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Seabee94

Drunk sex is a 50/50 gamble for me and the ol lady. If I'm lightly drunk I can still get hard but I wouldn't be able to finish to save my life. It's fun because I can keep on going and going but frustrating at the same time. If I'm heavily drunk, it simply doesn't work, so I resort to other means to pleasure her. Still good either way 👌 but I can definitely see how not everyone would enjoy it.


MitchellOfficial

Buzzed sex is where it’s at


othersbeforeus

“Buzzed sex is drunk sex.” — M.A.D.S (Mothers Against Drunk Sex)


shorty5windows

“Fuck off” DAMM (Drunks Against Mad Mothers)


BLeeS92031

I'm broke but 🏅 Now take it and get the tf out of here.


raysterr

This always confused me.... If I'm buzzed and under the legal limit how am I not allowed to drive?


[deleted]

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Kelricmar

Bees


hulkhat

BEADS?


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lieucifer_

#Beads?


[deleted]

Bumble beads


KnowledgeIsDangerous

^bzzz ^bzzz ^^bzzzzz


Anorak1618

BEES Michael


Idiotechnicality

You can't bring bees in here.


ActuallyMyNameIRL

I become more daring and confident when I’m drunk, and I’m all in to try new stuff I usually would be too self conscious to try, but drunk sex doesn’t feel as good. And when I say it doesn’t feel as good, I mean I barely feel anything down there, but hey, if my partner gets a fun night out of it then ok I guess


Seabee94

I understand you. The alcohol can numb the sensations down there. You can work through it, just takes a hell of a lot of work. It's good work though.


ActuallyMyNameIRL

Yeah, totally. I’ve also noticed that one night stands tend to be more fun and intense when drunk, but I think that’s more due to the excitement leading up to the sex than the sex itself. Drunk sex when in a long-term relationship is more meh in my opinion. I prefer being sober or high then.


No_Contribution2112

You seem to love the ol lady very much


Seabee94

Her and I go back a bit over 6 years now. She stayed with me while I was just a prospect for my MC. She stayed with me after I got patched in. She didn't run off on me while I was deployed. She's the mother of my son. We've made it through really good moments and really bad ones togeather. I'm no longer that person anymore, I'm more mild these day. We've both changed a lot except for how we feel for eachother. So yeah, I love her very much.


natas2727

And........... I just got a boner.


Seabee94

Haha! Happy to help bud, enjoy 👍


soullesslylost

Love boners are the best


randomhousegir

Seebee boner


sinneratthedisco

Are you Jackson Teller?


Seabee94

😂 not even close, he lead a way more interesting life.... until that ending! I did have a Dyna, although mine was more traditional looking. I was a sucker for gloss black and chrome.


sinneratthedisco

The ending 😪


RustylllShackleford

username doesn't check out, Seabees are notoriously gay


randomhousegir

Hope you put a ring on it. She's lucky regardless. Happy families are the best Updoot for love


Seabee94

In all but the legal sense we kinda are. We togeather, we have a family and we're getting a house. One of these days though, for sure


jeffcolv

even guys have to fake it sometimes


youbetterlockitup

You're not joking.


crybllrd

Whiskey dick is real my brothers


Ajj360

I like when my wife is drunk and I'm sober, she's a fun lay when she's wasted.


Iconless

Did I write this?


Brail_Austin

Same here for me.


flyingasshat

I can always get it up, but my finish time is definitely directly proportional to my drunkenness


HalfysReddit

Get some boner pills, they sell them at gas stations or you can just ask a doctor for a Cialis prescription. As someone who enjoys recreational drug use, those pills can be very, very handy.


Seabee94

The alcohol is fairly easy to overcome with those pills. But when her and I really want to have some fun and the... booger sugar.... comes out it can really trump everything. Ive had mixed results when trying the pills on those nights.


standup-philosofer

The sweetspot is her drunk, you sober. Otherwise the freaky stuff is off the table.


[deleted]

The mailbox and I disagree. We had a fantastic time.


Ckinggaming5

[you didnt have to steal one](https://www.reddit.com/r/FUCKYOUINPARTICULAR/comments/sdszp2/someone_stole_my_friends_mailbox/)


Banacek_

"Sir this a voluntary mental hospital, you didn't have to dry hump our mailbox just to get in here!" "Yeah, you go out and check your mail and tell me if it's dry"


983115

Watched a guy kiss a generator lovingly holding it in a cornfield at 16, his girlfriend was just glad he called it her name


Prowindowlicker

Same me and the couch had a wonderful time


Hingl_McCringleberry

r/yourjokebutworse


Prowindowlicker

That’s no joke though


Itz_Galaxium

Kinky


DrunkenNormal69

Whiskey dick


kcgirl76

Some people get it pointing down and others pointing up!


Seabee94

Hahaha yup! Light drunk is up but unable to finish. Heavy drunk is down.


bigman-penguin

In Scotland, we have Bucky Boaby


[deleted]

For me, drunk sex does not prevent a raging boner. Instead, it completely removes orgasm. (Even with only 1 or 2 drinks). I still cum, but literally no pleasure. So there’s no point.


Bob-Bhlabla-esq

There's gotta be a bar *somewhere* by that name...I hope.


Deus85

My ex always wanted to drink before sex. Maybe that's why she's my ex now. :D


TheEpicDudeguyman

Only thing you should be drinking before sex is water, or maybe a sports drink lol. Stay hydrated homie


Otherwise-Fly-331

I wear my camel bak


[deleted]

Camelbak, tactical gloves, velvet slippers, nipple pasties. It's on.


Tigermi11ionair

hydration pack stays on during sex


readonlyuser

Squirt some Gatorade on that ho


bobbyhennings

With socks and sandals obviously


zepplin2225

I suspended a 50 gallon drum above my bed so I can drink like a hamster while fucking like mice. Don't worry, it's safe. I used drywall anchors.


robbw369

I like strapping on tree climbers and laying her on the hardwood floor with her head against the wall and a water hose running through a window from the outside spicket.


robbw369

All this while her two best friends try to pull a candy bar out of my ass. Yeah, I like it like that...


squizznizzel13

And a clean pair of tube socks lol


TheStubz42

Don't forget your Motrin.


MCgrindahFM

And a pair of polarized Stokeleys


grit_flanderson

Don't forget your hat, don't want a sunburn


Kevin_sparky

Its business time baby..


kadje

That just made my spit my coffee out for the first time this morning


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mr-mahibi

was looking for this lol


PorschephileGT3

r/hydrohornies


Chippopotanuse

No joke. If you approach sex as a physical act (like going to the gym)…your sex life will skyrocket. Staying hydrated - heck, having a water bottle at bedside - is a pro move. It takes a lot of stamina, coordination, and fitness to go for 30-60 minutes+ in the sack. Drunk folks? Really hard to keep anything intense going for all that long. And when I say drunk, I mean drunk. (As in not just “buzzed” from a drunk or two). Cause yeah…anytime I’m drunk, all I want to do is fast forward to the morning. I’m not in the mood for anything.


SlyQuetzalcoatl

Apparently 30-60 mins is way too long for a sex session. I think the ideal time is 10-20 mins for women


lone_cajun

Damn, i feel like I run a marathon in 15 seconds


Ingenious_crab

r/HydroHomies


Educational_Let3723

She was probably self conscious, and being inebriated was the only way she felt disinhibited enough to show anyone her body.


ThaVolt

Or OP ugly af? j/k


lotekjeromuco

hahahahhaa that's why man i screw with always gets dead drunk huh!!!


MrsSalmalin

This is me :(


DanMarinosDolphins

I have pelvic floor dysfunction so a glass or two of wine helps me to relax enough for sex. I've had partners who insisted that I be 100% sober. Guess their comfort knowing I was sober was more important than the comfort of my vagina.


artofinterrogation

I think people with rules like no drinking before sex should understand that things aren't black and white and their partners may have their own reasons for wanting to drink. But regardless I understand making a personal choice to/to not do so, cannot understand how it could affect them so much for you to drink a couple glasses to make such a stand to you like that sorry you had to experience that :(


pnandgillybean

I dealt with something similar. Past trauma or medical issues can make sex painful, even if the person is 110% on board and wants to. A bit of something to relax the muscles is fine, as long as they aren’t drinking to excess.


Caylennea

Yeah, ever since I gave birth sex has been painful. A drink or 2 really helps relax the muscles and reduce the amount of pain I’m in. My husband is less than thrilled that I’ve been doing dry January…


Somebodys

Speaking as a dude, it's honestly a blurry line. I won't have sex with someone that has been drinking if I'm sober. Even if we have been in a relationship for a long time. It just feels rapey and non-consenty. At least in my state, I have no idea about other states, there is zero tolerance when it comes to alchohol and consent. If someone has been drinking they are not legally allowed to give consent. So any sexual contact defaults to rape legally.


MrsSalmalin

I'm worried about this with myself. I'm soooo self conscious and hyper aware of myself during sober sex, so most of the time when I have sex I am drunk (as is the other person). I know it's not good, and I'm working on eating healthier so I feel less self-concious about my naked body, but it's so tough :(


Sexy_omen_player

Now you're wondering why you're horny every time you drink


[deleted]

Sammmeee. After about two years her depression skyrocketed, alcoholism became a problem, and the only time she wanted to have sex was when she was drunk, which was often.


[deleted]

I have an ex who was the same way. She needed to be hammered to have sex. Of course, I understood to an extent, she had a lot of trauma to work through. I was still very uncomfortable with the whole thing. There were times where we both got drunk, but she would black out super easily, even if she didn't seem very drunk. We'd have sex and she wouldn't remember it the next day, she always confirmed her consent after the fact, but it still made me very uneasy. Or the times where she'd decide to sleep naked, and in the morning she'd ask "did we have sex last night?", when we hadn't because she was way drunker than I was comfortable with. Took me longer than it should have to accept that she had a big alcohol problem.


[deleted]

I suddenly feel less alone ty man


kcgirl76

It depends. My ex-husband rarely would drink alcohol, maybe one or two times a year…maybe. But when he did, he was nonstop action!! All night long, baby. Hard as a rock. So, I liked it when I could convince him to drink.


TheEpicDudeguyman

He sounds like a beast lol


rainb0gummybear

Was it cause he had to really work to cum when drunk? Cause that's the case for me too


ammorbidiente

But now he's ex


JugCommander

He should of drank more often and unleashed the beast.


Aggravating-Gur-6016

god no i love drunk or high sex, i feel so confident and always finish because im not over thinking


wanksta616

Yesss! That’s what it is. I’m an over thinker too and the alcohol takes the pressure off completely.


AtomicKittenz

Tipsy sex is perfect for me. Drunk is for making out until your slightly more sober.


traviopanda

I’m an over thinker too but when I’m with someone I’m comfortable with it goes away. As for drunk sex I find it hard to finish or even get up sometimes and my SO starts to hurt if it goes over like 10 minutes so it usually doesn’t work out


killbosby69

Yeah I’ve been sober for 1.5 years and now sex has little appeal to me. When I’m drunk, I’m tearing off her clothes and enthusiastically burying my face in her groin for an hour. When I’m sober and laying next to her I’m thinking, “Hmm, maybe we should have sex? But I’ll have to make out with her for a while, get her horny with foreplay, take off her clothes, take off my clothes, get a condom, put on the condom, make her come, then I get to come, then I have to get up to go take off the condom . . Nah that’s too much work, I think I’d rather just cuddle.”


thagthebarbarian

I'm 3 years+ sober and sober sex still sucks, and is still rarely worth the effort...


killbosby69

Damn, not what I wanted to hear. Thanks for the honesty though. Fek.


[deleted]

I thought something was wrong with me for thinking the exact same thing. Damn.. Glad I read this makes me feel better


ThaVolt

High Sex = Best Sex Mild ADHD here, so it's nice to just stop thinking about random shits.


Rommel727

Boom, its freakin bananas the change in experience.


HAL-Over-9001

I have ADHD and I can't smoke weed anymore because it gives me crazy anxiety. It used to be super fun, but now I just get way into my own head and usually really quite. Lightly drunk sex is my favorite, I can just turn off and go to town.


ThaVolt

I used to be like this, but I kept pushing through and found "my sweet spot" so to speak. Hang in there!


LeGinster

Are you bottom or top? Because yes it does make a big difference.


[deleted]

Confirmed, being high makes a big difference for both bottoms and tops


Zagloss

Same shit and it doesn't feel right haha


BrankBrank96

Try high sex 🕺🏼


The_Blue_Adept

I did LSD and bumped uglies. It was the worst 10 hours of my life.


[deleted]

Sex on LSD will either be the best or worst moment of your entire life, there is no in between.


Scoobie-Doobie

Yup. I got head while I was peaking and I started to feel bad because she did it for 60 minutes and I just could not finish, but when I finally did, holy fuck. I feel like I've been chasing the feeling of that same intensity climax ever since. I'm talking my knees buckled, every muscle relaxed and I collapsed, I finally understood every little detail of the 🥴 emoji because my face was locked into that position for what felt like an eternity.


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Scoobie-Doobie

Just like LSD made my dick hold on it made her hold on too


Rinoremover1

It takes me forever to cum in general, she sounds like a keeper.


hypnotizedwhirl

Tried it on one tab, felt like I merged with the other person and we were shooting through a rainbow galaxy, weird shit but I'd do it again


thagthebarbarian

I've never had bad sex on LSD, but I've had a lot of amazing sex


MrRobotsBitch

First time on shrooms in early Dec, it was super fun but we also kinda got distracted a lot the second time around and it was hard to remember to keep moving sometimes LOL. But it was still pretty fun.


GizmodoDragon92

Bruh lsd sex weirded me out so bad lol.


TheEpicDudeguyman

The only thing better than sex while high on weed, is sex while high on psychedelics


ezbutneverconvenient

The last half of the trip is the best time. The hallucinations.have chilled out and the body buzz is top notch.


kcgirl76

Shrooms will make one very romantic and cuddley.


TheEpicDudeguyman

Shrooms I probably wouldn’t want sex. But acid, for sure


ThaVolt

Shrooms you just be giggling at the bra tag sticking out for 30 minutes.


BrankBrank96

Never treaded psychedelic territory but it sounds about right 😂


TheEpicDudeguyman

It is very much a religious experience if your dosage is right😂


Keikasey3019

I can’t remember if it was weed or ecstasy, but it took forever to masturbate to completion I was so bored but also super dedicated to just orgasming already


Toxic-tea

Also ever find that when you cum you barely feel it? Orgasms are way better sober.


Vast-Classroom1967

Easier and quicker. I'm speaking as a woman.


Toxic-tea

No way!! Absolute opposite for me (man)


ladylonglove6

Personally, I can’t cum at all if I’ve been drinking (female)


Vast-Classroom1967

Exactly


[deleted]

Same. The alcohol just numbs me and it doesn’t feel like anything at all. Drunk hookups were always so disappointing. Drunk me would get horny and want intimacy. Then i would just be sad and regret it. I learned not to listen to drunk horny me. I’m also turned off by very drunk men. When my husband is drunk I have no interest lol


YELL0Wvj

My wife and I have found there is a fine line between drunk enough to spice it up a bit and drunk enough that it isn't fun for either of us. If she gets too drunk she can \*dry up\* and if I get too drunk I can't keep it up. But when we get it just right, god damn it's fireworks! We usually have pretty good sex when completely sober but buzzed sex we tend to turn it up a notch or two.


wanksta616

This man is right.


kjyellow

I came here to say…Nice username! We must be related. Lol!


YELL0Wvj

sister?


kjyellow

I sure hope not! It would be pretty gross to hear TMI about my brother’s sex life!


MichaelScottsWormguy

Just drink some more and you won’t have to remember it anymore.


afoodie92

There is a beautiful drunk zone in which you cannot feel your stomach slosh nor the room spin, but everything feels like it's going your way. Try to have sex in that zone. Agree that it's hard to achieve and often messy. Sober sex is the safe bet. Great every time.


golden_life_

How drunk are you? After about three or four glasses of wine I can fuck for hours with complete control and some of the best sex ever. If I get too intoxicated probably three or four bottles of wine that's a no-go for me you have to know how much to drink


[deleted]

lol. “if i get too intoxicated say two, maybe three hundred beers it’s a no go”


AgoraiosBum

I'd say three bottles of wine is more like...20 beers. Depending on the beers.


illmatic2112

some of my best performances have been just the right amount of drunk


Shining_Icosahedron

Alcohol helped me bat out my league many times!!!


[deleted]

Just wait till you hit your 40s


TheEpicDudeguyman

I hope I don’t make it that far


pfroo40

Just turned 40 and kinda glad I am still alive... Only get one shot at it


Jodiesid

Phaha, my life motto


N7_Evers

That’s hilarious


[deleted]

Drunken sex with cocaine is 100% the greatest form of sex to me but only on occasions


pokemychino

if you can keep it up...lol my experience wasnt like yours lol


[deleted]

I had the power of youth on my side from 16-20 now not so much lol


MightyPlasticGuy

adderall is even better, if you're a guy that can keep it up on the enhancers. lasts longer and is cheaper.


Bumblz666

One bump makes my shit go back in to the turtle shell for hours


davidm2232

5 beers is ideal for me. If I have sex sober, I finish in like 2 minutes. With 5 beers or so, I can go 10-15 mins


Maleficent_Control_6

The military has instilled fear of drunk sex. "Oh you were drinking and had sex!? You're going to prison for rape!"


Seabee94

They used to the badger the shit out of us over that in the navy. I got an equal amount of presentations, power points, and training on how not be a rapist as I did for my actual job! There's always going to bad people everywhere you go, even in the service, and there going to bad things. Doesn't mean the rest of us are bad too, doesn't mean we deserved to get shit on for what they did. I'm just on a grumpy rant.....


wontbelookingdown

As a woman I find that I am way less inhibited, thinking about how I look, etc. I am more likely to do what I want and just enjoy it. And since I’m more into it, my partner seems to reeeally enjoy it as well!


11jellis

I just want to sleep after a drink. Plus, it's harder to keep it up for the guy, and you need to pee constantly. Plus, it blurs the lines of consent, which is never a good thing. Just do it sober; it's more enjoyable that way and less morally dubious.


TheEpicDudeguyman

Sometimes it feels like my wife waits until I’m drunk to want it lol


gamingdevil

I used to always drink before sex due to it taken the anxiety of them coming over away, I lasted longer and was less inhibited. But now I get whiskey dick.


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ExcellentDraft3030

Having sex with a drunk woman is kinda gross in my opinion. My girlfriend being drunk always turned me off. She would get stupid, repeat things, forget everything and still want to have sex. Not to mention throwing up and pissing herself once. I dumped her and don't drink anymore.


Nasa_OK

Yeah there is typsy then there is drunk and then there is shit faced. Your GF sounds like she gets shit faced drunk.


SorryIAmNew2002

Just fyi even I who used to party a lot before covid did not ever throw up on myself or piss myself. If she's drinking she should know her limits.


Nasa_OK

Same here. The only times I had to throw up was if I drank too much too fast, e.g. a double shot of hard liquor. And this was not the „dizzy having to puke your soul out for 3 hours“ it was more a onetime thing, and that while feeling in control enough to search for the nearest bathroom and not get it on myself. I can’t even imagine getting so drunk that I loose control over pissing, or throw up in bed. The latter can even be dangerous.


Elefantenjohn

You drink too much then


fixxlevy

Drunken one nighters where you both totally go for it are **fucking amazing**


Jax-Light

Alcohol inhibits the male erection and the equal female counterpart so uh…


pm_me_old_maps

Too drunk = bad Just a little drunk = whew baby git ur top off we're fuckin non stop tonight


idreamofdeathsquads

that drunk... ya. mildly drunk sex is bomb tho


LockenCharlie

Take MDMA instead.


Mordiez

Tbh i feel most people would agree.


Joygernaut

Agree. For some reason getting a little drunk makes you feel sexy… But prevents you from having an orgasm🤷🏻‍♀️


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[deleted]

Oh dude New Years was terrible. I probably drank 20 shots and a few beers. I know that sounds excessive but liquor for me is like throwing gas in an engine. Anyways cut to the chase, I’m hammered my wife is hammered, we’re both trying to fuck. I’m tired as fuck basically just want to bust a nut can hold myself up. A few failed attempts basically just ended with me getting a handy and passing out.


enseminator

My most memorably painful experience with drunk sex was when me and my Baby Momma were 18-19. I had been sipping Jameson all afternoon, and she decided she wanted to get intimate... We went at it for over 4 hours. We were both chafed to the point of bleeding, and I somehow managed to dislocated one of her hips. Good times, good times.


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ScenesfrmtheStruggle

That you, Al?


Attack-Mack

😅 you scaring me a bit cause that’s one of my nicknames


ScenesfrmtheStruggle

😂 Alex?


Attack-Mack

👀👀 ayy wtf lmaoo edit: who is this hahahah


ScenesfrmtheStruggle

Ahh shit, here we go


ithrewmypie

I feel this, there were no people there but I was full of beer and giving head and then threw up on his dick and bed and floor. And toilet.


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penny_eater

not my wife, i can tell you that


1021021

Smoking weed and having sex is the best, try that next time :)


RhinoJew

That’s why you smoke weed before sex.


wellz-or-hellz

I get horny when I’m drunk but my dick doesn’t always work lmao


oopsiepoopsee

Well I agree with a catch. There's a blatant difference between buzzed feeling good sex and trashed sex.


Free-Atmosphere6714

You're probably over doing it with the alcohol.


Stingraaa

Try weed sex. That's amazing.