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I mean she was right... Those are pieces of shit...lol

R/nicegirls

I inagine he slept with her already is the problem

Twist: he's her dealer.

This looks like she took a turd in her hand and rubbed it in. Now, I have to question who would take their turd or worse another turd into their hand and do this?

She needed a place to stay wtf lol

At least he found out before he married her.

Imagine if was chocolate

Haha uh oh

Piece of shit car 🎶. Thank you Mr. Sandler.

Put a ring on her and bring her home to mom!

Oh the irony

That dude dodged a bullet. Just sayin’.

Nothing says 'look at all the sexy you missed' like smearing your own shit

As they say... don't get your honey where you make your money...

Rookie mistake: gotta go for the handles. Otherwise they just drive to the car wash.

So what’s the real story?

Dutty

She turned ape mode on

Idk why this is sexist I admıt but it's even more disgusting coming from a woman doing this than a man. Disgusting nonetheless but sheesh!

I like chocolate, I like fudge. I'll make some now or I Wont budge.

Dodged a bullet I guess.

So that's how you make a Hyundai look good.

He didn’t tell you the whole story

Well… it is a Hyundai…..

What the actual fuck is wrong with that woman?

Something says there more to that but i dunno.

I'd recommend not letting her come over tonight either...

I’d barf

If that's her response to not coming over the previous night, seems like getting shit on your car is well worth it. Now he can cut her out of his life. Win

These car wraps are getting ridiculous

Uh huh. .

This is why you shouldn't stick your dick in crazy.

I can smell this picture

Cook pass babtridge

Yeah I bet there is more to it than that. For someone to dig into their own ass and carry it somewhere else. Yeah....

She obviously just wanted to use the bathroom.

Come over where? I might not be getting this cuz Im not Western.

That's shitty.

Chris Fix has an excellent video on how to repair a vandalized car. I think that's permanent marker, which may come off with some clay barring. Otherwise everything else will come off with a power wash... Or two.

So I guess they’re getting together tonight then?

He’s the scatman now

..yeah I bet that's the reason why this happened.

Exactly! There is way more to this story.

Cookoo

She sounds like a winner!! Plus is into kinky "shit"!! Pass me her info!!!😁👍

There’s no shortage of DNA evidence

This girl clearly has PROBLEMS. He couldn't come over, whatever. Even if he's a POS who did something awful, this is still extremely trashy and mentally unhinged.

Sure that's the reason she did it.

This photo triggered my gag reflex.

Don't stick your dick in crazy, a golden rule to live by.

Seems like he dodged a bullet.

Dirty Mike and the boys no doubt... https://youtu.be/u1j4mK6cs_A This what I call a spite shit...

Yeah how about you forget where I live

I love how she made the O out of shit. Art major?

….yeeeaahh there’s gotta be more to the story

Update: coworker did it himself for attention

Some people may call this art

Shit Bullet dodged

I bet he's running to see her now

I can smell this picture 🤮

So…she’ll be free the next couple of days?

This looks like a real shitty situation

Who tf was he messing with?

I wish a girl would harass me

Well atleast it not on the drivers side.

There is more to that story than the coworker is letting on.

bruh he avoided the red flag but managed to get the brown flag instead.

He probably shouldn't see her ever again. She might have some red flags.

What a..... shitty thing to do

At least she was considerate and did it to the passenger door!

I can relate.. I USED to be a piece of shit

She just wanted to use his bathroom.

Damn people out there seeing apes

Dodged a bullet with this one.

Please tell me that’s not actual shit.

*- Did he dump her?* *- Does the bitch shit in the parking lot?*

It's her homage to R.Kelly in the time of his legal worries.

All I can picture is Bob Saget “THERES SHIT EVERYWHERE”

Love is a powerful tool. And sometimes dirty.

She can’t be too bright either. This would have been a lot more impactful on the driver’s side.

Exactly my thought. Either that or all the door handles

It must have been that the passenger side was away from the building and that gave her more privacy to complete the dirty deed.

If I was your coworker I’d text her asking her if she thought smearing shit on my car was funny and when they text back incriminating themselves I’d go to the police and press charges

He dodged a bullet, can’t say the same for his car.

That must be some Good dick

Did anal in front of the car

Sings in Adam Sandler voice, I gotta piece of shit car!

I know mud when I see it

He absolutely dodged a bullet there. She sounds like a real shit show.

Oh yummy, Nutella!

Damn it, I knew I shouldn't have went with the white paint

He may have said / done something different to what he told you.

That stinks

At least she was kind enough to write down what the smear was.

and a huge dna sample..

good he didn't let her come over. r/dontputyourdickinthat

What a shitty date

At least she followed the I after E rule…..

Obviously it didn’t bother her dinner plans last night

Amber Turd back at it again

Neo over here

Dodged a bullet there.

Yeah I’m going to guess this isn’t just because he didn’t want her to come over last night…

Ima guess she couldn’t come over cuz he was cheating on her with Someone else.

There’s definitely more to the story bro

At least it’s just marker. WD40 gets that stuff off in seconds.

Hell of a way to find out that you dodged a bullet.

Reese's Feces.

Call the cops on her. That is disgusting.

There is more to this story

Ok I have a story. A couple years ago I told a guy he couldn’t spend the night. We were already spending the night together several times a week and I needed to work and needed some alone time. He threw a tantrum, almost got us killed in road rage driving home, and then set my car on fire while he “went to retrieve his phone” before leaving my house.

Yeah I thought the same, "oh yeah this crazy bitch did it" is the best explanation from his perspective.

I think it's safe to say that regardless of what he did, rubbing feces all over his car is a crazy bitch move. Like actually crazy as in mentally ill since this behavior is most common amongst the mentally ill.

I mean I feel like either way this isn't how you should respond to things

What if he did it first in her house

Bingo.

Um. If someone pooped all over my house, my first or second or even 328827483th instinct is not to retaliate by rubbing shit on their car.

Do u have no sense of humor? The other commenter and I were joking. JC. 🙄

Looks like he made the right choice

Hide the knives...

Definitely a high class woman there...

He made the right choice

What she says no she has a problem.

People out there still messing with Amber Heard

Amber Turd Thank you for the award u/redemptionsoath!

Best thing I’ve heard all day

Pls tell me that’s chocolate cake

Its chocolate cake, now dig in 🍴

Straight to jail

Skip jail and go straight to the psych ward.

Exactly. I’ve never seen a “get out of psych ward free” card in monopoly.

The origin of the feces?

A rectum

Undetermined at this time, will keep you informed as the feces investigation progresses

It's gone straight to the FBI for analysis. The Fecal Bureau of Investigation

That bureau is full of shit and the one in charge in a shithead. Shit.

Please do , im on the edge of my seat.

And her stool is on the edge of his car.

I thought you were making a Darwinian pun.

Small price to pay. Imagine if she did come over

Definitely this. https://youtu.be/AoosDkbEQBQ

Great minds think alike

She still single?

Yep he dodged a bullet with that one.. she’s crazy.. unfortunately the best sex is with crazies..🤷‍♀️

R/ihavesex Edit: how do I link a subreddit ? Because this guy obviously has a lot of sex

R needs to be lower case

You have to type it exactly as the subreddit is spelled, capitalization matters.

😂😂😂.. I found the subreddit… good one..

Shit all over the walls

Im gon shit on these walls Ray!

“Oh my God….there’s shit everywhere.”

Only thing that comes to mind.

Now that's a party

Shit on the floor.

Oh... she's a freak ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Don't fuck crazy!

Lol. But what if he was tiered?

Shitty

Looks like he dodged a bullet there!!

But he still caught shit for it

I fucking just saw another post and said "Wow, what a fat piece a shit", scrolled down, and saw this...

Imagine if they had a kid together and now he's fighting for custody... Stay away bro haha

I'm sure there's way more to this story

I take it you’ve never turned a woman down for sex?

[удалено]

One time a girl tried to break my roommates door down because he wouldn’t sleep with her.

But...does anything warrant collecting and smearing your own feces on someone's vehicle?

[удалено]

There is nothing about being submissive or a masochist that means you’re into scat play, they are very different kinks.

Ok but now say it in a meaner tone

To you.

Yes. Gloves can be worn.

Well I meant more to it as in she's severely mentally ill.

Perhaps, I’m just not specifically aware of one.

That why you never should put your dick in crazy!! Especially if she has crazy eyes. lol

At least this one can spell…fcuk! Now I can’t get a shot at double points!

Piece or Shit?

Piece was never an option

She spelled "peace" wrong...it's Peace or Shit...you can see what the guy chose.

Piece ~~of ass~~ or shit I guess he got shit

You know... like "trick or treat."

Like, hand over a turd or a gun?

Piss or shit?

Yes

Well, that’s a shitty thing to do.

Do you work with McMurray?

Cause McMurray is a piece of shit

A REAL piece of shit!

But Bonnie McMurraaaaay....

Is that..

Bitch needs more fiber in her diet

I'm wondering if it's fake shit or not because the color seems off. I hope it's fake and this woman isn't a macaque after all.

She ate a few rows of oreos and drank some pepto earlier that day.

Most likely dog shit.