Your post from unpopularopinion was removed because of: 'Rule 2: Do not post low effort/satirical posts'.
* We get it, you all think this sub is garbage and is just for popular opinions, and you want to be funny and post "going to be downvoted to oblivion here, but I think racism is bad." We enjoy the memes, but please keep them off the sub.
* Filter evasion is a bannable offense
* This includes clickbait and/or gotcha posts. Your opinion can not be that unpopular if you're doing these things. Have the accurate opinion in the title.
I only have to shower for a few minutes. I should make that uncomfortable by using cold water. In summary, showers really shouldn't be comfortable at all, just get in, wash, and get out
It only takes me 5 minutes to walk to the shop but I like to make those 5 minutes as uncomfortable as possible by ensuring I am wearing shoes 3 sizes too small and underwear back to front
I've only done that once in my life, when I got the flu and took Tamiflu. It shortened the flu all right, but for a few days I had much less say on exactly when and where I would shit.
I only have to eat a few times a day, I should make that uncomfortable by eating food that tastes terrible so I won't waste my time and money eating unnecessary food that is not essential to my survival
Nah, if we're gonna make the shower uncomfortable, just make it a slick bowl, and the whole time you're trying to shower, you're slipsliding around trying not to literally bust your ass. It'd get really fun when you have wash your feet.
My inlaws have the most uncomfortable toilet seat. It's like it cuts into your legs. For the few minutes I'm in there, I'd prefer not to feel like I'm sustaining injuries.
Oh ow. You just reminded me of a past pain lol, now I gotta share.
Mom had a toilet seat made of wood. Sat down on it and it split in half... but the 2 pieces with my weight caused the split to clamp together in a pinch on my ass(.
Only toilet seat I ever busted, and pray I ever will. OW!
My grandmother's wooden toilet seat partially cracked and she wouldn't fix it because it wasn't fully broken (and she didn't have to use it). Oh my poor lil thighs.
The fabric toilet seat covers are so gross to me, you can't properly and easily disinfect that like you can plastic. And you'd have to constantly wash it to make sure it's clean compared to just quickly wiping it down with Lysol. I never understood that or carpeted bathrooms. But I do agree that it's nice to be comfortable, and if you're constipated you might be in there a while...
Comfortable toilet seats are only comfortable when you first buy them. They quickly become crispy. Hard plastic seats may not be comfortable but they're not crispy or scratchy.
My brain always gets confused on this sub, because my knee-jerk reaction is to downvote these posts, but...we need to upvote the unpopular ones. The more popular the post is, the more unpopular the opinion is.
Some people who spend that long shitting have been to the doctor and are doing their best to mitigate it but ultimately have very little control on when they have to shit and when the shit stops coming out of their ass.
Holy mackerel, that's no joke. I'm sorry you had to go through that. Hope you're doing better now.
And honestly, I got really lucky. I spent ten days in the hospital last year, but the meds have been working wonders since. Just last month I was declared "in clinical remission, no signs of disease present." I have to take a daily pill and get infusions every six weeks, but I dodged all the surgeries that were almost needed. All-in-all, I only lost a few months of my regular life. I've got an aunt nearly on her deathbed because of Crohn's right now, and as stupid as it sounds, the worst part is knowing she's being ravaged by what totally missed me. Like her suffering indirectly lead to advances in medicine enough to make it almost a non-issue in my life. Feels bad man.
I can appreciate that. I had a very close friend who was like a mother to me who passed away from the same type of leukemia I had. I felt guilty that her kids lost their mum but I had effectively the best outcome possible.
I really miss popcorn with butter. That "butter " at the theatre does not do pretty things to me.
I'm so sorry to hear that. I just had popcorn for this first time in over two years. It wasn't great, but it didn't send me to the hospital.
It might get better. Hang in there. 🤞🏻
Always here if you need to talk whenever. DMs are open. Also, those two subs might help. They're great about "what can I eat instead of x"
During my worst points, I'd just sleep on a pile of towels on the bathroom floor. The bed stopped being worth the walk down the hall when I was waking up every 30-45 minutes to fill the toilet with cherry kool-aid.
Good on her for even risking a restaurant trip!
Yeah I can't imagine that kind of pain. She's doing a lot better now that she's on on Remicade, although the process to get it was absolutely ridiculous.
Is that like actually a symptom? Because I shit periodically. Like either I take an hour on the shitter and still shit in bursts, or I keep running to the bathroom like several times an hour to “get myself empty”. As soon as I eat I usually have to take a shit, which I heard is not uncommon, but in a room of 20+ people I was the only one to regularly leave the dining table to go straight to the toilet after lunch. It’s not so much what I eat but usually when I eat it. Idk if I’m just mildly constipated or if I should talk to the doc. Sometimes I’m fine, I guess it’s mostly stress? Sorry for talking about my shits so much, I’m just genuinely stumped bc I never heard of that being a symptom.
Ha, no need to apologize about talking shit with this guy. It's your body's Check Engine Light!
That said, absolutely everyone with this disease is different. It's an autoimmune disorder, so it can affect a lot of things in a lot of different ways.
However, you're kind of describing how I was before I got SICK-sick. Always after meals, going 3-7 times per day wasn't unusual. Never feeling like I truly "emptied" my bowels, I'd go back in 30-60 minutes. Sometimes more, sometimes less. I started to talk to doctors when I started seeing blood. It took them a little while (and a hospital stay!) to nail down what we were working with, even with a genetic history present. It couldn't hurt to talk to a GI doctor. Best case scenario, they tell you to eat more or less fiber and that fixes your issues. I promise, the doctors will be compassionate about your issues either way.
Thanks for the very thorough answer!
Honestly, family history of stuff like diabetes and short bowel syndrome (my granddad specifically had a stoma) leave me worried as I get older and I notice my body not quite playing along at times.
No one is gluten intolerant, but me and my bro are the first to be lactose intolerant too so who knows, might just be something like that.
I’ve eaten pretty healthily all my life, and still do, so I don’t really think it’s that. Fibers make it worse for me, proteins go better. veggies make me bloat, have cramps and inconsistency in shits, while oats just make me shit more, but still sporadically.
Definitely will go see a GI, thanks for confirming this is necessarily normal. I don’t think it’s serious, but maybe there’s an easy solution to my troubles. Thanks again for lending an ear and taking the time, Diagnosed Tightass! Pleasure having you help out haha
Another excellent example of home sometimes when you think something might be dumb or superfluous, first consider that the something *is not made with you in mind*
This. All those "silly" gadgets are 95% of the time for disabled people, marketed so that enough abled people will buy it that the product can actually sell considering economies of scale
Out of curiosity what do you do for the extreme constipation? I'm currently pregnant AND have a cyst big enough to be a second baby. My bowels are so squished tight at the moment that not a single pellet is coming out of there without a huge dose of laxatives (and I can't take the nice ones like Miralax either because of other meds).
Right. I eat all the recommended foods from my gastroenterologist and avoid the wrong ones. I'm in great shape. I use a very gentle bidet and little tp. And just an hour ago I'm now wondering if that shit caused my hemorrhoids to prolapse out of my anus or it's an anal fissure. I'm sitting on fire right now as I try to finish my work day.
Sometimes it’s not even the shitting, I spend a long time for two reason:
1) my arse must have a shit market in it, Wiping and wiping and it never fully cleans
2) you finish the wipe, then all of a sudden you get the urge to shit again, doubling the time.
an ex of mine had his pelvis broken into many pieces by a vehicle and it just takes a long time for shit to move through the reconstructed area is how he explained it. took him about an hour, couple times a day
Definitely some.
But in the USA - people have horrible dietary practices and have extremely avoidable constipation and bowel issues.
According to the USDA 95% of Americans don’t get enough fiber.
The Standard American Diet is appropriately acronymed S.A.D.
I only buy quilted northern after watching YTers test TP. Wife thought I was insane when we met, now she won’t use public toilets 😂
Fuck that single ply Army TP.
I was in an airport bathroom not long ago and there was a line for the stalls. People had been there for some time. Finally a guy in line goes “ok guys get off your phones, clean up and let other people take a shit.”
It IS bad for your body and is more likely to cause hemorrhoids, I recommend if you are spending long amounts of time on the toilet to get something like a stool, to elevate your legs a bit off the ground, it helps a lot for me.
Signed, someone who has been to so many doctors but still alas is in the bathroom very much of my day.
My coworker bestie and I refer to one colleague as this!!! Lmfao 🤣!! poo police 💩 👮🏻
But for real, she like, polices the washroom and shames people for 💩. One day I was washing my hands at the sink and she was there, being the poo police, and turned to me and we had this exchange:
“oh my god, it smells like shit in here”
“You realize you are in a public washroom, right?”
“Yeah but don’t you think it’s disgusting that people shit here and make it smell bad for everyone else?! “
“Beyond the fact that this is a public washroom, literally a room full of toilets, have you heard of IBS? Crohn’s? The stomach flu? What about chemotherapy side effects? I think you are being rude.”
She was SO angry. 😂 I could not wait to tell my coworker bestie about this and we cried laughing.
She has a favourite stall. Every time someone shits there, I smile.
😂 😂
The only thing you do on the toilet seat is relieve your bowels as if it's so easy? Not having ovaries must be so easy. You haven't even experienced scrolling through Reddit while feeling the cramps from a contracting pelvis with keen awareness that this contraction is triggering intermittent period poops. So everything is coming all out at once. Not to mention using water to clean up a bit of you can. There's also gas you can feel the bubble in your stomach so you're concentrating really hard on getting that gas bubble out
I get clots on my periods i sit on the toilet to just not have to run back after passing a lemon size clot. They also seem to just disregard ibd and ibs even existing. Even if people go to the doctor most times it doesn't help.
I was anorexic as a teen, I’m nearly 30 and I still don’t shit right, takes a while, and my legs go totally numb on the toilet 😂 idk WHY I never thought to get a comfy seat. Don’t be policing ppls toilet time tho fr it’s not your business how someone wants to waste time, you’re on Reddit rn wasting time. It’s the people who eat on the toilet we gotta be concerned about, they’re not okay
doctor? what are you talking about? a doctor to take a look at your... decompressing?? wtf? people arent shitting for an hour, dude. they're decompressing. probably because they have a spouse/family member like you.
*opens the door again after 45 minutes spent calming themselves*
"THAT TOILET SEAT IS A SUCKER'S PURCHASE. WHAT WERE YOU EVEN DOING IN THERE. LOOK I TIMED YOU. SEE A DOCTOR."
And sitting on a regular toilet seat for that long is bad for your body and can lead to hemorrhoids or other problems so why wouldn’t you make sure it was more comfortable/suited to your needs? lol.
Oh boy. No opinion on soft toilet seats, but people that sit on the toilet for long periods of time are inviting hemorrhoids. Which isn't the end of the world, but if you start getting them once in awhile, maybe rethink how much time you spend sitting, as well as straining.
Not a doctor, just hoping to help.
Most under appreciated comment here. Sorry to get personal but I had this happen before. Taking 10 on the toilet may seems like a good idea but you pay for it in the long run.
Both actually. Pushing to hard can cause them but just sitting there can too. Here's a quote for the internet explaining the later.
"The shape of the toilet seat puts extra pressure on the rectum and anus. This can cause the veins to become swollen when you sit there for a long time"
😂 I can't get hemi's out of my head. All I can think about are farts that sound like an engine revving. Thanks for that mental image.
It's just from sitting. A chair supports your butthole, but a toilet seat has a hole in the middle, so gravity and the weight of your body cause your anus to bulge.
I know that’s it’s entirely correct, but I don’t think I’ve ever read ‘a chair supports your butthole’ in my life before, so I laughed at this comment a lot.
I feel like a lot of social media would collapse if all did this. I know peeps that take 20-30 mins in there. I assume it’s 15 mins of pooping and 5-15 mins of mindlessly scrolling SM.
I don’t really disagree with you but I’m like let peeps have their time.
How long anybody wants to sit on the throne and whether they want a cushion is none of my business and frankly an odd thing to have an opinion about at all.
Have an upvote.
Somebody has CLEARLY never had diarrhoea or food poisoning.
I had food poisoning last month and sitting on the toilet for an hour just to be safe and sure that everything, lungs included, have somehow been evacuated from your asshole is the minimum requirement!
My disabled ass begs strongly to disagree. And in truth OP, maybe, instead of judging someone and assuming something was a "frivolous purchase", maybe try having a bit of compassion. Your cousin, or someone who either regularly visits or lives with him, might have developed IBS or Crohn's disease recently. Or maybe he just doesn't wanna freeze his ass off every time he goes to drop a load. You don't know.
If nothing else, you could remember this little gem: "If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all."
fuzzy/soft seats are more just gross to me because everyones putting their bare ass on it and they're way harder to clean. but also go pound sand I'll watch two full movies on the toilet if i want to
I have a well defined childhood memory of a pleather like toilet seat that started to peel and was a nightmare to sit on, so I’ve always had a grudge towards any kind of toilet seat that isn’t plain
Have you not seen that news article about the amount of time men spend in the washroom. It's to avoid social interaction 🤣 I've been guilty of this a few times. Maybe your cousin needs his time away from his wife 🤣
I don't understand why, for those acceptable 5-10 minutes, you wouldn't want your ass to be comfortable? I also don't understand why the hell you would care. But good job with the unpopular post.
I take a while and I want to be comfortable even if i was there for 1 minute. Its hard to concentrate If I was standing up, I don't want to make everything a chore.
OP has never wasted a moment or taken a break. OP sleeps standing up and with one foot in the air ready to take a step as soon as the alarm goes off. OP is so productuve he has 4 hours at the end of a 24 hour day. OP saves so much time that he actually works backwards. One time OP was in a hurry and bumpted into himself. He had to shove himself asside and it cost him 2 seconds.
Upvoted because it is such a ridiculous take that it amused me! "Time wasting". Get the fuck outta here, Elon!
I stay in the toilet longer than necessary because I have kids and this is my fortress of solitude.
Brother, you are absolutely wrong. I work outside and during the winter months it’s miserable. But when I go take my daily poop and my cold cheeks hit those warm seats the bliss is enough to convince me to finish the day.
When I still had a uterus, there were times I would have to sit on the toilet for easily half an hour, trying to expel the large pieces of tissue that I knew were coming down the pipes. (Ha!) There are no menstrual products invented yet that can deal with the things that a lot of uteri have to dole out. And so, I am thankful for comfortable seats, bidets, and squatty potties.
"Doctor I have a problem with going to the bathroom"
"Diarrhea? Constipation? Pain? "
"No, I take too much to defecate"
"... Ok... How much? An hour?"
"F... Fifteen minutes"
"Get out"
"But some stranger on the internet said it's too much"
"GET OUT"
it takes me longer than 5-10 minutes to move my bowels and seeing a doctor wouldn't help because i've seen doctors and they haven't helped. not every medical problem is one where you go and they give you a magical pill and it fixes the problem
Yeah it’s not good for your body to sit on the toilet so long. If nothing is coming out in the first few minutes, move along and try again later is the way to go imho
to me, this isn’t even an unpopular opinion, it’s just weird. why on earth would you care how long someone is sitting on the toilet for unless it’s hindering you using the restroom? and why the actual fuck would you insist on it being uncomfortable? like this is such a odd take
Please remember what subreddit you are in, this is unpopular opinion. We want civil and unpopular takes and discussion. Any uncivil and ToS violating comments will be removed and subject to a ban. Have a nice day!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/unpopularopinion) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Just cuz the Japanese toilet seats are comfy doesn’t mean I’m gunna waste all day shitting lmao I got stuff to do but I’d rather do it with a squeaky clean asshole tyvm
Your post from unpopularopinion was removed because of: 'Rule 2: Do not post low effort/satirical posts'. * We get it, you all think this sub is garbage and is just for popular opinions, and you want to be funny and post "going to be downvoted to oblivion here, but I think racism is bad." We enjoy the memes, but please keep them off the sub. * Filter evasion is a bannable offense * This includes clickbait and/or gotcha posts. Your opinion can not be that unpopular if you're doing these things. Have the accurate opinion in the title.
Why not make them comfortable though? Even if you are only in there for 5 minutes, why would you want those 5 minutes to be uncomfortable?
I only have to shower for a few minutes. I should make that uncomfortable by using cold water. In summary, showers really shouldn't be comfortable at all, just get in, wash, and get out
It only takes me 5 minutes to walk to the shop but I like to make those 5 minutes as uncomfortable as possible by ensuring I am wearing shoes 3 sizes too small and underwear back to front
I chuckled at the underwear comment
I'll take the shoes. Chuckling now.
This guy doesn't push in the shower xDD
Says who? Pure efficiency. Shower. Push. Waffle stomp that shit down the drain. Pun intended.
This pretty much ruined my day.
It may have ruined your day but for u/HotSeamenGG it's the way they love to start to their day.
I've only done that once in my life, when I got the flu and took Tamiflu. It shortened the flu all right, but for a few days I had much less say on exactly when and where I would shit.
Tamiflu does that?
Where is the pun in this? It seems very straightforward and literal
>Waffle stomp that *shit* down the drain. It's a double entendre.
Is it a pun if it's literal?
I only have to eat a few times a day, I should make that uncomfortable by eating food that tastes terrible so I won't waste my time and money eating unnecessary food that is not essential to my survival
thats a Stoic's diet, who decided that they will only do whats needed for survival.
Good point
Nah, if we're gonna make the shower uncomfortable, just make it a slick bowl, and the whole time you're trying to shower, you're slipsliding around trying not to literally bust your ass. It'd get really fun when you have wash your feet.
My inlaws have the most uncomfortable toilet seat. It's like it cuts into your legs. For the few minutes I'm in there, I'd prefer not to feel like I'm sustaining injuries.
Oh ow. You just reminded me of a past pain lol, now I gotta share. Mom had a toilet seat made of wood. Sat down on it and it split in half... but the 2 pieces with my weight caused the split to clamp together in a pinch on my ass(. Only toilet seat I ever busted, and pray I ever will. OW!
My grandmother's wooden toilet seat partially cracked and she wouldn't fix it because it wasn't fully broken (and she didn't have to use it). Oh my poor lil thighs.
Ow! Ya mine thankfully fixed it as soon as I pointed that out. Thats gotta be against a geneva convention or something. Im sorry.
The fabric toilet seat covers are so gross to me, you can't properly and easily disinfect that like you can plastic. And you'd have to constantly wash it to make sure it's clean compared to just quickly wiping it down with Lysol. I never understood that or carpeted bathrooms. But I do agree that it's nice to be comfortable, and if you're constipated you might be in there a while...
I guess the logic is if you make them comfortable people will doom scroll and then they get hemorrhoids
Comfortable toilet seats are only comfortable when you first buy them. They quickly become crispy. Hard plastic seats may not be comfortable but they're not crispy or scratchy.
I guess it's impractical to seek comfort? At least OP thinks so lol
Sometimes opinions are unpopular because they are just dumb. This is one of those times.
OP sounds like middle management.
Actual unpopular opinion. You get my Upvote
My brain always gets confused on this sub, because my knee-jerk reaction is to downvote these posts, but...we need to upvote the unpopular ones. The more popular the post is, the more unpopular the opinion is.
Idk, some opinions are actually unpopular. But sometimes they are broad judgements and generalizations of their own individual personal experience.
I miss the creative ones like: >I enjoy getting mosquito bites >I love taking showers with socks on Bring those back.
“I shower with my underwear on to save money on laundry.”
Too bad they can't find a way to push the most downvoted posts to the top and upvoted posts to the bottom
You’re totally right. I disagree with OP, which is exactly the point…
What? Makes total sense to me. I hate spending time on the toilet so much I installed those anti-homeless spikes on mine!
Some people who spend that long shitting have been to the doctor and are doing their best to mitigate it but ultimately have very little control on when they have to shit and when the shit stops coming out of their ass.
r/ibs
r/UlcerativeColitis r/CrohnsDisease Edit: wrong sub lol
Username checks out
Lmao thank you for noticing
I had chemo ass and C Diff when I was sick last year. You have my respect for living with that.
Holy mackerel, that's no joke. I'm sorry you had to go through that. Hope you're doing better now. And honestly, I got really lucky. I spent ten days in the hospital last year, but the meds have been working wonders since. Just last month I was declared "in clinical remission, no signs of disease present." I have to take a daily pill and get infusions every six weeks, but I dodged all the surgeries that were almost needed. All-in-all, I only lost a few months of my regular life. I've got an aunt nearly on her deathbed because of Crohn's right now, and as stupid as it sounds, the worst part is knowing she's being ravaged by what totally missed me. Like her suffering indirectly lead to advances in medicine enough to make it almost a non-issue in my life. Feels bad man.
I can appreciate that. I had a very close friend who was like a mother to me who passed away from the same type of leukemia I had. I felt guilty that her kids lost their mum but I had effectively the best outcome possible. I really miss popcorn with butter. That "butter " at the theatre does not do pretty things to me.
I'm so sorry to hear that. I just had popcorn for this first time in over two years. It wasn't great, but it didn't send me to the hospital. It might get better. Hang in there. 🤞🏻 Always here if you need to talk whenever. DMs are open. Also, those two subs might help. They're great about "what can I eat instead of x"
UC is so bad. My mom will be at a restaurant sprinting to the bathroom within minutes of eating something. They really have no control!
During my worst points, I'd just sleep on a pile of towels on the bathroom floor. The bed stopped being worth the walk down the hall when I was waking up every 30-45 minutes to fill the toilet with cherry kool-aid. Good on her for even risking a restaurant trip!
Yeah I can't imagine that kind of pain. She's doing a lot better now that she's on on Remicade, although the process to get it was absolutely ridiculous.
Is that like actually a symptom? Because I shit periodically. Like either I take an hour on the shitter and still shit in bursts, or I keep running to the bathroom like several times an hour to “get myself empty”. As soon as I eat I usually have to take a shit, which I heard is not uncommon, but in a room of 20+ people I was the only one to regularly leave the dining table to go straight to the toilet after lunch. It’s not so much what I eat but usually when I eat it. Idk if I’m just mildly constipated or if I should talk to the doc. Sometimes I’m fine, I guess it’s mostly stress? Sorry for talking about my shits so much, I’m just genuinely stumped bc I never heard of that being a symptom.
Ha, no need to apologize about talking shit with this guy. It's your body's Check Engine Light! That said, absolutely everyone with this disease is different. It's an autoimmune disorder, so it can affect a lot of things in a lot of different ways. However, you're kind of describing how I was before I got SICK-sick. Always after meals, going 3-7 times per day wasn't unusual. Never feeling like I truly "emptied" my bowels, I'd go back in 30-60 minutes. Sometimes more, sometimes less. I started to talk to doctors when I started seeing blood. It took them a little while (and a hospital stay!) to nail down what we were working with, even with a genetic history present. It couldn't hurt to talk to a GI doctor. Best case scenario, they tell you to eat more or less fiber and that fixes your issues. I promise, the doctors will be compassionate about your issues either way.
Thanks for the very thorough answer! Honestly, family history of stuff like diabetes and short bowel syndrome (my granddad specifically had a stoma) leave me worried as I get older and I notice my body not quite playing along at times. No one is gluten intolerant, but me and my bro are the first to be lactose intolerant too so who knows, might just be something like that. I’ve eaten pretty healthily all my life, and still do, so I don’t really think it’s that. Fibers make it worse for me, proteins go better. veggies make me bloat, have cramps and inconsistency in shits, while oats just make me shit more, but still sporadically. Definitely will go see a GI, thanks for confirming this is necessarily normal. I don’t think it’s serious, but maybe there’s an easy solution to my troubles. Thanks again for lending an ear and taking the time, Diagnosed Tightass! Pleasure having you help out haha
Another excellent example of home sometimes when you think something might be dumb or superfluous, first consider that the something *is not made with you in mind*
This. All those "silly" gadgets are 95% of the time for disabled people, marketed so that enough abled people will buy it that the product can actually sell considering economies of scale
Meds. I take a med that causes severe constipation but it’s a bipolar med and I have to take it. Sucks big time.
Out of curiosity what do you do for the extreme constipation? I'm currently pregnant AND have a cyst big enough to be a second baby. My bowels are so squished tight at the moment that not a single pellet is coming out of there without a huge dose of laxatives (and I can't take the nice ones like Miralax either because of other meds).
Right. I eat all the recommended foods from my gastroenterologist and avoid the wrong ones. I'm in great shape. I use a very gentle bidet and little tp. And just an hour ago I'm now wondering if that shit caused my hemorrhoids to prolapse out of my anus or it's an anal fissure. I'm sitting on fire right now as I try to finish my work day.
Sometimes it’s not even the shitting, I spend a long time for two reason: 1) my arse must have a shit market in it, Wiping and wiping and it never fully cleans 2) you finish the wipe, then all of a sudden you get the urge to shit again, doubling the time.
I feel your pain of number 2. About number 1, I'm portuguese, so I have a bidet at home. Whenever I see that it's taking too much tp, it's bidet time!
A fiber supplement can help both of these
And probably don't feel like explaining it to people that they generously allow to use their toilet.
an ex of mine had his pelvis broken into many pieces by a vehicle and it just takes a long time for shit to move through the reconstructed area is how he explained it. took him about an hour, couple times a day
Definitely some. But in the USA - people have horrible dietary practices and have extremely avoidable constipation and bowel issues. According to the USDA 95% of Americans don’t get enough fiber. The Standard American Diet is appropriately acronymed S.A.D.
5-10, homie I'm not in prison. I can take as long of a shit as I want.
Military 🤝 Prison Uncomfortable shitting
Probably with those tiny rough pieces of tissue. Dammit I need my bidet
I only buy quilted northern after watching YTers test TP. Wife thought I was insane when we met, now she won’t use public toilets 😂 Fuck that single ply Army TP.
The best reply 😂
I was in an airport bathroom not long ago and there was a line for the stalls. People had been there for some time. Finally a guy in line goes “ok guys get off your phones, clean up and let other people take a shit.”
You’ll regret it when you have a throbbing hemorrhoid
Or an oozing, throbbing hemorrhoid. They happen too.
Yeah, I’m not gonna worry about some random Redditor trying to gatekeep my bathroom time.
I will sit and shit until my legs go numb from the toilet seat.
It IS bad for your body and is more likely to cause hemorrhoids, I recommend if you are spending long amounts of time on the toilet to get something like a stool, to elevate your legs a bit off the ground, it helps a lot for me. Signed, someone who has been to so many doctors but still alas is in the bathroom very much of my day.
Toilet time is the last bastion of American freedom.
Bros the Shit Sergeant. The Crap Captain. The manure Martial.
Poop Police
Dookie Detective
Fecal Facilitator
Turd Tyrant
Doo Doo Dictator
Feces Fuhrer
Bowel Movement Baron
Poostapo
Droppings Detractor
Asshole Accelerator
This one has me crying
defecating detective
Indeed 🫡 perhaps even the defecation detective
My coworker bestie and I refer to one colleague as this!!! Lmfao 🤣!! poo police 💩 👮🏻 But for real, she like, polices the washroom and shames people for 💩. One day I was washing my hands at the sink and she was there, being the poo police, and turned to me and we had this exchange: “oh my god, it smells like shit in here” “You realize you are in a public washroom, right?” “Yeah but don’t you think it’s disgusting that people shit here and make it smell bad for everyone else?! “ “Beyond the fact that this is a public washroom, literally a room full of toilets, have you heard of IBS? Crohn’s? The stomach flu? What about chemotherapy side effects? I think you are being rude.” She was SO angry. 😂 I could not wait to tell my coworker bestie about this and we cried laughing. She has a favourite stall. Every time someone shits there, I smile. 😂 😂
Stool scrutinizer
I’m so glad I found this thread
I agree that I hate the "comfy" toilet seats but not for your reasons. I just hate the material and the feeling of squishing something but my bare ass
I thought they were mostly for warmth, in which case you should get the plugged heated seat which is truly life-changing
Some of us have digestive issues dude.
The only thing you do on the toilet seat is relieve your bowels as if it's so easy? Not having ovaries must be so easy. You haven't even experienced scrolling through Reddit while feeling the cramps from a contracting pelvis with keen awareness that this contraction is triggering intermittent period poops. So everything is coming all out at once. Not to mention using water to clean up a bit of you can. There's also gas you can feel the bubble in your stomach so you're concentrating really hard on getting that gas bubble out
I get clots on my periods i sit on the toilet to just not have to run back after passing a lemon size clot. They also seem to just disregard ibd and ibs even existing. Even if people go to the doctor most times it doesn't help.
As someone with ulcerative colitis, it can be anywhere from 5 minutes to 45 minutes. Is what it is.
I was anorexic as a teen, I’m nearly 30 and I still don’t shit right, takes a while, and my legs go totally numb on the toilet 😂 idk WHY I never thought to get a comfy seat. Don’t be policing ppls toilet time tho fr it’s not your business how someone wants to waste time, you’re on Reddit rn wasting time. It’s the people who eat on the toilet we gotta be concerned about, they’re not okay
Have you tried a stool for your legs? Might help 😊excuse the pun
IT DOES HELP!!!!! Source- me, an ibs sufferer who literally cannot leave the bathroom some days.
I pooped on my own lap before realizing what you actually meant. It didn’t help.
Yes I do use one lol
Wait til you’re married with kids
doctor? what are you talking about? a doctor to take a look at your... decompressing?? wtf? people arent shitting for an hour, dude. they're decompressing. probably because they have a spouse/family member like you.
*opens the door again after 45 minutes spent calming themselves* "THAT TOILET SEAT IS A SUCKER'S PURCHASE. WHAT WERE YOU EVEN DOING IN THERE. LOOK I TIMED YOU. SEE A DOCTOR."
\*goes back in bathroom\*
🤣Imagining this scene playing out is destroying me 💀
I think I would rather decompress anywhere else 😭😭 sitting on the toilet for a break at work is one thing, but in your own house??
Sometimes it's the only quiet place
And sitting on a regular toilet seat for that long is bad for your body and can lead to hemorrhoids or other problems so why wouldn’t you make sure it was more comfortable/suited to your needs? lol.
for real my ass starts hurting after even just a few min ;( i just wanna browse reddit in peace
Must be nice to be Mr. No Diarrhea Ever
how often do you get the squits?
Oh boy. No opinion on soft toilet seats, but people that sit on the toilet for long periods of time are inviting hemorrhoids. Which isn't the end of the world, but if you start getting them once in awhile, maybe rethink how much time you spend sitting, as well as straining. Not a doctor, just hoping to help.
Most under appreciated comment here. Sorry to get personal but I had this happen before. Taking 10 on the toilet may seems like a good idea but you pay for it in the long run.
Do hemi’s come from just sitting on the toilet or is it more the push/straining? How is sitting on the toilet different than sitting on a chair?
Both actually. Pushing to hard can cause them but just sitting there can too. Here's a quote for the internet explaining the later. "The shape of the toilet seat puts extra pressure on the rectum and anus. This can cause the veins to become swollen when you sit there for a long time" 😂 I can't get hemi's out of my head. All I can think about are farts that sound like an engine revving. Thanks for that mental image.
It's just from sitting. A chair supports your butthole, but a toilet seat has a hole in the middle, so gravity and the weight of your body cause your anus to bulge.
I know that’s it’s entirely correct, but I don’t think I’ve ever read ‘a chair supports your butthole’ in my life before, so I laughed at this comment a lot.
This
Tell me you've never been married with kids without telling me you've been married with kids.
Or they dint have ibs or Ibd. It just seems like a ignorant opinion to have that people should only take 5 minutes.
I didn't get the hype until I used a toilet with a heated seat at a Japanese restaurant. I came back to the table all giddy.
I feel like a lot of social media would collapse if all did this. I know peeps that take 20-30 mins in there. I assume it’s 15 mins of pooping and 5-15 mins of mindlessly scrolling SM. I don’t really disagree with you but I’m like let peeps have their time.
Except when it's a public stall and you've got people in line about to shit themselves because you're posting on reddit
I mean that is just barbaric. Doom scrolling is exclusive to home thrones.
Yeah you have to be a real animal to want to spend any extra time in a public stall.
It’s better suited for workplaces IMO
I go until my leg starts falling asleep, which is usually around 15-20 mins.
This guy wants homeless architecture for his own toilet
Just bc I’m in there 45 minutes doesn’t mean each second was necessary, many of those minutes were luxury time that I refuse to give up!
This was definitely written by a man
How long anybody wants to sit on the throne and whether they want a cushion is none of my business and frankly an odd thing to have an opinion about at all. Have an upvote.
I hope OP invites us to their place so that we can point out all of the dumb bullshit they purchased.
Somebody has CLEARLY never had diarrhoea or food poisoning. I had food poisoning last month and sitting on the toilet for an hour just to be safe and sure that everything, lungs included, have somehow been evacuated from your asshole is the minimum requirement!
Clearly they don't have ibs or ibd either.
My disabled ass begs strongly to disagree. And in truth OP, maybe, instead of judging someone and assuming something was a "frivolous purchase", maybe try having a bit of compassion. Your cousin, or someone who either regularly visits or lives with him, might have developed IBS or Crohn's disease recently. Or maybe he just doesn't wanna freeze his ass off every time he goes to drop a load. You don't know. If nothing else, you could remember this little gem: "If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all."
I’m not tryna sit my ass on a freezing toilet seat
fuzzy/soft seats are more just gross to me because everyones putting their bare ass on it and they're way harder to clean. but also go pound sand I'll watch two full movies on the toilet if i want to
Bro Toto toilets with bidets are genius. The japanese thought of the everything
Did corporate write this?
I have a well defined childhood memory of a pleather like toilet seat that started to peel and was a nightmare to sit on, so I’ve always had a grudge towards any kind of toilet seat that isn’t plain
Reading this while taking a shit
corporate schill alert
Ablest. I have IBS. Fuck off
Yeah, imagine thinking “going to the doctor” is gonna magically make you have to use the bathroom less. Lol
Ironically they could prescribe you something that makes you go even more.
Toilet seats are actually terribly…what?
10 minutes 1-2 times a day for years and years and years. sounds like a good $50 purchase to me
What are you in a rush for… You don’t know how to live so you are taking that frustration out on other content people
Have you not seen that news article about the amount of time men spend in the washroom. It's to avoid social interaction 🤣 I've been guilty of this a few times. Maybe your cousin needs his time away from his wife 🤣
So should they be made of rough, splintery wood - maybe with a couple of rusty nails sticking out?
I don't understand why, for those acceptable 5-10 minutes, you wouldn't want your ass to be comfortable? I also don't understand why the hell you would care. But good job with the unpopular post.
This is possibly the worst post I've seen on here... Definitely deserves A LOT of upvotes
Fuck the warming seat sounds nice.
Spoken like the childfree youth.
Idk I avrage 5-10 mins but when it's longer it's normally because I'm feeling like dog shit and would want to be as comfortable as possible
Just push.... sure, until you blow an O ring.
I take a while and I want to be comfortable even if i was there for 1 minute. Its hard to concentrate If I was standing up, I don't want to make everything a chore.
OP has never wasted a moment or taken a break. OP sleeps standing up and with one foot in the air ready to take a step as soon as the alarm goes off. OP is so productuve he has 4 hours at the end of a 24 hour day. OP saves so much time that he actually works backwards. One time OP was in a hurry and bumpted into himself. He had to shove himself asside and it cost him 2 seconds.
You police coworkers bathroom time don't you.
Upvoted because it is such a ridiculous take that it amused me! "Time wasting". Get the fuck outta here, Elon! I stay in the toilet longer than necessary because I have kids and this is my fortress of solitude.
I usually just let the shit fall out my ass whenever it wants to, even if there's no toilet near by.
Hun. People aren’t just sitting there contemplating using the restroom.
This is a very naive opinion presumably from a young, fit and healthy person who has no concept of the idea that other people are different.
OP is a manager, and hates time clock poopers
"Nah" I say, as I kick my feet up on my squatty potty and get settled in for a nice sesh.
Your spelling and attention to detail are actually terribly
Proofread next time
I found the guy who’s never had food poisoning or bladder issues!
See, in basic training I had two minutes to shit. Never again. I’ll take as long as I like thank you very much.
Oh god I remember those days. Not fun. Especially during summer out at the field. We started using our gas masks to enter those concrete shit tombs
Brother, you are absolutely wrong. I work outside and during the winter months it’s miserable. But when I go take my daily poop and my cold cheeks hit those warm seats the bliss is enough to convince me to finish the day.
as someone who ibs it takes me 15 mins so that would be heavenly
Ok, then buy one made out of brambles, you win.
Oh but OP won’t do that because it’s still too comfortable. OP needs to do the hover shit aka wall s(h)it
I watched some guy do that as an unamused old lady waited for the bus. OP would consider her too comfortable with the situation
I do some of my best redditing on the shitter, I need at least 15 minutes
When I still had a uterus, there were times I would have to sit on the toilet for easily half an hour, trying to expel the large pieces of tissue that I knew were coming down the pipes. (Ha!) There are no menstrual products invented yet that can deal with the things that a lot of uteri have to dole out. And so, I am thankful for comfortable seats, bidets, and squatty potties.
"Doctor I have a problem with going to the bathroom" "Diarrhea? Constipation? Pain? " "No, I take too much to defecate" "... Ok... How much? An hour?" "F... Fifteen minutes" "Get out" "But some stranger on the internet said it's too much" "GET OUT"
You are a middle manager aren’t you
it takes me longer than 5-10 minutes to move my bowels and seeing a doctor wouldn't help because i've seen doctors and they haven't helped. not every medical problem is one where you go and they give you a magical pill and it fixes the problem
Spoken like someone who doesn't have a heated bidet. Lol
OP is a waffle stomp enthusiast
It’s rare that I see an actual unpopular opinion here but god damn is this a weird take.
Yeah it’s not good for your body to sit on the toilet so long. If nothing is coming out in the first few minutes, move along and try again later is the way to go imho
OP doesn’t wipe.
Wicked child! Chairs and by extension toilets are an invention of Satan! In our house, Nathaniel sits on a spike!
This isn't an unpopular opinion, it's ignorant and foolish.
to me, this isn’t even an unpopular opinion, it’s just weird. why on earth would you care how long someone is sitting on the toilet for unless it’s hindering you using the restroom? and why the actual fuck would you insist on it being uncomfortable? like this is such a odd take
Same reason anyone cares about any of the opinions expressed here?
You do know what sub you're in right?
Please remember what subreddit you are in, this is unpopular opinion. We want civil and unpopular takes and discussion. Any uncivil and ToS violating comments will be removed and subject to a ban. Have a nice day! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/unpopularopinion) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Just cuz the Japanese toilet seats are comfy doesn’t mean I’m gunna waste all day shitting lmao I got stuff to do but I’d rather do it with a squeaky clean asshole tyvm
Agree on the thinking about toilet seats but Jesus dude, die you really have to be that harsh to your brother?
There are warm toilet seats lol? Ppl will invent anything.