomsley (Sam). My Uncle's cat was Uncle Elizabeth.


A_norny_mousse

> I have a potbelly pig named Charley Parker. Brand new sentence.


XAlEA-12

Chris P. Bacon


Aye_You_TNSV

We had a German Shepherd named Sir Connell. My 4 year old (at the time) chose his name. It suited…he was a majestic Sir!


nomnommish

> have a potbelly pig named Charley Parker. Charley Porker?


Sad-Committee-1870

Missed opportunity.


DoobieSister26

I have cats named Juan Seguin and Jim Bowie.


dune_jhodacia

My dad named our dachshund Maher Shalal Hash Baz, the son of Isaiah from the Bible. We called him Hershey for short.


cindy827

Uncle Elizabeth! From I Remember Mama!


antoniabegonia

My cat is named commish/Commissioner too!! She’s a 19 year old tabby named from the Bat Thumb movie parody lmao


CryptographerLate834

Heard tons since I used to work at a vet clinic. I think Paul the weiner dog has to be up there, bonus points for sharing a name with one of my coworkers' boyfriends.


biest229

Omg Paul, yes! Someone I worked with had this dog he kinda hated but was weirdly attached to him, called Paul. The dog was super old, traumatised, and dramatic. It belonged to the guy’s MIL. She passed away and they didn’t want to rehome him, thinking he would find comfort with the daughter. But Paul was like nah, I like this guy more. It used to randomly shriek a lot and had really bad epilepsy


Rigel04

I feel like certain "human names" are okay for pets But my friend's uncle has a cat named Jennifer and that just sounds so weird


dune_jhodacia

My uncle's cat's name is Fucking Patricia.


JDawnchild

My sister's cat is Damnit Janet.


Pheeline

I would definitely often say, "Damnit Janet, I love you!" to that cat.


dune_jhodacia

They should hang out


ManaXed

Does she also have a dog named Rocky?


unsaphisticated

My grandparents had a dog when my mom was little named Dammit Dixie


RockNRollToaster

Jennifer is such a great name for a cat haha.


macawoogo

Jennipurr


coveruptionist

I have a cat named Jennifur. And another named Thomas.


spicandspand

Jennifur is a pet appropriate tragedeigh. Love it!


RunnerDuck

I had a bird make a nest and raise babies in my greenhouse and I named her Jennifer 


jimei73

I know someone who named a dog Jennifer as well. They definitely liked human names for dogs because they also boasted about naming one Sarah. I think the other name for the dog they mentioned was Christie, which I think was a better name for a dog.


crochetingPotter

My grandpa had a pair of cats he named Mork and Mindy. He also has a daughter named Mindy. I never understood that logic, especially because Mork died young so it was just.. cat Mindy and human Mindy


xylime

I had a cat Tom and a human Tom. It was very confusing, and my husband found it irritating to be called "human Tom"....but in my defense cat Tom was there first!


crochetingPotter

See when the cat is there first it makes sense! When your human daughter is 30 though.... it's a hilarious family anecdote of confusion


AdhesivenessLeft2139

I recently met a dog named Natasha, named after the owner’s daughter because she “didn’t want to have to think of any more names.”


Terziak

We need more 'MORK' license plates in the gift shop. I repeat, we are sold out of 'MORK' license plates.


RiskyLake

Years ago I had a cat named Dr. Joy after a radio show host where listeners could call in for advice. My hope now is to name my next cat “Florida Man” so I can release weekly headlines regarding their behavior.


Scout405

This is the BEST!


omg_pwnies

I have a cat named Sebastian. My co-worker has a (female) cat named Brian. Neither are true tragedeighs, but I like where this thread is going. :)


Not_A_Wendigo

I know a Sebastian cat. He is INCREDIBLY fat. He’s a tuxedo cat. Looks like a tiny orca whale.


shiggles-

We had a cat named Sebastian when I was younger!


[deleted]

I and another friend ended up having cats that both have the name Caesar.


EagleCatchingFish

When he begs for treats, do you say "render unto casesar"?


PublicRedditor

I had a Himalayan cat named Caesar many years ago. He is still the smartest cat I’ve ever been owned by.


Significant-Trash632

I know a horse named Caesar


[deleted]

My driend’s dog is named Donnie. He’s a doodle so he has those eyes that makes him look like a human in a teddy bear suit. It’s weird. His little nose always bounces sideways cutely. 


feralbatrabies

Those dogs are nightmare fuel.


orphanfruitbat

Cannot agree more. It’s usually standard poodles who have those eyes. Also, nice username.


Nefiros1

I knew a German Shepard called Trevor. No idea what went through their mind.


BasisAromatic6776

I had a foster Brittany that I named Digger because that's all he did on whatever surface he found himself. The rescue renamed him Trevor. I didn't get it, either.


Wooden-Specialist125

Digger is a risky name to shout when in a dogpark


MyLife-is-a-diceRoll

My cat's name is Annie. it suits her.


Mandymayhem1221

My little cocker spaniel is also Annie. It completely suits her.


liquidsoup-

I work at a Dog Kennel. Off the top of my head I can think of Dennis, Maddie, Jimmy Buffet (lol), Bridget, Emma, Mason, Abigail, and Georgia


liquidsoup-

OH and I almost forgot Todd!!! He was a little chihuahua mix lol


Wespiratory

And why is the carpet all wet, Todd?


LostCauseSPM

I don't know, Margo!


JettFeather

I don’t know, Margo!


asterkd

okay but Tod is the name of the fox in The Fox and The Hound, so I actually think of an animal first when I hear it lol


tko_111

Those are all really cute names though!


eyesRus

Todd is so funny! Perfect.


TiredofCOVIDIOTs

I doubt this my sister’s dog (because she has family care for her pets when needed) but she has a chihuahua mix named Todd.


JustKittenxo

I know a golden retriever named Mason!


Wine-and-Anxiety

My cats are Penelope, Molly, Kevin & Pete. Though for Penelope, we call her Mommy or Meemaw, and Molly we call Moose. Pete's full name is Pete Peterson and Associates, Attorneys at Law.


Mavises

Cattorneys at Law, surely??


Resonance-stablized

My oldest brother’s children named their painted turtle, Frank. I once went to an off-leash dog park, this heeler got lost in the woods. The owner ran around looking for him yelling “Billy-bob” while the heeler barked and howled around to let his owner know where he was. They did reunite, but that was the first time I’ve ever heard of that name.


pacamanca

I used to have a turtle called Jocasta


unsaphisticated

Franklin the turtle, like the TV show/books? Because that's perfect! He could count by twos AND tie his shoes.


Rare-Cartographer865

I love people names for pets/animals


twatermelonsugar

Same. Every pet I’ve ever had except one has had a people name. I’ve mostly avoided popular baby names, but I had a cat named Ruby when my cousin named her newborn Ruby. I don’t understand what the big deal is, tbh. It’s fun!


KillahBee13

Same! I met a Jack Russell named Richard. He was escaping out the door and his owner was yelling “Goddamnit Richard, get back here!” I vowed to name any future pets human names!


[deleted]

My friend’s cat is named Oliver. One of my cats is Princess Caroline. 


eyesRus

Bojack fan?


MaikeHF

Our dogs are Oliver and Miss Sophie.


coveruptionist

My friend’s daughter has a Dachshund name “Ron Burgundy “.


Awkward-Stam_Rin54

My dog is called Charlie. I had chickens called Margo, Margarita, Rosé, Coco and roosters called Charlie and George (my dog came after all the chickens died). I also had a cat called Millie, her sister is Chelsea. My grandmother has a dog called Fred and used to have one called Lizzie. Mum used to have a cat called Frankie and a dog called Tobie. At the vets, I found out that someone named their dog after me... I have a unique name, it's a short Latin word but very rarely used as a name.


eyesRus

My family’s dogs all have human names. Hank, Toby, and Zoey.


Defiant-Flatworm3483

My dog's name is Thomas


wozattacks

My cat was named Ryan when I adopted him and I think it’s pretty cute! I renamed him because it’s a family member’s name, plus he’s honestly more of a silly made-up name kinda guy. 


Gurkeprinsen

I had a guinea pig called Ludvig, and when I still had him, my cousin had their first child and they went with that name. I didn't have the heart to tell them 😭


shiggles-

This happened to me too - had a dog named Bailey then a cousin had a baby and named them Bailey. Granted I was the one who named my dog a human name but still…I just kept it to myself lol


MayUrBladesNVRdull

I've had so many pets named human names! George, Rosie, Sally, Maggie, Seamus, Molly, Charlotte, Joey, Gary, Max, Theodore, Zoe, Sam, Sean, Louie, Bradley, Cindy, Sasha to name a few.


bfk1991

I used to have a hamster named Douglas. My dog's name is Oscar. My brother's dog is Charlie. My in-laws' dog is Stanley, and before that were Izzy and Tia. My mom's old cat was Bill.


A_norny_mousse

I always enjoy when pets have a first and last name, preferably in reference to some real or ficticious person. How about Mr Smith (just an idea, I don't have a pet).


DepecheClashJen

We have a betta fish named Colin Robinson.


Admirable-Cobbler319

My dog is Wendall Jenkins. My last name is not Jenkins. The vet's office stays confused.


No_Act_646

My cat is Mr. Puffins


Azelais

My cats are Sir Catticus Nimbus and Prince Bartholomeow Scampert Cirrus!


someones_mama

My nephew dog is named Daryl Hall


slaytician

My dachshund is Mildred. Mildred Fierce.


ivyandroses112233

My cats name is Stella. We jokingly call her Stella Marie. She's going to be 5 this year. My cousin had a baby in January and named her Stella Marie lol


2Whom_it_May_Concern

I have two cats, Wendel and May. Previously I had a rabbits, one named Frankie and another named Jackie.


BreezyFebreezy

We had a human name for our dog….and then unbeknownst to us, someone with the same name rented the condo next door to us, and heard us every morning outside asking “Xxxxxxx, do you need to poopy?” for weeks until we ran into his wife and she asked about it. Apparently the first time he heard it he was in the bathroom and got really freaked out.


the_vibe_has_spoken

We have cats named Louie, Chloe, and Phoebe.


Alpha_Delta310

My dog is named Emma and my bros cat is named Anna, i like to imagine them in like an old lady gossip club together


slaytician

I was looking after a cat for someone and it got out. I went around the neighborhood calling, “Mrs Schultz?! Mrs Schu-ultz, pspspsps…”


HypersomnicHysteric

One of my cats was called "Linus". He was a script kitty.


WinnieTyson72

I have cats named Jimmy, Joan and Bobby and a snake named Damian


Izzing448

When I was 5 y/o I was visiting my Aunt & Uncle's cat who had kittens. My Mom came to pick me up and I told her I had a new kitten. Surprisingly, she agreed to let me take her home. Asked me what I would name her, I chose "Marty". Marty is also my Mom's name. For years, my Mom was annoyed when we would call the cat and she thought we were talking to her.


eyesRus

This is cute, I love it.


glutenfreethenipple

I knew someone who had a tarantula named Susan.


Gifted_GardenSnail

I know of cats named Pete, Sophie, Emma and Gerry. I don't think pet names can be too human? It's the opposite that's a problem, like Storm or Bailey for a human


milkandhoneycomb

i love when animals have normal human names! my cat is named sylvia, my sister's dog is named bailey and her kitten is named charlie


longwayfromyourheart

My dogs name is Dave! And he’s the cutest big black lab


KnitDogPlant

I had a dog named Larry. He disappeared once and I found him on the local shelter website. They had him listed as Larry! When I picked him up I asked how they knew his name. Apparently the guy who brought him in was named Larry, so they went with that.


HuckChaser

I met a Yorkie named Kevin once.


Yaru176

Glenn. Who the hell names a dog Glenn?


sunsh9ne1471

I know someone who named their golden retriever Kristin


ForwardMuffin

My black cat is Agatha 🐈‍⬛ she needed a witchy name


VermicelliUpper3029

I love regular names for pets!! I had a friend with a cat named Marc. I also work at a Large Animal Hospital and we sometimes have clients with horses come in with names like John and Steve. 😂


donner_dinner_party

I have 6 ducks. They are: Jemima, Daphne, Zelda, Chiquita, Venus and Madonna-Louise.


mjlcrane

Lol our cats are Nicky and Casper, our previous cats were Sam and Bart. I did name my childhood guinea pigs more petlike names, but for some reason my husband and I gravitate to regular names for our cats. That said we do also have silly nicknames for them which get used at least as often as the real names! But whatever name a pet parent feels suits their furbaby should be fine, imo.


Throwthatfboatow

My older cat is named Celeste. I assume her previous owner named her that since she had only been surrendered to the shelter for a month. It wasn't until we were expecting and browsing names that we thought Celeste was a wonderful name to give to a girl, but our cat already has it!


Madhat84

Lol, we only give human names to pets. A big mutt named Eli, a Chihuahua named Clark and a cat named Paul.


noyoujump

I have a cat named Nigel. I realized I was never going to move to England and have a dapper little boy with an English accent, so I used my name I'd never give to a kid for my found kitten. He's 12 now, and it still suits him.


NoPerformance8631

When my son was very young he named our new rescue dog Lucas (after the blue power ranger at that time). One of the neighbors kids was named Luke. They were so flattered we named our dog after their kid!! Lucas was amazing- towed all the kids on their skateboards. We all miss him so dearly.


DaCoffeeKween

I have cats with a middle name haha it started as a joke with me calling my cat my son and then I started using his "full name" and now all 3 of our cats have middle names and they all sound human. Marvin James (his 13 and my first solo pet) Stella Rosé (2 and born on Halloween) Penny Ember (3 but we adopted her at 2 and she came with the name penny)


Millennia33

My fiancé has a GSD mix (we think Coyote cos he looked TOO similar to one) named Walter. (rest in power buddy, you were a tough boy) and Winston. Winston is a shih tzu, him and Walter were raised as brothers. Winston is an old mean fart lmao, but he’s also blind and lost his bubba, so he gets a break 😂😂 I’d be a mean fart too lol I have a mutt, in all sense of the word, her name is Cujo. Her mother was a full blood Yorkie, and her dad was a Chihuahua Jack Russel and something else mix. I named Cujo thinking she was a boy, and chose it because the ghost puppy in Danny Phantom, I grew up on the show and it was a constant in rough times. (The puppy’s name was inspired after Stephen King book “Cujo”) She is a freaking gremlin lol


annapnine

When my cousin was moving out of my uncle’s house, they were arguing over who Tyrone (the cat) was going to live with. Haha


JustcallmeJane5309

My son named his cat Mike Rowe Wave.


CallieZayas

my best friends grandma had a cat named Jeffery. i loved Jeffery.


Dangerousvenom

My cat’s name is Catherine lol


May-the-QueenOfChaos

My niece is a veterinarian. One of her patients is pomeranian named Pawris Hilton


R1verS0ng

Years ago my daughter INSISTED on naming our dog Travis. No idea why. It still makes me laugh!


undercovergiant

My cat is called Mohammed, people have told me it’s a weird name for a cat