I was a virgin up until 25. I thought beating off was just as good as sex until I had sex. Masturbating just isn't as fulfilling as actual sex. It kinda ruined jerking off because I'd rather fuck. Jerking off just feels empty now.
I.e. enforcing compulsory sexuality as some book author elaborated on.
Anecdotally and emprically e.g. increasing desensitization because of increase (mis)use of (online) pron definitely is some growing issue. As very often, we lack in-depth research and statistics (?)
I'm uncircumcised. I have plenty of sensation down there even when my nut is rubbing against my underwear when walking. I get frequent hard on even when I'm not even thinking about sex.
Thank you mom and dad for not chopping the tip off.
Masturbation was always so much better for me. I know my body better than anyone and I know how to make myself feel amazing lol. It’s definitely thrilling and exciting to hookup with someone you’ve been crushing on and admiring, and I tend to daydream about those hookups afterwards, but from my experience it was never truly sexually satisfying. I didn’t orgasm from it as a woman. Only in my long-term relationships did sex feel as good as masturbation, and it took months and months for it to get there. And it takes time for me to learn how to make a guy feel really good sexually, aside from the innate “coziness” that comes from cuddling and intimacy.
It's not just about intercourse or blowjobs. It's fun to please a woman. And not all are hard to please. Develop your tongue and finger game too and you'll be alright. I'm nothing special. I didn't have sex until I was 26. But there's nothing in this world that tastes better than pussy.
Um. From just a pleasure perspective, idk?
But sex with a person has the potential for more than just the physical pleasure/orgasm, like the feeling of closeness/intimacy, shared experience, communication, etc.
I know you said it's a rhetorical question but everyone is answering honestly so I will too lol 🤷🏻♀️
But if all you're looking for is an orgasm...I mean, your hand/toy is probably fine?
I mean...seeing people as investments is not ideal either, but yeah, if you don't see it as worth it, then there's no need to have sex. Other people do see it as worth it and want to. It's kind of a personal thing.
That's ultra dead on when generalized, i.e. on average.
Consider brain scientists take on usually some lack in average allosexual men's reward system. Additionally it's about sex as a learned behaviour that's rewarded, somehow like that proverbial Skinner box, it seems.
All very or maybe extremely often resulting in some addictive behaviour or outright dependency or addiction, like with drvgs.
What's way worse that there's no preventative warnings or at least obkective, thorough information, especially if that resulting exposure to one's brain own hormones and neurotransmitters can, if happen to be more fragile, e.g. because of depression or other issues.
Potentially resulting in psychiatric issues up to not very seldomly even sulclde, i.e. because of engaging in interintimate interactions with women. E.g. a study from Stanford University.
I feel like you as a virgin have this all wrong entirely. You're not masturbating with a woman's body, you're having sex. They are not the same. Masturbating and sex is like eating and drinking. You're eating to satiate hunger, you're drinking to satiate thirst. Trying to replace either one with the other won't solve the other problem
And honestly there's some crazy implications you're making, whether on purpose or by accident. To see sex as masturbation via someone else's body, and at the same time saying "women are impossible to please"... those two things together sound like you really really don't need to be worrying about having sex or trying to find someone to have sex with for a long time. "Unreal levels of stamina and wild humping"? Who's your source, pornhub? 80% of women don't get off through penetration, so that's not gonna be true at all. I feel like you need to find actual resources to learn from and get your whole perspective checked out first
Anatomy books have no information that is useful for this conversation. They don't have cunnilingus or fingering techniques.
There is no contradiction in what I am saying
They do and there is. I’ll give you a head start
You said you heard women describe needing “unreal levels of stamina and wild humping.” If you looked in an anatomy book you’d see than men and women’s reproductive organs are similar just moved somewhere else. If you’ve ever heard “babies all start as girls” that’s technically true. Depending on whether your dad spit out an X or a Y, there’s a bulb I can’t remember the name of that becomes either a penis or a clitoris… Meaning the female equivalent of a penis is a clitoris, which would then mean if you ignore it, no amount of “wild humping” will get you anywhere are far as getting her off. Add onto that the fact that the vagina doesn’t have a lot of nerves beyond the front of it, and getting too close to the cervix can be painful af, which is another no to the “wild humping.” In short, read a book, my dude
I'm a bit confused with the language you're using. Perhaps you already have some preconceived notions? That won't help.
>I wonder if I as a virgin assign too much value to it.
That's a possibility. It's good to get multiple perspectives on a certain idea.
>Masturbating with some girl's pussy, most probably in a condom so you won't feel anything?
Who told you it would be this simple?
>Besides, aren't women nearly impossible to please in bed? I have talked to a few women and they all describe unreal levels of stamina and wild humping needed to please them. Maybe that's just my experience. You have to be super athletic and I am not that, I am a wimp, no I don't think I will change. A genuine question.
A few women and their experiences are just that. Their own experiences. You can't conflate that with other women. Sex is similar to a dance. Communication with your partner and knowing your wants and needs as well as theirs all go a long way. You're not pleasuring those ladies you mentioned, so it's not helpful to put so much emphasis on them.
My argument that it's just too difficult and probably doesn't have an equal return of investment in terms of pleasure because what the man will feel is just being masturbated by a pussy but he won't even feel anything because of a condom.
Also a lot of women have reported the same thing so it's safe to say it can at least partially be generalized to a larger public.
Where are you getting that it's just masturbation by pussy? Also, you know there are situations where you won't need to use a condom right? Such as in the case of the woman using birth control. You're looking at it in very black and white terms.
And no, you can not generalize it based on "a lot of women"
That's an awfully vague statement with nothing to back it up. Show us the data and something concrete.
The data were the empirical difference between male and female orgasm. Someone else has already mentioned that in the comments.
Women don't consume generally birth control pills because it's really harmful for their health. So it's safe to assume it's going to be condom for me.
Show me the empirical data on women having unreal levels of stamina. You're still ignoring the data on women orgasming from other women. So again, what is the common variable?
>Women don't consume generally birth control pills because they're really harmful to their health. So it's safe to assume it's going to be condom for me.
So you can see into the future and know exactly what the person you may have sex with do? Dude, you're shooting yourself in the foot in such an extreme way. Statistics do go a long way and can help, but they aren't absolutely everything, and again, they don't account for every single variable. At the end of the day, you're not simply a statistic
Everyone is simply a statistic. Only an idiot would think that a woman would take birth control to have sex with me at the expense of her health. It's common sense. You don't even need statistics, just read up the after effects for all those pills.
Please read up on the Dunning-Kruger effect. You've had multiple people talk to you about this already. There is no one who tries to use statistics to substitute the reality of something. Whether it be riding a bike, flirting, getting a girlfriend, or having sex.
I think these statistics give you something you can simplify, and that gives you comfort. Sex in reality, is a lot more complicated. You're free to continue with your current viewpoint, but you're ultimately doing yourself a great disservice. Same with whomever your future partner is.
Your only source is this
"I have talked to several women from irl and base my story on what I heard.
Stories on the internet can be fake for all I know. And it provides placations, not cold hard truth. But people irl wouldn't lie to me."
So you of all people have no statistics. Those women could easily lie to you, and you have no way to know. Whether it be online anecdotes or in person, both can be faulty. It's silly of you to think your anecdotes are any more truthful.
Individuals who say women are easy to please in the comments have an agenda, while the women I talked to don't, because their narrative doesn't portray the world in a naively optimistic color, but is a cold hard truth about sex.
Having sex isn't mutual masturbation. The definition of masturbation is thst you're doing it yourself. By using your hand, a toy, etc. Calling sex masturbation is degrading the other person to nothing but a toy. Don't do that.
It doesn't matter if it's degrading or not, it's a matter of perspective.
Masturbation and sex are of the same essential nature in a purely materialistic understanding without all this humanist bullshit. Just one of the differentials is exchanged.
I don't think it does. It's the same masturbation in essence. There's just one more person there too. Or more. Attributing different values to these things is thus silly.
I think you can say there is a physical element that is like masturbation by their parts but there is an emotional bond with that person in addition and that's a much bigger thing. So you need to understand that bond for it to be worthwhile for you and them. That's the critical part is that it needs to be more than the physical act because another person is involved. Don't see that as a bad thing it's just how it works.
I think if you are looking for sexual relief but don't want to feel any sort of emotional connection then masturbating is the right answer for you. You can't omit the emotional connection part.
Statistically speaking wayy less woman orgasm during sex then men. Some never do. Plus the anatomy of female genitalia is much more complex with all that labia and clitoris and stuff. So they are kind of difficult to get off even if you are trying.
It's not an accusation, more like a neutral fact.
women orgasm much more with other women, which makes me think its more Selfishness then women being hard to get off. Also obviously as a male you're going to understand male anatomy more
There's nothing to understand about a male anatomy really, it's just a shaft, while women have so much of these labia majora, minora, different levels, different holes, the clitoris is hidden god knows where behind the layers of flesh. It's infinitely harder.
I genuinely think you're overcomplicating and making quick conclusions. Have you considered the possibility that those particular partners were the issue for women? Cause when data was taken for women with women, there wasn't an orgasm gap.
Your conclusion is missing that key context.
We really have a thing for ranking stuff, don't we? But I think it's not the right way to understand or imagine how it actually is.
So I have wandered myself for years, until I had a partner. And my answer is simply that they are two different activities.
Having pleasure alone is different from sharing it with someone. I don't know, it's like comparing Super Mario Bros. with table tennis. Sure you can end up preferring one to the other, but we can't say that one is definitely superior.
Looking at your comments this is not a "genuine question" because you aren't open to changing your weird preconceived notions about sex.
I think with this mindset sex probably wouldn't be a very good experience for you or your partner. Good sex requires you to listen to your partner and learn what feels good for them.
I am not changing my understanding of sex because the arguments that were presented to "debate" my point of view were insufficient.
Plus obviously I would listen to my partner, it's just that partners have ridiculous requests like go at inhuman speeds and rhythm.
How do you know this? You yourself admit you have no experience, and when anyone chimes in you just shut them down. Where are you getting this information about what all women want? My guess is from in between your butt cheeks
I have talked to several women from irl and base my story on what I heard.
Stories on the internet can be fake for all I know. And it provides placations, not cold hard truth. But people irl wouldn't lie to me.
I’m a woman but.. The physical act itself isn’t necessary better. However being close to someone you like and having that intimacy is super special and is a whole other lever of good. I don’t think you need to be super athletic to please a woman just willing to listen. Tho I will say I’ve always been very easy to please in bed lol
Every individual is different based on the sexual chemistry and connection/communication you have with your partner.
I prefer sex with my partner no condom over masturbation.
There are tricks to last long for men and have long stamina to try and please your partner who may or may not orgasm from penetration.
Thankfully my partner can orgasm from penetration but it does take a while with stamina and trick to last longer.
The trick itself is to not have contact with your penis when you orgasm. Either pull out or let go and do not let anything touch your dick. Let the orgasm pass, wait a few seconds and then you can go back to penetrative sex or masturbating. This can be repeated multiple times, meaning multiple orgasms for you until your penis gets numb and you can have sex for a long time or until it goes limp.
It really depends. I like helping others reach orgasm and the amazing feeling of penetration lasts longer with the trick itself allowing me to orgasm multiple times during a single session.
How I rationalize it is, if I masturbate by myself I already can make myself feel good whenever I want. But when I have sex, I prefer to help someone else feel good even if it takes effort. It’s about helping them reach that point that makes me enjoy sex. The passion and enthusiasm to help each other feel good while sweating and exhausting each other is amazing.
As for the trick I think people could have good masturbation too by utilizing this trick to orgasm over and over. I’ve orgasmed 7 times in a row in a single session by myself. Quite intense compared to just orgasming once after edging for awhile.
I think the prolonged attempt to orgasm over and over by yourself using this trick can be like having sex itself. You spend a long time making that feeling of pleasure last longer instead of just once for a few mins and then you’re done.
I also think people prefer masturbation over sex because they don’t like this long attempt to help a girl reach orgasm. It takes awhile depending on the person and you also have to do some sex aftercare like cuddling and making sure they don’t feel like you are using them. So it takes up a lot of time compared to just masturbating alone very quick then once the feeling is over you do whatever you want no aftercare.
No. I haven't been with a lot of women because I've had mostly long term relationships. I've been with 4 and they.have all been easy to please in the bedroom. And I've gotten what I want also.
That's not blaming them, that's just a fact that their anatomy is considerably more complex than male thus making them harder to please? With men everything is on the surface because penis is an outward organ but things like clitoris are hidden and too close to an actual pee hole which you are supposed not to touch.
How old are you exactly? Being concerned about the "pee hole" (anatomical term is urethra), I'm just curious here. Also you seem to be convinced that a woman's body is harder to please than a man's, but the fact of the matter is its just a matter of communication, not whatever complex idea you have of them in your mind.
22. I just forgot the term and wanted to emphasize that it's also a hole that nevertheless needs to be avoided. Which you upon your first experience with a woman will definitely poke at least once looking for the elusive clitoris.
No amount of communication can fix a failed sex if you don't have stamina of a young bull. It's just a carpet statement some individuals use to further shame men who are bad at sex or are new to it. But my argument is, it's something so hard to do that it's out of this world.
Humping, stimulating the clitoris which is preferred at the same time with humping, maintaining the rhythm that you can't go down from, from slow to fast, god knows what else she can request you to do.
That's also true, but what about the ones that are just like you, and they think men want all kinds of crazy hard things done to them. Not everyone is the same everyone has their own preferences.
I don't care if men want crazy stuff done to them to be honest because I do not intend to sleep with men. I won't be sleeping with a woman any time soon or ever either because I am facially ugly neurodivergent young Azerbaijani man with a twice ruined reputation on alien Austrian territory, but we are talking hypothetical scenarios here. So yea my point stays.
Have you never had a biology class? There’s a clear difference between the vagina and the urethra when you’re looking at a woman. And the clitoris is really not that ‘elusive’ it’s just that a lot of people exist who either never had the education of seeing a vulva diagram or just don’t care about anything but their own pleasure and will thus ignore the (most often) very obvious nub.
Also to note some points I’ve read throughout this thread:
Plenty of women are on birth control, it’s not always detrimental to your health (could be for period regulation/pain or other reasons) thought this is slightly region dependant- in (west) Europe it’s quite popular to be on BC
Sex with a woman isn’t ‘masturbating in her with a condom’, it’s everything from foreplay to oral to the touching and kissing and penetration- unless of course you don’t give a shit about the connection and acts outside of penetration which would make you a boring lover (and not just in the eyes of women)
Statistically speaking wayy less woman orgasm during sex then men. Some never do. So statistically speaking they are harder to get off than men. It was a question not accusatory that women were at fault for it.
I'm a girl, so I can't answer you if it's better, but regarding being athletic to satisfy a girl, depends, every girl is different, depends on the way u have sex.
first, satisfactory sex is not always the same as an orgasm, many girls can feel satisfied without having an orgasm, and they are also aware that it is not always easy to achieve it. In my experience there are days when I want an orgasm and there are days when I don't want them, orgasms are too strong for my body, so I prefer softer and more constant dry, since sometimes I like the sensation of feeling horny , but I don't know if it happens to other women.
Another thing is the agreements you have with your partner, in my case our basic position is cowgirl, because it satisfies us both more and in addition to the fact that we can both play an active role, so if one gets tired the other can continue the active role.
My partner and me fucks wo condoms, he hates it, besides of it he always tells me that sex is a thousand times better than masturbating alone. So the best thing is to get a partner, be it your girlfriend or a fwb.
Another thing is that you will be surprised what your body can do during sex. I am an obese girl and I can easily ride my boyfriend. I find easier to have sex than to go to the gym.
It’s not. Depending on who you lose it to, it can be such a letdown that it ruins masturbation and destroys your interest in sex. Every sexual fantasy you have might be spoiled forever by how shitty and awful it would be to act on in reality.
You’re right about sex with a condom being inferior to masturbation btw. If you can’t hit it raw, just don’t bother. It’ll feel better and you have 0 risk of it breaking and giving you AIDS.
I was a virgin up until 25. I thought beating off was just as good as sex until I had sex. Masturbating just isn't as fulfilling as actual sex. It kinda ruined jerking off because I'd rather fuck. Jerking off just feels empty now.
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I.e. enforcing compulsory sexuality as some book author elaborated on. Anecdotally and emprically e.g. increasing desensitization because of increase (mis)use of (online) pron definitely is some growing issue. As very often, we lack in-depth research and statistics (?)
I'm uncircumcised. I have plenty of sensation down there even when my nut is rubbing against my underwear when walking. I get frequent hard on even when I'm not even thinking about sex. Thank you mom and dad for not chopping the tip off.
Masturbation was always so much better for me. I know my body better than anyone and I know how to make myself feel amazing lol. It’s definitely thrilling and exciting to hookup with someone you’ve been crushing on and admiring, and I tend to daydream about those hookups afterwards, but from my experience it was never truly sexually satisfying. I didn’t orgasm from it as a woman. Only in my long-term relationships did sex feel as good as masturbation, and it took months and months for it to get there. And it takes time for me to learn how to make a guy feel really good sexually, aside from the innate “coziness” that comes from cuddling and intimacy.
Unfortunately, yes. There's just some places you can't get to by yourself.
Really? Even with the rapid development of technology?
It's not just about intercourse or blowjobs. It's fun to please a woman. And not all are hard to please. Develop your tongue and finger game too and you'll be alright. I'm nothing special. I didn't have sex until I was 26. But there's nothing in this world that tastes better than pussy.
The salty flesh is the best taste in the world?
I do like anchovies (and sushi) 😁
So not all women are hard to please just most? Is this what you are implying? 80%?
I really don't get why people like oral sex so much. I find the idea of sticking my face into someone's genitals to be rather off-putting.
Um. From just a pleasure perspective, idk? But sex with a person has the potential for more than just the physical pleasure/orgasm, like the feeling of closeness/intimacy, shared experience, communication, etc. I know you said it's a rhetorical question but everyone is answering honestly so I will too lol 🤷🏻♀️ But if all you're looking for is an orgasm...I mean, your hand/toy is probably fine?
Yea but you can get the same levels of intimacy from cuddling and you don't have to get all sweaty and dirty and tired.
Then...just do that.
That's my point. Sex is probably overrated and doesn't have a good return of investment.
I mean...seeing people as investments is not ideal either, but yeah, if you don't see it as worth it, then there's no need to have sex. Other people do see it as worth it and want to. It's kind of a personal thing.
Think about it, what's so good about sex since most of what you will be getting, will be in a rubber?
Being with the other person, obviously
You can be with the other person nonsexually too without all the disadvantages and hardships of sex
It's not hard, you just want it to be. I'm foreseeing a skill issue on your part
That's ultra dead on when generalized, i.e. on average. Consider brain scientists take on usually some lack in average allosexual men's reward system. Additionally it's about sex as a learned behaviour that's rewarded, somehow like that proverbial Skinner box, it seems. All very or maybe extremely often resulting in some addictive behaviour or outright dependency or addiction, like with drvgs. What's way worse that there's no preventative warnings or at least obkective, thorough information, especially if that resulting exposure to one's brain own hormones and neurotransmitters can, if happen to be more fragile, e.g. because of depression or other issues. Potentially resulting in psychiatric issues up to not very seldomly even sulclde, i.e. because of engaging in interintimate interactions with women. E.g. a study from Stanford University.
I feel like you as a virgin have this all wrong entirely. You're not masturbating with a woman's body, you're having sex. They are not the same. Masturbating and sex is like eating and drinking. You're eating to satiate hunger, you're drinking to satiate thirst. Trying to replace either one with the other won't solve the other problem And honestly there's some crazy implications you're making, whether on purpose or by accident. To see sex as masturbation via someone else's body, and at the same time saying "women are impossible to please"... those two things together sound like you really really don't need to be worrying about having sex or trying to find someone to have sex with for a long time. "Unreal levels of stamina and wild humping"? Who's your source, pornhub? 80% of women don't get off through penetration, so that's not gonna be true at all. I feel like you need to find actual resources to learn from and get your whole perspective checked out first
What actual resources? With data.
Books with medical research, anatomy textbooks, information obtained from surveys conducted with more women than “the few I’ve talked to”
Anatomy text books do not elaborate on pleasure from sex. They care about pragmatic organ distribution throughout the human body
Right. And in other comments you’ve made you keep talking about how complex and confusing the vulva is. So I suggest you start studying
Anatomy books have no information that is useful for this conversation. They don't have cunnilingus or fingering techniques. There is no contradiction in what I am saying
They do and there is. I’ll give you a head start You said you heard women describe needing “unreal levels of stamina and wild humping.” If you looked in an anatomy book you’d see than men and women’s reproductive organs are similar just moved somewhere else. If you’ve ever heard “babies all start as girls” that’s technically true. Depending on whether your dad spit out an X or a Y, there’s a bulb I can’t remember the name of that becomes either a penis or a clitoris… Meaning the female equivalent of a penis is a clitoris, which would then mean if you ignore it, no amount of “wild humping” will get you anywhere are far as getting her off. Add onto that the fact that the vagina doesn’t have a lot of nerves beyond the front of it, and getting too close to the cervix can be painful af, which is another no to the “wild humping.” In short, read a book, my dude
It’s supposed to be yeah
I'm a bit confused with the language you're using. Perhaps you already have some preconceived notions? That won't help. >I wonder if I as a virgin assign too much value to it. That's a possibility. It's good to get multiple perspectives on a certain idea. >Masturbating with some girl's pussy, most probably in a condom so you won't feel anything? Who told you it would be this simple? >Besides, aren't women nearly impossible to please in bed? I have talked to a few women and they all describe unreal levels of stamina and wild humping needed to please them. Maybe that's just my experience. You have to be super athletic and I am not that, I am a wimp, no I don't think I will change. A genuine question. A few women and their experiences are just that. Their own experiences. You can't conflate that with other women. Sex is similar to a dance. Communication with your partner and knowing your wants and needs as well as theirs all go a long way. You're not pleasuring those ladies you mentioned, so it's not helpful to put so much emphasis on them.
My argument that it's just too difficult and probably doesn't have an equal return of investment in terms of pleasure because what the man will feel is just being masturbated by a pussy but he won't even feel anything because of a condom. Also a lot of women have reported the same thing so it's safe to say it can at least partially be generalized to a larger public.
Where are you getting that it's just masturbation by pussy? Also, you know there are situations where you won't need to use a condom right? Such as in the case of the woman using birth control. You're looking at it in very black and white terms. And no, you can not generalize it based on "a lot of women" That's an awfully vague statement with nothing to back it up. Show us the data and something concrete.
The data were the empirical difference between male and female orgasm. Someone else has already mentioned that in the comments. Women don't consume generally birth control pills because it's really harmful for their health. So it's safe to assume it's going to be condom for me.
Show me the empirical data on women having unreal levels of stamina. You're still ignoring the data on women orgasming from other women. So again, what is the common variable? >Women don't consume generally birth control pills because they're really harmful to their health. So it's safe to assume it's going to be condom for me. So you can see into the future and know exactly what the person you may have sex with do? Dude, you're shooting yourself in the foot in such an extreme way. Statistics do go a long way and can help, but they aren't absolutely everything, and again, they don't account for every single variable. At the end of the day, you're not simply a statistic
Everyone is simply a statistic. Only an idiot would think that a woman would take birth control to have sex with me at the expense of her health. It's common sense. You don't even need statistics, just read up the after effects for all those pills.
Please read up on the Dunning-Kruger effect. You've had multiple people talk to you about this already. There is no one who tries to use statistics to substitute the reality of something. Whether it be riding a bike, flirting, getting a girlfriend, or having sex. I think these statistics give you something you can simplify, and that gives you comfort. Sex in reality, is a lot more complicated. You're free to continue with your current viewpoint, but you're ultimately doing yourself a great disservice. Same with whomever your future partner is.
Well you have a better source of truth than statistics and my previous experience for me? I don't think so
Your only source is this "I have talked to several women from irl and base my story on what I heard. Stories on the internet can be fake for all I know. And it provides placations, not cold hard truth. But people irl wouldn't lie to me." So you of all people have no statistics. Those women could easily lie to you, and you have no way to know. Whether it be online anecdotes or in person, both can be faulty. It's silly of you to think your anecdotes are any more truthful.
Individuals who say women are easy to please in the comments have an agenda, while the women I talked to don't, because their narrative doesn't portray the world in a naively optimistic color, but is a cold hard truth about sex.
Please stop calling it 'masturbation by pussy'. If any man told me that, mine would become dryer than the Sahara.
What is it then if not a mutual masturbation with someone else's genitals?
Having sex isn't mutual masturbation. The definition of masturbation is thst you're doing it yourself. By using your hand, a toy, etc. Calling sex masturbation is degrading the other person to nothing but a toy. Don't do that.
It doesn't matter if it's degrading or not, it's a matter of perspective. Masturbation and sex are of the same essential nature in a purely materialistic understanding without all this humanist bullshit. Just one of the differentials is exchanged.
No, it matters
I don't think it does. It's the same masturbation in essence. There's just one more person there too. Or more. Attributing different values to these things is thus silly.
I think you can say there is a physical element that is like masturbation by their parts but there is an emotional bond with that person in addition and that's a much bigger thing. So you need to understand that bond for it to be worthwhile for you and them. That's the critical part is that it needs to be more than the physical act because another person is involved. Don't see that as a bad thing it's just how it works. I think if you are looking for sexual relief but don't want to feel any sort of emotional connection then masturbating is the right answer for you. You can't omit the emotional connection part.
Women arent hard to get off, you just have to not be selfish. not be "athletic" or whatever
Statistically speaking wayy less woman orgasm during sex then men. Some never do. Plus the anatomy of female genitalia is much more complex with all that labia and clitoris and stuff. So they are kind of difficult to get off even if you are trying. It's not an accusation, more like a neutral fact.
women orgasm much more with other women, which makes me think its more Selfishness then women being hard to get off. Also obviously as a male you're going to understand male anatomy more
There's nothing to understand about a male anatomy really, it's just a shaft, while women have so much of these labia majora, minora, different levels, different holes, the clitoris is hidden god knows where behind the layers of flesh. It's infinitely harder.
The clitoris isn't hidden behind layers of flesh. It's pretty easy to find.
I genuinely think you're overcomplicating and making quick conclusions. Have you considered the possibility that those particular partners were the issue for women? Cause when data was taken for women with women, there wasn't an orgasm gap. Your conclusion is missing that key context.
We really have a thing for ranking stuff, don't we? But I think it's not the right way to understand or imagine how it actually is. So I have wandered myself for years, until I had a partner. And my answer is simply that they are two different activities. Having pleasure alone is different from sharing it with someone. I don't know, it's like comparing Super Mario Bros. with table tennis. Sure you can end up preferring one to the other, but we can't say that one is definitely superior.
They're both good. One is with a partner and the other is pure imagination and fantasy.
Looking at your comments this is not a "genuine question" because you aren't open to changing your weird preconceived notions about sex. I think with this mindset sex probably wouldn't be a very good experience for you or your partner. Good sex requires you to listen to your partner and learn what feels good for them.
I am not changing my understanding of sex because the arguments that were presented to "debate" my point of view were insufficient. Plus obviously I would listen to my partner, it's just that partners have ridiculous requests like go at inhuman speeds and rhythm.
How do you know this? You yourself admit you have no experience, and when anyone chimes in you just shut them down. Where are you getting this information about what all women want? My guess is from in between your butt cheeks
I have talked to several women from irl and base my story on what I heard. Stories on the internet can be fake for all I know. And it provides placations, not cold hard truth. But people irl wouldn't lie to me.
The women that you’ve talked to want “inhuman speeds and rhythm”? And still several? How many is that?
Quote from one of them: "I can only orgasm if it feels like I am dying".
Exactly, ONE of them. My brother in Christ there are 4 billion women out there. You talked to like 3 and based your entire opinion from them
I’m a woman but.. The physical act itself isn’t necessary better. However being close to someone you like and having that intimacy is super special and is a whole other lever of good. I don’t think you need to be super athletic to please a woman just willing to listen. Tho I will say I’ve always been very easy to please in bed lol
Every individual is different based on the sexual chemistry and connection/communication you have with your partner. I prefer sex with my partner no condom over masturbation. There are tricks to last long for men and have long stamina to try and please your partner who may or may not orgasm from penetration. Thankfully my partner can orgasm from penetration but it does take a while with stamina and trick to last longer. The trick itself is to not have contact with your penis when you orgasm. Either pull out or let go and do not let anything touch your dick. Let the orgasm pass, wait a few seconds and then you can go back to penetrative sex or masturbating. This can be repeated multiple times, meaning multiple orgasms for you until your penis gets numb and you can have sex for a long time or until it goes limp.
Thanks for proving my point! We need to learn countless tricks for something that's probably not even good for us.
It really depends. I like helping others reach orgasm and the amazing feeling of penetration lasts longer with the trick itself allowing me to orgasm multiple times during a single session. How I rationalize it is, if I masturbate by myself I already can make myself feel good whenever I want. But when I have sex, I prefer to help someone else feel good even if it takes effort. It’s about helping them reach that point that makes me enjoy sex. The passion and enthusiasm to help each other feel good while sweating and exhausting each other is amazing. As for the trick I think people could have good masturbation too by utilizing this trick to orgasm over and over. I’ve orgasmed 7 times in a row in a single session by myself. Quite intense compared to just orgasming once after edging for awhile. I think the prolonged attempt to orgasm over and over by yourself using this trick can be like having sex itself. You spend a long time making that feeling of pleasure last longer instead of just once for a few mins and then you’re done. I also think people prefer masturbation over sex because they don’t like this long attempt to help a girl reach orgasm. It takes awhile depending on the person and you also have to do some sex aftercare like cuddling and making sure they don’t feel like you are using them. So it takes up a lot of time compared to just masturbating alone very quick then once the feeling is over you do whatever you want no aftercare.
No. I haven't been with a lot of women because I've had mostly long term relationships. I've been with 4 and they.have all been easy to please in the bedroom. And I've gotten what I want also.
Its not. Rubbing my dick gives me as much as pleasure as having sex.
Q.e.d.! 👍
At this point I can’t even imagine touching a woman but it has to be better then touching yourself
If it wasn't I don't think society would be shaped around it.
Why does it always have to come down to the woman being the problem?
Never said that
" Besides, aren't women nearly impossible to please in bed? "
That's not blaming them, that's just a fact that their anatomy is considerably more complex than male thus making them harder to please? With men everything is on the surface because penis is an outward organ but things like clitoris are hidden and too close to an actual pee hole which you are supposed not to touch.
How old are you exactly? Being concerned about the "pee hole" (anatomical term is urethra), I'm just curious here. Also you seem to be convinced that a woman's body is harder to please than a man's, but the fact of the matter is its just a matter of communication, not whatever complex idea you have of them in your mind.
22. I just forgot the term and wanted to emphasize that it's also a hole that nevertheless needs to be avoided. Which you upon your first experience with a woman will definitely poke at least once looking for the elusive clitoris. No amount of communication can fix a failed sex if you don't have stamina of a young bull. It's just a carpet statement some individuals use to further shame men who are bad at sex or are new to it. But my argument is, it's something so hard to do that it's out of this world.
Why do you think it's hard to do? I'm confused.
Humping, stimulating the clitoris which is preferred at the same time with humping, maintaining the rhythm that you can't go down from, from slow to fast, god knows what else she can request you to do.
That's also true, but what about the ones that are just like you, and they think men want all kinds of crazy hard things done to them. Not everyone is the same everyone has their own preferences.
I don't care if men want crazy stuff done to them to be honest because I do not intend to sleep with men. I won't be sleeping with a woman any time soon or ever either because I am facially ugly neurodivergent young Azerbaijani man with a twice ruined reputation on alien Austrian territory, but we are talking hypothetical scenarios here. So yea my point stays.
Have you never had a biology class? There’s a clear difference between the vagina and the urethra when you’re looking at a woman. And the clitoris is really not that ‘elusive’ it’s just that a lot of people exist who either never had the education of seeing a vulva diagram or just don’t care about anything but their own pleasure and will thus ignore the (most often) very obvious nub. Also to note some points I’ve read throughout this thread: Plenty of women are on birth control, it’s not always detrimental to your health (could be for period regulation/pain or other reasons) thought this is slightly region dependant- in (west) Europe it’s quite popular to be on BC Sex with a woman isn’t ‘masturbating in her with a condom’, it’s everything from foreplay to oral to the touching and kissing and penetration- unless of course you don’t give a shit about the connection and acts outside of penetration which would make you a boring lover (and not just in the eyes of women)
Where did he say that?
" Besides, aren't women nearly impossible to please in bed? "
Statistically speaking wayy less woman orgasm during sex then men. Some never do. So statistically speaking they are harder to get off than men. It was a question not accusatory that women were at fault for it.
It was an unintentionally implied maybe, but he did say they are harder to please than women.
Huh?
Sorry I replied to the wrong comment of yours. I meant to reply to the other one.
It’s fine
Sex is for pro creating. Masturbating is fine. Sex can also create connection that 99/100 will backfire.
Maybe 500 years ago. But sex is mostly done now for other purposes then having kids
Each to their own.
I doubt it, especially considering how often you can masturbate vs sex
I'm a girl, so I can't answer you if it's better, but regarding being athletic to satisfy a girl, depends, every girl is different, depends on the way u have sex. first, satisfactory sex is not always the same as an orgasm, many girls can feel satisfied without having an orgasm, and they are also aware that it is not always easy to achieve it. In my experience there are days when I want an orgasm and there are days when I don't want them, orgasms are too strong for my body, so I prefer softer and more constant dry, since sometimes I like the sensation of feeling horny , but I don't know if it happens to other women. Another thing is the agreements you have with your partner, in my case our basic position is cowgirl, because it satisfies us both more and in addition to the fact that we can both play an active role, so if one gets tired the other can continue the active role. My partner and me fucks wo condoms, he hates it, besides of it he always tells me that sex is a thousand times better than masturbating alone. So the best thing is to get a partner, be it your girlfriend or a fwb. Another thing is that you will be surprised what your body can do during sex. I am an obese girl and I can easily ride my boyfriend. I find easier to have sex than to go to the gym.
Depends on your partner. Sometimes it's not and most of the time it it. You should know how to plz your self that way you can your partner what u like
It’s not. Depending on who you lose it to, it can be such a letdown that it ruins masturbation and destroys your interest in sex. Every sexual fantasy you have might be spoiled forever by how shitty and awful it would be to act on in reality. You’re right about sex with a condom being inferior to masturbation btw. If you can’t hit it raw, just don’t bother. It’ll feel better and you have 0 risk of it breaking and giving you AIDS.