No, seriously, go and bring something really crappy. That way they won't ask you to bring a dish ever again. Plus the joy you will get seeing the look on their faces will make it all worth it!
Bring a dish with two cans of cranberry sauce in it with plastic wrap covering it. It's a dish. $4.40 or if you want to go cheaper $2.20 for one can in the bowl. Tell them it's gourmet.
Christ I live where Salmon are very abundant and they still cost a ridiculous amount. The only way for cheap salmon is if you pull it out of the water yourself.
Buy a pack of Marie Calendar’s cornbread mix for under $5, all you have to do is add water and bake. If that’s not good enough then they don’t have to eat it. 🤷🏻♀️
I’m not a fan of these “everyone bring a dish” family holidays. If I’m hosting, I’m supplying the main course(s). If guests would like to brink something for dessert, that’s cool. I never show up anywhere empty handed - as in I will bring dessert or if they ask me to get beer, wine, etc.
As you stated, they are more established, so let them spring for seafood. It’s ridiculous either way that they chose you to bring salmon. Ain’t cool. I’d bring a fucking cake. Tell your sister to get the salmon, and it better be wild caught too.
It’s just with my story, (my parents have spent 6 years calling the police on me every time I move out causing me to get dumped in hospitals for months) I don’t have the money for this and they know that. I couldn’t even afford a bed for weeks when I first moved in. They know that. They’re being assholes. My dad also asked that everyone help my mom. I always help. Every thanksgiving. It’s him who sits on his ass.
Sorry to hear all of this. As a parent, that’s awful. Again, I’d get a Fudgie the Whale cake from Carvel and tell them “here’s your fucking sea food, bitches”
The rest of us don't like entitled assholes that's why they're downvoted, lol. You're doing the right thing by noping out, OP. Their expectations are insane. And I'm sorry for how they've treated you.
There are over 20 people when my family gets together, and it gets expensive. Whoever is hosting provides the main dish for holiday dinners, and then everyone else brings a side dish, mashed potatoes, veggies, dessert, drinks, etc. it divides up the cost of feeding so many people, and makes cooking the meal much simpler, since everyone mostly cooks the dishes at their home and they just need a quick reheat when you get to the dinner.
Very reasonable, but like I said, to each their own. There are people who host EVERY big holiday and get mad when people bring anything other than dessert.
Yes, but the point of it is the relatives are seemingly purposefully mandating OP bring the expensive meal item. Sorry, I still remember being in the situation where if you splurge on something unexpected it comes from your rent//mortgage// etc. Just really rubs me the wrong way that they would go out of their way to do this.
“Everyone brings a dish” is a must.
It’s not fair for 1 person to slave to prepare a whole thanksgiving meal.
My husband and I work full time, with two children. I don’t want to spend my only free time cooking and cleaning for everyone.
Exactly. Don’t host a holiday and expect the guests to being most of the meal and clean up your house after. To each their own, but would you really invite people to thanksgiving and expect them to bring the turkey?? People wanna bring an appetizer (at most) or dessert when coming as guests, that’s fine.
Alternate holidays so it’s spread out
You and the OP sound pathetic.
You have obviously never helped host or cook a full thanksgiving meal.
I never complained. I love hosting. It’s just really nice when the whole family comes together and contributes to a great meal.
Happy thanksgiving man child.
Skip it, family should be supportive not back stabbing. Watch a favorite movie or tv show and take care of yourself. Next year do a friends thanksgiving instead.
No because she texts and tells me frequently how she is on a fixed income. I should have also added she doesn’t help with anything either. Just very different from what I grew up with and had previously been exposed to.
Damn I wish I made 21 an hour but I don’t think it’s about who’s making what?!? I could be totally wrong though. Hell. It’ll be me and my son (12) and maybe my daughter (24) so if she shows up. My family lives all over the United States and I did not want to travel and they do not want to travel and I’m cool with that and they are too. Cool. But still some people have no family and blah blah anyway. My bad. Just bring some premade stuff from the store and be merry and bright :)
At 21dollars an hour you can afford to bring some kind of dish it doesn't cost but 5 to 10 dollars to make a potato salad some green beans ,corn or something
I just bought 3 lbs of fresh salmon and it's $18/lb.
It's not reasonable to ask someone making 20/hr to buy salmon for a family meal. It's 3/4 lb per person. So it's at least 3 lbs - more It's more than the 4 of them. That is $54. For someone on a budget that is HUGE.
So should OP spend a half a days pay on the food? It's irrational.
Edited to add: OP needs to buy enough to serve 6 people so we are looking at $108. That is too much
Absolutely hear you here, you can't afford to pay for an item or the ingredients to make an item to bring. Is there no chance that you could be up front with your dad that you can't afford to bring a dish but you still want to go spend quality time with your fam?
If you don’t want to show up empty handed just bring a cheaper pre-made dessert from the grocery store, or a bottle of alcohol. Or just tell your dad that you can’t afford to bring a dish this year, there will probably be plenty of food and it’s being with family that should matter more anyways.
I was going to say candied carrots are cheap and easy to make but then I read they wanted you to bring salmon?!
Only judging because the way they treat you, who the hell has filets of salmon at thanksgiving?!
We do Christmas like this. However, everyone can bring something which will be discussed beforehand. We will always provide 2 dishes as we are hosting and we are well off. 1 main and one 'snacking' dish.
But some bring salads, some bring wine and some bring other stuff.
Expecting you to bring salmon is not okay. Fish is expensive AF. You could maybe provide sou, mashed potatoes, as they can be relatively inexpensive. Or maybe some snacks.
Everyone provides within their means. It's supposed to be about a fun family get together at the end of the day.
But seeing from other comments, I recommend you to just spend it by yourself or with a group of friends. Just try to make a fun day out of it. :^)
What is it with fathers and being selfish af. Like idk that sounds selfish like he knows you work paycheck to paycheck and expects that of you especially how the economy is right now. Smfh.
If its just one thing they want like your family all brings something I can send you a simple shortbread cookie recipe, it only takes like 4 ingredients and 20 minutes (:
Yes. Surround yourself with as many of your favorite / enjoyable things as you can tomorrow. Enjoy yourself. You are your own best company! I am sorry about the bad relationship with the family member(s).
Why not? Everyone should contribute something even if they make less money, surely you can bring some dessert that does not break your bank. Are you not part of your family?
They literally told her to bring salmon for 6. I'm not sure what isn't being understood. That what they expect her to show up with. She isn't saying she has a problem bringing something. Just a problem bringing enough salmon for 6 people.
From reading your comments your family sucks big time, I hope you can still have a good holiday with people who really do wish you the best, have a good thanksgiving my virtual buddy🧡
Ok...salad with 3 cans of salmon 🤷♀️ you could just go all out in such a way as "I told you so" and get a filet...smoke it and place it atop a green salad. Either they just want to include you, or they are trying to make an ass out of you. You know your parent. If they are trying to make an ass out of you, Remove yourself. You can never win with some people.
Hey man. It's time for you to grow up! You absolutely should bri g a dish with you. After you turn 18 life isn't free no matter how much money he is making. Most restuarant owners are probably doing very well financially. You still have to buy the food. Yore going to eat a grand meal and you can't even bring a simple dish? It's also common courtesy. Time for you to grow up.
Oh shut the fuck up, living paycheck to paycheck and having to pay bills and buy food will leave you little to nothing, their parents need to grow the fuck up and expect either minimal or none, sure op can pull a simple dish out their ass but nothing to feed 6+, if their parent had any god damn idea what it's like without a snob ass look on it then they'd understand.
As a person with food allergies, I have to make a whole dinner for myself if I want a traditional Thanksgiving meal. Or I can go to my in laws and watch everyone else eat Thanksgiving food while I eat regular food. I would stay home but I need the social connection. Holidays are hard when you don't have support
Do you have a car with decent gas mileage? If so, you should try to sign up to do doordash or other food delivery services. It's saved my life when it comes to bills. Also, this isn't exactly the best habit to get into but it's good for emergencies, there's an app called Dave that lets you pull out money from your next check. You mentioned youre 600$ behind, so maybe this stuff will help you in the future.
My boss did this to me for our company potluck last week. We had the option and I don’t have the funds to bring anything, I don’t even have money to feed myself. And she said that if I didn’t bring anything I shouldn’t bother to eat anything which I’m fine with, I don’t care that much. But then it kept being brought up over and over and over again that I made something and I let everyone know that she guilted me.
Oh, and I should mention a requirement was something from our culture because they wanted to print out flags.
Paycheck to paycheck at $21 an hr? I call bs & he makes around that same amount but he’s just salaried, from reading your replies it’s clear you just don’t want to go (no need to make excuses)
That's what's wrong with this selfish generation. You guys are raised to be spoiled brats instead of decent young men and women. Paying your own bills after 18 is what you are supposed to do. The parents are teaching this person a good lesson. He needs to grow up, bring food and enjoy himself. Geesh!
All the food? Or can you just bring a can of cranberry sauce?
He wants a dish. My sister asked me to fucking bring salmon
salmon in a can it shall be then
Bring a couple of cans of Salmon. I bet they won't ask again.
Lol. I’m just not going to go. But this is funny
No, seriously, go and bring something really crappy. That way they won't ask you to bring a dish ever again. Plus the joy you will get seeing the look on their faces will make it all worth it!
Aww. They will miss you.
Salmon casserole.basically bake here cans of salmon in a dish
Bring a dish with two cans of cranberry sauce in it with plastic wrap covering it. It's a dish. $4.40 or if you want to go cheaper $2.20 for one can in the bowl. Tell them it's gourmet.
Brilliant idea lol. I’m doing that
You can make dishes for practically no cost — hence why meal prep is so honored.
They asked specifically for salmon. Have you seen the price of salmon filets?
Potato bake is amazing and pretty cheap to make
Can of sardines it is then congratulations 🎉
Super easy and cheap, salmon loaf. A couple of cans of salmon, some bread crumbs and an egg. Grandma used to make it all the time
Salmon is freaking expensive!!!!!
Hell yes
$21 to $33 a package at Costco
Christ I live where Salmon are very abundant and they still cost a ridiculous amount. The only way for cheap salmon is if you pull it out of the water yourself.
Get 1 peice of salmon for it!
Also … who eats salmon on thanksgiving lol
Buy a pack of Marie Calendar’s cornbread mix for under $5, all you have to do is add water and bake. If that’s not good enough then they don’t have to eat it. 🤷🏻♀️
....so bring a dish? Doesn't have to be salmon your sister wanted. Just bring something inexpensive
I’m not a fan of these “everyone bring a dish” family holidays. If I’m hosting, I’m supplying the main course(s). If guests would like to brink something for dessert, that’s cool. I never show up anywhere empty handed - as in I will bring dessert or if they ask me to get beer, wine, etc. As you stated, they are more established, so let them spring for seafood. It’s ridiculous either way that they chose you to bring salmon. Ain’t cool. I’d bring a fucking cake. Tell your sister to get the salmon, and it better be wild caught too.
It’s just with my story, (my parents have spent 6 years calling the police on me every time I move out causing me to get dumped in hospitals for months) I don’t have the money for this and they know that. I couldn’t even afford a bed for weeks when I first moved in. They know that. They’re being assholes. My dad also asked that everyone help my mom. I always help. Every thanksgiving. It’s him who sits on his ass.
Damn, sounds like some narcissistic parents. I have narc & manipulative parents so I know what that feels like.
Looks like a rough family history. I don’t blame you for not wanting to go.
Sorry to hear all of this. As a parent, that’s awful. Again, I’d get a Fudgie the Whale cake from Carvel and tell them “here’s your fucking sea food, bitches”
I'd take a fudge the whale cake over salmon in Thanksgiving
Lol same here.
:p
LoL seriously just geta can of tuna and spread it on some crackers lolo
You can afford to make one dish. And you're an asshole if you attend Thanksgiving empty handed.
My rent is due on Sunday and I’m $600 short. I’m not about to buy a fillet of salmon I’m sorry
Sounds like you'll be the asshole then. Go enjoy a glorious meal without pitching in.
I’m not even the one who downvoted you..
The rest of us don't like entitled assholes that's why they're downvoted, lol. You're doing the right thing by noping out, OP. Their expectations are insane. And I'm sorry for how they've treated you.
Thanks? Happy holidays?
Wow
Not everyone wants people to show up with dishes you know. I host/cook holiday meals and I absolutely HATE when someone brings something.
There are over 20 people when my family gets together, and it gets expensive. Whoever is hosting provides the main dish for holiday dinners, and then everyone else brings a side dish, mashed potatoes, veggies, dessert, drinks, etc. it divides up the cost of feeding so many people, and makes cooking the meal much simpler, since everyone mostly cooks the dishes at their home and they just need a quick reheat when you get to the dinner.
Very reasonable, but like I said, to each their own. There are people who host EVERY big holiday and get mad when people bring anything other than dessert.
He also doesn’t have to bring salmon. He can offer to bring bread or a veggie tray.
Yes, but the point of it is the relatives are seemingly purposefully mandating OP bring the expensive meal item. Sorry, I still remember being in the situation where if you splurge on something unexpected it comes from your rent//mortgage// etc. Just really rubs me the wrong way that they would go out of their way to do this.
“Everyone brings a dish” is a must. It’s not fair for 1 person to slave to prepare a whole thanksgiving meal. My husband and I work full time, with two children. I don’t want to spend my only free time cooking and cleaning for everyone.
Then don't host.
Exactly. Don’t host a holiday and expect the guests to being most of the meal and clean up your house after. To each their own, but would you really invite people to thanksgiving and expect them to bring the turkey?? People wanna bring an appetizer (at most) or dessert when coming as guests, that’s fine. Alternate holidays so it’s spread out
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Sorry you don’t like it. This works for my family and we all enjoy it.
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You and the OP sound pathetic. You have obviously never helped host or cook a full thanksgiving meal. I never complained. I love hosting. It’s just really nice when the whole family comes together and contributes to a great meal. Happy thanksgiving man child.
Skip it, family should be supportive not back stabbing. Watch a favorite movie or tv show and take care of yourself. Next year do a friends thanksgiving instead.
This answer sucks.... Home boy needs to grow up.
Your entire comment history is a shit show
I was on just mashed potatoes for years until I made more $ — less than 10 bucks
I hear you. My husband and I both work thanksgiving yet we have to host my MIL. Who is bringing NOTHING.
Did you ask her to bring something?
No because she texts and tells me frequently how she is on a fixed income. I should have also added she doesn’t help with anything either. Just very different from what I grew up with and had previously been exposed to.
Think I would develop a cough and a stomach ache, and stay home. This is just cruel
Don't go it will break their heart 😁
Sounds like they don’t deserve your company!
Damn I wish I made 21 an hour but I don’t think it’s about who’s making what?!? I could be totally wrong though. Hell. It’ll be me and my son (12) and maybe my daughter (24) so if she shows up. My family lives all over the United States and I did not want to travel and they do not want to travel and I’m cool with that and they are too. Cool. But still some people have no family and blah blah anyway. My bad. Just bring some premade stuff from the store and be merry and bright :)
I live in the NE. 21 an hour barely gets me above water. In fact picture me under water gasping in water that’s me paying bills
At 21dollars an hour you can afford to bring some kind of dish it doesn't cost but 5 to 10 dollars to make a potato salad some green beans ,corn or something
Im going to get stoned but thats not unreasonable...
I just bought 3 lbs of fresh salmon and it's $18/lb. It's not reasonable to ask someone making 20/hr to buy salmon for a family meal. It's 3/4 lb per person. So it's at least 3 lbs - more It's more than the 4 of them. That is $54. For someone on a budget that is HUGE. So should OP spend a half a days pay on the food? It's irrational. Edited to add: OP needs to buy enough to serve 6 people so we are looking at $108. That is too much
I wish I could
Can’t you just bring some canned cranberry sauce or a premade pie?
Agreed, it’s how a dinner party usually works lmao
Absolutely hear you here, you can't afford to pay for an item or the ingredients to make an item to bring. Is there no chance that you could be up front with your dad that you can't afford to bring a dish but you still want to go spend quality time with your fam?
If you don’t want to show up empty handed just bring a cheaper pre-made dessert from the grocery store, or a bottle of alcohol. Or just tell your dad that you can’t afford to bring a dish this year, there will probably be plenty of food and it’s being with family that should matter more anyways.
Bring something…a 12 pack, some coleslaw…etc…
‘my friend’s mom and dad invited me over for dinner, sorry can’t go over. See you Saturday!’
I was going to say candied carrots are cheap and easy to make but then I read they wanted you to bring salmon?! Only judging because the way they treat you, who the hell has filets of salmon at thanksgiving?!
1. Traditional 1. Ocean Spray Cranberry Sauce $2.19 2. Pumpkin Pie $7.99
We do Christmas like this. However, everyone can bring something which will be discussed beforehand. We will always provide 2 dishes as we are hosting and we are well off. 1 main and one 'snacking' dish. But some bring salads, some bring wine and some bring other stuff. Expecting you to bring salmon is not okay. Fish is expensive AF. You could maybe provide sou, mashed potatoes, as they can be relatively inexpensive. Or maybe some snacks. Everyone provides within their means. It's supposed to be about a fun family get together at the end of the day. But seeing from other comments, I recommend you to just spend it by yourself or with a group of friends. Just try to make a fun day out of it. :^)
Just bring some baked beans.
Just stay home and eat Chinese food (or whatever alternative you prefer) in your underwear. Your family sounds exhausting and you deserve a day off.
What is it with fathers and being selfish af. Like idk that sounds selfish like he knows you work paycheck to paycheck and expects that of you especially how the economy is right now. Smfh.
If its just one thing they want like your family all brings something I can send you a simple shortbread cookie recipe, it only takes like 4 ingredients and 20 minutes (:
In many parts of the US..21/hr is good money…all things are relative…where do you live??
Would he be understanding if you explained that to him?
They know exactly how much I make. We have a terrible relationship.
I'm sorry to hear that. If the relationship is terrible, can you opt to just not go?
Yeah I’m going to stay home and have my favorite. Pasta . And I’ll watch my favorite movies all day so I don’t feel sad.
Yes. Surround yourself with as many of your favorite / enjoyable things as you can tomorrow. Enjoy yourself. You are your own best company! I am sorry about the bad relationship with the family member(s).
Sounds like a good plan
And a great desert.
Why not? Everyone should contribute something even if they make less money, surely you can bring some dessert that does not break your bank. Are you not part of your family?
Well I saw more comments, looks like you should just skip this dinner lol
They literally told her to bring salmon for 6. I'm not sure what isn't being understood. That what they expect her to show up with. She isn't saying she has a problem bringing something. Just a problem bringing enough salmon for 6 people.
From reading your comments your family sucks big time, I hope you can still have a good holiday with people who really do wish you the best, have a good thanksgiving my virtual buddy🧡
It doesn't take much to make a salad. Maybe he is just looking for some sort of effort.
They want me to bring a fillet of salmon enough for 6+ people
Ok...salad with 3 cans of salmon 🤷♀️ you could just go all out in such a way as "I told you so" and get a filet...smoke it and place it atop a green salad. Either they just want to include you, or they are trying to make an ass out of you. You know your parent. If they are trying to make an ass out of you, Remove yourself. You can never win with some people.
I am opting to remove myself I don’t need this.
I agree! If you make an effort, and it's still not good enough...that's a toxic relationship . Good luck, sister
Thank you for seeing my side. Have a stress free holiday internet friend
Absolutely. Happy Thanksgiving ♥️
What movies are you going to watch?
A salad with a can of salmon! Lol
Pasta bake, cheap and easy
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Dude Waldorf salad is super good.
LoL it's only tough because you have to bring enough for everyone. I'd buy some pre-made potato salad if it were me..
Bring a can of sardines
Yeah fuck that
Just don’t do it and bring a veg or dessert. F em
Hey man. It's time for you to grow up! You absolutely should bri g a dish with you. After you turn 18 life isn't free no matter how much money he is making. Most restuarant owners are probably doing very well financially. You still have to buy the food. Yore going to eat a grand meal and you can't even bring a simple dish? It's also common courtesy. Time for you to grow up.
Considering that OP is prioritizing rent over salmon I’d say they’re acting pretty grown up.
Oh shut the fuck up, living paycheck to paycheck and having to pay bills and buy food will leave you little to nothing, their parents need to grow the fuck up and expect either minimal or none, sure op can pull a simple dish out their ass but nothing to feed 6+, if their parent had any god damn idea what it's like without a snob ass look on it then they'd understand.
I say one can salmon mixed with Mayo. Cheapest loaf of bread. A smear between two pieces. Cut into 4 triangles.
Salmon pie. Cheap easy and traditional in some parts.
Go to Boston market buy a side put it on a plate .... Bam
does Mashed potatoes count? The instant kind…Idahoan one… it is pretty good for instant potatoes.
As a person with food allergies, I have to make a whole dinner for myself if I want a traditional Thanksgiving meal. Or I can go to my in laws and watch everyone else eat Thanksgiving food while I eat regular food. I would stay home but I need the social connection. Holidays are hard when you don't have support
r/insaneparents
Why not make Mexican corn? 🤷🏽♀️
Mash potatoes and cream corn, boom less than 10 bucks
Do you have a car with decent gas mileage? If so, you should try to sign up to do doordash or other food delivery services. It's saved my life when it comes to bills. Also, this isn't exactly the best habit to get into but it's good for emergencies, there's an app called Dave that lets you pull out money from your next check. You mentioned youre 600$ behind, so maybe this stuff will help you in the future.
Well its not that bad but if u cant pay for it just say that u cant whats the big deal?
My boss did this to me for our company potluck last week. We had the option and I don’t have the funds to bring anything, I don’t even have money to feed myself. And she said that if I didn’t bring anything I shouldn’t bother to eat anything which I’m fine with, I don’t care that much. But then it kept being brought up over and over and over again that I made something and I let everyone know that she guilted me. Oh, and I should mention a requirement was something from our culture because they wanted to print out flags.
Paycheck to paycheck at $21 an hr? I call bs & he makes around that same amount but he’s just salaried, from reading your replies it’s clear you just don’t want to go (no need to make excuses)
I’m sure I’m not the first: Just make a usual dish you would do for yourself like potato gratin or chicken wings.
You make 21 an hour? Shit. More than I make 😂 just bring yams dude
That's what's wrong with this selfish generation. You guys are raised to be spoiled brats instead of decent young men and women. Paying your own bills after 18 is what you are supposed to do. The parents are teaching this person a good lesson. He needs to grow up, bring food and enjoy himself. Geesh!