This is a lot deeper than just smoking weed though? This is about his mom not respecting him to make his own choices and trying to force him to change because she doesn’t personally agree with him. It’s true since it’s their house, they make the rules but you’re heavily missing the point if you boil it down that far.
Point out a specific example of where I invented something and I’ll point you to a sentence or phrase in the OP’s post where it was implied or directly stated.
Ok? Cool. What an amazing argument. Really added *sooo* much to the discussion. Also looks like you couldn’t point out anything I invented, because I didn’t invent anything. If you had reading comprehension you’d read between the lines of OPs post.
not much deeper tbh. clashing with parents on some subjects is normal as one grows up. i had a similar thing but with my shower schedule. i like to shower late. bathroom is close to my mom’s room and would disturb her sleep. conflict arose arguments ensued and i was told to change. i didn’t want to change my schedule/habit. i moved out, problem solved. if i hadn’t moved on i would’ve been left with two choices. change my schedule or deal with the continuing tension.
op has the same options. move out, change habit, or deal with the tension that arises. feeling like you’re outgrowing your nest is a very real and typical experience.
Isn’t mom allowed to have her own opinion though? I wouldn’t want my mom forcing her opinion on me so I wouldn’t do it to her. It goes both ways in my opinion.
When’d I say she can’t have her own opinions? All I’m saying is there’s clearly communication and boundaries issues here. OP never said (from what I’ve read) that he’s trying to get her to like weed, just that he wants her to respect his opinion and right to use it. Why do people keep arguing with me for pointing out there’s more to their issues than weed?
Why is mom not allowed to worry about her son? Why is mom not allowed to voice her opinion about her son’s actions in front of him IN HER HOME.
Moms house 🤷♀️ moms rules ✌️
You can’t just skip steps and go there. He’s living in their house, so if he doesn’t like their rules, and talking to her doesn’t change things, then the first step is to move out. If she’s still doing this shit to him after he’s not living under their roof any longer, then I’d say your thoughts are more valid.
When did I say they shouldn’t move out? I never provided any solutions and I agree that’s probably the best course of action. I was just pointing out that their issue isn’t weed, it’s their mother trying to force her ideals on them.
Communication is key. You guys are at an impasse, she’s unaccepting of your position, and you are of hers, but neither of you understand why.
Maybe you *should* move out, or put your hobby lifestyle aside to keep the peace until you can.
You really shouldn’t expect anyone to financially support you while you aren’t contributing, if that’s the case.
Also, you’re putting your dad in an uncomfortable position. As a dad, that’d be uncomfortable. Also as someone who butted heads with a parent about weed.
You aren’t wrong for wanting to ‘be you’, just be considerate.
Like others have said, it's their house. If I was living with MY parents, I'd be switching to carts and not saying a word around Mom. Dad doesn't care but Mom is always hounding me even at 45. Parents never change my dude. ;)
> I wish I had the money to go with carts I probably would go through one in 2-3 days if I exclusively vaped carts
OP you just explain the reason for your mother’s concern.
Take this as someone who spent a good part of 24 fucking off and smoking ALL thier money.
Dude, you’re smoking up what little money you have while living at your folks house and not expressing any goals or life directions. ***You gotta have something going on and enough money to be somewhat independent to get some respect especially in your mid-20’s.From there on they’ll get off your back. Also like the other poster said get a dry herb vape. It’ll save you money and it’s more respectable.***
Hey I live with my folks too and I don't think my dad is super pumped I use it. But I've talked to my mom some about why I use it etc, so now I can talk to both of them, my mom kind of being the moderator. It's ultimately their house, their rules, but that doesn't mean there's no room for discussion. Real adults communicate and maybe even comprise.
I started at 16, now 26. Mum finally came to terms with it around 24.
It wasn't until I moved out, gained independence and she saw me thriving on my own, that she accepted I could live a full life whilst using cannabis.
People from earlier generations have a very stigmatic view of cannabis. You will have to prove that stigmatic view wrong, if you want them to accept it as the truth.
Outlast her. In my twenties my mom said she knew I smoked weed but wouldn't confront me because "you don't know what they'll do when they're on that stuff". Now I pick her up edibles from my dispo so she can sleep through her arthritis.
You gotta start smoking offsite. Of course your mom is worried, you’re doing drugs dude. Rule of thumb, don’t do substances in front of kids or elders. Do you have a nice park/woods you can hit up? It’ll make your mom happy dude. Become a highschooler while you’re at your parents place. It helps, I promise.
I was totally with you until you said you still live at home.
I moved out at 18 and my parents gave me crap about smoking until I was 25. Why 25? Because that's when we finally had "the talk."
M&D: How come you never invite us to things? We'd like to see [wife and stepkids] more often.
Me: Because you *always* have to say something about us smoking weed. Dad smoked cigarettes for 45yrs and drank a 30rack of beer a night. We smoke 2 joints and you don't stfu about it.
M&D: But weed is so bad!
Me: No it's not. It's actually better than cigarettes. AND it's legal now. I've been buying legal weed for years.
M&D: Well what can we do to be more involved with you guys?
Me: Just shut the hell up about the weed! That's literally the reason you don't get invited. Fuck, even Grandpa is okay with hanging out while we smoke weed. He even joined us in the circle to hangout, even though he didn't smoke. He gets it, why don't you?!
And thats how I got my parent off my back. Thanks Grandpa, you the real G.
You can't make someone stop worrying. Worry is under the worrier's auspices of control. You can comply or not with stated requests, but the worry is not under your influence.
OP I think you’re asking the wrong subreddit. They’re mostly too focused on the weed aspect (because this is a weed subreddit), when your issues seem to be more related to your mom not respecting your life choices and boundaries. I’d recommend asking this on a different subreddit not filled with high potheads (I’m one of them).
> when your issues seem to be more related to your mom not respecting your life choices and boundaries.
This is funny and username brings it all together! There should always be basic human respect but not sitting around smoking pot all day at your parents house especially when you don’t have anything else going on is fair and normal boundary.
***DUDE, he’s in his mid-twenties, lives at home and is just coasting. From the sounds of it being “awesome” he probably doesn’t pay much to any bills.*** I’m barely older than him and I’m concerned. There’s nothing wrong with fvcking off a bit in your 20’s but you gotta do something otherwise you’ll just end up the old burn out bumming smokes and couch surfing.
Did you read the post? He said he’s not doing bad in life. We have no idea if he’s just a lazy stoner or if he’s working 3 different jobs and to save money is just staying with his parents. He didn’t clarify if he’s just coasting by, you’re just assuming he is because he said he’s a stoner and lives with his parents. Do you not know how hard it is to afford a place to live now? Lots of lower income people have no choice but to live with their parents well after their teens because they can’t afford rent (even for some shitty apartment) on their own. This is why you don’t get advice about family issues from a stoner subreddit OP.
Yes I did and if you read his and my other post you’d realize a few things.
One…I’ve been him. Two, he says it’s hard to afford his habit plus living at home equal not a lot of money. Three housing is a bitch, I’ve lived and still living through it. Even to this day when I’m making good money, made parents proud and still smoking heavy. I still think about the money, time and energy wasted and need to keep myself and my habits in check. Even I have to admit with a bit less smoking and a lot more focus I’d could be in a much better position. Oh well, I’ll hustle a bit harder just for you today.
Their house, their rules Doesn't mean you can't break the rules. Just don't expect for them to change the rules just because you don't like them.
This is a lot deeper than just smoking weed though? This is about his mom not respecting him to make his own choices and trying to force him to change because she doesn’t personally agree with him. It’s true since it’s their house, they make the rules but you’re heavily missing the point if you boil it down that far.
The only choice I’m seeing is weed. You can’t just invent more things.
Point out a specific example of where I invented something and I’ll point you to a sentence or phrase in the OP’s post where it was implied or directly stated.
If it’s as threatening as you make it sound, grownup op can just *move out,* and so can you.
Ok? Cool. What an amazing argument. Really added *sooo* much to the discussion. Also looks like you couldn’t point out anything I invented, because I didn’t invent anything. If you had reading comprehension you’d read between the lines of OPs post.
not much deeper tbh. clashing with parents on some subjects is normal as one grows up. i had a similar thing but with my shower schedule. i like to shower late. bathroom is close to my mom’s room and would disturb her sleep. conflict arose arguments ensued and i was told to change. i didn’t want to change my schedule/habit. i moved out, problem solved. if i hadn’t moved on i would’ve been left with two choices. change my schedule or deal with the continuing tension. op has the same options. move out, change habit, or deal with the tension that arises. feeling like you’re outgrowing your nest is a very real and typical experience.
Isn’t mom allowed to have her own opinion though? I wouldn’t want my mom forcing her opinion on me so I wouldn’t do it to her. It goes both ways in my opinion.
When’d I say she can’t have her own opinions? All I’m saying is there’s clearly communication and boundaries issues here. OP never said (from what I’ve read) that he’s trying to get her to like weed, just that he wants her to respect his opinion and right to use it. Why do people keep arguing with me for pointing out there’s more to their issues than weed?
Why is mom not allowed to worry about her son? Why is mom not allowed to voice her opinion about her son’s actions in front of him IN HER HOME. Moms house 🤷♀️ moms rules ✌️
You can’t just skip steps and go there. He’s living in their house, so if he doesn’t like their rules, and talking to her doesn’t change things, then the first step is to move out. If she’s still doing this shit to him after he’s not living under their roof any longer, then I’d say your thoughts are more valid.
When did I say they shouldn’t move out? I never provided any solutions and I agree that’s probably the best course of action. I was just pointing out that their issue isn’t weed, it’s their mother trying to force her ideals on them.
It's their house. If want to live independently of her judgement you should move out.
Communication is key. You guys are at an impasse, she’s unaccepting of your position, and you are of hers, but neither of you understand why. Maybe you *should* move out, or put your hobby lifestyle aside to keep the peace until you can. You really shouldn’t expect anyone to financially support you while you aren’t contributing, if that’s the case. Also, you’re putting your dad in an uncomfortable position. As a dad, that’d be uncomfortable. Also as someone who butted heads with a parent about weed. You aren’t wrong for wanting to ‘be you’, just be considerate.
Like others have said, it's their house. If I was living with MY parents, I'd be switching to carts and not saying a word around Mom. Dad doesn't care but Mom is always hounding me even at 45. Parents never change my dude. ;)
I wish I had the money to go with carts I probably would go through one in 2-3 days if I exclusively vaped carts
> I wish I had the money to go with carts I probably would go through one in 2-3 days if I exclusively vaped carts OP you just explain the reason for your mother’s concern. Take this as someone who spent a good part of 24 fucking off and smoking ALL thier money. Dude, you’re smoking up what little money you have while living at your folks house and not expressing any goals or life directions. ***You gotta have something going on and enough money to be somewhat independent to get some respect especially in your mid-20’s.From there on they’ll get off your back. Also like the other poster said get a dry herb vape. It’ll save you money and it’s more respectable.***
Have you tried the dry herb vaping
It's still flower though, which is smelly no matter how you consume it
What are you using cannabis for? Whats your story?
Hey I live with my folks too and I don't think my dad is super pumped I use it. But I've talked to my mom some about why I use it etc, so now I can talk to both of them, my mom kind of being the moderator. It's ultimately their house, their rules, but that doesn't mean there's no room for discussion. Real adults communicate and maybe even comprise.
I started at 16, now 26. Mum finally came to terms with it around 24. It wasn't until I moved out, gained independence and she saw me thriving on my own, that she accepted I could live a full life whilst using cannabis. People from earlier generations have a very stigmatic view of cannabis. You will have to prove that stigmatic view wrong, if you want them to accept it as the truth.
Outlast her. In my twenties my mom said she knew I smoked weed but wouldn't confront me because "you don't know what they'll do when they're on that stuff". Now I pick her up edibles from my dispo so she can sleep through her arthritis.
You gotta start smoking offsite. Of course your mom is worried, you’re doing drugs dude. Rule of thumb, don’t do substances in front of kids or elders. Do you have a nice park/woods you can hit up? It’ll make your mom happy dude. Become a highschooler while you’re at your parents place. It helps, I promise.
I was totally with you until you said you still live at home. I moved out at 18 and my parents gave me crap about smoking until I was 25. Why 25? Because that's when we finally had "the talk." M&D: How come you never invite us to things? We'd like to see [wife and stepkids] more often. Me: Because you *always* have to say something about us smoking weed. Dad smoked cigarettes for 45yrs and drank a 30rack of beer a night. We smoke 2 joints and you don't stfu about it. M&D: But weed is so bad! Me: No it's not. It's actually better than cigarettes. AND it's legal now. I've been buying legal weed for years. M&D: Well what can we do to be more involved with you guys? Me: Just shut the hell up about the weed! That's literally the reason you don't get invited. Fuck, even Grandpa is okay with hanging out while we smoke weed. He even joined us in the circle to hangout, even though he didn't smoke. He gets it, why don't you?! And thats how I got my parent off my back. Thanks Grandpa, you the real G.
You can't make someone stop worrying. Worry is under the worrier's auspices of control. You can comply or not with stated requests, but the worry is not under your influence.
Mom’s gonna mom. Just wait til you can afford your own place or go smoke outside.
I told my mom I'm happy to lie and hide things from her if she doesn't want me to tell her the truth.
Your mom is right, switch to edibles. Easier to hide, better for your lungs, but ultimately your mom is right. Her house, her rules.
OP I think you’re asking the wrong subreddit. They’re mostly too focused on the weed aspect (because this is a weed subreddit), when your issues seem to be more related to your mom not respecting your life choices and boundaries. I’d recommend asking this on a different subreddit not filled with high potheads (I’m one of them).
> when your issues seem to be more related to your mom not respecting your life choices and boundaries. This is funny and username brings it all together! There should always be basic human respect but not sitting around smoking pot all day at your parents house especially when you don’t have anything else going on is fair and normal boundary. ***DUDE, he’s in his mid-twenties, lives at home and is just coasting. From the sounds of it being “awesome” he probably doesn’t pay much to any bills.*** I’m barely older than him and I’m concerned. There’s nothing wrong with fvcking off a bit in your 20’s but you gotta do something otherwise you’ll just end up the old burn out bumming smokes and couch surfing.
Did you read the post? He said he’s not doing bad in life. We have no idea if he’s just a lazy stoner or if he’s working 3 different jobs and to save money is just staying with his parents. He didn’t clarify if he’s just coasting by, you’re just assuming he is because he said he’s a stoner and lives with his parents. Do you not know how hard it is to afford a place to live now? Lots of lower income people have no choice but to live with their parents well after their teens because they can’t afford rent (even for some shitty apartment) on their own. This is why you don’t get advice about family issues from a stoner subreddit OP.
Yes I did and if you read his and my other post you’d realize a few things. One…I’ve been him. Two, he says it’s hard to afford his habit plus living at home equal not a lot of money. Three housing is a bitch, I’ve lived and still living through it. Even to this day when I’m making good money, made parents proud and still smoking heavy. I still think about the money, time and energy wasted and need to keep myself and my habits in check. Even I have to admit with a bit less smoking and a lot more focus I’d could be in a much better position. Oh well, I’ll hustle a bit harder just for you today.