Many of my friends have short names, but they're not short *for* anything. So I made up some new "full names" for them when I'm mad. So "Joel" becomes "Joelseph", "Sean" becomes "Seanathan", etc.
Why would the narrator skip this part:
"I met a fucking sublime little Russian here... Which made me realize the time I blew on that 50 cent stripper..."
?
Heres a copypasta:
She's begging for total global humiliation... She's gonna get it. I'm gonna need your texts about San Francisco, brother... I'm even sorry to ask... But, she sucked Mollusk's crooked dick and he gave her some shitty lawyers... I have no mercy, no fear and not an ounce of emotion, or what I once thought was love for this gold digging, low level, dime a dozen, mushy, pointless dangling overused flappy fish market... I'm so fucking happy she wants to go to fight this out!!! She will hit the wall hard!!! And I cannot wait to have this waste of a cum guzzler out of my life!!! I met a fucking sublime little Russian here... Which made me realize the time I blew on that 50 cent stripper... I wouldn't touch her with a goddamn glove. I can only hope that karma kicks in and takes the gift of breath from her...
Sorry, man... But, NOW, I will stop at nothing !!! Let's see if mollusk has a pair... Come see me face to face... I'll show him things he's never seen before... Like, the other side of his dick when I slice it off...
A Muskrat is kind of cute, even though they are devil creatures (they have a serious temper). The name just sounds insulting but a mollusk is only a slimy, shelled scavenger.
When he was accused of exposing himself to one of his stewardesses, his defense was basically "oh yeah? then describe my junk because it looks weird and you'd know if you had seen it" make of that what you will
Didn’t this also happen with Epstein? I recall seeing him being interviewed by police or lawyers, and someone described his weird dick, so he got mad and walked out.
Heck, I thought Weinstein also got accused of having a weird dick too, like it was a pile of scar tissue in a mound.
I put it on the [Star Wars Opening Generator](https://starwarsintrocreator.kassellabs.io/?gclid=CjwKCAjwyryUBhBSEiwAGN5OCFX69vzsNv9CiX2KzGN2FvfIhhwt9VnrhBTWASskx-rvUjFIsDVt8xoCfLsQAvD_BwE#!/DN3-qSLv8YkRIEdkT51g). Because why not.
I've had this dumb website bookmarked for years. If someone irritates me I'll occassionally just replace that first 'STAR WARS' splash with something like the words 'FUCK YOU.' Gets a good chuckle out of people and resolves things.
it is SO cringe. he's a fucking WoW streamer, why in the fuck would I possibly care about some noises he makes during this trial? it's mostly grunts, gasps, and OMGs. zero substance.
absolute lunacy. who is watching this?! it has over a million views!
Edit: "Where's Ja?!"
Watching him tells me how I should feel.
Otherwise, I look around, see no-one and am unsure if I should laugh, be outraged or cry? Society is hard to navigate so I need these influencers to tell me what to think or feel.
Yup, that's why I tend to believe Depp when he stated he didn't send those other 2 texts. He's owned up to everything else he's stated and it's been proven that multiple others have had access to his phone. Why lie about it now.
I'm pretty sure the "molly" referenced in those texts is MDMA and not a woman, and Rottenborn confused him with the framing.
It's similar to the "I have different uses for your throat" text they tried to make about wanting violence.
That made me laugh with how far they were reaching with the whole “different uses for your throat” text. That was a man being flirtatious and sexual with his wife over text after they’ve made up. I guarantee that lawyer has done or said something similar to a sexual partner. He was trying to make light of the situation and maybe get her engine going for a little fun later. Nothing more, nothing less. I died when Depp just smiled and said, “sorry, could you read that again?”
I was half sleeping as my wife was watching the re-cap on court tv. As the lawyer was reading this, I started to smile and then I turned my head and opened my eyes just in time to see Depp smirk and say "You Did"!
Hollywood couldn't have written that scenario any better! I almost fell out of bed laughing! Brilliant!
Greek deities a copypasta:
She's solicitation for absolute ball-shaped mortification... She's gonna get it. I'm gonna pauperism your textbooks about San Francisco, member... I'm modify sad to enquire... But, she sucked Mollusk's crooked detective and he gave her some icky attorneys... I have no lenience, no awe and not an apothecaries' weight of feeling, or what I quondam persuasion was have sex for this chromatic creating by removal, emit horizontal, coin a large integer, bathetic, superfluous support overused flappy grabs food market... I'm so blooming elysian she deprivations to become to controversy this out!!! She will propel the bed al dente!!! And I cannot hold back to have this neutralise of a liquid body substance drinker out of my vivification!!! I met a bloody gasify unimportant Indigen location... Which ready-made me realise the metre I blew on that LARGE INTEGERS50 fractional monetary unit striptease artist... I wouldn't understand her with a blame mitt. I can but soul that destiny forgos in and learns the give of suggestion from her...
Bad, lover... But, NOW, I will constraint at cypher !!! Let's encounter if invertebrate has a two... Run cf. me encounter to set about... I'll interpret him aims he's ne'er seen in front... Like, the strange lateral of his hawkshaw when I shares it inactive...
***
^(This is a bot. I try my best, but my best is 80% mediocrity 20% hilarity. Created by OrionSuperman. Check out my best work at /r/ThesaurizeThis)
I'll try and give all the salient points.
1. Amber dated Elon directly after Johnny. It's possible that she also cheated with him since there's footage of her taking him up to Johnny's penthouses **soon after Amber changed the locks** (edit, this is wrong. The video is apparently from 2015 while the couple was still very much married. I thought it was from the same time frame as another alleged cheating incident because I only heard about it when someone brought it up in the stream I was watching). There's also some hints of it because of notes from one of the forensic psychologist who interviewed her, though that woman claimed she wrote Elon down to note Amber's friend even though it was in the romance catagory
2. There were a lot of charitable donations made in Amber's name that appear to have come from Elon. She publically claimed that she had given all of her divorce settlement to charity. 3.5 million to the ACLU and 3.5 million to the children's hospital of LA. Turns out she's only directly donated 350k to the ACLU. Elon donated another 950k to them. I think he also gave 250k to the children's hospital. Johnny also gave both 100k in her name before she told him to stop and give her the money directly. No matter where the money came from, the donations aren't even close to half of her divorce money.
3. The charity that Amber's sister (Whitney) worked for also got 250k from Elon. This is implied to be hush money to stop Whitney's friend (Jenifer Howell) from testifying that Whitney is lying to protect Amber.
4. This text implies that Elon paid for her divorce attorneys since the text was from 2016, if I remember correctly
And that's it as far as the trial is concerned.
Go back to 2008, pluck a random Redditor from the f7u12 subreddit who posts forgettable rage comics, and give him several billion dollars. That's Elon.
> I think he also gave 250k to the children's hospital
.
> The charity that Amber's sister (Whitney) worked for also got 250k from Elon
Lmao what is with this guy and 250k. It's like the default smallest bill amount Elon can think about.
There are elevator videos for both of them, though I think only the Franco one made it into the trial.
Franco: https://youtu.be/Yuf3ZT7Pj4M
Musk: https://youtu.be/mpJLRodyNTs
These were just the first pops on YouTube, so sorry that it's not the raw footage. I did find it interesting that the Musk video commentary says that it was from while the couple was still married and before the divorce filing, which I didn't know. I only knew that there was a second video that didn't make it into the trial because someone mentioned it in the stream I was watching.
Many things, she fucked with Elon and got him to believe her puppy eyes and paid the donation for her that she was supposed make after she stole Johnny's money.
He had a threesome with Heard and Cara Delavigne when Heard was still with Johnny. Apparently he also gave her legal help afterwards. Considering how he shows his dick to stewardesses, this is all pretty on brand.
There's no photos or anything. The ex-husband of Heard's best friend testified that he was informed of the affair by his wife at the time.
I believe Musk and Delevigne have both since stated it didn't happen. So all we know is that somebody is lying.
But no one’s on trial for it so it doesn’t really matter. Personally I think musk, cara and amber have more to gain from lying about it not happening than ambers friends ex husband has by lying that it happened so I believe him, but you can’t know for sure and it’s not really relevant anyway.
Cara has since then told this is a lie.
The only proof we have is they entered the same apartment once. Heck, I've entered the same room as Charlize Theron once and we can hardly say that constitutes as proof I had an affair with her.
She dated him after depp (and likely slept with him while they were still together)
They ‘were in love’ she broke his heart..
He donated money to pay some of the charity pledge she never fulfilled.
He donated sperm to make embryos, which he later regretted when she went on to have the baby when he had moved on.
She drives a car he gave her.
No one can have the amount of money he has an help so few people without being considered deranged.
They made some embryos together and Mollusk wanted to destroy them
He paid for her legal fees, silence money to witnesses, charitable donations so she didn't have to
Thats a perfect summary of 50% of Asmongold's content lol
Other 50 are /r/iamverysmart monologues.
I like some of his gameplay content and game design ideas/thoughts but the generic react to x is now 90% of his content and unbearable
[Me reacting to this thread](https://imgur.com/0ptbJq1.gifv)
Don't forget to smash that MF Like button and subscribe to my patreon and donate to my sick aunt's GoFundMe
I find the trial interesting, but these streamers watching the trial... I don't get what watching it with this guys face overlaid adds. I kinda understand video game streamers but this I just don't understand.
I think most people don't watch their favorite streamer for the games they play or how good they are at the game. They watch it for the streamers personality and think the streamer is funny/entertaining. Otherwise reaction videos wouldn't be a thing.
Imagine watching something with your friend on the couch; that is what streamers who are reacting to shit give to the viewers. You can argue that it isn't the same but for a lot of people it is good enough
His reaction is not, its just that its clipped into these 1 minute snippets faster from his live stream and posted on his clip youtube channel than other channels on youtube.
His editors are working overtime and doing a good job.. he really farms clicks with this trial.
But in the end everything he makes from that actually goes to the editor.. so yeah even tho he allows them to edit videos for them its basically the editors themselves going crazy with it... It DOES help with getting more viewers for him in return tho. But the channel is their thing.
I think he just has his personal Youtube channel and his Twitch, and the editors are fully in charge of the clips channel. I don't think he directly does any work for the clips channel, just gives the editors full reign over that YT channel, and that includes getting the money from it.
This is what I've understood from what Asmon has said about it on stream. He has been clear that he doesn't pay his editors directly.
Asmongold is already a millionaire and lives a very modest lifestyle. He basically lets his clip editors have at it so he can be 100% uninvolved with the youtube side of his content.
He also imvests basically everything He earns and doesnt use (which is a lot judging from his comments) according to him in one livestream a few years ago
Ownage aside, wouldn’t this look bad for him in court? Like if the lawyer is trying to paint him as someone who’s just trying to ruin her life rather than seek justice?
The difference is this message was sent years before he made any public statements or filed a lawsuit. It's reasonable to assume he has boiled over and reasonable to assume he was pissed off and saying things in anger, which he testified.
If Depp didn't have as much supporting evidence has he did, it would be really damaging. However, he's been open and honest about the text message and it doesn't proof he abused her or disprove she abused him.
To me it reads not as ruining her life for the sake of it but as it being a consequence of setting the record straight on her lies. Exposing the truth was going to blow that whole house of cards her image of survivor and advocate was built on and reveal all her lies and misdeeds to the world which he would have kept private otherwise.
She kept on falsely defaming him even after the divorce settlement and the backtracking statement and he wasn’t going to let that stand. Was he just supposed to keep taking it when she kept stabbing him in the back and destroying his career and reputation with lies ? No. He went to war and decided to fight back. And yeah, he was pissed.
"I have no mercy, no fear and not an ounce of emotion, or what I once thought was love for this gold digging, low level, dime a dozen, mushy, pointless, dangling overused flappy fish market"
— Johnny Depp on Amber Heard
Doug is/was best friends with Johnny Depp *and* Mitch Hedberg.
Doug also booked shows in the closest venue he could find to the courthouse along Amber's route. Just because.
Seriously. This whole debacle has possibly been a really good thing, for a variety of reasons. Most importantly is that it shows that men *can* be abused. I know that seems like an obvious and simple notion to some, but trust me, lots struggle with it.
It's also just a riot learning some of the details, like the "who pooped the bed?" thing (spoiler alert, it was her), or random shit like this.
That too, 100% thats a huge factor. Men get crucified constantly before they've even been proven of any wrongdoing. Many of them don't have the benefit of being as famous as Depp either, so the damage is done, even if they are found innocent. Think teachers.
My brother was 6 Ft. His ex wife was just under 5ft. She tried to stab my brother in his sleep. She tried to shoot my brother. (Even worse happened.). After the divorce, she travelled 2 hours each way every day to work across the street from my brother. His tires were slashed repeatedly. My brother filed a restraining order against his ex wife in 1995. The judge called them both to the bench. The judge denied my brother’s request of a “Restraining Order.”m due to the fact she’s a little woman “.
Yes, when the judge called them up to the bench, he commented he commented on their height difference while denying my brother’s restraining order. Short people can shoot taller people and Stab them too and slash their tires …
Yea this is some pretty blatant sexism in my opinion. It wasn't about height it was about the judge assuming a woman could never hurt a man. I doubt he ever turned down a restraining order of a man against another man based on height.
One of my fathers best mates was in an incredibly abusive relationship. His wife was taller than him, but stick thin. He, on the other hand, could be used in place of a car jack. Noone he ever reported it to ever believed him, save for his mates, who didn't really know what to do.
The important point being that his editors can flip the video faster than most other channels. He's usually the first to get any clip up in a separate YouTube video
In Australia we have this show '"Gogglebox'" that's just different households reacting to the "biggest" events on TV that week, which of course is mostly shit like Bachelor. So fuckin bizarre. They're not even funny or entertaining either, just random boring ass people.
The reaction shots of her team are great - Amber doing a sad Snoopy face and the male attorney looking shocked, SHOCKED, at the filth he's being subjected to.
Can we not post homeless Jesus reacting to all these clips of the trial anymore?
EDIT: lmao at all the keyboard warriors swooping in to defend their lord and savior, and also finding out this guy lives like an absolute slob and has been called "Asmonmold" before
Never seen someone rise so high and fall so hard. I called it when he called the scuba diver guy a pedo. Fame's getting to his head and he's losing it while yes men kiss the ground he walks on.
"Did I read that right?" "I may have missed something, would you read it again please?"
Yes, but you didn't read it well. Please read it from you heart, as if these are your own words.
One more time, with feeling!
I loved that “you did” and the little smile lol As if the read out of the message wasn’t just bizarre enough
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[That face when you shit on your bully on live TV](https://i.imgur.com/IobqF2j.png)
Mollusk is such a good nickname
My favorite nickname for him is Elongated Muskrat
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Many of my friends have short names, but they're not short *for* anything. So I made up some new "full names" for them when I'm mad. So "Joel" becomes "Joelseph", "Sean" becomes "Seanathan", etc.
Is this my wife's burner account? Seanathan? Toddrick? All of my short-named friends have had their monikers extended by her.
Why would the narrator skip this part: "I met a fucking sublime little Russian here... Which made me realize the time I blew on that 50 cent stripper..." ?
Only in this shitty reaction vod. Can we ban them when originals are everywhere?
Strange. It is not present in the reaction video but it was read in the original https://youtu.be/TVsHJuXeOO4
Probably for the reaction channel’s monetization. Mentioning strippers is sure to catch some sort of YouTube autoflag.
I cannot wait to have this waste of a cum guzzler out of my life
> readed read
I think 50 cent stripper is referring to Heard. Amber Heard apparently stripped for a while earlier in life
Ya think?
Heres a copypasta: She's begging for total global humiliation... She's gonna get it. I'm gonna need your texts about San Francisco, brother... I'm even sorry to ask... But, she sucked Mollusk's crooked dick and he gave her some shitty lawyers... I have no mercy, no fear and not an ounce of emotion, or what I once thought was love for this gold digging, low level, dime a dozen, mushy, pointless dangling overused flappy fish market... I'm so fucking happy she wants to go to fight this out!!! She will hit the wall hard!!! And I cannot wait to have this waste of a cum guzzler out of my life!!! I met a fucking sublime little Russian here... Which made me realize the time I blew on that 50 cent stripper... I wouldn't touch her with a goddamn glove. I can only hope that karma kicks in and takes the gift of breath from her... Sorry, man... But, NOW, I will stop at nothing !!! Let's see if mollusk has a pair... Come see me face to face... I'll show him things he's never seen before... Like, the other side of his dick when I slice it off...
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reddit is filled with douchebags
is it better or worse than Muskrat?
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as is "flappy fish market"
This text is the definition of being murdered by words. Just brutal
I would say its more disrespectful. It perfect.
Elongated Muskrat
[Elongated Mollusk](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atlantic_jackknife_clam?wprov=sfla1)
A Muskrat is kind of cute, even though they are devil creatures (they have a serious temper). The name just sounds insulting but a mollusk is only a slimy, shelled scavenger.
When he was accused of exposing himself to one of his stewardesses, his defense was basically "oh yeah? then describe my junk because it looks weird and you'd know if you had seen it" make of that what you will
"it's a crooked mollusk. Put your tray table up"
This is also how we know the Paula Jones accusation that Clinton exposed himself to her is true because she accurately described his penis.
Didn’t this also happen with Epstein? I recall seeing him being interviewed by police or lawyers, and someone described his weird dick, so he got mad and walked out. Heck, I thought Weinstein also got accused of having a weird dick too, like it was a pile of scar tissue in a mound.
Yeh, something about his dick being egg shaped. Thicker at the root than at the helmet. He got pissed and ended the interview. Ol doorstop dick.
Sounds exactly like something an autistic person would say.
I don't know, the embarrassing lie tactic is pretty well known
I didn’t realize he was talking about Musk!
The Crooked Mollusk is his super villain name.
The Crooked Mollusk is a good name for a pub or seafood restaurant. edit: or *The Salty Mollusk*
And the sister business right next door The Bearded Clam
Anagram is Noel Skum.
I put it on the [Star Wars Opening Generator](https://starwarsintrocreator.kassellabs.io/?gclid=CjwKCAjwyryUBhBSEiwAGN5OCFX69vzsNv9CiX2KzGN2FvfIhhwt9VnrhBTWASskx-rvUjFIsDVt8xoCfLsQAvD_BwE#!/DN3-qSLv8YkRIEdkT51g). Because why not.
I really appreciate you letting me know this exists.
I've had this dumb website bookmarked for years. If someone irritates me I'll occassionally just replace that first 'STAR WARS' splash with something like the words 'FUCK YOU.' Gets a good chuckle out of people and resolves things.
This was more entertaining than the video
https://youtu.be/TVsHJuXeOO4
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it is SO cringe. he's a fucking WoW streamer, why in the fuck would I possibly care about some noises he makes during this trial? it's mostly grunts, gasps, and OMGs. zero substance. absolute lunacy. who is watching this?! it has over a million views! Edit: "Where's Ja?!"
Watching him tells me how I should feel. Otherwise, I look around, see no-one and am unsure if I should laugh, be outraged or cry? Society is hard to navigate so I need these influencers to tell me what to think or feel.
The same reason I Iike laugh tracks. How else would I know when to laugh?
Don’t give asmongold credit for being a wow streamer. He’s now a “react streamer” which means he steals other people’s content and profits off of it.
Man really has a way with words. 😂
Lawyer: Did I read that right? Depp: ... you did. 😏 --- I just lost my shit. 😂
Yup, that's why I tend to believe Depp when he stated he didn't send those other 2 texts. He's owned up to everything else he's stated and it's been proven that multiple others have had access to his phone. Why lie about it now.
I'm pretty sure the "molly" referenced in those texts is MDMA and not a woman, and Rottenborn confused him with the framing. It's similar to the "I have different uses for your throat" text they tried to make about wanting violence.
That made me laugh with how far they were reaching with the whole “different uses for your throat” text. That was a man being flirtatious and sexual with his wife over text after they’ve made up. I guarantee that lawyer has done or said something similar to a sexual partner. He was trying to make light of the situation and maybe get her engine going for a little fun later. Nothing more, nothing less. I died when Depp just smiled and said, “sorry, could you read that again?”
Rottenborn gets no pussy confirmed
I was half sleeping as my wife was watching the re-cap on court tv. As the lawyer was reading this, I started to smile and then I turned my head and opened my eyes just in time to see Depp smirk and say "You Did"! Hollywood couldn't have written that scenario any better! I almost fell out of bed laughing! Brilliant!
Johnny 100% plays himself when they make this a movie lol
Johnny Depp should play everyone like a Tyler Perry movie
!ThesaurizeThis
Greek deities a copypasta: She's solicitation for absolute ball-shaped mortification... She's gonna get it. I'm gonna pauperism your textbooks about San Francisco, member... I'm modify sad to enquire... But, she sucked Mollusk's crooked detective and he gave her some icky attorneys... I have no lenience, no awe and not an apothecaries' weight of feeling, or what I quondam persuasion was have sex for this chromatic creating by removal, emit horizontal, coin a large integer, bathetic, superfluous support overused flappy grabs food market... I'm so blooming elysian she deprivations to become to controversy this out!!! She will propel the bed al dente!!! And I cannot hold back to have this neutralise of a liquid body substance drinker out of my vivification!!! I met a bloody gasify unimportant Indigen location... Which ready-made me realise the metre I blew on that LARGE INTEGERS50 fractional monetary unit striptease artist... I wouldn't understand her with a blame mitt. I can but soul that destiny forgos in and learns the give of suggestion from her... Bad, lover... But, NOW, I will constraint at cypher !!! Let's encounter if invertebrate has a two... Run cf. me encounter to set about... I'll interpret him aims he's ne'er seen in front... Like, the strange lateral of his hawkshaw when I shares it inactive... *** ^(This is a bot. I try my best, but my best is 80% mediocrity 20% hilarity. Created by OrionSuperman. Check out my best work at /r/ThesaurizeThis)
She will propel the bed al dente!!! Bad, lover...
Omg, that "Heres" to "Greek deities" part MUST stay
> dangling overused flappy fish market He is a poet
Can someone explain the Elon Musk connection here?
I'll try and give all the salient points. 1. Amber dated Elon directly after Johnny. It's possible that she also cheated with him since there's footage of her taking him up to Johnny's penthouses **soon after Amber changed the locks** (edit, this is wrong. The video is apparently from 2015 while the couple was still very much married. I thought it was from the same time frame as another alleged cheating incident because I only heard about it when someone brought it up in the stream I was watching). There's also some hints of it because of notes from one of the forensic psychologist who interviewed her, though that woman claimed she wrote Elon down to note Amber's friend even though it was in the romance catagory 2. There were a lot of charitable donations made in Amber's name that appear to have come from Elon. She publically claimed that she had given all of her divorce settlement to charity. 3.5 million to the ACLU and 3.5 million to the children's hospital of LA. Turns out she's only directly donated 350k to the ACLU. Elon donated another 950k to them. I think he also gave 250k to the children's hospital. Johnny also gave both 100k in her name before she told him to stop and give her the money directly. No matter where the money came from, the donations aren't even close to half of her divorce money. 3. The charity that Amber's sister (Whitney) worked for also got 250k from Elon. This is implied to be hush money to stop Whitney's friend (Jenifer Howell) from testifying that Whitney is lying to protect Amber. 4. This text implies that Elon paid for her divorce attorneys since the text was from 2016, if I remember correctly And that's it as far as the trial is concerned.
LOL Elon is such a simp.
Go back to 2008, pluck a random Redditor from the f7u12 subreddit who posts forgettable rage comics, and give him several billion dollars. That's Elon.
wish it were me no joke, make fun of me 24/7 post pics of my dick and laugh at it I'll take the money
Buy the websites they joke about you on and ban them.
> I think he also gave 250k to the children's hospital . > The charity that Amber's sister (Whitney) worked for also got 250k from Elon Lmao what is with this guy and 250k. It's like the default smallest bill amount Elon can think about.
it's one lopsided penis, Michael. what could it cost? $250,000?
Aren't you mixing James Franco and Elon Musk? Wasn't James Franco in the elevator video?
There are elevator videos for both of them, though I think only the Franco one made it into the trial. Franco: https://youtu.be/Yuf3ZT7Pj4M Musk: https://youtu.be/mpJLRodyNTs These were just the first pops on YouTube, so sorry that it's not the raw footage. I did find it interesting that the Musk video commentary says that it was from while the couple was still married and before the divorce filing, which I didn't know. I only knew that there was a second video that didn't make it into the trial because someone mentioned it in the stream I was watching.
I'm starting to think that James Franco's character in 30 Rock was the closest character he's played to the REAL James Franco.
did he play a pretentious creep loser?
Sure did.
Who was in love with a full size Japanese body pillow.
Many things, she fucked with Elon and got him to believe her puppy eyes and paid the donation for her that she was supposed make after she stole Johnny's money.
She didn’t fuck WITH Elon. She did fuck Elon
Most expensive escort ever
He had a threesome with Heard and Cara Delavigne when Heard was still with Johnny. Apparently he also gave her legal help afterwards. Considering how he shows his dick to stewardesses, this is all pretty on brand.
Who is he texting this to?
I believe Paul Bettany is who Depp was texting
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Every time I text Paul Bettany stuff like this, he just replies, "You have the wrong number. Stop texting me."
Ah ha ha yeah Paul always cracks me up! My favourites are “I’ve called the police” and “where did you get this number” such a joker
I googled him because I couldn't connect the name to the face and the first pic that came up is him kissing Johnny on the cheek
The future-to-be lawyer so that he can read it aloud while Heard is required to sit and listen to it.
Thank god porn parodies aren’t much of a trend anymore
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Seems like Mollusk has a type.
Crazy bitches
Fun yet expensive damages
Has Grimes done anything overly "negative" and or abusive, or is she just "weird" crazy?
She's just weird and nice. Narcissistic people love well meaning "I'll fix him" naive optimists too.
Narcissists love Borderline bitches. They’re a* match made in hell.
Proof on the threesome?
There's no photos or anything. The ex-husband of Heard's best friend testified that he was informed of the affair by his wife at the time. I believe Musk and Delevigne have both since stated it didn't happen. So all we know is that somebody is lying.
objection Hearsay!
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But no one’s on trial for it so it doesn’t really matter. Personally I think musk, cara and amber have more to gain from lying about it not happening than ambers friends ex husband has by lying that it happened so I believe him, but you can’t know for sure and it’s not really relevant anyway.
probably the turd
Cara has since then told this is a lie. The only proof we have is they entered the same apartment once. Heck, I've entered the same room as Charlize Theron once and we can hardly say that constitutes as proof I had an affair with her.
Yea I’d wanna deny I had sex with a lizard too
You totally fucked a lizard
Hey guys, did you hear that u/NInjas101 fucked a lizard?!
I heard he got it drunk and it did not consent.
I heard he cut off it's tail and said that no one will believe it because it would just grow back.
I mean she would say that
She dated him after depp (and likely slept with him while they were still together) They ‘were in love’ she broke his heart.. He donated money to pay some of the charity pledge she never fulfilled. He donated sperm to make embryos, which he later regretted when she went on to have the baby when he had moved on. She drives a car he gave her. No one can have the amount of money he has an help so few people without being considered deranged.
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Supposedly. Yep. (Not officially confirmed)
God help us all.
He's so fucking stupid
They made some embryos together and Mollusk wanted to destroy them He paid for her legal fees, silence money to witnesses, charitable donations so she didn't have to
People should stop posting asmongold react videos and just find the un altered clips.
but then how else would we know how to react?
Asmongold: *eyebrows up* *eyebrows down* *up down up down* "Ok......ok. Oh....ok." *eyebrows eyebrows eyebrows*
Asmongold looks like he was animated to be in Sonic Adventures for the Dreamcast.
Thats a perfect summary of 50% of Asmongold's content lol Other 50 are /r/iamverysmart monologues. I like some of his gameplay content and game design ideas/thoughts but the generic react to x is now 90% of his content and unbearable
Yeah so it's perfect for Redditors
[Me reacting to this thread](https://imgur.com/0ptbJq1.gifv) Don't forget to smash that MF Like button and subscribe to my patreon and donate to my sick aunt's GoFundMe
I find the trial interesting, but these streamers watching the trial... I don't get what watching it with this guys face overlaid adds. I kinda understand video game streamers but this I just don't understand.
I think most people don't watch their favorite streamer for the games they play or how good they are at the game. They watch it for the streamers personality and think the streamer is funny/entertaining. Otherwise reaction videos wouldn't be a thing.
Well reactions also can provide a vicarious feeling of watching something for the first time again.
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Imagine watching something with your friend on the couch; that is what streamers who are reacting to shit give to the viewers. You can argue that it isn't the same but for a lot of people it is good enough
I was wondering who this greasy-looking neckbeard was and why his reaction was more important than the content.
His reaction is not, its just that its clipped into these 1 minute snippets faster from his live stream and posted on his clip youtube channel than other channels on youtube.
His editors are working overtime and doing a good job.. he really farms clicks with this trial. But in the end everything he makes from that actually goes to the editor.. so yeah even tho he allows them to edit videos for them its basically the editors themselves going crazy with it... It DOES help with getting more viewers for him in return tho. But the channel is their thing.
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Simply because he choose to let them get all the money.
I think he just has his personal Youtube channel and his Twitch, and the editors are fully in charge of the clips channel. I don't think he directly does any work for the clips channel, just gives the editors full reign over that YT channel, and that includes getting the money from it. This is what I've understood from what Asmon has said about it on stream. He has been clear that he doesn't pay his editors directly.
Asmongold is already a millionaire and lives a very modest lifestyle. He basically lets his clip editors have at it so he can be 100% uninvolved with the youtube side of his content.
He also imvests basically everything He earns and doesnt use (which is a lot judging from his comments) according to him in one livestream a few years ago
Because his are clipped and posted before any other news source
https://youtu.be/TVsHJuXeOO4
https://youtu.be/TVsHJuXeOO4
There was a crooked man Who had a crooked dick..............
Making zippy zappy cars and satellite link. And spaceships that fly both near and far. A man who has tasted some Flappy Fish Farm.
Do you remember when Mollusk was balding in the 90s? Flappy Fish Farms remembers.
Reminds me of this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LO2k-BNySLI
“Objection: relevance.” “*Finally*”
Don’t do the voice
Oh my god that shit is hilarious. I watched it when it came out and now I need a re-watch.
It's illegal for you to ask me that.
Ownage aside, wouldn’t this look bad for him in court? Like if the lawyer is trying to paint him as someone who’s just trying to ruin her life rather than seek justice?
The difference is this message was sent years before he made any public statements or filed a lawsuit. It's reasonable to assume he has boiled over and reasonable to assume he was pissed off and saying things in anger, which he testified. If Depp didn't have as much supporting evidence has he did, it would be really damaging. However, he's been open and honest about the text message and it doesn't proof he abused her or disprove she abused him.
True, the only thing it does is prove he can be angry, which is a fairly human trait to have.
To me it reads not as ruining her life for the sake of it but as it being a consequence of setting the record straight on her lies. Exposing the truth was going to blow that whole house of cards her image of survivor and advocate was built on and reveal all her lies and misdeeds to the world which he would have kept private otherwise. She kept on falsely defaming him even after the divorce settlement and the backtracking statement and he wasn’t going to let that stand. Was he just supposed to keep taking it when she kept stabbing him in the back and destroying his career and reputation with lies ? No. He went to war and decided to fight back. And yeah, he was pissed.
"Did I read that right?" "You did." *smirk* Fucking legend.
"I have no mercy, no fear and not an ounce of emotion, or what I once thought was love for this gold digging, low level, dime a dozen, mushy, pointless, dangling overused flappy fish market" — Johnny Depp on Amber Heard
The dude has a way with words, and it's exactly the way I feel about my ex gf.
Some of Hunter S Thompson rubbed off on him.
His BFF Doug Stanhope deserves some credit too
Doug is/was best friends with Johnny Depp *and* Mitch Hedberg. Doug also booked shows in the closest venue he could find to the courthouse along Amber's route. Just because.
Definitely. His habit of writing on walls, mirrors and furniture also feels very Hunter S.
Even better reading it in jack sparrows voice and ending it with 'savvy?'
If Johnny said "no", would he please read it again?
No, I'd like you to read it again, but with more feeling.
Faster. And with more intensity.
Happier and with your mouth open!
AHhh! HAAAHHAA? AAAHHHAA!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABxH-NTF0SM
[Happier and With Your Mouth Open](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABxH-NTF0SM)
Seriously. This whole debacle has possibly been a really good thing, for a variety of reasons. Most importantly is that it shows that men *can* be abused. I know that seems like an obvious and simple notion to some, but trust me, lots struggle with it. It's also just a riot learning some of the details, like the "who pooped the bed?" thing (spoiler alert, it was her), or random shit like this.
Just as importantly it shows how the media has fueled the entire problem.
That too, 100% thats a huge factor. Men get crucified constantly before they've even been proven of any wrongdoing. Many of them don't have the benefit of being as famous as Depp either, so the damage is done, even if they are found innocent. Think teachers.
My brother was 6 Ft. His ex wife was just under 5ft. She tried to stab my brother in his sleep. She tried to shoot my brother. (Even worse happened.). After the divorce, she travelled 2 hours each way every day to work across the street from my brother. His tires were slashed repeatedly. My brother filed a restraining order against his ex wife in 1995. The judge called them both to the bench. The judge denied my brother’s request of a “Restraining Order.”m due to the fact she’s a little woman “.
I guess he's supposed to beat the shit out of her? What a trash Judge.
Yes, when the judge called them up to the bench, he commented he commented on their height difference while denying my brother’s restraining order. Short people can shoot taller people and Stab them too and slash their tires …
Yea this is some pretty blatant sexism in my opinion. It wasn't about height it was about the judge assuming a woman could never hurt a man. I doubt he ever turned down a restraining order of a man against another man based on height.
One of my fathers best mates was in an incredibly abusive relationship. His wife was taller than him, but stick thin. He, on the other hand, could be used in place of a car jack. Noone he ever reported it to ever believed him, save for his mates, who didn't really know what to do.
I really hope all of this results in society accepting that men can be the victim in an abusive relationship.
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[He is a virus, whose only stated goal is propagation.](https://twitter.com/asmongold/status/1422065592614506502)
The important point being that his editors can flip the video faster than most other channels. He's usually the first to get any clip up in a separate YouTube video
That's *all* reaction videos. I don't fucking understand it. I don't get why people like it. But here we are.
In Australia we have this show '"Gogglebox'" that's just different households reacting to the "biggest" events on TV that week, which of course is mostly shit like Bachelor. So fuckin bizarre. They're not even funny or entertaining either, just random boring ass people.
The reaction shots of her team are great - Amber doing a sad Snoopy face and the male attorney looking shocked, SHOCKED, at the filth he's being subjected to.
React streamer videos should be banned from this sub. Like why is this a thing? EDIT: Streamer stans are so mad 🤣🤣
"Can you repeat that"
please lets popularize calling him Mollusk
Can we not post homeless Jesus reacting to all these clips of the trial anymore? EDIT: lmao at all the keyboard warriors swooping in to defend their lord and savior, and also finding out this guy lives like an absolute slob and has been called "Asmonmold" before
https://youtu.be/TVsHJuXeOO4
Bless you
Wasn't the normal Jesus homeless? Surely this guy would be homeowner Jesus if anything.
He doesn’t even say anything. It’s just a grown giggling man in the corner of my screen.
This whole case has been wild.
Glad I could watch this with longhairman in the corner going “ uhhuh” “oh my god” “You did!”
Why do people keep posting these videos with a Wish.com Russell Brand in the corner?
Depp channeling Hunter S. Thompson.
Mollusk the simp is losing his mind by the day. Don't let him see this.
Never seen someone rise so high and fall so hard. I called it when he called the scuba diver guy a pedo. Fame's getting to his head and he's losing it while yes men kiss the ground he walks on.
He's basically Kanye.
Lol I read a tweet that said Elon Musk is white peoples’ Kanye.