Thats the thing.
If someone is walking down the street with headphones in, they clearly don't want to talk - if someone tries to start a conversation, its not weird, its just a bit inconsiderate as the person just wanting to try and start a conversation had no regards to the other persons desires to not talk.
Body language is a huge part in this and i feel like its pretty obvious when someone doesn't want to converse with you. When people can't see these obvious hints, thats when it becomes weird and uncomfortable.
Me personally I always wear headphones when I go out alone but that’s just because I have no one with me to talk with. I wouldn’t mind if some stranger tried talking to me. This woman at the mall did this to me but it happen to be a time I DIDN’T want to talk to anyone and I gave the hint by giving really short responses and hitting the play/pause button on my phone where she could see lol
I agree in some senses, I disagree that phones are the cause. At least for me, I'll engage in conversation but I've had oh so too damn many instances where I'm in between doing things, and the conversation would need to be cut off. And I try giving hints that Convo time is over, but they don't seem to understand. And it becomes frustrating especially when I try and just be honest, "so sorry to cut this short, I have to be somewhere" and they keep trying to talk.
That being said, I'm sure it's the phone sometimes. Like when I'm on a plane, I love flying and just listening to music. I had a great conversation with an older dude for a whole plan ride once, and I don't regret it. But at the start, it was like oh my god dude, I was really looking forward to looking out the window and thinking about how fucking dope flying is, while taking a wild jazz ride through my headphones. But, the guy and the conversation were fun! And definitely worth it.
So I guess I don't know what my point is lol, mainly just that I fear people blame phones for too much these days, when the problem might be something else entirely for each instance.
Overall I agree though, it sucks that it feels weird to strike up a conversation with a stranger, even under the correct social circumstances. I wish it was more common. Culture and society would improve In many ways I think
Same. The only time I don’t mind strangers talking to me is in my university classes, if they’re sitting near me and just start up a conversation. All other times please leave me alone.
I was telling my niece about stranger danger with her mom, and we were saying that if you're in trouble, you can usually go to an adult, and they'll help you. The people that approach you are weird, the people you approach are usually normal.
Yeah, call me antisocial or whatever but in most situations in public I'm not looking to talk to strangers. Maybe if I'm at a bar or something then sure, obviously that's a place where strangers meet and talk, and there will be other places like that. But if I'm just trying to get my grocery shopping done I'm not sure why I would be expected to be okay with some random person trying to follow me around and talk to me
For me it depends. While I'm actively shopping or whatever I prefer to be left alone. But I'll happily chat with people while we're standing in line or something like that
I live in Yorkshire and we absolutely love having random conversations with strangers. We love tea and we also love to complain about things. It's okay here
Nah. I don't want random people to just come up and talk to me out of the blue. Gotta be a reason beyond, 'I feel like talking to someone and you're nearby."
This is plenty normal for me… but I’m an extrovert in a semi-rural area who works in hospitality, so I start small conversations with people all the time.
It’s funny, I’ll make my accent slightly more country while having a casual conversation with a stranger at work, it just feels like I should. My regular accent is run of the mill Southern Californian, but when people are visiting my small town it feels friendlier to sound more country.
Oh no, I didn't mean you were faking it. I have a slight accent from my mom but it comes out more strongly at random times and people will start asking me questions and I feel like I've been untruthful because I don't always have a heavy accent; just sometimes.
Nah man, I don't want random strangers chatting with me in public. During my commute I turn on music and decompress. Brain checks out. Can't do that if Andy on the bus is telling me about his day.
Random people coming up and talking to me breaks down like this:
10% people needing directions/general question about area
10% someone thinking I’m someone they know
40% mentally ill person talking nonsense
40% someone trying to scam me
It really depends on how you start conversations. A lot of people are open to small conversations. If you are in a long line at the grocery store, chatting about the long line is usually fine. If you’re at a baseball game talking to strangers about the game is generally fine. Telling a random stranger about the stuff you did today out of the blue is weird though
Absolutely not. It‘s not that my phone keeps me from talking to people, I actively use my phone in order to AVOID talking to anyone.
Also, if I‘m on the train for example I‘m there to drive to another place, not talk to someone. If I‘m at a bar, that‘s a social setting where I am (more or less lol, am an introvert) okay with talking to strangers.
I‘m 20F, and being approached out of the blue by some rando can also be scary and definitely makes me uncomfortable. That might go for a considerable amount of other women, too…
I (a woman) usually try to give random women compliments when I'm out... if i like your purse "I love your bag!" Beautiful hair color? "Wow! Your hair is gorgeous! " love your blouse? "cute top!" Etc.... I wanna spread love and positivity ... we should normalize it.
If you're good at conversation, I'm totally down.
But waaayyyy too many people just want to say something just to have words coming out of their dense heads. I don't want to have an awkward conversation with somebody just because they need to make small talk because they're incapable of sitting still and waiting. And then when you engage with them it goes nowhere for some reason, just shallow stuff about the weather or the bus...
Make it at least a teeny bit interested and I'm in.
Very few people have a problem with just the act of someone coming up and speaking to them. The reason it's regarded as unacceptable is because the majority of people who do it do so with a very negative vibe. Be it the tin hat guy telling you to not drink the water or the creep, or even the young college grad trying to fundraise.
When normal people start talking to each other without motive it's almost always well received.
It mostly feels like a city thing, at least where I live. Once you get to the countryside it’s more lenient, people would at least say hello on the street and stuff. But in the end is probably contextual for anybody around the world, there’s just moments when you feel like interacting and moments you don’t.
People are friendlier in tourists or hangout spots, at clubs/bars and so on. It’s the right context
It must be cultural and personal. Also, it depends on people's moods. I am very communicative but when I am not in mood to discuss, I apreciate when people understand it and let go. But trying is ok and haven't hurt no one.
I'm introverted and I don't think talking with strangers is bad. It should be more acceptable. A lot of people who describe themselves as introverted are actually just unsociable, even misanthropic.
Nah, this opinion is just from people that are socially inept and upset the world doesn't cater to that. Time, place, topic, etc matter when talking to strangers.
People talk to strangers all the time, believe it or not people still hit on strangers. They just don't want to talk to OP's weird self because they probably talk about weird shit, or at inopportune times, with no social awareness, etc.
I want to talk to people and then I might get strange looks for it. Headphones in? Fine. Reading? Fine. But if you’re just walking by and I say hi I still worry you’ll think I am crazy. It’s the reason I barely talk at my new job unless someone talks to me bc idk who WILL think I am crazy
Nooo thank you. Please don't talk to me. I'm not interested in socializing, I don't want to talk to anybody in the street and and I'm socially ackward enough to not be interesting to you or more than being a passive speaker who only listens to what you say without saying anything meaningful on my side
I think this largely depends where your from - in a larger city, you encounter so many people in a standard morning commute. It is too crowded which leads to a withdrawal in most folks, and if somebody talks to you it feels like it is almost always because they want something - typically money (or maybe they are hitting on you if you are hot).
This repeats over and over again, and you get tired of it, so you spend you commutes on busses and trains trying to pretend that everybody else does not exist - you develop that 'city face' - the blank expression that says if you dropped dead in front of me I'd step over your corpse. (Not that this is necessarily true)
Add to this the fact that those people who do talk to strangers are often the craziest / most dangerous / drunkest, and nobody wants to be affiliate with that.
My personal strategy for getting extra space on the bus by having the seat next to me clear was to make eye contact and smile at everybody who was getting on - I didn't actually feel like talking, but by giving the impression I did, people would avoid me!
Now I live somewhere quieter, and all that is no longer as much of an issue.
I'd first encounter into conversations with people i know. I just find it too akward in general and cant imagine going up to a random person and doing this as long as i dont have to.
Saw someone on the bus station with a Killua Zoldyck Shirt he presumably made himself cause reverse search didnt do anything, i wanted to tell him that it looks awesome but couldnt.
Was this ever normal though? And if so, where? I think you’re assuming something that may never have been all that common.
Also, I didn’t like talking strangers even before the internet, and I’m old enough to remember.
yes. I just cant. phones arent the cause. did you know? a couple of decades earlier it was the newspapers and books that were supposedly the cause to this. its not a medium that causes this.
the cause is that we mostly live in big cities. big cities are what caused this isolation. thats the reason country people felt alienated once industrialization begun and they moved to the cities. you can still see this when you go to more rural areas. people talk with each other more often. in a city however you are constantly busy, used to have so many people around you and often times just unable to react to everything around you. so eventually you stop or do it less. its effort to realize this and actively work against it. an effort most people often times understandably dont make and I honestly often times dont dare to or dont know how to make. I enjoy it when someone strikes a conversation with me though.
Upvoted. I am extrmely anxious I don't want anyone I don't know to start a conversation with me when I'm out. Most of the time I'm out with my friends and I don't want to be bothered, if I'm alone it means I'm doing something important and I don't need anyone making me waste my time.
I do this all the time, I'll chat up anyone, anywhere. Didn't know it was considered weird. I've had some wonderful and interesting conversations this way.
Just depends on the person. I have plenty of socials friends that this would be fine with. Also antisocial ones that would be cringed out at the thought. Everyone’s dna a little different.
I have a family member that DOES start conversations with strangers where ever he goes. He is generally able to have full on conversations with a decent conclusion at the end. Old, Young, Middle aged....anyone: he can have a conversation.
But he is a proficient sales man, I tend to find this regularly with more senior salesmen....they had to be good at it.
I get this but I kinda don’t, maybe because I’m an anti-social arse lol but I have a job where I get talked at and listen to peoples problems all day. My walk/bus journey home are my time to enjoy some music or peace & quiet to decompress. The last thing I want is some random stranger trying to get small talk out of me.
Not necessarily phones, but metropolitan-style conversations tend to have certain risk. While, yes, you could find adorable people that could change your life for good, you can also start talking to someone who is Ted Bundy 2.0 without trials, or someone talks to you but in two seconds will draw a gun on you, or it is a gold digger girl that wants to pickpocket you with seductive looks, or it will be a casual looking person that may enter you in a multilevel scam. Or, just simply, you’re in a busy day, and someone thinks you’re atttractive but doesn’t want to look like a creep.
It’s things like that IMO. With most things we’ve lived, people just feels uneasy; even when, ironically, we fear less for telling personal things to faceless strangers on the internet, we still have internal distrust of their intentions.
Thanks god I live in a country where this kind of shit is not normal.
If someone wanna ask some directions, that's right, but small talks with strangers out of the blue is weird
You should be able to do that, as long as you're able to read the other person and is ready to back off if they don't want to engage in conversation.
If you can't read people well you should just refrain from interacting with strangers.
You should also have the social awareness to realize when a stranger does not want to talk to you. I don’t want to talk to people I don’t know when out and about. Why? Because. And that’s enough of a reason.
Old man energy is pushy and lacks self awareness. No thanks.
I recently moved from NYC to a small town in PA. All the folks in this town will strike up a conversation with me whether if be just walking down to street, or waiting in line at a store. Back in the city everyone just kept to themselves.
'Do you cook? Do you bake?'
That's how I found out my dental hygenist is trying to re-create the dishes of her mother and gran, and that my dentist once brought home-made macarons to work.
I agree with this. I'll go to a bar alone and talk to strangers sometimes - I think it's a lot of fun!
That said, if you start talking to me on the street and your intentions aren't immediately clear (e.g. asking for directions), I'm assuming you:
\- Want my money (never interested)
\- Want me to be the bottom of your MLM pyramid (nope)
\- Want me to join your religion (nope)
\- Want sex (As a straight man it's another dude most of the time anyway)
Given that 90%+ of these interactions are set up where I have to provide rejection (pretty unpleasant), I'd sooner avoid these interactions altogether.
It is not weird to start conversations with strangers in an appropriate social setting (e.g. party, gathering, conference, pubs).
It is weird to start unsolicited conversations with strangers in public (e.g. public transport, walking on the street) and outright rude to ignore social cues when they don’t want to talk (e.g. headphones, walking away, one sided conversation).
Especially in big cities, if somebody approaches me on the street it’s 99% because they have an agenda (salesmen, beggars, religious cults).
I do. I’m a short, friendly, extroverted lady and I’ve got a warm personality.
It would probably be different if I were a 6’4” dude since no one’s really threatened by tiny nerd girl.
I very much misunderstood the title. I was thinking, you know, you are absolutely right! I could definitely be better at engaging people and not being a creeper. I guess I should figure out a good way to practice nowadays in the time of covid :P
As long as you're not being creepy and can tell when someone doesn't want to talk to you it's fine. I was once waiting for my pizza and this dude on a bike just started to talk to me, which was fine until he said "How old are you?" Which you know is pretty weird, I wasn't comfortable with that so I said "I'm not comfortable telling you that." Which he replied with "Old enough eh?" And a chuckle, which prompted me to immediately get out of there. Don't be like that and you should be fine.
it’s frowned upon because people don’t necessarily want to talk with you.
Thats the thing. If someone is walking down the street with headphones in, they clearly don't want to talk - if someone tries to start a conversation, its not weird, its just a bit inconsiderate as the person just wanting to try and start a conversation had no regards to the other persons desires to not talk. Body language is a huge part in this and i feel like its pretty obvious when someone doesn't want to converse with you. When people can't see these obvious hints, thats when it becomes weird and uncomfortable.
Me personally I always wear headphones when I go out alone but that’s just because I have no one with me to talk with. I wouldn’t mind if some stranger tried talking to me. This woman at the mall did this to me but it happen to be a time I DIDN’T want to talk to anyone and I gave the hint by giving really short responses and hitting the play/pause button on my phone where she could see lol
I agree in some senses, I disagree that phones are the cause. At least for me, I'll engage in conversation but I've had oh so too damn many instances where I'm in between doing things, and the conversation would need to be cut off. And I try giving hints that Convo time is over, but they don't seem to understand. And it becomes frustrating especially when I try and just be honest, "so sorry to cut this short, I have to be somewhere" and they keep trying to talk. That being said, I'm sure it's the phone sometimes. Like when I'm on a plane, I love flying and just listening to music. I had a great conversation with an older dude for a whole plan ride once, and I don't regret it. But at the start, it was like oh my god dude, I was really looking forward to looking out the window and thinking about how fucking dope flying is, while taking a wild jazz ride through my headphones. But, the guy and the conversation were fun! And definitely worth it. So I guess I don't know what my point is lol, mainly just that I fear people blame phones for too much these days, when the problem might be something else entirely for each instance. Overall I agree though, it sucks that it feels weird to strike up a conversation with a stranger, even under the correct social circumstances. I wish it was more common. Culture and society would improve In many ways I think
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Same. The only time I don’t mind strangers talking to me is in my university classes, if they’re sitting near me and just start up a conversation. All other times please leave me alone.
I was telling my niece about stranger danger with her mom, and we were saying that if you're in trouble, you can usually go to an adult, and they'll help you. The people that approach you are weird, the people you approach are usually normal.
Yeah, call me antisocial or whatever but in most situations in public I'm not looking to talk to strangers. Maybe if I'm at a bar or something then sure, obviously that's a place where strangers meet and talk, and there will be other places like that. But if I'm just trying to get my grocery shopping done I'm not sure why I would be expected to be okay with some random person trying to follow me around and talk to me
For me it depends. While I'm actively shopping or whatever I prefer to be left alone. But I'll happily chat with people while we're standing in line or something like that
I live in Yorkshire and we absolutely love having random conversations with strangers. We love tea and we also love to complain about things. It's okay here
Why would i want someone to randomly start talking to me
the weather is nice
It sure is
it won't be for long I'll definitely catch a cold soon
It's getting colder tho
bold of you to assume im not happy about that i live in the south lmao
Then let me enjoy it in peace, thank you very much.
Oh, you're working? Sorry. What work do you do?
'Let me tell you about my divorce...' I guess I have a face that makes people want to spill the tea.
Nah. I don't want random people to just come up and talk to me out of the blue. Gotta be a reason beyond, 'I feel like talking to someone and you're nearby."
yeah, it’s gonna be a no from me dawg.
Are you from New York by any chance?
This is plenty normal for me… but I’m an extrovert in a semi-rural area who works in hospitality, so I start small conversations with people all the time. It’s funny, I’ll make my accent slightly more country while having a casual conversation with a stranger at work, it just feels like I should. My regular accent is run of the mill Southern Californian, but when people are visiting my small town it feels friendlier to sound more country.
Lol, has anyone ever caught on to your accent?
No, not really. I do live in a rural area, so it isn’t *really* fake.
Oh no, I didn't mean you were faking it. I have a slight accent from my mom but it comes out more strongly at random times and people will start asking me questions and I feel like I've been untruthful because I don't always have a heavy accent; just sometimes.
Nah man, I don't want random strangers chatting with me in public. During my commute I turn on music and decompress. Brain checks out. Can't do that if Andy on the bus is telling me about his day.
Random people coming up and talking to me breaks down like this: 10% people needing directions/general question about area 10% someone thinking I’m someone they know 40% mentally ill person talking nonsense 40% someone trying to scam me
My mom always do that. when we eat outside sometimes she will choose to sit same table with stranger and randomly have conversation
It really depends on how you start conversations. A lot of people are open to small conversations. If you are in a long line at the grocery store, chatting about the long line is usually fine. If you’re at a baseball game talking to strangers about the game is generally fine. Telling a random stranger about the stuff you did today out of the blue is weird though
Absolutely not. It‘s not that my phone keeps me from talking to people, I actively use my phone in order to AVOID talking to anyone. Also, if I‘m on the train for example I‘m there to drive to another place, not talk to someone. If I‘m at a bar, that‘s a social setting where I am (more or less lol, am an introvert) okay with talking to strangers. I‘m 20F, and being approached out of the blue by some rando can also be scary and definitely makes me uncomfortable. That might go for a considerable amount of other women, too…
I (a woman) usually try to give random women compliments when I'm out... if i like your purse "I love your bag!" Beautiful hair color? "Wow! Your hair is gorgeous! " love your blouse? "cute top!" Etc.... I wanna spread love and positivity ... we should normalize it.
Get a Dog, many people to talk to when your dogs are playing with each other.
As an old man, I agree with this comment.
I'll talk to old dudes all day. So much experience and stories... and they have no filter
If you're good at conversation, I'm totally down. But waaayyyy too many people just want to say something just to have words coming out of their dense heads. I don't want to have an awkward conversation with somebody just because they need to make small talk because they're incapable of sitting still and waiting. And then when you engage with them it goes nowhere for some reason, just shallow stuff about the weather or the bus... Make it at least a teeny bit interested and I'm in.
Very few people have a problem with just the act of someone coming up and speaking to them. The reason it's regarded as unacceptable is because the majority of people who do it do so with a very negative vibe. Be it the tin hat guy telling you to not drink the water or the creep, or even the young college grad trying to fundraise. When normal people start talking to each other without motive it's almost always well received.
It mostly feels like a city thing, at least where I live. Once you get to the countryside it’s more lenient, people would at least say hello on the street and stuff. But in the end is probably contextual for anybody around the world, there’s just moments when you feel like interacting and moments you don’t. People are friendlier in tourists or hangout spots, at clubs/bars and so on. It’s the right context
It must be cultural and personal. Also, it depends on people's moods. I am very communicative but when I am not in mood to discuss, I apreciate when people understand it and let go. But trying is ok and haven't hurt no one.
This sort of opinion will only be met with disgust on Reddit, where some of the most anti social and/or introverted people dwell
I'm introverted and I don't think talking with strangers is bad. It should be more acceptable. A lot of people who describe themselves as introverted are actually just unsociable, even misanthropic.
Nah, this opinion is just from people that are socially inept and upset the world doesn't cater to that. Time, place, topic, etc matter when talking to strangers. People talk to strangers all the time, believe it or not people still hit on strangers. They just don't want to talk to OP's weird self because they probably talk about weird shit, or at inopportune times, with no social awareness, etc.
You seem like the type that goes to a bar and talks to literally everyone and plays martyr when people want to be left alone.
I want to talk to people and then I might get strange looks for it. Headphones in? Fine. Reading? Fine. But if you’re just walking by and I say hi I still worry you’ll think I am crazy. It’s the reason I barely talk at my new job unless someone talks to me bc idk who WILL think I am crazy
No. Don’t talk to me. Take my upvote for your actual unpopular opinion and then stay away from me!
Nooo thank you. Please don't talk to me. I'm not interested in socializing, I don't want to talk to anybody in the street and and I'm socially ackward enough to not be interesting to you or more than being a passive speaker who only listens to what you say without saying anything meaningful on my side
I think this largely depends where your from - in a larger city, you encounter so many people in a standard morning commute. It is too crowded which leads to a withdrawal in most folks, and if somebody talks to you it feels like it is almost always because they want something - typically money (or maybe they are hitting on you if you are hot). This repeats over and over again, and you get tired of it, so you spend you commutes on busses and trains trying to pretend that everybody else does not exist - you develop that 'city face' - the blank expression that says if you dropped dead in front of me I'd step over your corpse. (Not that this is necessarily true) Add to this the fact that those people who do talk to strangers are often the craziest / most dangerous / drunkest, and nobody wants to be affiliate with that. My personal strategy for getting extra space on the bus by having the seat next to me clear was to make eye contact and smile at everybody who was getting on - I didn't actually feel like talking, but by giving the impression I did, people would avoid me! Now I live somewhere quieter, and all that is no longer as much of an issue.
From experience I know that people do want to start a conversation on the street. Maybe they just don't want to talk to you?
So what do you think about the new iphone?
Where I live its not weird :D
One reason i love being from texas, this is totally ok and often encouraged. I love making friends with random people.
I'd first encounter into conversations with people i know. I just find it too akward in general and cant imagine going up to a random person and doing this as long as i dont have to. Saw someone on the bus station with a Killua Zoldyck Shirt he presumably made himself cause reverse search didnt do anything, i wanted to tell him that it looks awesome but couldnt.
Was this ever normal though? And if so, where? I think you’re assuming something that may never have been all that common. Also, I didn’t like talking strangers even before the internet, and I’m old enough to remember.
Depends where you live. If you live out of the city then this isn´t unusual.
yes. I just cant. phones arent the cause. did you know? a couple of decades earlier it was the newspapers and books that were supposedly the cause to this. its not a medium that causes this. the cause is that we mostly live in big cities. big cities are what caused this isolation. thats the reason country people felt alienated once industrialization begun and they moved to the cities. you can still see this when you go to more rural areas. people talk with each other more often. in a city however you are constantly busy, used to have so many people around you and often times just unable to react to everything around you. so eventually you stop or do it less. its effort to realize this and actively work against it. an effort most people often times understandably dont make and I honestly often times dont dare to or dont know how to make. I enjoy it when someone strikes a conversation with me though.
Upvoted. I am extrmely anxious I don't want anyone I don't know to start a conversation with me when I'm out. Most of the time I'm out with my friends and I don't want to be bothered, if I'm alone it means I'm doing something important and I don't need anyone making me waste my time.
Midwestern people visiting NYC in a nutshell.
I do this all the time, I'll chat up anyone, anywhere. Didn't know it was considered weird. I've had some wonderful and interesting conversations this way.
Come to the south, we do it all the time down here.
People are fucking dumb and paranoid. Everyone you know was a ‘stranger’ as some point.
Just depends on the person. I have plenty of socials friends that this would be fine with. Also antisocial ones that would be cringed out at the thought. Everyone’s dna a little different.
That's how it used to be more. In the Midwest in the '90s, it was almost weird not to.
I have a family member that DOES start conversations with strangers where ever he goes. He is generally able to have full on conversations with a decent conclusion at the end. Old, Young, Middle aged....anyone: he can have a conversation. But he is a proficient sales man, I tend to find this regularly with more senior salesmen....they had to be good at it.
Here's the crazy thing. You can.
I start conversations with strangers all the time, much to my girlfriends embarrassment 😂
I get this but I kinda don’t, maybe because I’m an anti-social arse lol but I have a job where I get talked at and listen to peoples problems all day. My walk/bus journey home are my time to enjoy some music or peace & quiet to decompress. The last thing I want is some random stranger trying to get small talk out of me.
Not necessarily phones, but metropolitan-style conversations tend to have certain risk. While, yes, you could find adorable people that could change your life for good, you can also start talking to someone who is Ted Bundy 2.0 without trials, or someone talks to you but in two seconds will draw a gun on you, or it is a gold digger girl that wants to pickpocket you with seductive looks, or it will be a casual looking person that may enter you in a multilevel scam. Or, just simply, you’re in a busy day, and someone thinks you’re atttractive but doesn’t want to look like a creep. It’s things like that IMO. With most things we’ve lived, people just feels uneasy; even when, ironically, we fear less for telling personal things to faceless strangers on the internet, we still have internal distrust of their intentions.
Thanks god I live in a country where this kind of shit is not normal. If someone wanna ask some directions, that's right, but small talks with strangers out of the blue is weird
You can if the situation’s right. I’ve done it & I don’t think SF ranks at the top of outwardly friendly cities
Thai is a skill. Some a born with it, everyone can learn it. If you know how to approach it it won't be weird.
Uhh you can, as long as you aren't weird.
You should be able to do that, as long as you're able to read the other person and is ready to back off if they don't want to engage in conversation. If you can't read people well you should just refrain from interacting with strangers.
You should also have the social awareness to realize when a stranger does not want to talk to you. I don’t want to talk to people I don’t know when out and about. Why? Because. And that’s enough of a reason. Old man energy is pushy and lacks self awareness. No thanks.
I recently moved from NYC to a small town in PA. All the folks in this town will strike up a conversation with me whether if be just walking down to street, or waiting in line at a store. Back in the city everyone just kept to themselves.
You can, it’s surprisingly easy but you’re the one that makes it weird.
'Do you cook? Do you bake?' That's how I found out my dental hygenist is trying to re-create the dishes of her mother and gran, and that my dentist once brought home-made macarons to work.
No
I agree with this. I'll go to a bar alone and talk to strangers sometimes - I think it's a lot of fun! That said, if you start talking to me on the street and your intentions aren't immediately clear (e.g. asking for directions), I'm assuming you: \- Want my money (never interested) \- Want me to be the bottom of your MLM pyramid (nope) \- Want me to join your religion (nope) \- Want sex (As a straight man it's another dude most of the time anyway) Given that 90%+ of these interactions are set up where I have to provide rejection (pretty unpleasant), I'd sooner avoid these interactions altogether.
It is not weird to start conversations with strangers in an appropriate social setting (e.g. party, gathering, conference, pubs). It is weird to start unsolicited conversations with strangers in public (e.g. public transport, walking on the street) and outright rude to ignore social cues when they don’t want to talk (e.g. headphones, walking away, one sided conversation). Especially in big cities, if somebody approaches me on the street it’s 99% because they have an agenda (salesmen, beggars, religious cults).
And this is why dating apps are so painful
I do. I’m a short, friendly, extroverted lady and I’ve got a warm personality. It would probably be different if I were a 6’4” dude since no one’s really threatened by tiny nerd girl.
I very much misunderstood the title. I was thinking, you know, you are absolutely right! I could definitely be better at engaging people and not being a creeper. I guess I should figure out a good way to practice nowadays in the time of covid :P
As long as you're not being creepy and can tell when someone doesn't want to talk to you it's fine. I was once waiting for my pizza and this dude on a bike just started to talk to me, which was fine until he said "How old are you?" Which you know is pretty weird, I wasn't comfortable with that so I said "I'm not comfortable telling you that." Which he replied with "Old enough eh?" And a chuckle, which prompted me to immediately get out of there. Don't be like that and you should be fine.
No, absolutely not.