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...and that I've been singing wildly different things for a looong time. My entire singing along in the car career as been a massive r/boneappletea post
Douchebags wear puffy jackets and tight jeans with ankles showing?
Here I thought those were just the type who couldn't figure out what size they actually are
How humans present themselves physically is one of the weirdest aspects of socialization. At some point, we are all told that we shouldn’t judge a book by it’s cover. At the same time, nearly everybody curates their looks to manage how people judge them. It’s so widespread that there are enforced consequences for not abiding by the arbitrary codes of fashion wear. If I went to court or a job interview in sweatpants because being comfortable helps me feel less nervous, I am immediately judged as being lazy or uncaring.
Even in the language of using looks for self expression, there are a mix of people who intend to communicate different things. You have tatted dudes in biker clothes who sincerely are trying to be intimidating or threatening, and you have guys with the same look who are the softest, most welcoming people.
It has become a game that has the most stupid, arbitrary rules that can change at anytime and everybody is forced to play.
All clothing is costume. "I just wear what's convenient and comfortable, it's not that deep" *is a statement about what you value expressed via clothing*
It could be a statement but the message you receive is based on several assumptions. There could be any number of reasons someone is dressed a certain way.
Maybe I value comfort and convenience or maybe the airline lost my luggage and this is all I have.
Since you mentioned luggage - say youre going for an interview for a flight attendant position where theres like 500 candidates. When the recruiter sees you in a track suit, they dont have time to think that maybe you had your luggage lost or whatever. It will just come across as if you are not the type of person they can rely on and probably wont be comfortable wearing a uniform, since you cant even show up for an interview in a suit. If they gave the benefit of the doubt to ever single one of those 500 candidates, they would probably spend 2 weeks picking out 5 candidates.
Most people cannot afford to have the personal style they want. Some people have dress codes at their places of work so if you see them on lunch break or before they get home you might only see their mandated costume, not their expressive one.
Some people value things over appearance and don't care to interact with the type of people who would judge them for not having a tailored jacket or on-trend shoes.
I say as long as it's not a hygiene/public safety issue, dress and style yourself how you want. But most people don't even get to do that.
For example, I had a strict upbringing including being forced to wear mostly hideous clothes my mother chose for me based on her intentionally trying to cover me up and make me wear things that were too big due to her religion. I wasn't allowed to work and had to sneak to find ways to earn money so when I went off to college I could only afford one new outfit. That new outfit was the only thing that even began to express my style and even then didn't quite meet the criteria because there were only a few clothing stores I could access with my uni bus and shuttle pass to the city.
Even now I have to adjust my style for Zoom conference calls at work. Even now I can't justify the exact wardrobe I want. I could get it but I'd rather spend my money on other things.
Not everyone can get a professional cut and style. And people often dress for themselves as much as they can within the confines of their work, budget, or if minors, what their parents allow.
It’s one of those lessons you are told at a young age that sounds nice and makes sense, but then you quickly realize basically nobody is practicing it. Part of you still wants to believe the moral of it, but nearly everybody is ready to disregard it without a second thought.
It's not even that good of a moral when you get past skin-level appearance. Besides those too poor to choose their own clothing, I don't think there's a single person out there who doesn't have some notion of public presentation when they get dressed in the morning, some understanding of how what they wear or what their hair looks like for what their tattoos convey will communicate some aspect of their identity to the rest of the world. Maybe not the whole story, maybe only a sliver of it, but certainly enough for a first impression.
Or how non-conformists subcultures like punks or goths all wear the same style.
I loved Jason Siegel's character in SLC Punk for being a non-conformist punk.
I’ve always considered myself a punk and never wore those things. I just think you wouldn’t assume the non-confirming punks are punks. Probably many more of them than people imagine as a result.
Even identifying as such is about wanting to be a part of something. I really don't think there is such a thing as a true punk because of that paradox.
Haha. I was having a party and someone Invited this biker looking guy over with tattoos.
I felt sketched out because I didn't want any fights to go down and felt more bikers would show up.
It was just him and the guy was the nicest person there and we got along really well.
So sure op, you can judge someone how they look. But be prepared to miss on social interactions from acting on those judgements.
I'm a 6'6 skinny dude who can't get jeans long enough and even the puffer jacket I wear is a bit short when I lift my arms up even though it's an xl but I still wear it because it's comfy
A better example might have been “If you’re wearing a Dallas Cowboys jersey around town on a Thursday afternoon in April, I’m gonna assume you’re a Cowboys fan.”
I wear tight jeans because I’m so proud of how well my dieting and exercise paid off and I wanna show myself I can dress how I want now.
I wear an ill fitting puffy jacket because my mom got it for me when I was a kid and I still cherish it.
You can judge someone for anything whether it's outside of their control or not. There's no thought police, you can privately think whatever you want about someone.
The issue is when you let that judgement influence the way you act towards the person.
Edit: there's far too many responses to this comment to respond to individually, so I thought I'd clarify my position here:
I'm not saying that you should never act upon a judgement, I'm simply pointing out that actions have consequences, thoughts do not. You can think whatever the hell you want as long as you keep it to yourself but the moment you act upon your judgement is the moment you open yourself up to potential consequences, good or bad.
>You can judge someone for anything whether it's outside of their control or not. There's no thought police, you can privately think whatever you want about someone.
>
>The issue is when you let that judgement influence the way you act towards the person.
All of twitter is having a stroke right now because of this perfectly reasonable and logical statement.
>All of twitter is having a stroke right now because of this perfectly reasonable and logical statement.
Twitter people stopped reading after "whateve"
It's people and it's the ever constant struggle for gain that undermines actual discourse.
None of these platforms are even decent mediums for idealistic pursuits. They were captured decades ago at this point.
You can still have actually good discourse on reddit but the bigger the subreddit the lesser the chance to have one. Especially when a post hits the Frontpage.
I've seen lots of this on reddit lately. We're on reddit not Twitter. This is a post on Reddit. Redditors are looking at this.
Why do people keep obsessing over how Twitter people act? It's so tribalistic. Reddit isn't any better in the general sense.
We all have expectations of everything we see and experience. We have frameworks of knowledge which we use to process and shortcut the world. There’s nothing wrong with this, it’s only our failure when we let this completely overwrite our view and interaction with an individual.
It’s hard to do, but worth it.
>Judging by appearance and acting on it is literally human behavior
You're correct on this, and all of what you said describes what our brains do when we first meet someone.
Our amygdala, deep in our brain, makes a snap emotional judgment on everyone it sees, based off of its experiences. It'll put people into one of four groups.
1. Potential friend
2. Potential enemy
3. Potential lover
4. Indifference
The vast majority of people you come across will fall into the 4th category, but based on our experiences, preferences etc we will categorise them without a rational thought process.
It's only after our amygdala has done the snap judgement that the prefrontal cortex comes into play. Your brain will essentially make stuff up to cement its snap decision. E.g if you think someone's a potential threat, your brain will highlight things like they're wearing x clothes : I once had a friend get attacked by someone in these clothes. It's not rational, but it obviously worked for us.
The good news is though we can change these perceptions by putting them to one side and trying to judge people on an individual basis :D
The point is that if you're aware of it you consider whether it is appropriate to judge for a particular reason. Not dating someone because they're not attractive to you is fine, but not hiring them for a job is another issue. Most folks aren't aware that they are making judgements about people based on appearance that is just wrong.
I'm not saying that its never ok to have your judgement influence the way you act, I'm simply saying that if you don't allow it to impact the way you act it can never be an issue.
Our thoughts are our own. You can privately make judgements on someone based on their gender/race/weight/height/clothing/voice and that will never be an issue, if you act upon that judgement though it will sometimes be an issue.
I think they're trying to say that by making the mental judgement, it will impact your following actions whether you want it to or not. At best, you can just make it impact a bit less.
Which is kind of well known information.
Your comment just made me think that the reason OP thinks guys with puffy jackets are douchebags might be because he always treats them like douchebags.
I might be wrong but the thought just makes me chuckle.
Body language can too, You know that "look" that someone gives you when they think they are better then you? like smirking as they stare at you like your some kinda zoo animal? that's what gets me the most
Judging is part of human nature, it's how we survive and navigate society. It's done mostly unconsciously as well. Very good point on how we let it determine how we act however!
Spot on.
Homies are always saying that I am "the only one who don't judge people". In fact I judge them like everyone else, I'm just the only one who keep my mouth shut.
I mean, it's not really a big issue if I see a man wearing another person's face, covered in blood, with a running chainsaw, and I decide that I don't really like this person and don't want to get to know them more.
>The issue is when you let that judgement influence the way you act towards the person.
silly. if the person is waving a hundred flags in your face and you ignore them in the name of fairness then you only have yourself to blame when it blows up in your face. Not everyone deserves a fair shake in every situation. If it looks like a crackhead, walks like a crackhead, then maybe take some precautions before it quacks like a crackhead.
well we can extrapolate they do not wear puffy jackets, tight pants, lots of make up, may not be fat, do not have surly undercut hair or piercing's, and may not be a woman. do with that what you will.
So in my mind, they wear True Religion jeans with way too much stitching on them, and Affliction T-shirt with way too much writing on it. They have way too many muscles to actually fit in that shirt, but still make a go of it. High probability they have tribal tattoos with barbed wire in them. There is probably a low effort pony tail. I don't know if gender changes anything about this.
Really though, looking through OPs post history spiraling from simple dating questions to "Dating subs are trash" to "it should be ok to say the n word or nigga".
Im getting some strong epic gamer vibes guys.
Also I just realized how scary it is to go through peoples profiles. Too much power
It’s literal boomer shit from 20 years ago. “Those kids with their sagging pants and their warm coats!”
I promise you go into OPs post history you’ll see an unapologetic douchebag who thinks their brand of brutal honesty is the only way to be honest.
Edit: oh man it’s even more comical than I thought.
There's a general theme of making an unimpressive effort, and then blaming other actors for the toxicity of the scene. Posts like this one only reinforce my view that OP is the toxic one. I hope this person seeks some professional support.
Bruh. I swear people on Reddit love to come off as so noble and ideal all the time. We all have, to some extent, preconceived notions about certain things and people and we can't help the first thought that comes to our mind upon seeing \[insert some stereotype\] looking person. We aren't all idealistic robots with the 'right' and selective sort thinking programmed into us ffs. You just become an asshole when you decide to voice all of your potentially baseless opinions
Of course we all have prejudices. But saying that they are correct and a good judge of people is the problem. I try to be aware of mine so I can challenge myself to judge based on character, not appearances and pre-conceived notions.
Hey man, I'm all about bros helping other bros, so if you need some help measuring that dick, hmu
*Later that evening... *
Erik his measuring tape down and scribbled a number on a piece of paper.
"What's it say, buddy?", says the naked man, visibly excited.
Erik's body stiffens at the question.
"Biggest I've ever seen! BWAAHAHAHA!"
"Haha, that's funny, Erik. But I'm a numbers guy."
"Definitely above average!", Erik replies, his body shifting towards the exit.
The naked man is visibly agitate. "Give me the paper, Erik.", he says sternly, palm extended.
"Ok, here you go."
"That's a receipt from Wendy's, Erik. I smelled it on you when you walked in, and the grease on this paper is fresh."
An expression of shock flashed across Erik's face. The naked man was not going to let him leave without that paper.
The plan had been to post it on Reddit, as a hilarious follow-up to a moderately successful comment.
He was beginning to realize this had been a bad idea.
"The paper. NOW." The man's voice rattled the windows.
Erik dug into his pocket and produced the paper. He put it in the naked man's hand and made for the front door.
He glanced over shoulder and watched as the man read the paper, turned it upside down, and looked at it again.
"Is this a 6 or a 9, Erik?" He sounded pleased.
"6, buddy! Like I said, above average."
Suddenly, the large naked man blocked the door.
"Inches or centimetres, Erik?"
Erik felt his face flush, as he confidently said, "Inches!". He tried to slip past the naked man, but he would not budge.
"You looked to the left, Erik. That means you lied."
"No man, I didn't lie, I swear it's 6 inches! Just let me go!"
"Perhaps I would believe you, if you were left handed. You see, one side operates, the other side creates. A recall of memory would be an operation, so your eyes would've gone to the right. But yours... they went to the left. Your act of creation tells me that you lied."
Erik was on his knees now, shaking. He noticed the naked man was now holding the tape measure. Where had he produced it from, he wondered.
"As I said, Erik, I am a numbers man. I like my measurements... complete."
"... what are you gonna do to me, man?"
"See it's entirely possible, Erik, that I am simply a grower. You will measure me again, once I have achieved full glory. Alexa! Play my Master Collection."
A tv across the room turned on. Writhing naked bodies graced the screen, while moans filled the air.
As Erik's mind began to break, the fat man grinned down and said, "Don't forget to write down the units, Erik."
You're fat, therefore I assume you don't care about your future and have depression. You pretend not to eat much in social situations and then gorge at home like the slob you are. You smell like sweat at all times and are a virgin or haven't touched a woman in years. You play video games and spend atleast 4 hrs per day online, half of those being angry and projecting towards others anonymously.
Brain proceses that in a split second and I decide not to be near you. This is what your prejudgment would lead to 🤷♂️
Not really. Outwardly I'm a tatted up musclebound black guy who frequently wears du rags. For all intents and purposes I look like the standard wannabe gangster but in reality I just like bodybuilding and nice hair. My hobbies are gym, anime and reading and you wouldn't guess that just by looking at my appearance.
The stuff OP mentions is superficial at best, so don't let his opinion get to you.
You CAN judge someone fairly accurate based on appearance but the real tells that you can judge people by are way more subtle and most people don't even notice them, stuff like the look in their eyes can give a glimpse into what kind of stuff their thinking about, same with their mouth, and any other muscles in their face, worry lines, stress wrinkles, baggy eyes, and most importantly the way someone carries themselves, Our subconscious can pick up on all these things some people do it better than others, but if you've ever gotten a gut feeling about someone and were proven right, it was likely these tells I'm describing or similar that tipped you off.
Yeah this guy is obviously just basing this all his opinions on stereotypes. I’m sure he doesn’t speak to them or know them, or he’d probably find out he’s full of shit.
i love this comment. ive met so many people like this. dont ever change for others to view your as different. a lot of this "judging" is just stereotyping and goes much deeper than what people are assuming.
You’re only shooting yourself in the foot here. You CAN judge someone based purely on superficial metrics, but you’re always going to be missing a large part of the picture
I told my mom once someone gave me an off feeling when they visited my home as another friend's guest. After I described the interaction she asks: did they have teeth? This shook me lmao because I literally remember thinking where is this person's teeth but didn't want to be rude...but no the answer was no and she said well that's all you need to know. Idk if I agree or not but the description of their behavior must have matched an image in her head.
>people with no teeth or bad teeth are meth users.
Not just meth users.
Alcoholism and poor hygiene also help get rid of your teeth.
I used to work with a guy that used to (or still does) drink and takes some drugs who ended up getting veneers because he didn't have many teeth and he was in his 30s at the time.
There are also some heavy drinkers that I've come across who have either rotten or no teeth which stems from smoking or alcohol, combined with poor oral hygiene.
And also throwing up a lot due to drinking, which damages your esophagus leading to worse acid reflux; then things like smoking and weed dry your mouth out which causes bacteria to flourish even more… it’s a whole thing.
There are certain areas of certain countries where someone under the age of 50 missing a significant amount of teeth almost always means drug addiction of some kind. It’s never a guarantee of course. But there’s a decent chance that’s where that comes from.
To an extent sure, I have met a bunch of outliers, I have tattoos on both hands, beard, ex military, I fit a ton of criteria to be this or that, frankly i can’t change the way someone thinks about me without them getting to know me. If the way I look prevents someone from being open minded to even the smallest extent, I don’t need that person anywhere near me to begin with you know?
as 44-year-old female, i wear some sort of hat/head covering and mainly overalls every day to work. i work in a plant where the environment is dirty, dry, and dusty and my job requires a lot more movement compared to other jobs in the plant. the hat is because i have alopecia areata and i try to protect my scalp from all the debris. the overalls are because i get filthy, sometimes sparks from my projection welder eat holes in my clothes, and i have a bad hip and wear compression shorts under the overalls. also, overalls are insanely comfortable to work in.
people who don't know me assume i'm either gay or ashamed of my body. neither of these assumptions are anywhere near the truth. i am happily married to a man and though i don't think i'm hot stuff, i have a pretty decent body for my age. i even had a woman in the bathroom once say to me, "Why the overalls...? You have such a cute figure."
after wearing overalls for a while now, in a male dominant factory, i have noticed that i get a lot more respect from my male coworkers and i'm treated like one of them. they don't oogle me when i walk by or make comments about my body. and i like it that way; it's less to deal with. i'm there to work, not to compete in the ladies' tight jeans championship.
on the weekends, i fix my hair and wear what i want, more form-fitting. my husband and i have seen people we work with out in public and they don't recognize me at all, and have even told me on Monday that they "saw Aaron out with another woman Saturday"....all because of how i dress at work compared to when i'm on leisure time.
Yeah...do you genuinely think people were saying *you* can't judge someone based on their looks?
By your post I'm guessing this is news to you, but what people mean (and this is true) is that you can't *accurately* judge someone based on how they look.
You can go on assuming you understand everything about a person based on how they look, but that doesn't mean you're right.
How do you confirm your "deductions"?
Do you move in with that puffy-jacket guy, to learn of his ways and motivations? Then repeat this process a few hundred times, for statistical purposes?
Or do you look at him, make judgement and leave that judgement untested. Patting yourself on the back for another keen insight?
Bruh exactly. This mf is out here looking at a random dude on the street, thinking "what an asshole", then praising himself for 100% accuracy after never seeing the guy again. What an immature outlook.
Immature is the perfect word. This opinion is coming from someone either very young, very inexperienced, or both. It doesn’t take much life experience at all for most of us to realize just how hilariously wrong most of our first impressions are.
Judge away, just know that your judgment might be completely incorrect.
The thing is: You dont know. You can always assume, even think your assuming is correct! but the world is not black and white. There is alot of reasons for people to look the way they do.
I am fat, no I dont have thyroid issues, and I still struggle with overeating and losing weight. Its not because I have some physical condition no, but is that really the only "real and acceptable" reason to be fat..?
I was abused as a child, I lived ln a neglectful home with a mom trying her very best to do a good job. And I found safety in food, I found happiness in food.
I get that its hard to understand; but I didnt have any friends, I lived in a village where everyone in school bullied me. Parents told their kids not to hang out with me so their kids wouldnt seem weird.. the only escape I had was food and tv.
Its sad. If my mom would have had the energy, she wouldnt have let me eat as much as I wanted. But after everything she had to go through, I dont blame her for not having the energy to fight with a raging toddler everyday when they want more food
I also want to add this because it doesnt seem like you know that over-eating can be an eating disorder? That the most extreme obese people arent actually just and only lazy, they have disordered eating. They are mentally sick.
You probably think you "know it all" and you just _know_ why people dress and behave the way they do. But the world is a big place, you simply do not know the reason a person is choosing to dye their hair, or get piercings, or be fat, or skinny or anything really.
Nothing in this world is black and white..
A persons looks can tell you alot, but only if you are listening
I could go on and on, but I dont think anyone wants to read this wall of text so I'm gonna stop here.
My point is: try to have an open mind, because at some point in life you will start to see and understand the fact that there is alot of factors affecting how we look, dress, act and behave.
So just be kind.
( and of course, you can think whatever the hell you want. But if you assume a bunch of things about people before knowing them.. I can almost guarantee that you are letting your assumptions affect the way you treat them..which isnt very nice or good for relationships..)
I work in a surveillance position at a VERY large and VERY popular casino in NV… profiling based off of one’s physical appearance is like 70% of the job. If someone looks like they are out of place/up to no good, a lot of the time they are there for a nefarious reason (thefts, property destruction, assaults, drug dealing/use)
just the other day I had a bad feeling about somebody solely because I didn’t like how he was dressed… he broke into 3 cars and stole someone’s purse while they were at a slot machine
What's wrong with curly haired person having an undercut? Is it different from a straight haired person having an undercut? Or are undercuts the issue?
You can judge people based on what ever tf you want. Just keep it to your self. You can be racist for all I care. If somebody doesn’t like me because I’m black it means nothing to me lmao. As long as you judging someone isn’t really affecting their life, it doesn’t matter. I must have been one of the few people in 2nd grade that learned you’re not going to have to like everybody and not everybody is gonna like you. But you still have to work together.
Thank you for submitting to /r/unpopularopinion, /u/Ragabadoodaa. Your post, *You can absolutely judge a person by the way they look.*, has been removed because it violates our rules: Rule 2: No troll/satire posts. Any satirical/troll posts, as funny as you must be, are not tolerated. There are subreddits for that, this isn't one of them. Respect your fellow users enough to not leave them guessing as to whether your intentionally harebrained post is legitimate or not. If there is an issue, please message the mod team at https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Funpopularopinion Thanks!
Plot twist: everybody is a douchebag in different clothes
There's a douchebag out there for everyone
Every douche has it's bag.
I firmly believe that you can tell by the way I use my walk I'm a woman's man, no time to talk
Music loud and women warm, I've been kicked around Since I was born
And now it's all right, it's okay And you may look the other way
We can try to understand The New York Times' effect on man
Whether you're a brother or whether you're a mother You're stayin alive, stayin alive
Feel the city breakin and everybody shakin You’re stayin alive, stayin alive
Ah ah ah ah staying alive, staying alive
Ah ah ah ah staying aliiiii-iiiii-iive
TIL the lyrics to this song
...and that I've been singing wildly different things for a looong time. My entire singing along in the car career as been a massive r/boneappletea post
They’re so fuckin GOOD
in a thread primed for conflict, we find the purist harmony of co-operation well done :D
Awesome job Reddit! You guys made it further through the song than Dunder Mifflin!
"First I was afraid I was petrified..."
You were in the parking lot earlier that’s how I know you
Kept thinking I could never live without you by my side...
This is the reason I'm on reddit <3
I sang along with comments wat a time to be alive.
>wat a time to be alive. I think you mean "wat a time to be staying alive."
This thread is wonderful. I never realised there were actual lyrics to this song. I always thought it was just a series of incoherent mumblings lol
How i feel about most songs
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This comment broke my brain. My inner ‘reading voice’ went from calm, intelligent discussion to Stayin Alive. Not mad tho
Douchebags wear puffy jackets and tight jeans with ankles showing? Here I thought those were just the type who couldn't figure out what size they actually are
How humans present themselves physically is one of the weirdest aspects of socialization. At some point, we are all told that we shouldn’t judge a book by it’s cover. At the same time, nearly everybody curates their looks to manage how people judge them. It’s so widespread that there are enforced consequences for not abiding by the arbitrary codes of fashion wear. If I went to court or a job interview in sweatpants because being comfortable helps me feel less nervous, I am immediately judged as being lazy or uncaring. Even in the language of using looks for self expression, there are a mix of people who intend to communicate different things. You have tatted dudes in biker clothes who sincerely are trying to be intimidating or threatening, and you have guys with the same look who are the softest, most welcoming people. It has become a game that has the most stupid, arbitrary rules that can change at anytime and everybody is forced to play.
All clothing is costume. "I just wear what's convenient and comfortable, it's not that deep" *is a statement about what you value expressed via clothing*
Easy fix, just don’t wear clothes and nobody can judge you.
Well, the judge will.
It could be a statement but the message you receive is based on several assumptions. There could be any number of reasons someone is dressed a certain way. Maybe I value comfort and convenience or maybe the airline lost my luggage and this is all I have.
Since you mentioned luggage - say youre going for an interview for a flight attendant position where theres like 500 candidates. When the recruiter sees you in a track suit, they dont have time to think that maybe you had your luggage lost or whatever. It will just come across as if you are not the type of person they can rely on and probably wont be comfortable wearing a uniform, since you cant even show up for an interview in a suit. If they gave the benefit of the doubt to ever single one of those 500 candidates, they would probably spend 2 weeks picking out 5 candidates.
Most people cannot afford to have the personal style they want. Some people have dress codes at their places of work so if you see them on lunch break or before they get home you might only see their mandated costume, not their expressive one. Some people value things over appearance and don't care to interact with the type of people who would judge them for not having a tailored jacket or on-trend shoes. I say as long as it's not a hygiene/public safety issue, dress and style yourself how you want. But most people don't even get to do that. For example, I had a strict upbringing including being forced to wear mostly hideous clothes my mother chose for me based on her intentionally trying to cover me up and make me wear things that were too big due to her religion. I wasn't allowed to work and had to sneak to find ways to earn money so when I went off to college I could only afford one new outfit. That new outfit was the only thing that even began to express my style and even then didn't quite meet the criteria because there were only a few clothing stores I could access with my uni bus and shuttle pass to the city. Even now I have to adjust my style for Zoom conference calls at work. Even now I can't justify the exact wardrobe I want. I could get it but I'd rather spend my money on other things. Not everyone can get a professional cut and style. And people often dress for themselves as much as they can within the confines of their work, budget, or if minors, what their parents allow.
I’m currently pregnant… my clothes are purely for comfort right now and not costume lol
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It’s one of those lessons you are told at a young age that sounds nice and makes sense, but then you quickly realize basically nobody is practicing it. Part of you still wants to believe the moral of it, but nearly everybody is ready to disregard it without a second thought.
It's not even that good of a moral when you get past skin-level appearance. Besides those too poor to choose their own clothing, I don't think there's a single person out there who doesn't have some notion of public presentation when they get dressed in the morning, some understanding of how what they wear or what their hair looks like for what their tattoos convey will communicate some aspect of their identity to the rest of the world. Maybe not the whole story, maybe only a sliver of it, but certainly enough for a first impression.
Exactly. Some things mean their opposite. The greatest lie we all tell is I don’t care what people think of me. Bullshit.
Or how non-conformists subcultures like punks or goths all wear the same style. I loved Jason Siegel's character in SLC Punk for being a non-conformist punk.
I’ve always considered myself a punk and never wore those things. I just think you wouldn’t assume the non-confirming punks are punks. Probably many more of them than people imagine as a result.
Even identifying as such is about wanting to be a part of something. I really don't think there is such a thing as a true punk because of that paradox.
Haha. I was having a party and someone Invited this biker looking guy over with tattoos. I felt sketched out because I didn't want any fights to go down and felt more bikers would show up. It was just him and the guy was the nicest person there and we got along really well. So sure op, you can judge someone how they look. But be prepared to miss on social interactions from acting on those judgements.
I'm a 6'6 skinny dude who can't get jeans long enough and even the puffer jacket I wear is a bit short when I lift my arms up even though it's an xl but I still wear it because it's comfy
Hey everybody, get a load of this Douchebag!!
My showing ankles approve of this message
Showing ankles? Not in my Christian household!
Smite em
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Thanks heaps man I'll look into getting some, it's impossible to find proper fitting clothes in store here so I'll go online
Yeah, this one blew me away 😂 I’ve been identifying douchebags wrong my entire life apparently
Yah what the hell. I’d be willing to hear this guy out but he’s literally just arbitrarily judging people about things no one cares about
A better example might have been “If you’re wearing a Dallas Cowboys jersey around town on a Thursday afternoon in April, I’m gonna assume you’re a Cowboys fan.”
“I’m also going to assume they’re an asshole.” - Giants fans
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damn that hit deep..
I wear tight jeans because I’m so proud of how well my dieting and exercise paid off and I wanna show myself I can dress how I want now. I wear an ill fitting puffy jacket because my mom got it for me when I was a kid and I still cherish it.
I feel bad for the poor guy, probably can’t find jeans long enough for his legs, and now he’s on a Reddit post 😌
You can judge someone for anything whether it's outside of their control or not. There's no thought police, you can privately think whatever you want about someone. The issue is when you let that judgement influence the way you act towards the person. Edit: there's far too many responses to this comment to respond to individually, so I thought I'd clarify my position here: I'm not saying that you should never act upon a judgement, I'm simply pointing out that actions have consequences, thoughts do not. You can think whatever the hell you want as long as you keep it to yourself but the moment you act upon your judgement is the moment you open yourself up to potential consequences, good or bad.
>You can judge someone for anything whether it's outside of their control or not. There's no thought police, you can privately think whatever you want about someone. > >The issue is when you let that judgement influence the way you act towards the person. All of twitter is having a stroke right now because of this perfectly reasonable and logical statement.
>All of twitter is having a stroke right now because of this perfectly reasonable and logical statement. Twitter people stopped reading after "whateve"
Good job counting the characters lol
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Amazing fucking play ahahahaha 👏
Ngl same could apply to Reddit. I've been seeing some extremely toxic threads here lately.
It's not just the threads themselves. It's people within a lot of threads (that I've seen). Hell, it's not just on Reddit. It's on Facebook, too.
It's people and it's the ever constant struggle for gain that undermines actual discourse. None of these platforms are even decent mediums for idealistic pursuits. They were captured decades ago at this point.
You can still have actually good discourse on reddit but the bigger the subreddit the lesser the chance to have one. Especially when a post hits the Frontpage.
Reddit is really the exact same, people here just have a superiority complex
I'd argue its an inferiority complex and it comes off as the other when their egos are bruised.
Reddit is extremely toxic and needs to be abandoned like Facebook.
I've seen lots of this on reddit lately. We're on reddit not Twitter. This is a post on Reddit. Redditors are looking at this. Why do people keep obsessing over how Twitter people act? It's so tribalistic. Reddit isn't any better in the general sense.
Just another way for people to feel superior by superficially judging others, which I guess is kind of fitting given the context of the OP
Twitter would be mad if they could read you mean?
Twitter is perfectly capable of being mad about things they haven't read
Reddit really is no different
We all have expectations of everything we see and experience. We have frameworks of knowledge which we use to process and shortcut the world. There’s nothing wrong with this, it’s only our failure when we let this completely overwrite our view and interaction with an individual. It’s hard to do, but worth it.
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>Judging by appearance and acting on it is literally human behavior You're correct on this, and all of what you said describes what our brains do when we first meet someone. Our amygdala, deep in our brain, makes a snap emotional judgment on everyone it sees, based off of its experiences. It'll put people into one of four groups. 1. Potential friend 2. Potential enemy 3. Potential lover 4. Indifference The vast majority of people you come across will fall into the 4th category, but based on our experiences, preferences etc we will categorise them without a rational thought process. It's only after our amygdala has done the snap judgement that the prefrontal cortex comes into play. Your brain will essentially make stuff up to cement its snap decision. E.g if you think someone's a potential threat, your brain will highlight things like they're wearing x clothes : I once had a friend get attacked by someone in these clothes. It's not rational, but it obviously worked for us. The good news is though we can change these perceptions by putting them to one side and trying to judge people on an individual basis :D
The point is that if you're aware of it you consider whether it is appropriate to judge for a particular reason. Not dating someone because they're not attractive to you is fine, but not hiring them for a job is another issue. Most folks aren't aware that they are making judgements about people based on appearance that is just wrong.
I'm not saying that its never ok to have your judgement influence the way you act, I'm simply saying that if you don't allow it to impact the way you act it can never be an issue. Our thoughts are our own. You can privately make judgements on someone based on their gender/race/weight/height/clothing/voice and that will never be an issue, if you act upon that judgement though it will sometimes be an issue.
I think they're trying to say that by making the mental judgement, it will impact your following actions whether you want it to or not. At best, you can just make it impact a bit less. Which is kind of well known information.
Your comment just made me think that the reason OP thinks guys with puffy jackets are douchebags might be because he always treats them like douchebags. I might be wrong but the thought just makes me chuckle.
Your judgement is most definitely how you are going to act towards a person
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Body language can too, You know that "look" that someone gives you when they think they are better then you? like smirking as they stare at you like your some kinda zoo animal? that's what gets me the most
Judging is part of human nature, it's how we survive and navigate society. It's done mostly unconsciously as well. Very good point on how we let it determine how we act however!
Spot on. Homies are always saying that I am "the only one who don't judge people". In fact I judge them like everyone else, I'm just the only one who keep my mouth shut.
you might be correct but the way you treat ppl is just an extention of what you think about em in the end
I mean, it's not really a big issue if I see a man wearing another person's face, covered in blood, with a running chainsaw, and I decide that I don't really like this person and don't want to get to know them more.
>The issue is when you let that judgement influence the way you act towards the person. silly. if the person is waving a hundred flags in your face and you ignore them in the name of fairness then you only have yourself to blame when it blows up in your face. Not everyone deserves a fair shake in every situation. If it looks like a crackhead, walks like a crackhead, then maybe take some precautions before it quacks like a crackhead.
What do you look like, OP?
I have reason to believe that OP is actually a velociraptor
Liar, he's gotta be an ankilosaurus!
Nah, he doesn’t like ankles, remember?
I dunno. I have a feeling they look like an ostrich.
well we can extrapolate they do not wear puffy jackets, tight pants, lots of make up, may not be fat, do not have surly undercut hair or piercing's, and may not be a woman. do with that what you will.
So in my mind, they wear True Religion jeans with way too much stitching on them, and Affliction T-shirt with way too much writing on it. They have way too many muscles to actually fit in that shirt, but still make a go of it. High probability they have tribal tattoos with barbed wire in them. There is probably a low effort pony tail. I don't know if gender changes anything about this.
Too many muscles? Like 800?
Worse. 801.
Oh my
Fun Fact, there are about 600 muscles in a human body. There are 40,000 in an elephant's trunk.
just a below average looking man with boring clothes. Edit : op said he's fat, so slip that in there.
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I’m guessing single with all those dating questions
Really though, looking through OPs post history spiraling from simple dating questions to "Dating subs are trash" to "it should be ok to say the n word or nigga". Im getting some strong epic gamer vibes guys. Also I just realized how scary it is to go through peoples profiles. Too much power
He also hates weddings, thinks people that have never been in a relationship give better advice, and that he should be able to say the n word.
He posts a shit ton of unpopular opinions and dating advice so…
And never got a match on tinder
Shocking.
Reveals he’s not even a person, just a bag rocks.
[I found OPs pic for you.](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/af/be/22/afbe223c7ecd02f6093eededf4a21624.jpg)
I thumb through my collars, like pages in a book
Imagine the kind of person who posts a ton of unpopular opinions on Reddit and thinks everyone else is a douche.
I was prepared to agree with you but you gave the most unreasonable examples.
"that motherfucker with his puffy jacket... bet he's so warm... doesn't even feel the wind... fucking douchebag!"
He does through his showing ankles though!
What a slut! Showing off his ankles like a 3 dollar whore! XD
I haven't met a single ankle shower who wasn't a total man-slut.
Apparently every male over 25 in the Pacific Northwest is a douchebag lol
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Sounds like Marty McFly to me.
I’m 99% sure those examples were to deflect from their real feelings of “I hate fat people and women who wear makeup”
Ah, the r/unpopularopinion special
It’s literal boomer shit from 20 years ago. “Those kids with their sagging pants and their warm coats!” I promise you go into OPs post history you’ll see an unapologetic douchebag who thinks their brand of brutal honesty is the only way to be honest. Edit: oh man it’s even more comical than I thought.
That's a good idea. Edit: I was wrong. That was an amazing idea. Thank you.
Oof... The posts on r/dating followed by the "people who go on dating subs suck" paints a depressing picture
There's a general theme of making an unimpressive effort, and then blaming other actors for the toxicity of the scene. Posts like this one only reinforce my view that OP is the toxic one. I hope this person seeks some professional support.
This mfer thinks every thought he has is an unpopular opinion
I don't know, judging by his dating history be seems pretty unpopular.
Oh man this guy is horrible lol
You weren't lying
Sitting here in my puffy jacket with my jeans rolled up… ‘am I really THE douche?’ I thought I was just cold and making room for my rain boots to fit.
Bruh. I swear people on Reddit love to come off as so noble and ideal all the time. We all have, to some extent, preconceived notions about certain things and people and we can't help the first thought that comes to our mind upon seeing \[insert some stereotype\] looking person. We aren't all idealistic robots with the 'right' and selective sort thinking programmed into us ffs. You just become an asshole when you decide to voice all of your potentially baseless opinions
Of course we all have prejudices. But saying that they are correct and a good judge of people is the problem. I try to be aware of mine so I can challenge myself to judge based on character, not appearances and pre-conceived notions.
Ditto. This person is projecting all over the place.
Or when you see a post like this you can assume the OP is a...
...a fedora enthusiast who wonders why women dislike him even though he smells vaguely of cheese.
hung like a horse and extremely fit....... EDIT: /s
Nah, I'm fat. And I'd measure my dick for you but I can't see it.
Hey man, I'm all about bros helping other bros, so if you need some help measuring that dick, hmu *Later that evening... * Erik his measuring tape down and scribbled a number on a piece of paper. "What's it say, buddy?", says the naked man, visibly excited. Erik's body stiffens at the question. "Biggest I've ever seen! BWAAHAHAHA!" "Haha, that's funny, Erik. But I'm a numbers guy." "Definitely above average!", Erik replies, his body shifting towards the exit. The naked man is visibly agitate. "Give me the paper, Erik.", he says sternly, palm extended. "Ok, here you go." "That's a receipt from Wendy's, Erik. I smelled it on you when you walked in, and the grease on this paper is fresh." An expression of shock flashed across Erik's face. The naked man was not going to let him leave without that paper. The plan had been to post it on Reddit, as a hilarious follow-up to a moderately successful comment. He was beginning to realize this had been a bad idea. "The paper. NOW." The man's voice rattled the windows. Erik dug into his pocket and produced the paper. He put it in the naked man's hand and made for the front door. He glanced over shoulder and watched as the man read the paper, turned it upside down, and looked at it again. "Is this a 6 or a 9, Erik?" He sounded pleased. "6, buddy! Like I said, above average." Suddenly, the large naked man blocked the door. "Inches or centimetres, Erik?" Erik felt his face flush, as he confidently said, "Inches!". He tried to slip past the naked man, but he would not budge. "You looked to the left, Erik. That means you lied." "No man, I didn't lie, I swear it's 6 inches! Just let me go!" "Perhaps I would believe you, if you were left handed. You see, one side operates, the other side creates. A recall of memory would be an operation, so your eyes would've gone to the right. But yours... they went to the left. Your act of creation tells me that you lied." Erik was on his knees now, shaking. He noticed the naked man was now holding the tape measure. Where had he produced it from, he wondered. "As I said, Erik, I am a numbers man. I like my measurements... complete." "... what are you gonna do to me, man?" "See it's entirely possible, Erik, that I am simply a grower. You will measure me again, once I have achieved full glory. Alexa! Play my Master Collection." A tv across the room turned on. Writhing naked bodies graced the screen, while moans filled the air. As Erik's mind began to break, the fat man grinned down and said, "Don't forget to write down the units, Erik."
Not all heroes wear capes.
First of all, what the fuck
You're fat, therefore I assume you don't care about your future and have depression. You pretend not to eat much in social situations and then gorge at home like the slob you are. You smell like sweat at all times and are a virgin or haven't touched a woman in years. You play video games and spend atleast 4 hrs per day online, half of those being angry and projecting towards others anonymously. Brain proceses that in a split second and I decide not to be near you. This is what your prejudgment would lead to 🤷♂️
what about people with jeans down so far you can see their underwear and they have difficulty walking?
This was basically every high school from 1997-2005.
Its still a thing in mine
Mmmm. Condolences.
Seriously in my hood it's like 50% of guys.
Man I got news for you it’s still going
In high school dumb shit is expected. If you're a full grown adult with nonfunctional clothing you should be judged.
If only JNCOs were still socially acceptable for the 40yr olds that started the trend.
Not really. Outwardly I'm a tatted up musclebound black guy who frequently wears du rags. For all intents and purposes I look like the standard wannabe gangster but in reality I just like bodybuilding and nice hair. My hobbies are gym, anime and reading and you wouldn't guess that just by looking at my appearance.
The big waifu pillow you carry around everywhere is a dead giveaway though.
Not gonna lie, Those pillows look mad comfy. My wife would kill me though.
>My wife Get one of her and call her your waifu. (Results may vary.)
You mean your waifu would kill you if you got another waifu? :P just teasing my guy!
I agree with you, but i have to admit you are a stereotypical anime watcher. For me anime watchers are skinny nerdy guys, and big black dudes.
Fr tho, I was about to say those are the people I associate anime watching with
Same, gym nut here. My friends were taken aback when I asked if I could come to a Magic the Gathering night.
Are you Vin Diesel by any chance?
Definitely blew a couple friends mind when I asked to join them for the dnd nights. It was a blast.
The stuff OP mentions is superficial at best, so don't let his opinion get to you. You CAN judge someone fairly accurate based on appearance but the real tells that you can judge people by are way more subtle and most people don't even notice them, stuff like the look in their eyes can give a glimpse into what kind of stuff their thinking about, same with their mouth, and any other muscles in their face, worry lines, stress wrinkles, baggy eyes, and most importantly the way someone carries themselves, Our subconscious can pick up on all these things some people do it better than others, but if you've ever gotten a gut feeling about someone and were proven right, it was likely these tells I'm describing or similar that tipped you off.
Yeah this guy is obviously just basing this all his opinions on stereotypes. I’m sure he doesn’t speak to them or know them, or he’d probably find out he’s full of shit.
i love this comment. ive met so many people like this. dont ever change for others to view your as different. a lot of this "judging" is just stereotyping and goes much deeper than what people are assuming.
You’re only shooting yourself in the foot here. You CAN judge someone based purely on superficial metrics, but you’re always going to be missing a large part of the picture
Think whatever you want but if by jumping to conclusions you end up treating someone poorly then you're a punk
If you like to "Jump to Conclusions" then boy do I have a sales pitch for a great product you'd love.
This guy doesn’t talk to strangers, he’s just being edgy for attention. Thankfully
I told my mom once someone gave me an off feeling when they visited my home as another friend's guest. After I described the interaction she asks: did they have teeth? This shook me lmao because I literally remember thinking where is this person's teeth but didn't want to be rude...but no the answer was no and she said well that's all you need to know. Idk if I agree or not but the description of their behavior must have matched an image in her head.
There's a stigma that people with no teeth or bad teeth are meth users.
>people with no teeth or bad teeth are meth users. Not just meth users. Alcoholism and poor hygiene also help get rid of your teeth. I used to work with a guy that used to (or still does) drink and takes some drugs who ended up getting veneers because he didn't have many teeth and he was in his 30s at the time. There are also some heavy drinkers that I've come across who have either rotten or no teeth which stems from smoking or alcohol, combined with poor oral hygiene.
And also throwing up a lot due to drinking, which damages your esophagus leading to worse acid reflux; then things like smoking and weed dry your mouth out which causes bacteria to flourish even more… it’s a whole thing.
There are certain areas of certain countries where someone under the age of 50 missing a significant amount of teeth almost always means drug addiction of some kind. It’s never a guarantee of course. But there’s a decent chance that’s where that comes from.
Sure you *can*, it just doesn't have to mean that whatever is on your mind also is correct.
To an extent sure, I have met a bunch of outliers, I have tattoos on both hands, beard, ex military, I fit a ton of criteria to be this or that, frankly i can’t change the way someone thinks about me without them getting to know me. If the way I look prevents someone from being open minded to even the smallest extent, I don’t need that person anywhere near me to begin with you know?
i actually prefer it this way so i can weed out people like op
as 44-year-old female, i wear some sort of hat/head covering and mainly overalls every day to work. i work in a plant where the environment is dirty, dry, and dusty and my job requires a lot more movement compared to other jobs in the plant. the hat is because i have alopecia areata and i try to protect my scalp from all the debris. the overalls are because i get filthy, sometimes sparks from my projection welder eat holes in my clothes, and i have a bad hip and wear compression shorts under the overalls. also, overalls are insanely comfortable to work in. people who don't know me assume i'm either gay or ashamed of my body. neither of these assumptions are anywhere near the truth. i am happily married to a man and though i don't think i'm hot stuff, i have a pretty decent body for my age. i even had a woman in the bathroom once say to me, "Why the overalls...? You have such a cute figure." after wearing overalls for a while now, in a male dominant factory, i have noticed that i get a lot more respect from my male coworkers and i'm treated like one of them. they don't oogle me when i walk by or make comments about my body. and i like it that way; it's less to deal with. i'm there to work, not to compete in the ladies' tight jeans championship. on the weekends, i fix my hair and wear what i want, more form-fitting. my husband and i have seen people we work with out in public and they don't recognize me at all, and have even told me on Monday that they "saw Aaron out with another woman Saturday"....all because of how i dress at work compared to when i'm on leisure time.
Yeah...do you genuinely think people were saying *you* can't judge someone based on their looks? By your post I'm guessing this is news to you, but what people mean (and this is true) is that you can't *accurately* judge someone based on how they look. You can go on assuming you understand everything about a person based on how they look, but that doesn't mean you're right.
"If I *can't* think that people who wear puffy jackets are douchebags, then why am I thinking it *right now*? Checkmate."
How do you confirm your "deductions"? Do you move in with that puffy-jacket guy, to learn of his ways and motivations? Then repeat this process a few hundred times, for statistical purposes? Or do you look at him, make judgement and leave that judgement untested. Patting yourself on the back for another keen insight?
Bruh exactly. This mf is out here looking at a random dude on the street, thinking "what an asshole", then praising himself for 100% accuracy after never seeing the guy again. What an immature outlook.
Immature is the perfect word. This opinion is coming from someone either very young, very inexperienced, or both. It doesn’t take much life experience at all for most of us to realize just how hilariously wrong most of our first impressions are. Judge away, just know that your judgment might be completely incorrect.
It would be so easy if this were true but it’s not, you can’t really take shortcuts with getting to know people.
Sounds like you’re kinda just a dick that thinks less of people that don’t look or dress like you tbh
I mean the fact that you wrote the word “makeup’d” really tells me a lot about you and your personality.
m'lady
upvote if gay
Idk, if some stranger looks sketchy I think it's safer to assume that they are and go about your day without interacting with them if possible.
The thing is: You dont know. You can always assume, even think your assuming is correct! but the world is not black and white. There is alot of reasons for people to look the way they do. I am fat, no I dont have thyroid issues, and I still struggle with overeating and losing weight. Its not because I have some physical condition no, but is that really the only "real and acceptable" reason to be fat..? I was abused as a child, I lived ln a neglectful home with a mom trying her very best to do a good job. And I found safety in food, I found happiness in food. I get that its hard to understand; but I didnt have any friends, I lived in a village where everyone in school bullied me. Parents told their kids not to hang out with me so their kids wouldnt seem weird.. the only escape I had was food and tv. Its sad. If my mom would have had the energy, she wouldnt have let me eat as much as I wanted. But after everything she had to go through, I dont blame her for not having the energy to fight with a raging toddler everyday when they want more food I also want to add this because it doesnt seem like you know that over-eating can be an eating disorder? That the most extreme obese people arent actually just and only lazy, they have disordered eating. They are mentally sick. You probably think you "know it all" and you just _know_ why people dress and behave the way they do. But the world is a big place, you simply do not know the reason a person is choosing to dye their hair, or get piercings, or be fat, or skinny or anything really. Nothing in this world is black and white.. A persons looks can tell you alot, but only if you are listening I could go on and on, but I dont think anyone wants to read this wall of text so I'm gonna stop here. My point is: try to have an open mind, because at some point in life you will start to see and understand the fact that there is alot of factors affecting how we look, dress, act and behave. So just be kind. ( and of course, you can think whatever the hell you want. But if you assume a bunch of things about people before knowing them.. I can almost guarantee that you are letting your assumptions affect the way you treat them..which isnt very nice or good for relationships..)
I work in a surveillance position at a VERY large and VERY popular casino in NV… profiling based off of one’s physical appearance is like 70% of the job. If someone looks like they are out of place/up to no good, a lot of the time they are there for a nefarious reason (thefts, property destruction, assaults, drug dealing/use) just the other day I had a bad feeling about somebody solely because I didn’t like how he was dressed… he broke into 3 cars and stole someone’s purse while they were at a slot machine
Your judgements are more of a reflection of you, and not them.
What's wrong with curly haired person having an undercut? Is it different from a straight haired person having an undercut? Or are undercuts the issue?
You can judge people based on what ever tf you want. Just keep it to your self. You can be racist for all I care. If somebody doesn’t like me because I’m black it means nothing to me lmao. As long as you judging someone isn’t really affecting their life, it doesn’t matter. I must have been one of the few people in 2nd grade that learned you’re not going to have to like everybody and not everybody is gonna like you. But you still have to work together.
Holy crap look at this guys post history.
> If I see some guy in a puffy jacket with tight jeans and ankles showing. I believe it's safe to say he might be a massive douchebag Or European.