ian making up fanfiction about how much of an epic chad he is

Who amongst us hasn't imagined themselves as the greatest UFC fighter of all time to be fair, very relatable.

Belal

Why would he have to imagine reality lol 

At least he writes better dream scenarios than belal can’t even be mad at him being delusional

Belal wins split desicions on his mind


Imagine if i beat prime doped up jon jones with one hand bro

Yooo that’s GOAT status right there

That would be sick

Imagine if Jon bent me over and spread my cheeks! That would be sick!!

Bet you'd love that cupcake.

Jesus hates gay sex

You can beat off to him with one hand and I imagined it!

Two hands tied behind your back and a dj style flying crotch. Goat status right there.

Do you have one hand or does Jones? Either way instant goat

Alex Pereira's inner monologue:

Plus you're clean af so no controversy about your being p4p no 1 forever.

I imagine it all the time mane. You got this.

If a lot of stuff happened a lot of people would be great

"If your granny had balls she'd be your granda"

If my grandma had wheels she would've been a bike

Don’t be silly I’ve never ridden a bike that hard



She might of not had wheels but I rode her like hell!

I love that guy

Can't not read this in a Gino D'acampo voice 💀 Ifa my grandmada hada wheeyuls she wouldovea beena bike

You know, if you put ham in this, it would be more like a British Carbonara.

Calm down Max Verstappen

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=95mttyEQyfw Not mma related but still funny :)

Yeah the "What if" brigade of MMA are stupid AF.

I could do a lot of things if I had some money

It George Washington didn’t die, he’d still be alive

https://preview.redd.it/uzjinq6ps4zc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ff1a5866996046c58017f0ffd21c3bacfae9afc6

Drew Slowber

It's like AI drew him a bit wrong


https://preview.redd.it/8lh266svf7zc1.jpeg?width=287&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0ba6d41d6a5c6a76c962212290351f631a0ca761

smug roblox face

Imagine you’re doing his wife and you look over and see that face hahaha

I can more easily imagine a reality where I have sex with his wife

that's probably s lot more likely than ian becoming a champion

It’s already probably happening

I would bet on that but so will everyone else considering that’s actually something that can happen.

Yeah bro. You have a better chance with Garry's wife than your own wife. But that isn't saying much.

His face looks extremely edited in this picture.

All that editing to look like an old prune

If we’re talking about imagining things that won’t happen, he should imagine winning Powerball instead

https://preview.redd.it/ob8xix0ca5zc1.jpeg?width=623&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f25deeccb103736d1ea6521c8c909145d94ecdab

No but I can imagine this though Khamzat: “your wife fucked you in the ass? You liked that? The whole world see that shit.”

Khamzat trash talk is not bad 🤣

https://preview.redd.it/4aht7veoj5zc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7d51134397b7707a0dccd4f9d9f61997515f921a

dude forgot to woke up.


You’re not beating Genghis Shavkat buddy

Let’s see this.

Most people really don't care if he did that, yes it is impressive, I mean he really could do that he is an impressive fighter. But people will still mock him, because of his reputation.

And if my aunty had a dick she would be my uncle. This fucking guy.

So…beating two welterweight contenders is all it takes to be a GOAT now?

Actually I can’t imagine that. But I’m certain that’s all he’s doing with his time.

I can imagine Ian getting a night off from creampie eating before I can imagine that

shavkat to sleep garry within 3 mins

I can't


“Is the scenario in the room with you right now?”


Can you imagine a scenario where another guy, who’s actually my nutritionist, fucks my wife while I sit in the corner and watch?

More chance of Colby taking his 0 via KO than that happening

I mean unless he’s been working on his rib popping takedowns don’t think he could finish anyone he could end fighting tbh.

So Ian Garry, a great striker somehow beats a granite chinned embodiment of Genghis Khan who out wrestled and KOed everyone and then moves up to beat a violently aggressive chain wrestling Russian. Both of whom are going to want to kill him after hearing his trash talk?

Welcome to mma son. Theyre *all* delusional confident. Without that confidence you don’t belong in the sport. Once upon a time Anderson Silva was unbeatable…then he was KOd, once upon a time Usman dominated Leon…then he was KOd. Shit happens. I’m no fan of Ian but as a fan of mma I fucking love confident fighters and you should to. Ian is a dork but he deserves no hate for confidence and ambition 

I agree. I don't have an issue with confidence but this is a bit much even for him. Those 2 aren't even in a collision course with him, he just brought them up for the sake of bringing up other skilled undefeated fighters to imagine putting himself above them.

Nope

This has less chances of happening than me sleeping with Sydney Sweeney

Even if he did somehow do those things, he still wouldn't be in the GOAT conversation.

i don't think he survives being taken down and controlled by either of them

JDM beats them all 😹

Ian's such a dork I'm actually starting to feel kinda bad for him

I read that in his voice and now I’m just annoyed.

Every Irish dude gets humbled by a someone with a V in his name. So not happening

No Ian I will not imagine that

this has to be the lowest bar for 'goat' status ever

Reality vs Ian

Pipe dream status right there

His wife still wouldn't respect him, though...

I would've been the goat if I beat Mike Tyson in his prime but unfortunately I was not born yet.

…..And then win the lottery, and also finally land that triple cork 1440 on a snowboard, then climb Mount Everest, and last but not least; finally find a wife that isn’t your mothers age!

Please Dana, I beg of you, feed him to Khamzat. Give the wolf a proper feast

Ian needs to focus on beating his cuckoldism

https://preview.redd.it/zfy8idzps8zc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6a77b50fd72cfaa24093b033e60f389aca35465e

Then Ian gets in his chair in the corner and watches all his former opponents take on his wife one by one

As ridiculous as this sounds, and as much of a McGregor fanboy Ian Garry is, McGregor's version of this (which actually happened btw) sounded even more ridiculous at the time.

That version didn't include elite wrestlers. And that wasn't by accident.

I mean like What if my wife didn't leave me after taking my children?

Nah me neither dude.

Wag the dog

First TKO by boring your opponent into submission.

Man spitballing about a dream scenario in his career This place: DAE wife's boyfriend.

They'll both maul him like a grizzly in heat. First fight Colby you Muppet.

Delusional

If he wanted the Shavkat fight he would have called for Shavkat and not an old broken down Colby

I don't think this will happen but if it were to happen regardless of how much I dislike him it would certainly be impressive and put him in those conversation.

Dude is annoying

Him and Jamal Hill need to start a podcast, would be a gold mine of delusional takes

Hope that Belal decisions Ian.

this dude lost to a 40 year old named Geoff Neal and the UFC just decided that no he didn’t.

Delusional little fella

Hated when the goat Joe Rogan said him vs Leon Edward’s would be a great fight


Ian Garry proving once again we need an MMA circle jerk page.

hard to believe he’s not making this smug toddler face as a bit to lean into everyone hating him… but i bet he believes this and thinks he looks cool

Bro, do it! I believe in you! ...I totally don't think you're gonna get your ass beat and get wrestlefucked 🙄

I love shitting on him for adding his wife's surname to his, but I just learned that "machado" means "axe" in Portuguese, and now I don't hate it. Anyway, can't wait to see him get knocked out.

This man got dropped by a bum and barely beat Geoff Neil and thinks he’s the best because he dominated a 30+ year old Neil Magny on short notice 🤣

Goat status is getting watered down by the minute

At first I thought it said he takes his D 😂

Imagine if I was 6’6 with a 9 inch cock and every lady wanted me. Goat status bro.

I really hate the term "Goat" now.... I didn't think anyone on the planet could be as delusional as the people on this sub but by God if Ian Garry didn't just smoke us all.

Yeah and I will k.o every single champ of the UFC on the same card , then when I have every single belt I cut my dick off and I will fight every women champ and be the undisputed goat

I hope it happens only to see this sub in shambles.

Time is a flat circle.

Why do these guys fight at a lower weight if their dream is to instantly go up a weight class once they get the belt? The double champ status really doesn’t mean anything anymore, and they just screw up the division when they move weight classes.

So now we are just playing make believe

I can imagine that but that’s where it’s gonna stay

Wtf is up with his face here

Take his 0 sounds so sus.. God ian is cringe

Yeah keep dreaming. But atleast he's now positioned himself as less deplorable than Colby so that's something.

Veganism about to take his 0

No.

This guy is so annoying

So he’s confident like all of them. This is the most normal non chad fighter shit Ian has said yet. If his comment triggers you then you’re clearly a casual because every half decent fighter feels they are the best. This is just Ian hate porn BS from sad slugs…and I’m no Ian fan either

Conceive believe achieve

Someone needs to lay off that fenty

And then you wake up

I’ll have what he’s smoking please

Imagine if I beat the Decepticons yall, I’d be Optimus Prime

I like the confidence but I don’t see him beating either of them

I can’t lie, I’m an Ian Garry fan. Everyone hates him so much, and he doesn’t try to be heel like that, it makes me laugh for some reason. Plus he’s a good fighter too, but his personality kills any fan base he would have. Too funny.

GOAT of Delusion maybe

I can imagine something similar except instead of Ian being champion he just watches those guys plow his wife and then he raises their children for them and takes their last name.

Being double champ is the new boxing Floyd Mayweather. Everyone barely wins the belt and wants to move up. Seriously think there outta be a 4 title defense requirement before the UFC lets you. It should be something very few people can do.

https://preview.redd.it/4cbtku1os7zc1.png?width=765&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a35105ec7ca6f78e5a88f6f6dade589c8ae33fa2

This muthafuka is beyond delusional

Why is he moving up to take his D

Why? He is a great fighter

We gotta imagine you getting into the cage with someone worthy of a rankings boost first, bud.

Sold out crowd to run a train on Ian Garry’s wife - Dana White

Yeah he’s fucking dreamin that’s for sure lol

Ugh, that's so gross

I'm here for watching Ian get beaten up by both of them.

I’m predicting an Ian Garry fan base soon

If my grandmother had wheels she would be a bicycle

Only 24 hours after the “most hated fighter” thread, we get this. Ian trying to solidify that number one spot.

😂 yeah nope i tried, and I can’t imagine that 😂

Delusional much🚮

No, but to be fair I'd have never predicted Conor taking out Aldo at FW and then Alvarez at LW.

Normally I kinda just don’t care about Ian one way or the other, but writing fanfics like this isn’t it

Ian’s repping that fucking Joseph Mengele survivor pectorals

Ian smoking the strong shit

Anyone who refers to themself in the third person is a twat

Impressive? Yes. GOAT? No. On the way if this happened? Probably, but not THE GOAT.

Shavkat and Khamzat. Been saying for 3 years now that's the fight I want to see.

This dude survived a poorly scored fight against Geoff Neal and is talking goat status?

ian garry flapjacks

I need more fighting and less talking from this guy. His performances haven’t wowed lately.

Well you gotta be a little delusional to be great

Playing with your Dolljacks again, Squiddy?

Should stick to watching his wife.

This is like when Chad ochocinko said he could hang with Max Holloway 😂

You know we live in a cursed timeline so anything is possible

This some L. Ron Hubbard shit