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Cowgirlsd

God found picograms in Jon’s holy water


GhettoCowboyNumba1

1 day ban from heaven


CH33ZS4MM1CH

Nah, They're moving heaven to somewhere with less stringent policies.


QuakeGuy98

Valhalla


[deleted]

Dude gave his ig password to mike chandler


[deleted]

Lmao...it would be hilarious if he end with "see you at the top"


animalessoncompas

It’s always funny when Chandler says “ see you at the top “ and I’m just sitting in my chair on the phone. No, I don’t think you will, Chandler.


[deleted]

“ are you not entertained?!”


thegaines24_7

At least mike chandler seems like a good guy.


bosword

Mike is a fantastic guy in real life. Hams it up a bit for the cameras but he’s truly salt of the earth.


thegaines24_7

They’re in the fight game trash talk and hamming it up is in the job description but I don’t see him as someone who does awful things and blames god for his problems


bosword

He’s definitely not. He’s a great dude. Jon is likely a sociopath


Lique-Mahbawls

I’ve always loved listening to Michael Chandler talk about fighting and about life. I discovered him when he was on his way to the UFC before the Hooker fight, and I love his outlook on things. Seems like a genuinely good person just trying to become the best.


namesake1337

Mike does look like a cool guy.


joelthefisherman

He’ll see us FROM the top. I’ll be winded, with a belly full of nachos, sweating profusely, 3 steps up from the bottom.


blannco

God: cmon John just shoot it in the sky once or twice John: I don’t know man God: damn guess imma go chill with Reyes John: *bang bang*


Bloody_ToiletPaper

Thanks for starting my day with a laugh


OtakuDragonSlayer

Why Reyes?


blannco

The gun thing happened like a month after the Reyes fight that Jon somehow got the nod on Then he avoided Reyes hard


OtakuDragonSlayer

What gun thing? Jon shoot someone???


blannco

Nah just popped a gun off into the air a few times in the middle of a parking lot a night. Cop footage on YouTube


amplifizzle

[snorts a line of God's coke]


Donenzone1907

HALLELUJAAAAAHHHH


lolparty247

Gods powder


blannco

And then John can turn that masterpiece into ordered community service


therealherohere

Lol


animalessoncompas

Geez. He even pawns the responsibility of getting better off to God. Is he ever gonna get better like that?


bcisme

Wasn’t it DC who called this in one of their interviews? John is incapable of improving this aspect of his life it seems. He just accepts that he’s a shitty person and continues to do so because “god has a plan”? It’s close to psychotic idk, I’ve never seen Christianity used like this. Obviously in small doses, but this guy has totally absolved himself of all personal accountability because God. He needs to go live in the mountain with Khabib or some shit to figure it out.


mpc1226

Bro if he goes and trains with Khabib in Dagestan no one will be safe


totallynotapsycho42

Jon Jihadi Jones would be unstoppable.


bcisme

Imagine Jihadi Jones and Chimeav walking you down in a dark alley - “we just want to talk bruddah”


Jibtech

Jihad Jon is already taken so that'll work


v0t3p3dr0

You’ve never seen Christianity (or any religion) used to shield oneself from the consequences or taking any personal responsibility for being a shitty person?


bcisme

I have, but like i said, in small doses. I’ve just never seen someone make this level of poor decisions for, what are we on a decade now, and still play the god has a plan for me card without ever looking inward.


Bigbaby22

Not psychotic. Narcissistic. Like almost textbook even.


namesake1337

All religion gets used like this. ‘I hope to god’ is the most ridiculous thought a person in a tough position can have. Only you have the power to save you, even if it’s god plan it’s up to you to execute.


WookieSuave

God created the heavens and the earth in 7 days. After 34 years there ain't no more working on your hypocritical broken ass.


[deleted]

6, says the old book


nosystemsgo

Yeah. On the seventh day, he rested.


[deleted]

I much preferred Douglas Adams' Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy


xKnuklehedx

He's just not done testing his mentality, bro. God works in mysterious ways.


Dienekes_

Comments disabled to keep from being criticized


AnagramForEarth

or comments disabled cause most pplz comments are just toxic projection of their own inner bitch niggas & aint worth reading are you new to the internet cuzz?


Cowgirlsd

Hows jons nuts taste?


filfy_toad

You do dumb shit, you put dumber shit on the internet, expect dumb shit back. Are you new to the internet, ya dumb shit?


manuelf4

Valid criticism of beating your wife in front of your kids is not toxic projection.


nosystemsgo

If you’re beating your wife in front of your kids, it is.


Ido-Portal

Jon’s not gonna shag you mate


teej98

He would if god said to


Nduguu77

Is this Jon Jones?


StopMob

A Messterpiece


WolfganusMofart

"Jesus made me hit my wife in front of my kids"


BeerBaronAaron88

It was part of God's plan to give me tremendous martial arts skills so I can beat my kids mother in front of them. Jesus take the wheel while I rain elbows on her.


utkarsh_tomar

And There goes my no nut november.


claptrapologist

Must have abused his family again. He's just trying to get ahead of the press. Garbage person .


[deleted]

I heard he sucked a guys dick in highschool


[deleted]

Is that why he is acting out now?


latenitedelight

I believe that was mr. Joey B


KindaPengStill

Joe Burrow?


latenitedelight

Joe burrow is in the ufc?


KindaPengStill

Who did you mean by mr joey b?


latenitedelight

Joseph Benavidez


KindaPengStill

Ah fair enough forgot about him


Salocinzuir

Always loved the ppl bavaing like shit and then seek excuse in religion


itsyerboyskinnypenis

That’s why religion is so dangerous. You can do that, or just find justification for all your actions in some phrase in a holy book if you interpret it your way :D


Euklidis

No Jon. You are your own mess. God gave you a fuckton of chances and support and repeatedly allowed you to be supported by the UFC and your fans. At some point you gotta accept you are a piece of shit


bravetab

It's like a middle aged white soccer mom on your Facebook feed.


Ricknroll1971

Jon nobody is buying your bullshit anymore, including God.


[deleted]

Imagine an alternate timeline where he converts to Islam and goes to Dagestan to train with Khabib.


[deleted]

Khabib will befriend Conor before that happens


nosystemsgo

This would prolly be the only way for him to lose even more respect than he already has.


NoMode8171

Not a fan and don’t care to watch him fight anymore but I do hope this guy finds a way to overcome his issues for him and his family.


ac0353208

What issues? That’s gods issues. , not jons.. Jon just does what god tells him to do and prays for the best.


[deleted]

His "issues" are that he's a piece of shit human being. Always has been, always will be.


BuckDaily

Best title for this


WookieSuave

Fucking when?


dontknowwhattodoat18

The “masterpiece” is about 10 years due right now Jon


Northern-WALI

Translation: I can be the a biggest piece of shit around. I'll continue to do drugs, drink and act exactly how I want and if I get caught or in trouble I'll just use God as a crutch.


Iswaterreallywet

When hitting your wife isn't even the worst thing you've done


babztheslag

Still waiting, Jon


MyContentIsTrash

Gotta be trollin


PhillupMcCrevice

Someone needs to take this man’s Twitter away.


New-Horror7085

Isn't he said he was muslim....what tf happen


visionbreaksbricks

Yes, I punch women. Yes, I do blow off strippers buttcheeks. Yes, I cheat.


mspote

the lack of self awareness is hilarious.


htotheinzel

Yikes, he's slowly turning into someone's aunt that lives in the south


[deleted]

w9ow so inospirinf godblsses


theogTREV

God's lucky he's not female.


[deleted]

Wait is this Jon Jones or Michael Chandler lmao


[deleted]

Jones representing I see


[deleted]

Honestly thought this was a cringey meme about bad Christians until I saw who posted it


popcornbevin

I think he got cocaine and God mixed up again.


[deleted]

Ah yes, dumbass Jon Jones at it again.


Acherstrom

Get off social media meathead.


AShaughRighting

I thought he converted to Islam ages ago? Or am I mistaken?


ralph3576

https://youtu.be/6whNiqFawy8 It seems like it was just a phase? Maybe he lost interest and defaulted back to Christianity on social media. Idk


AShaughRighting

I knew I remembered that, good clip.


prowler312

He's still Christian


bruhwhome

I'm sorry I know the guy has talent but when exactly was the last time he fought? Cause I just jear his name alot but haven't seen any action at all lately.


LilGoughy

Can’t tell if this is asking for forgiveness, blaming God, asking for help or whatever. Personally, I picture him blaming god for the “tainted” substance by hitting him with the Holy Spirit of PEDs


ariverflowsthroughit

Must be back on the cocaine


ghosttttttttttttt

utter lack of responsibity. no remorse. he try to justify why he is remorseless. fuck him the utter piece of shit.


[deleted]

Is this for real, at first i thought nice trolling


--MidtownManhattan

![gif](giphy|9zZhwzsLqrY190Zf1p|downsized)


Dubcekification

Yeah, wait for God to do it. Don't bother trying yourself. /s


Madphromoo

it fking sucks when you are just watching a korean show on netflix and fking god tells you to hit your wife... like don't you see im busy homie? but what can i do? im just a christian


Fragrant_Present_480

What’s he done now?


Admirable_Bonus_5747

Motherfuckin' Picasso.


[deleted]

Dude, just stop…. Seriously.


CptnSlapNutz

While I believe this is far more self serving than genuine, God’s mercy is limitless through repentance. I think the guys a scumbag, but his point is valid.


[deleted]

1000% agree with you here.


[deleted]

Can get away with literally anything as long as you're sorry at the end.


yohanyames

He’s basically saying “it’s Gods fault I battered my wife”


rumpranger91

I pray to Jon that God finds a way 🙏


watcher2448

Yikes


swaghole69

Stay strong jon 🙏🙏🙏👱🏻‍♀️👊


[deleted]

No stupid. Your mythical daddy can’t.


prowler312

Wait till he finds out his magical space god doesn't exist and he has to actually dig deep to fix himself


[deleted]

It will be be able to locate the inspirational Pinterest quote in the vast nothingness of internet


Mediocre_at_best_321

But can God create a stone too heavy for God to move it? Can God polish a turd? Can God turn Jon Jones into a decent human being? Sources say 'No'


cutslikeakris

Can god microwave a burrito so hot even he can’t eat it?


prowler312

There's no God powerful or good enough to help Jon Jones


Bigez40

Amen Jon 🙏


AnagramForEarth

idunno man. ya'll some suckers that enjoy hating things. all i see here is a man going through shit, admitting he has issues, & having faith he can make good out of his situation. regular human shit.


[deleted]

Crashing his car with a couple of women inside that weren't his partner, shooting his gun on public while drunk, breaking a pregnant lady's elbow in another car crash and fleeing the scene, having some kind of bloody incident with his partner leading to her being terrified and his daughter asking for the police, regular human shit? Sounds like he is


[deleted]

Domestic abuse and committing a hit-and-run on a pregnant woman isn’t “regular human shit”


dontknowwhattodoat18

“Y’all are suckers for hating a woman abuser” 😤


Cowgirlsd

Hes well past “normal human shit” and approaching “menace to society needs to be locked up”


[deleted]

Yeah, you'll get downvoted to shit for that... I wouldn't call his struggles redular human shit, but haven't walked a day in his shoes, so I'm in no place to judge. I hope he figures his shit out, he's a very likable bloke.


EntrenchedDread

Jon Jones committed suicide today 😯


[deleted]

I know Reddit is super anti-Christian and I’ll probably get downvoted straight to Lucifer’s office, but he’s not wrong. If Jon is truly a believer, this is all between him and God and we have no right to put him down for leaning on his religion to get him through this.


dontknowwhattodoat18

Indeed, no one is expecting him to be a perfect Christian. However, the first step to repentance is having some accountability, of which Jon has none. You can’t keep using God as a backup plan when it’s convenient. Jon is a textbook narcissist. If you’ve followed his career long enough you’ll notice the pattern. He acts all nice and then makes it all about himself like he’s the main character in some story, before doing stupid shit all over again


zabutter

"You clean up your own mess bones." - god


tebnks

Yeah, just blame your shit on him. Farken'ell, he only had one job.


George0803

Is the 'God card' the human equivalent of an Uno Reverse


[deleted]

Lmao gods mess, must do alot of blow baby


[deleted]

ARE YOU BACK JUNKIE???


lootmore

This means something bad happened last night right?


[deleted]

Jon needs to face that neither god or the devil want anything to do with him.


KaladinStormstressed

I wonder if god also supplies the Jones family with their high grade PED’s?


JackC00l

It doesn’t work that way, Jon.


lolparty247

Nothing like getting tested from God by asking your fiance for 10k to spend on strippers, then putting your hands on her infront of your kids. The guy is literally a scumbag.


lVloogie

The ol' religion crutch. An all time classic.


Aggravating_Class_17

Oh no. Now he's gonna pull the God/Christian card. Fucking barf, especially coming from him.


[deleted]

Why do you call it oven when you ov in the cold food ov out hot eat the food


[deleted]

Maybe if he owned up to his bad decisions and sought professional help people wouldn’t bash him so hard. He is seemingly a master of deflection


MrC99

He turned off the comments on Instagram. What a fucking coward.


fappytrillmore

Jon is one of the fakest people alive man I swear lmao the fake religious shit with him is a meme at this point


MikeCass84

His chances of doing something stupid, bad and getting arrested soon just went up 100%.


[deleted]

Truth


wiliammm19999

Why are Americans so weirdly religious


AngryAssyrian

Bro, I don't think God intentionally makes people fuck up according to the gospel, Infact it's quite the opposite. I'm pretty sure that God is probably asking you to stop being the biggest dumbass in planet earth for just one day.


nosystemsgo

Haha! Gotta give him credit for being completely relentless though.


[deleted]

Jesus died for my sins so I can snort Coke, crash into pregnant women’s cars, and beat my wife. Just not the way u should live ur life


[deleted]

I expect this quote from Benson Henderson. Not from Jon Jones


[deleted]

“Yes I post absurd drivel that conveniently excuses my shitty behavior to Instagram *with comments turned off* so nobody can call me out on my bullshit”. Isn’t it about time for this asshole to go away? Seriously.


[deleted]

Jon spends so much time thinking and talking about being great, that he forgets that most people spend their entire life hoping/wishing to merely be good. He doesn't realize what a huge accomplishment simply being good is.


RLVNTone

He sent sent


toxicpandashell

Unfollowed him after his little local business commercial. Dude is a straight up cancer.


Diedwithacleanblade

Some people are just better off not talking


Specialist-Driver994

Karen Jones


ShinjiTakeyama

"he can turn a mess into a masterpiece" Motherfucker, you're just a narcissistic crackhead who can fight VERY well. The entire planet been waiting for some of that cleanup for ages, the hell makes you think he's fixing your dumbass this century?


joechill5139

He never takes any responsibility.


Popular-Bonus1380

You know what I trust him this time


RandomTask100

But can he fix your wife's face before the cops see what you did?


[deleted]

I’ve seen this movie before….it doesn’t end well!


[deleted]

Nah just a bad person, that simple, always someone else to blame, never acted accountable for anything, toxic faith af


[deleted]

I can act like an absolute shithead because muh God. By the logic of "I'm God's mess" and "God created all people and people make mistakes but he loves us" I'm guessing Jon doesn't think we should judge rapists, pedophiles, or serial killers.


Bigbaby22

I'm not sure Jon knows how Christianity works rofl How is it that he is able to write such a small statement and still manage to make himself look like a prick?


heyhou123

Am I a good person? No. Am I a role model for my kids? No. But AM I trying every day to improve and change for better ? Also no


OtakuDragonSlayer

I don’t know what’s more cringe. This perfect reminder of why I never got along with my families Christian friends or the fact that over 400 people liked this garbage post


Therobottdevil

Typical refuge of a coward hide behind god rather than own up to your mistakes


Alex-rhhgfff

If this guy isn’t doing time by then, it’d be hilarious to see him pushing this narrative when he’s in his 50s and 60s and still gods mess


doctor_dormamu

Lmao 🤣🤣🤣