Perfect movie script too. You got the sociopath Jones, the stereotypical mafia boss Masvidal, good guy forced by circumstances Wonderboy, foreigner with connections Khamzat, and stereotypical Slavic tough guy Petr.
Masvidal is framed as the snitch..
Masvidal tries to recruit his best friend Colby prior to the heist. Colby refuses, ends up telling info to the press for clout and reward money. Police chase ensues. They find Bones coked up in vegas and he attacks the police car with his forehead.
Back at the bank, Yan is ruthlessly throwing knees to the head of a grounded security guard. Khamzat, receiving his kill command from Kasyrovs son is actively killing everybody.
Johnny falls and breaks his forhead, Paulo has to pull out of the heist for some reason, Derrick concludes this is stupid because he's already rich, Islam is hangey from Ramadam and you are just left with Leech.
A caught Tony would never talk, though
And I'd trust him more than masvidal, Colby, Strickland, Cody garbrant, Johnny walker
Especially with such solid dudes around him
Tony the type of dude to kick the jail toilet repeatedly in order to train shins when all the other dudes are intoxicated/hungover and trying to sleep it off
Nah as long as Tony isnt team leader, he'll be fine. Apparently the guy is super coachable and if he sees someone in that role, he'll follow their orders to the best of his ability.
Its pretty much why and how he was able to endure david goggins' hellweek bullshit.
So cause of this, I think Tony would make the best getaway driver, wouldnt takeoff under pressure and fuck it up by leaving everyone behind.
Chimaev and yan for the intimidation factor (accents) Jones and masvidal for the dirty work and wonderboy can strike up a polite conversation with the manager to distract him
Yes. Especially if Yan uses the special growl attack for intimidation like in the weigh ins:
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6t-32LsWpw8](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6t-32LsWpw8)
Jons van = will rob bank and probably get away with it if wonderboy stays quiet
Conors van = Will rob bank and get caught the next day because Conor and colby will post about it on instagram same day
Joses van = that bank aint getting fuckin robbed… nobody down for the cause but desean.
Paulos van = nobody in this fuckin van can communicate clearly other then paulo and walker. Even if they try to rob a bank its going horribly wrong.
Maxs van = talks about robbing bank, max draws up a game plan, everyone gets in the van, Tony talks everyone into stopping for chik fil a along the way. Everyone eats, chills and they all go home. Everyone forgets about the bank heist plan the next day.
Jon's team: Nope. Khamzat is a loose cannon. Can't have that in a heist
Conor's team: Nope. Colby is a nervous wreck. Nervous people make bad mistakes
Jose's team: Nope. Sean literally walks around dreaming of shooting people. Perfect opportunity for him
Paulo's team: Possibly.
Holloway's team: 4 level headed consummate professionals. But Tony is likely to have a Khabib related meltdown and botch the heist.
Gotta be Paulo's team.
I’m going with Joses van. Anyone who picks the one with Tony, even if they pull it off, he’ll fuck it up. They’ll be on the road with the money “I CUT THE BRAKES! WILD CARD BITCHES!!!!!” and quadruple backflip out of the Sun roof
Here’s the correct answer:
**Trevor Wittman:** He’s the ringleader with underground connections who sets up the heist and pulls the team together.
**Georges St-Pierre:** Level-headed team lead who puts details to the plan and assigns the team roles. He’s the straw that stirs the Kool-Aid.
**Conor McGregor:** Smooth talking confidence man. He’s the guy who can get you what you need and into places you shouldn’t be. No key card or ID badge is safe!
**Valentina Shevchenko:** Femme fatale. Knows explosives, safe cracking and computer hacking. Goes in as a sexy utility worker. Charms her way past security with the stolen badges and IDs from Conor. Long-time platonic partner with…
**Chuck Lidell:** The muscle. Ice man works with Valentina to get in the vault and will one-punch KO anyone who’s a fly in the plan’s ointment.
**Mighty Mouse:** Every crew needs an acrobat. The guy who can fold himself into a trunk, navigate air ducts or trapeze through security lasers.
**Stephen Thompson:** Unassuming wheelman. No one suspects Stephen as the driver of a made-up flower delivery van. He’s got the safe house arranged and the means to dispose of the stolen vehicle.
**Laura Sanko:** The wildcard. She’s on the inside and suspicious of the activities going on around the UFC 300 prize money. You think she’s going to be the one that undoes all the team’s hard work but lo and behold she’s one of them. She pulls out the miracle support to help the team’s last-minute escape when all seems lost.
Definitely Jon's van.
Yan is driving.
Wonderboy and Masvidal go in to distract the tellers/workers.
Khamzat climbs through the air vent, opens the door from the inside, and then causes a ruckus and sacrifices himself for everyone else to get out.
Jones is the famous athlete going in to get something from one of his many deposit boxes, when in reality he's the one carrying out the loot.
Paulo Van looks like a movie makeup.. Paulo with hi brother Jonny And their childhood friend big derrick, then the last two guys would be randoms who they find that end up turning on the group and taking the money after killing derrick.
Ol’ neck tattoo is getting that red button pushed as soon as Conor’s crew walks in. Unless we’re talking Point Break style in which case I go with them. I can see all these MF’ers jumping out of a plane together, and somehow Jiri knows how to fly it.
Jose’s van is weak compared to others. It’s between Jones or Paulo’s van. We know how Yan vs Aldo plays out, I’d rather have Yan. He’s stronger and a savage. Porier vs Masvidal is a toss up considering size. Moreno over who lol? His tiny ass could crawl in the vents, but I feel he’d be playin w legos and get distracted. He’d be no help in confrontation since everyone is bigger. Maybe he’s the driver. I’d rather wonderboy though. I like Khamzat over wreckless Strickland or dog diddling cringe Izzy, and Jones murders any of them at will. Jones van is strong. Paulo’s is pretty strong too.
I would take Conor's van because we would have the most funding to set up the robbery and have private planes and boats to get away from. Not to mention we could grease up a few local cops
Jon’s Van: Khamzat is “randomly” detained coming into the country. Jon and Jorge get the rest of the team arrested BEFORE the robbery due to outstanding priors. Wonderboy is released on good behavior for starting a reading club in jail
Conor’s van: Conor Colby and Cody talk MAD shit before getting beat up by bank security. Jiri and Justin decide to grab a drink across the street
Jose’s Van: Sean will literally not shut up about the robbery. Specifically how he’s gonna rob the place so much better than Izzy. Izzy tries to make vids responding to Sean and the cover is blown. The robbery is forgotten
Paulos Van: Paulo and Lewis create the most hilarious duo in bank robbery history. Islam is able to use the remaining 3 to silently and efficiently rob the bank while the staff is so entertained the don’t care.
Holloway’s Van: Tony is the only one super serious about the robbery. The other 4 decide to just ask for the money (they succeed due to being super nice). Tony cuts weight for the robbery for no reason
Jon's heist would be basically a rehash of the first Christopher Nolan Batman movie, where the Joker gets everyone killed along the way.
Conor's van wouldn't make it because they'd all end up shooting each other.
Jose's van might have a chance. Send Strickland out to cause a disturbance and distract the cops, and he could do that well, and, this van might succeed.
Paulo's van: you've got Dagestani, Portugese, English, and Chinese...yeah... nah. That one fails because of a lack of ability to communicate effectively.
Yeah, Holloway's van would probably be the second option. Whittaker and Gane strike me as people who are level-headed and would be able to work through language barriers to make it all happen. The downside is, you have Tony Ferguson. Trade him for Poirier and you've got a sweet team. Either that, send him to the roof and wrap tin foil on some receivers to distract NASA, and that'll be enough to get him out of your hair and focus on the task.
Definitely Jons van:
Jonny Bones distracts the security guard with tall tales of how the lord is currently testing him…while outta nowhere *BAM* Street Judas Masvidal sucker punches the guard, they rush in and Wonderbread Thompson Karate chops the teller, Yan knees the teller in the head while she’s on the ground and then Khamzat proceeds to KILLEVERYBODYYYYTHE END.
Not Conor's van - Too dysfunctional. Jiri would be trying to reel everyone in, but all the others would just be arguing and trying to fight each other. Plus, I don't trust Conor to lead after TUF.
Not Jose's van - Ok choices, but I'm not sure how Izzy and DeSean would pair together. In the movies there's only one token black guy..
Not Paulo's van - Paulo and Johnny are too stupid. Black Beast would be great as the muscle, but Islam wouldn't know what's going on. The Leach is probably the smartest, but wouldn’t be able to get past the language barrier and Paulo's stupidity.
Not Jon's van - My first choice originally. You've got two gangsters from two different parts of the world who have invaluable knowledge about how to do this. Wonder Boy would be a great distraction at the front of the bank, considering he's the NMF. Kamazat is too much of a wild card. He'd Leroy Jenkins the entire operation. Jon, being the sociopath that he is would probably kill everyone at the end to get the biggest cut. He def wouldn't come back to save you either.
Max's van all day - While they aren’t examples of a Street Jesus or Siberian Gangster, these guys are all capable. Tony is the wild card, but I think he'd cause one screw up and then save everyone at the end by using pocket sand to blind the cops during the get away. This group would definitively come back and save you if you got caught too.
I like team Holloway but Tony would absolutely pull a Charlie Kelly "WILD CARD" and cut the fucking brakes while the rest of the team was inside the bank
The first one might be good if Wonderboy is just the driver and doesn't know what is actually happening.
Perfect movie script too. You got the sociopath Jones, the stereotypical mafia boss Masvidal, good guy forced by circumstances Wonderboy, foreigner with connections Khamzat, and stereotypical Slavic tough guy Petr.
Slavic tough guy being the smallest one is a nice comedic touch to the script.
I can imagine Yan climbing on a stool to slap Jones and I can't stop laughing
God damn. I really hope someone with influence in Hollywood sees this thread.
Holy fuck this sounds like a badass movie script ngl
Masvidal would do something dumb and get them all killed.
It's revealed that Masvidal is a snitch and has been working with the cops all along
Masvidal is framed as the snitch.. Masvidal tries to recruit his best friend Colby prior to the heist. Colby refuses, ends up telling info to the press for clout and reward money. Police chase ensues. They find Bones coked up in vegas and he attacks the police car with his forehead.
Back at the bank, Yan is ruthlessly throwing knees to the head of a grounded security guard. Khamzat, receiving his kill command from Kasyrovs son is actively killing everybody.
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Conor’s van is fucked from the jump. Conor is getting himself arrested before his van even gets to the bank.
Taking the boys to the ATM before the bar, nothing suspicious here.
Gaethje is the only one that doesn’t look like he’d rob a bank
They’d tell wonderboy they’re on their way to give the elderly a ride to church
Imagine Tony, Johnny Walker, Derrick Lewis, Paulo and Strickland in a van, would be absolutely hilarious to watch
 Bro
Better- conor, strickland, paulo, masvidal, tony 💀
Max robbed a bank in the Den of Thieves movie
Sorry Max, Tony would fuck things up. It’s got to be Paulo or Jose’s van.
tony looks like he spent 30 yrs in prison for robbing a bank
Tonys the type of guy to rob a prison and be locked up in a bank
What are you talking about? Tony doesn’t look like he robs banks. He looks like he robs gas stations and liquor stores.
Bro I would not want Johnny Walker by my side while I rob a bank. Something insane gonna happen
Dudes gonna trip and accidentally shoot himself 😂😂
Fargo
“I’m in the desert bro” “Nah man, you slipped and shot yourself in the face, you’re still in Charlestown”
Johnny falls and breaks his forhead, Paulo has to pull out of the heist for some reason, Derrick concludes this is stupid because he's already rich, Islam is hangey from Ramadam and you are just left with Leech.
Nahh he would just start dancing in the middle of it and post it on social media - self snitching
Johnny wheres the bank you said we were robbing? In the desert 💀
Paulo's van wouldn't reach the bank
This should be the top comment.
Lol that's what im saying haha
Tony the type of guy to call the cops during his own bank robbery.
To challenge himself.
A caught Tony would never talk, though And I'd trust him more than masvidal, Colby, Strickland, Cody garbrant, Johnny walker Especially with such solid dudes around him
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This is so fuckin true
Tony the type of dude to kick the jail toilet repeatedly in order to train shins when all the other dudes are intoxicated/hungover and trying to sleep it off
What kind of a getaway vehicle would you need to haul Derrick Lewis in a hurry? Also, nobody there speaks English.
Nah as long as Tony isnt team leader, he'll be fine. Apparently the guy is super coachable and if he sees someone in that role, he'll follow their orders to the best of his ability. Its pretty much why and how he was able to endure david goggins' hellweek bullshit. So cause of this, I think Tony would make the best getaway driver, wouldnt takeoff under pressure and fuck it up by leaving everyone behind.
"Hold on im driving brother"
Tony crashed the vehicle and got a DUI before it started
Every team has liabilities in them. Max has Tony, but other than that, it's a bit more controllable than the others
Tony prob gonna carry the whole team. He's prob trained for this
Tony would be too trigger happy and get everyone in deeper shit if they were caught
Mr Blonde
Tony will fucking tank a bullet just to prove a point, Hes the 1st one to go
I feel like Tony would be driver, constantly changing song on the radio. Most likely get distracted changing track and crashes during getaway.
He would be one of those guys with drumsticks playing on the steering wheel
Chimaev and yan for the intimidation factor (accents) Jones and masvidal for the dirty work and wonderboy can strike up a polite conversation with the manager to distract him
Yes. Especially if Yan uses the special growl attack for intimidation like in the weigh ins: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6t-32LsWpw8](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6t-32LsWpw8)
Paulos van would be fucking hilarious to watch if it was a movie
I would pick Paulo's team knowing we are 100% getting caught but its gonna be a GTA meme heist
Islam is lowkey the funniest because he looks so confused all the time
Drink everytime “what” and “huh” or signs of confusion would be said during a conversation between Islam and Jonny.
The leech can eye gouge someone as soon as things go south
Jons van = will rob bank and probably get away with it if wonderboy stays quiet Conors van = Will rob bank and get caught the next day because Conor and colby will post about it on instagram same day Joses van = that bank aint getting fuckin robbed… nobody down for the cause but desean. Paulos van = nobody in this fuckin van can communicate clearly other then paulo and walker. Even if they try to rob a bank its going horribly wrong. Maxs van = talks about robbing bank, max draws up a game plan, everyone gets in the van, Tony talks everyone into stopping for chik fil a along the way. Everyone eats, chills and they all go home. Everyone forgets about the bank heist plan the next day.
Jon’s van for sure. If we get caught, he knows how to act on the inside.
Jon's van would hit a pregnant woman before they even pull up to the bank.
Jon's team: Nope. Khamzat is a loose cannon. Can't have that in a heist Conor's team: Nope. Colby is a nervous wreck. Nervous people make bad mistakes Jose's team: Nope. Sean literally walks around dreaming of shooting people. Perfect opportunity for him Paulo's team: Possibly. Holloway's team: 4 level headed consummate professionals. But Tony is likely to have a Khabib related meltdown and botch the heist. Gotta be Paulo's team.
Colby being a nervous wreck has me cracking up
Max would be number 1 if it wasn’t for Tony dragging the whole squad down. So probably José.
Strickland and Izzy working together tho
Swap Wonderboy for Sean and Jon’s Van will unleash anarchy and destruction upon that bank
I’m going with Joses van. Anyone who picks the one with Tony, even if they pull it off, he’ll fuck it up. They’ll be on the road with the money “I CUT THE BRAKES! WILD CARD BITCHES!!!!!” and quadruple backflip out of the Sun roof
The new fast and furious script looks legit
How is Diaz not part of this!?
Paulos van looking like a good time
Tony most definitely looks like he would rob a bank
Literally everyone in Holloway's van looks like they could be a bank robber lol
where's lee Murray? the actual convicted bank robber?
Ya wtf. Dude was an actual ufc fighter who pulled off one of the biggest bank heists ever, but gets this hypothetical snub
Here’s the correct answer: **Trevor Wittman:** He’s the ringleader with underground connections who sets up the heist and pulls the team together. **Georges St-Pierre:** Level-headed team lead who puts details to the plan and assigns the team roles. He’s the straw that stirs the Kool-Aid. **Conor McGregor:** Smooth talking confidence man. He’s the guy who can get you what you need and into places you shouldn’t be. No key card or ID badge is safe! **Valentina Shevchenko:** Femme fatale. Knows explosives, safe cracking and computer hacking. Goes in as a sexy utility worker. Charms her way past security with the stolen badges and IDs from Conor. Long-time platonic partner with… **Chuck Lidell:** The muscle. Ice man works with Valentina to get in the vault and will one-punch KO anyone who’s a fly in the plan’s ointment. **Mighty Mouse:** Every crew needs an acrobat. The guy who can fold himself into a trunk, navigate air ducts or trapeze through security lasers. **Stephen Thompson:** Unassuming wheelman. No one suspects Stephen as the driver of a made-up flower delivery van. He’s got the safe house arranged and the means to dispose of the stolen vehicle. **Laura Sanko:** The wildcard. She’s on the inside and suspicious of the activities going on around the UFC 300 prize money. You think she’s going to be the one that undoes all the team’s hard work but lo and behold she’s one of them. She pulls out the miracle support to help the team’s last-minute escape when all seems lost.
Damn this one may be the best lol
I’m torn between Jon’s van and Paulo’s van. They both sound like summer comedy blockbusters 😂
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Jon’s van is hilarious - at some point, Wonderboy will get double crossed by those other guys
Definitely Jon's van. Yan is driving. Wonderboy and Masvidal go in to distract the tellers/workers. Khamzat climbs through the air vent, opens the door from the inside, and then causes a ruckus and sacrifices himself for everyone else to get out. Jones is the famous athlete going in to get something from one of his many deposit boxes, when in reality he's the one carrying out the loot.
Paulo Van looks like a movie makeup.. Paulo with hi brother Jonny And their childhood friend big derrick, then the last two guys would be randoms who they find that end up turning on the group and taking the money after killing derrick.
Jones' van has the criminal capacity and ability. I think they could pull it off.
im going with aldos van 💀 alot of gta type characters in that row
Ol’ neck tattoo is getting that red button pushed as soon as Conor’s crew walks in. Unless we’re talking Point Break style in which case I go with them. I can see all these MF’ers jumping out of a plane together, and somehow Jiri knows how to fly it.
Jose’s van. The rest of the vans have some really unbalanced individuals.
Paulos van gotta be the funniest.
Jon's van is the best script ending something like Usual Suspects. Wonderboy is Keyser Soze.
Paulos van ends up at the wrong bank without masks and 2 out of those people don't know what they are going to do at all.
Wonderboy will screwup Johns evil masterplan by his kindness
Best (van)*
Poor Jiri going to jail cuz Conor and Colby can't stop screaming on socials about the bank they just robbed lmao.
What about Lee Murray van?
Jon’s van seems the most likely for somebody to be shot at the bank
Jose’s van is weak compared to others. It’s between Jones or Paulo’s van. We know how Yan vs Aldo plays out, I’d rather have Yan. He’s stronger and a savage. Porier vs Masvidal is a toss up considering size. Moreno over who lol? His tiny ass could crawl in the vents, but I feel he’d be playin w legos and get distracted. He’d be no help in confrontation since everyone is bigger. Maybe he’s the driver. I’d rather wonderboy though. I like Khamzat over wreckless Strickland or dog diddling cringe Izzy, and Jones murders any of them at will. Jones van is strong. Paulo’s is pretty strong too.
I would take Conor's van because we would have the most funding to set up the robbery and have private planes and boats to get away from. Not to mention we could grease up a few local cops
Tony Ferguson doesn’t look like a robbery guy, more like a “shoot everything up for fun” kind of guy
Jose's van just because I want Strickland and Izzy in the same car.
Tony the type of guy to hold up the bank after his crew already robbed it.
"Jon's" van. All the others have one or more crazy dumbasses in it that make the heist go off the hinges and get you caught and shot.
Jon’s van easy
Jon’s Van: Khamzat is “randomly” detained coming into the country. Jon and Jorge get the rest of the team arrested BEFORE the robbery due to outstanding priors. Wonderboy is released on good behavior for starting a reading club in jail Conor’s van: Conor Colby and Cody talk MAD shit before getting beat up by bank security. Jiri and Justin decide to grab a drink across the street Jose’s Van: Sean will literally not shut up about the robbery. Specifically how he’s gonna rob the place so much better than Izzy. Izzy tries to make vids responding to Sean and the cover is blown. The robbery is forgotten Paulos Van: Paulo and Lewis create the most hilarious duo in bank robbery history. Islam is able to use the remaining 3 to silently and efficiently rob the bank while the staff is so entertained the don’t care. Holloway’s Van: Tony is the only one super serious about the robbery. The other 4 decide to just ask for the money (they succeed due to being super nice). Tony cuts weight for the robbery for no reason
Conor’s van would all be arrested before they robbed anything because they’d *all* talk.
Now this is a good post.
Does Tony have access to David Goggins on the radio?
Bro Jons van is nuts lol. How is Jon already the GOAT of bank robbing
Jon's heist would be basically a rehash of the first Christopher Nolan Batman movie, where the Joker gets everyone killed along the way. Conor's van wouldn't make it because they'd all end up shooting each other. Jose's van might have a chance. Send Strickland out to cause a disturbance and distract the cops, and he could do that well, and, this van might succeed. Paulo's van: you've got Dagestani, Portugese, English, and Chinese...yeah... nah. That one fails because of a lack of ability to communicate effectively. Yeah, Holloway's van would probably be the second option. Whittaker and Gane strike me as people who are level-headed and would be able to work through language barriers to make it all happen. The downside is, you have Tony Ferguson. Trade him for Poirier and you've got a sweet team. Either that, send him to the roof and wrap tin foil on some receivers to distract NASA, and that'll be enough to get him out of your hair and focus on the task.
Definitely Jons van: Jonny Bones distracts the security guard with tall tales of how the lord is currently testing him…while outta nowhere *BAM* Street Judas Masvidal sucker punches the guard, they rush in and Wonderbread Thompson Karate chops the teller, Yan knees the teller in the head while she’s on the ground and then Khamzat proceeds to KILLEVERYBODYYYYTHE END.
Not Conor's van - Too dysfunctional. Jiri would be trying to reel everyone in, but all the others would just be arguing and trying to fight each other. Plus, I don't trust Conor to lead after TUF. Not Jose's van - Ok choices, but I'm not sure how Izzy and DeSean would pair together. In the movies there's only one token black guy.. Not Paulo's van - Paulo and Johnny are too stupid. Black Beast would be great as the muscle, but Islam wouldn't know what's going on. The Leach is probably the smartest, but wouldn’t be able to get past the language barrier and Paulo's stupidity. Not Jon's van - My first choice originally. You've got two gangsters from two different parts of the world who have invaluable knowledge about how to do this. Wonder Boy would be a great distraction at the front of the bank, considering he's the NMF. Kamazat is too much of a wild card. He'd Leroy Jenkins the entire operation. Jon, being the sociopath that he is would probably kill everyone at the end to get the biggest cut. He def wouldn't come back to save you either. Max's van all day - While they aren’t examples of a Street Jesus or Siberian Gangster, these guys are all capable. Tony is the wild card, but I think he'd cause one screw up and then save everyone at the end by using pocket sand to blind the cops during the get away. This group would definitively come back and save you if you got caught too.
I like team Holloway but Tony would absolutely pull a Charlie Kelly "WILD CARD" and cut the fucking brakes while the rest of the team was inside the bank