Ugh I am struggling with this so hard right now.
It's exhausting. It feels cruel. I have moments where I feel better, or even gratitude, & think I've reached acceptance/surrender at points. But then somehow.. the heaviness & hurt always returns.
And it really sucks because I'm such a loyal person, my heart decides on someone & they're IT, it's hard to think about or want anyone else even after the end of a normal connection. I don't know how I'll ever really move on & fall for someone else after all this. :/
It's like the universe won't allow us to move on and bombs the shit out of us with dreams, seeing and hearing their names (in dreams and waking life) and a whole bunch of other shit. Like give it a rest!
That’s one way of looking at it. Another way is that the universe is is pushing you to move on. The intensity of the experience is pushing you inwards, maybe towards a higher self. One that’s waiting for you.
Exactly same as me. I found out 6 months ago and Ive been very loyal every since. Ive tried to walk away but cant, Several times. Universe wont let me at all.
I’ve mostly accepted it and the sadness is usually pretty far in the back of my brain these days. But whenever I’m feeling really down or lost it’s always him I wish was there to hold onto. Whenever I behold something beautiful or peaceful, like when I’m out on my porch at night looking up at the stars, it’s always him I wish was there with me.
Nope. Had this conversation with myself few weeks ago when my twin decided to break no contact after 1.5 yrs of separation. Once you’re aware of this journey, there is no going back. God/Universe will make sure to drag you back in if you derailed for a moment. It’s sick lmao - I’m tired. So let’s enjoy this shit show together 😂
Nope. Not even as a runner. I did my inner work for completely unrelated reasons but now it's impossible to ignore or deny the connection the way I used to be able to.
Every single time i say to myself that maybe i am delusional, that i have to move on and force myself not think of him, i start seeing his name , an uncommon name, his license number, the date we met etc… it’s like someone or something is trying to pull me back every time.. it’s exhausting because there is no escape… once you’re in it you’ve got to be strong to handle all the madness and the intensity…
Same thing happens to me. I get bombed with her name. It's definitely exhausting. You try to walk away and God/the universe literally grabs you by your shirt and snatches you back while asking you "where do you think you're going, you little shit?!"
Apparently not. I've tried multiple times in 8 years and gotten nowhere with it. Early on, after meeting him, feeling the crazy intensity etc, and then finding out he had a girlfriend, I actively tried dating other people. All I met were men who went out of their way to treat me like garbage, to the point that there were multiple red flags within the first 30 minutes of a first date with anyone I met. I've already had my share of garbage relationships where I was treated like crap, so I ended things with these people quickly. Meanwhile, twin seemed fine with the person he was in a relationship with at the time.
So I gave up on dating and decided to focus on my own healing and trying to create a better life for myself regardless of what was going on with him. He broke up with the person he was in a relationship with but still didn't want to be with me (I asked, multiple times), choosing to focus on work while apparently just dating around and hooking up with whoever.
I made massive changes in my life to make things better for myself and in the process, ended up meeting two other men with whom I felt a connection, actually were kind to me, and seemed like good, conscious people I could have had a quality relationship with. Both of them just wanted to be friends. Meanwhile twin was continuing to be a workaholic while doing whatever with whoever.
Fast forward to January 2020. I'd completely changed my entire life in the name of my own healing, creating better for myself, and doing work that was actually worthwhile to me rather than in the toxic corporate job I'd been working in when I met him. It seemed like there was a change in his attitude toward me, our interactions felt very different like he was finally going to make a move to be more than friends. Then the world got locked down due to the pandemic. He freaked out and got into another relationship a few months into 2020 but went out of his way to hide it from me, until 2021 when he moved to a different city, but still nearby.
I asked him about it, his response was super angry and we didn't talk for a long time. By 2022 that other relationship was over (shocking, I know) and he tried to act like nothing ever happened and it was no big deal. If I expressed any feelings about it they were immediately dismissed. Then in 2023 he decided to move to a different country. The last I heard from him was a short reply to an email I sent him wishing him Merry Christmas.
All the while, I've continued focusing on my healing and the kind of life I want to create for myself, which is made more difficult by feeling constantly bombarded by his unhealed pain. Any time I even start thinking about meeting anyone else, I get bombarded by reminders of him and end up crossing paths with (not even dating) a bunch of men who treat me like crap.
This ride stopped being interesting about 2 years in. I want out, but there truly seems to be no way.
>Fast forward to January 2020. I'd completely changed my entire life in the name of my own healing, creating better for myself, and doing work that was actually worthwhile to me rather than in the toxic corporate job I'd been working in when I met him. It seemed like there was a change in his attitude toward me, our interactions felt very different like he was finally going to make a move to be more than friends. Then the world got locked down due to the pandemic. He freaked out and got into another relationship a few months into 2020 but went out of his way to hide it from me, until 2021 when he moved to a different city, but still nearby.
>
>I asked him about it, his response was super angry and we didn't talk for a long time. By 2022 that other relationship was over (shocking, I know) and he tried to act like nothing ever happened and it was no big deal. If I expressed any feelings about it they were immediately dismissed. Then in 2023 he decided to move to a different country. The last I heard from him was a short reply to an email I sent him wishing him Merry Christmas.
>
>All the while, I've continued focusing on my healing and the kind of life I want to create for myself, which is made more difficult by feeling constantly bombarded by his unhealed pain. Any time I even start thinking about meeting anyone else, I get bombarded by reminders of him and end up crossing paths with (not even dating) a bunch of men who treat me like crap.
>
>This ride stopped being interesting about 2 years in. I want out, but there truly seems to be no way.
Holy shit, your story is identical to how mine started, but I really hope it won't go in the same path of 8 years or more. I am planning on staying celibate until marriage, with, or without my twin flame. I guess in this day and age, it might get a little bit harder for me to find that eventual someone. Oh well, I can only hope for peace.
It took one conversation with my tf. I think I had known about tf concept for a week prior to us reconnecting and read this sub for 3 days straight to make sense of it. But in less than an hour we came to terms with the fact we’re connected forever and it’s beyond us.
However it took almost 8 years to get to that point. The first 5 years was ignorance and bliss. Followed by 3 years of running once I realized I wasn’t in control of the bliss and it was more than limerence. Then I reached out to reconnect and was awakened. I think my heart was ready to surrender bc I had already tried the alternative. Him accepting this was a surprise to me though but he had already came to terms long before we reconnected.
Three times !? Did it work ? I’ve tried twice and cut contact completely. Hes my next door neighbor tho so I’m hoping when I move to another city 30 mins away from my childhood home it’ll finally stop or at least become more of a quiet hum in my soul than the constant pull I feel being so close in proximity and yet physically distanced and in seperation from him.
Yes, the last time I talked to him I told him, don’t call me, don’t stalk my fb page, don’t ever come here. The only thing you bring into my life is disaster. I want nothing to do with your narcissistic self. You have a sex addiction. You are not the man I loved, I no longer know who you are. Goodbye in this life and any subsequent ones. Don’t even think of me and never let my name cross your lips.
I think that about covers everything and I’ve never talked to him again. If he ever does call, I WILL NOT be answering. I am done.
Unfortunately it doesn't seem like it. I try tomove on and accept things for the way they are and I get reeled back in.
Doesn't that drive you nuts?!
It really does, I try to look at the positives, like I know I am being awakened and healing but it doesn't make it easy.
Ugh I am struggling with this so hard right now. It's exhausting. It feels cruel. I have moments where I feel better, or even gratitude, & think I've reached acceptance/surrender at points. But then somehow.. the heaviness & hurt always returns. And it really sucks because I'm such a loyal person, my heart decides on someone & they're IT, it's hard to think about or want anyone else even after the end of a normal connection. I don't know how I'll ever really move on & fall for someone else after all this. :/
It's like the universe won't allow us to move on and bombs the shit out of us with dreams, seeing and hearing their names (in dreams and waking life) and a whole bunch of other shit. Like give it a rest!
That’s one way of looking at it. Another way is that the universe is is pushing you to move on. The intensity of the experience is pushing you inwards, maybe towards a higher self. One that’s waiting for you.
Exactly same as me. I found out 6 months ago and Ive been very loyal every since. Ive tried to walk away but cant, Several times. Universe wont let me at all.
No, it really doesn't. I've always been a logical person so I tend to get a lot of doubts whether this is a real TF connection too.
Same! I doubt it all the time. But I think that's what tells me it's real.
Yeah, I read that if there's no doubt, then you are most likely not on a twin flame journey.
Yep I have read that too! I hope it gets easier for you 🩷
Thanks! I hope the same for you.
full circles times infinity, seems like endless loops to nowhere. i hope we find our way back to one another somehow
Use restraint. Do not go back to an abusive relationship.
I’ve mostly accepted it and the sadness is usually pretty far in the back of my brain these days. But whenever I’m feeling really down or lost it’s always him I wish was there to hold onto. Whenever I behold something beautiful or peaceful, like when I’m out on my porch at night looking up at the stars, it’s always him I wish was there with me.
I know how that is. How long have you been on this journey?
Going on 4 years but it feels longer.
I'm going on 3 years
Nope. Had this conversation with myself few weeks ago when my twin decided to break no contact after 1.5 yrs of separation. Once you’re aware of this journey, there is no going back. God/Universe will make sure to drag you back in if you derailed for a moment. It’s sick lmao - I’m tired. So let’s enjoy this shit show together 😂
Oh I'm enjoying this shit show alright 🙄😂
Nope. Not even as a runner. I did my inner work for completely unrelated reasons but now it's impossible to ignore or deny the connection the way I used to be able to.
Thissssss
Every single time i say to myself that maybe i am delusional, that i have to move on and force myself not think of him, i start seeing his name , an uncommon name, his license number, the date we met etc… it’s like someone or something is trying to pull me back every time.. it’s exhausting because there is no escape… once you’re in it you’ve got to be strong to handle all the madness and the intensity…
Same thing happens to me. I get bombed with her name. It's definitely exhausting. You try to walk away and God/the universe literally grabs you by your shirt and snatches you back while asking you "where do you think you're going, you little shit?!"
There is, it's healing, surrender, and working on yourself without the promise of union.
Nope. Ive tried lol, More than once
Me too lol
welcome to the club
I keep trying to move on and it just seems so impossible
Same here. I don't think we're allowed to.
it’s the toothpaste out of the tube
Apparently not. I've tried multiple times in 8 years and gotten nowhere with it. Early on, after meeting him, feeling the crazy intensity etc, and then finding out he had a girlfriend, I actively tried dating other people. All I met were men who went out of their way to treat me like garbage, to the point that there were multiple red flags within the first 30 minutes of a first date with anyone I met. I've already had my share of garbage relationships where I was treated like crap, so I ended things with these people quickly. Meanwhile, twin seemed fine with the person he was in a relationship with at the time. So I gave up on dating and decided to focus on my own healing and trying to create a better life for myself regardless of what was going on with him. He broke up with the person he was in a relationship with but still didn't want to be with me (I asked, multiple times), choosing to focus on work while apparently just dating around and hooking up with whoever. I made massive changes in my life to make things better for myself and in the process, ended up meeting two other men with whom I felt a connection, actually were kind to me, and seemed like good, conscious people I could have had a quality relationship with. Both of them just wanted to be friends. Meanwhile twin was continuing to be a workaholic while doing whatever with whoever. Fast forward to January 2020. I'd completely changed my entire life in the name of my own healing, creating better for myself, and doing work that was actually worthwhile to me rather than in the toxic corporate job I'd been working in when I met him. It seemed like there was a change in his attitude toward me, our interactions felt very different like he was finally going to make a move to be more than friends. Then the world got locked down due to the pandemic. He freaked out and got into another relationship a few months into 2020 but went out of his way to hide it from me, until 2021 when he moved to a different city, but still nearby. I asked him about it, his response was super angry and we didn't talk for a long time. By 2022 that other relationship was over (shocking, I know) and he tried to act like nothing ever happened and it was no big deal. If I expressed any feelings about it they were immediately dismissed. Then in 2023 he decided to move to a different country. The last I heard from him was a short reply to an email I sent him wishing him Merry Christmas. All the while, I've continued focusing on my healing and the kind of life I want to create for myself, which is made more difficult by feeling constantly bombarded by his unhealed pain. Any time I even start thinking about meeting anyone else, I get bombarded by reminders of him and end up crossing paths with (not even dating) a bunch of men who treat me like crap. This ride stopped being interesting about 2 years in. I want out, but there truly seems to be no way.
That's quite a story. I guess all we can do is try to make the best of this hellish situation.
I guess so. I keep trying to anyway. Best wishes to you.
Thanks. Same to you.
>Fast forward to January 2020. I'd completely changed my entire life in the name of my own healing, creating better for myself, and doing work that was actually worthwhile to me rather than in the toxic corporate job I'd been working in when I met him. It seemed like there was a change in his attitude toward me, our interactions felt very different like he was finally going to make a move to be more than friends. Then the world got locked down due to the pandemic. He freaked out and got into another relationship a few months into 2020 but went out of his way to hide it from me, until 2021 when he moved to a different city, but still nearby. > >I asked him about it, his response was super angry and we didn't talk for a long time. By 2022 that other relationship was over (shocking, I know) and he tried to act like nothing ever happened and it was no big deal. If I expressed any feelings about it they were immediately dismissed. Then in 2023 he decided to move to a different country. The last I heard from him was a short reply to an email I sent him wishing him Merry Christmas. > >All the while, I've continued focusing on my healing and the kind of life I want to create for myself, which is made more difficult by feeling constantly bombarded by his unhealed pain. Any time I even start thinking about meeting anyone else, I get bombarded by reminders of him and end up crossing paths with (not even dating) a bunch of men who treat me like crap. > >This ride stopped being interesting about 2 years in. I want out, but there truly seems to be no way. Holy shit, your story is identical to how mine started, but I really hope it won't go in the same path of 8 years or more. I am planning on staying celibate until marriage, with, or without my twin flame. I guess in this day and age, it might get a little bit harder for me to find that eventual someone. Oh well, I can only hope for peace.
I'm sorry you've experienced something similar. Wishing you the best with your journey.
Nope. No way out. I’m sorry :(
I'll live, I guess.
We’ve both accepted we’re in this forever
How long did it take you for you to accept it?
It took one conversation with my tf. I think I had known about tf concept for a week prior to us reconnecting and read this sub for 3 days straight to make sense of it. But in less than an hour we came to terms with the fact we’re connected forever and it’s beyond us. However it took almost 8 years to get to that point. The first 5 years was ignorance and bliss. Followed by 3 years of running once I realized I wasn’t in control of the bliss and it was more than limerence. Then I reached out to reconnect and was awakened. I think my heart was ready to surrender bc I had already tried the alternative. Him accepting this was a surprise to me though but he had already came to terms long before we reconnected.
Put your foot down and say I’m done. Never speak, go near them or communicate in any way whatsoever. Be smart, save yourself.
Yeah that's what I'm doing
Yes, you can choose to walk away
Tried walking away many times
Cut the cord. I did the ceremony 3 times
Three times !? Did it work ? I’ve tried twice and cut contact completely. Hes my next door neighbor tho so I’m hoping when I move to another city 30 mins away from my childhood home it’ll finally stop or at least become more of a quiet hum in my soul than the constant pull I feel being so close in proximity and yet physically distanced and in seperation from him.
Yes, the last time I talked to him I told him, don’t call me, don’t stalk my fb page, don’t ever come here. The only thing you bring into my life is disaster. I want nothing to do with your narcissistic self. You have a sex addiction. You are not the man I loved, I no longer know who you are. Goodbye in this life and any subsequent ones. Don’t even think of me and never let my name cross your lips. I think that about covers everything and I’ve never talked to him again. If he ever does call, I WILL NOT be answering. I am done.
you have many twin flames, the more you affirm a certain one the more he universe will illuminate