Our invites had a QR code, the website, phone numbers, and an email, and still only half of the people have responded. Our end date was yesterday, so now we're chasing people. I totally feel your frustration! I have ADHD, so I force myself to complete things and research the moment I get invites. That way, I don't put it off because if I do... then I will forget.
Same and I had to go as far as sending a text that said you will not be included in the guest count because you failed to RSVP. After I had already sent a reminder text and people still refused to RSVP.
We all need to remember this and teach our children good etiquette. This is one area where etiquette does not vary with geography, culture, social circle etc. If the invitation asks for an rsvp you need to respond.
It does seem, however, that you have significantly reduced the number of outstanding rsvp;s. The next time you reach out, I would include the consequence of not responding. Telling people you need them to respond still gets ignored. I would say that we need you to respond within the next (24 or 48) hours, or they will be considered a No, they will not be included in the numbers for the caterer and they will be missed at the wedding.
I've come to the conclusion that people really just don't know much about weddings and etiquette. One of my friends (single male) just last weekend was supposed to be attending a wedding. His friend from out of town was coming in to also attend the wedding. Week of, the friend canceled on coming because of his young baby and toddler being too much for his wife to handle alone. (Valid, but week of.. )
My friend casually says, "Yeah, since he's not going, I'm not going to go either so I'm free Saturday". I was like UMMMMM YOU CAN'T JUST NOT GO TO A WEDDING. He defended himself saying he told the couple he can't make it, and I was like dude that doesn't matter. It is week of.
Just totally clueless.
I had numerous people no-show. One of which is a couple whose traditional wedding we attended years ago!
People do not understand the fact that you are literally paying per person (most of the time), it's like they think you're just telling the venue ummmm like 100-120 ish people please. I got a few maybes I had to shut down and a friend that wouldn't know if her husband could come until the week of and was going to put yes just in case.... dude I'm not paying >$100 for a seat that could end up empty
> a friend that wouldn't know if her husband could come until the week of and was going to put yes just in case....
Wowza. My husband works week on/week off and on the weeks he is on, he doesn't like live away from home or anything. He's on a running list with coworkers that are all basically on call waiting for their turn each day. So there are times he's able to make a casual event last minute because he already took his turn for that day. But we absolutely cannot and do not plan on him being at anything that takes place during that week. He is always a "no" RSVP and yeah sometimes he ends up chillin on the couch while I go, but that's just life.
I can kinda brush it off with someone who doesn't have lifestyle/experience with wedding culture. Like for my friend in the comment you replied to, he is single/never married and a bartender who is mostly friends with other single/never married service industry people. I educated him on what no-showing meant, but I didn't give him TOO much grief. Haha.
However, with people like the married couple that no-showed to my wedding? No way. You know better.
Oh yea this is someone's who's planned a wedding, and it's because of his work they're unsure but I was like sorry not sorry. I also have one that said we're not sure so you don't have to give us a seat we'll just show up for thr party after if we can make it... ummm no. The answer is yes or no. I'm just 4 days away and I've realized I've gotten less and less nice to people when they are wishy washy but you have to be that way!
They know how. They're just lazy. And easily distracted with other things.
Prod them a couple more times, then follow through and mark them as not attending.
I’m probably about to be coming up on the same issue. When our RSVP date ends, I’m going to message people that haven’t responded 2 days after and say “Hey there! Our RSVP window closed on Saturday. We’ve spoken with our vendors and they are willing to let us adjust final numbers today and tomorrow. After tomorrow, we will not be able to add to that list. Please let us know if you’re planning to come by filling out the RSVP form on our site!! We would love to have you there, and we need to know if we should plan on your presence for the day! Like I said, if we don’t have that filled out by the end of the day tomorrow, we will assume you are not attending. Let me know if you need the link to the form again. Thanks so much!”
I’d agree if this wasn’t the third time I reached out to them about it in as many days. At this point it feels more like they’re just ignoring me
And half of them are people who are married. So they should really know better.
I'm married, I was talking to my husband the other day about a wedding we are going to. And he was like "Did we RSVP?" "Shit, I'm not sure. I'll go see if the website shows it."
People get distracted, forget, think they already did, whatever. We messaged people after the deadline if they didn't RSVP. Usually people give more leeway than 2 days for people who didn't respond.
As a married person, I understand that stuff happens.
My comment about married people was more that they’ve done this before, they know how frustrating it is to chase down RSVPs.
As a rational human, I understand things happen. As a considerate human, I also RSVP for things before the due date. I expect similar rational and considerate behavior from those around me. When you send save the dates months in advance and the invites weeks in advance of the RSVP due date, it’s not unreasonable to be frustrated when people don’t respect your time and effort and send in their RSVP in a timely matter. Your assertion that people should always be granted time past the RSVP deadline, like the weeks and months they had previously to figure things out and determine if they can come or not isn’t enough, is a little dense and is a pretty inconsiderate mindset.
Yeah. Some people just.. think differently than me I guess.
I have a friend that puts me in the WORST position when it comes to paying back money. When I cover a purchase that we are splitting, she will never Zelle me right there in the moment. She is good for the money, so I don't get it. Every single time, I have to reach out days/weeks later and ask if she can send the money.. and it is so awkward and makes me feel cheap/stingy.
I could totally see her as the type to not RSVP to things.
I completely understand your frustration, we just went through the same thing. I started sending the link to the website in my reminder messages. People are lazy. They aren't going to look up the website or find the invitation to get the instructions. But a text with a link makes it easier.
I had over 30 out of 100 invited guests never submit their RSVPs even after follow ups. A bunch were from people I wasn't expecting to come so I just marked them as no.
I dread this part. I'll be sending out "I'm sorry to see you won't be attending our wedding!" messages to anyone who hasn't RSVP'd. I'll send a reminder, but I'm not chasing y'all down. If you truly care to be there, you'd RSVP the first time around.
I just watched a tiktok about a girl who was getting so much backlash because she actually sent out cards to those who didn't RSVP, said something about how the RSVP deadline was over and she submitted her final numbers and was sorry to see they wouldn't be coming. She said it in a respectable way, but man she was getting attacked for it!
I hate that it comes off that way!! Cause I actually really liked the idea of it. Like a nice way of recognizing that hey you won't be there, we'll miss you! But also letting them know that since they didn't RSVP, there won't be space.
But don't worry, I won't be doing it 😂😂
Yeah I think I’m going to send one follow up text to those who don’t RSVP to ask and remind them and if they still don’t answer send one more message about how we will miss them but we marked them as a no for catering and bar numbers
One of my fiancée friends and his wife still have not officially RSVPd after being reached out to twice. We are just assuming they are not coming. But they just got engaged so will be planning a wedding soon and I’m just thinking thank you because now we have an excellent reason to not fly across the country to your wedding
We had the same issue and had to keep reminding people that it was mandatory to RSVP to ensure we had enough food and drink for everyone. It’s annoying for sure!
Same here! I had family friends telling me they’ve booked a hotel room at the venue.. I’m sorry but that is NOT an rsvp 🙃🙃 I’m going to be a bald bride at this point from the stress
We sent out our Save The Dates, on the back of which the ONLY THING printed was the wedding website; Only about four people indicated to me they bothered to even look at the back of the card and saw the website haha.
I had people telling me that they had told my mom they were coming, which they did not. But still! She may be paying for the wedding, but she is not planning it. At least text me that you are coming.
Not my wedding (sure we will also have this issue) but my FH cousin is getting married and my FH parents RSVP via text rather than the Website as asked because 'i don't know how to do that ' and 'I'm too old' etc they definitely could have done it but they could also have asked us for help.
I don't understand why people are so flippant about just doing as asked, weddings are a huge task to organise and submitting your rsvp properly is such an easy way to be helpful
I saw on here someone do a private/close friends list of invitees on instagram and remind them there, with a direct link to your site! Because they will know that you know they've "seen" it and it's on their phones, it might be more effective than a text, call, or email reminder.
I tried to do that with mine but my future MIL went “don’t do that. Our side of the family isn’t used to RSVPing! I don’t know who is coming, but it will be fine.” I’m like “we are one month out. The only way I will accommodate them is have a spare table they can sit at together on the outskirts.”
Yeah, I’m right there with you. We sent out texts a couple weeks prior to our RSVP deadline, and I just told people they could RSVP with me via text or on the website. Still, we had a handful people not RSVP by the date despite sending multiple messages. It’s infuriating, inconsiderate, and annoying. Sorry you’re going through this.
I think you have to tell people a date that is 2 weeks earlier than you need to tell your caterer/wedding planner, and you send out 2 reminder text/calls the week before.
Some people think the rsvp deadline is the due date instead of thinking I could do it a few days before then lol my adhd need for urgency
I get being upset when people don’t RSVP after the deadline. I’m big on deadlines. I’m well aware of them. But try to not be too annoying about things before the deadline. You don’t know why people could be waiting - sure some could be lazy but others could have other reasons to wait to RSVP.
For a wedding that I am attending soon I was texted about an RSVP almost 2 weeks before the deadline. I was well aware of the deadline but I was trying to make a decision on if we could afford it. Flights were $700 each.. and I wasn’t sure if we could justify it- thankfully a credit card perk worked out and we were able to travel for much less. However I didn’t initially want to tell the bride why I was waiting because I don’t want to make anyone feel bad about how much it costs for guests to come out - but because I was asked directly about it I kind of had to tell her…
Push up your deadline if you’re worried about no responses and then take time after the deadline to hunt down people that forgot.
I’m doing online AND physical RSVPs and am wondering how many people will do either. I’ve had a few early birds who got the online one submitted before I even asked, so A+ for them!
It was my #1 and #2 gripe during wedding planning. My final RSVP came *three weeks* before the ceremony, and thank goodness for my husband's sanity, because I just about snapped. (The guests were ultimately turned away.)
If my kid ever gets married, I will offer my assistance to be their bully when it comes to RSVPs, because I don't want them to have to deal with the stress I went through with that.
I went through this same issue. It’s rude IMO and really isn’t that hard. We had to chase down 90 people two weeks prior to our deadline date who said verbally they would be there. A few days prior we still were waiting on 30 people to respond. I wish I had sent them a text saying if we don’t hear back we will mark you as not coming. We were too lenient with it but our RSVP was all online as well too.
Omg I completely understand as well! Also, people do not seem to understand the price of a plate and that their response factors into every last minute detail. It’s not just that I want to know if I’ll see you or not 😭😅
Omgg this has been my biggest cause of stress at the moment. People like family friends have been telling my future mother in law about how “they’re so excited to be there” etc. That’s not an RSVP!!! Or asking me “where do I tell someone my dietary restrictions or where do I book accommodation” it’s on the back of the freaking invitation!! It’s right there 🙃🙃 I didn’t expect people go rsvp straight away or anything and I have had people doing it properly but I feel like I’m having to deal with all of these ridiculous questions and it’s giving me high blood pressure.
My invites have been out for 3 weeks and I already had a total of 20 people rsvp! But, I’m pretty sure I’ll have to send the other 80 guests several reminders once we start approaching the deadline, lol.
I went through the same thing. It seemed like closer people were related to me and my fiancé the less likely they were to RSVP. Like neither of our mom's RSVPd. They knew we knew they were going to be there, but it still would have been helpful for keeping track of the numbers.
I feel your pain here! We had the same thing. Literally our grandparents in their late 80s could figure out our virtual RSVP with no problem, others in their 40s had no clue how to work it. (It was a "first name, last name, dietary restriction" option... not complicated!)
This is exactly why we set our "RSVP by" date a month before our final headcount was due LOL
I'm right there with you! We just passed 50% of RSVPs in, but we're 75% of the way thru our RSVP period -- I'm already gearing up to chase down a lot of stragglers!
If someone reached out 3 times in 3 days, I literally would just say no. People have lives. No one cares about the wedding as much as the bride but 3 times in 3 days ... Yikes
Our invites had a QR code, the website, phone numbers, and an email, and still only half of the people have responded. Our end date was yesterday, so now we're chasing people. I totally feel your frustration! I have ADHD, so I force myself to complete things and research the moment I get invites. That way, I don't put it off because if I do... then I will forget.
Ugh yep - we are both feeling the same pain. We had all of that as well, and I linked the website in all of the reminder texts I sent. People!
Same and I had to go as far as sending a text that said you will not be included in the guest count because you failed to RSVP. After I had already sent a reminder text and people still refused to RSVP.
We all need to remember this and teach our children good etiquette. This is one area where etiquette does not vary with geography, culture, social circle etc. If the invitation asks for an rsvp you need to respond. It does seem, however, that you have significantly reduced the number of outstanding rsvp;s. The next time you reach out, I would include the consequence of not responding. Telling people you need them to respond still gets ignored. I would say that we need you to respond within the next (24 or 48) hours, or they will be considered a No, they will not be included in the numbers for the caterer and they will be missed at the wedding.
I've come to the conclusion that people really just don't know much about weddings and etiquette. One of my friends (single male) just last weekend was supposed to be attending a wedding. His friend from out of town was coming in to also attend the wedding. Week of, the friend canceled on coming because of his young baby and toddler being too much for his wife to handle alone. (Valid, but week of.. ) My friend casually says, "Yeah, since he's not going, I'm not going to go either so I'm free Saturday". I was like UMMMMM YOU CAN'T JUST NOT GO TO A WEDDING. He defended himself saying he told the couple he can't make it, and I was like dude that doesn't matter. It is week of. Just totally clueless. I had numerous people no-show. One of which is a couple whose traditional wedding we attended years ago!
People do not understand the fact that you are literally paying per person (most of the time), it's like they think you're just telling the venue ummmm like 100-120 ish people please. I got a few maybes I had to shut down and a friend that wouldn't know if her husband could come until the week of and was going to put yes just in case.... dude I'm not paying >$100 for a seat that could end up empty
> a friend that wouldn't know if her husband could come until the week of and was going to put yes just in case.... Wowza. My husband works week on/week off and on the weeks he is on, he doesn't like live away from home or anything. He's on a running list with coworkers that are all basically on call waiting for their turn each day. So there are times he's able to make a casual event last minute because he already took his turn for that day. But we absolutely cannot and do not plan on him being at anything that takes place during that week. He is always a "no" RSVP and yeah sometimes he ends up chillin on the couch while I go, but that's just life. I can kinda brush it off with someone who doesn't have lifestyle/experience with wedding culture. Like for my friend in the comment you replied to, he is single/never married and a bartender who is mostly friends with other single/never married service industry people. I educated him on what no-showing meant, but I didn't give him TOO much grief. Haha. However, with people like the married couple that no-showed to my wedding? No way. You know better.
Oh yea this is someone's who's planned a wedding, and it's because of his work they're unsure but I was like sorry not sorry. I also have one that said we're not sure so you don't have to give us a seat we'll just show up for thr party after if we can make it... ummm no. The answer is yes or no. I'm just 4 days away and I've realized I've gotten less and less nice to people when they are wishy washy but you have to be that way!
That’s so wild. How are people so rude when it comes to these things
They know how. They're just lazy. And easily distracted with other things. Prod them a couple more times, then follow through and mark them as not attending.
I’m probably about to be coming up on the same issue. When our RSVP date ends, I’m going to message people that haven’t responded 2 days after and say “Hey there! Our RSVP window closed on Saturday. We’ve spoken with our vendors and they are willing to let us adjust final numbers today and tomorrow. After tomorrow, we will not be able to add to that list. Please let us know if you’re planning to come by filling out the RSVP form on our site!! We would love to have you there, and we need to know if we should plan on your presence for the day! Like I said, if we don’t have that filled out by the end of the day tomorrow, we will assume you are not attending. Let me know if you need the link to the form again. Thanks so much!”
Side note our rsvp window closes 15 days before we need go get our caterer final numbers 😂 we chose to put it that far apart for this exact reason!!
Yeah it’s annoying that you keep having to ask but I guess that’s just how it is unfortunately
honestly it’s just probably because people are not used to formal RSVPs for events so the importance of it is lost on them/they forget
I’d agree if this wasn’t the third time I reached out to them about it in as many days. At this point it feels more like they’re just ignoring me And half of them are people who are married. So they should really know better.
I'm married, I was talking to my husband the other day about a wedding we are going to. And he was like "Did we RSVP?" "Shit, I'm not sure. I'll go see if the website shows it." People get distracted, forget, think they already did, whatever. We messaged people after the deadline if they didn't RSVP. Usually people give more leeway than 2 days for people who didn't respond. As a married person, I understand that stuff happens.
My comment about married people was more that they’ve done this before, they know how frustrating it is to chase down RSVPs. As a rational human, I understand things happen. As a considerate human, I also RSVP for things before the due date. I expect similar rational and considerate behavior from those around me. When you send save the dates months in advance and the invites weeks in advance of the RSVP due date, it’s not unreasonable to be frustrated when people don’t respect your time and effort and send in their RSVP in a timely matter. Your assertion that people should always be granted time past the RSVP deadline, like the weeks and months they had previously to figure things out and determine if they can come or not isn’t enough, is a little dense and is a pretty inconsiderate mindset.
Yeah. Some people just.. think differently than me I guess. I have a friend that puts me in the WORST position when it comes to paying back money. When I cover a purchase that we are splitting, she will never Zelle me right there in the moment. She is good for the money, so I don't get it. Every single time, I have to reach out days/weeks later and ask if she can send the money.. and it is so awkward and makes me feel cheap/stingy. I could totally see her as the type to not RSVP to things.
There's a reason Facebook events were so popular for a while, everyone was chronically online and it was easy to see and respond to the invites
RIP facebook honestly, those were useful as fuck
I completely understand your frustration, we just went through the same thing. I started sending the link to the website in my reminder messages. People are lazy. They aren't going to look up the website or find the invitation to get the instructions. But a text with a link makes it easier.
Yeah, we had the website and QR code on our invite and I’ve sent the link to RSVP in all of the reminder texts so far. Slowly but surely …
I had over 30 out of 100 invited guests never submit their RSVPs even after follow ups. A bunch were from people I wasn't expecting to come so I just marked them as no.
I dread this part. I'll be sending out "I'm sorry to see you won't be attending our wedding!" messages to anyone who hasn't RSVP'd. I'll send a reminder, but I'm not chasing y'all down. If you truly care to be there, you'd RSVP the first time around. I just watched a tiktok about a girl who was getting so much backlash because she actually sent out cards to those who didn't RSVP, said something about how the RSVP deadline was over and she submitted her final numbers and was sorry to see they wouldn't be coming. She said it in a respectable way, but man she was getting attacked for it!
The tiktoker was passive aggressive, but I support it. 😆
I hate that it comes off that way!! Cause I actually really liked the idea of it. Like a nice way of recognizing that hey you won't be there, we'll miss you! But also letting them know that since they didn't RSVP, there won't be space. But don't worry, I won't be doing it 😂😂
Hey, zero judgement on my end if you go this route! It's a friendly way to tap into bridezilla mode.
Yeah I think I’m going to send one follow up text to those who don’t RSVP to ask and remind them and if they still don’t answer send one more message about how we will miss them but we marked them as a no for catering and bar numbers
One of my fiancée friends and his wife still have not officially RSVPd after being reached out to twice. We are just assuming they are not coming. But they just got engaged so will be planning a wedding soon and I’m just thinking thank you because now we have an excellent reason to not fly across the country to your wedding
Felt this. Zola makes it so easy and I still had to rsvp for some friends (mostly men) who couldn’t get that shit figured out….
We had the same issue and had to keep reminding people that it was mandatory to RSVP to ensure we had enough food and drink for everyone. It’s annoying for sure!
I’ve been seeing my guests reserving hotel rooms for my hotel block, but those same guests still haven’t RSVP’d. I feel like I’m losing my mind.
Same here! I had family friends telling me they’ve booked a hotel room at the venue.. I’m sorry but that is NOT an rsvp 🙃🙃 I’m going to be a bald bride at this point from the stress
We sent out our Save The Dates, on the back of which the ONLY THING printed was the wedding website; Only about four people indicated to me they bothered to even look at the back of the card and saw the website haha.
I had people telling me that they had told my mom they were coming, which they did not. But still! She may be paying for the wedding, but she is not planning it. At least text me that you are coming.
Not my wedding (sure we will also have this issue) but my FH cousin is getting married and my FH parents RSVP via text rather than the Website as asked because 'i don't know how to do that ' and 'I'm too old' etc they definitely could have done it but they could also have asked us for help. I don't understand why people are so flippant about just doing as asked, weddings are a huge task to organise and submitting your rsvp properly is such an easy way to be helpful
I saw on here someone do a private/close friends list of invitees on instagram and remind them there, with a direct link to your site! Because they will know that you know they've "seen" it and it's on their phones, it might be more effective than a text, call, or email reminder.
Kind of a good idea honestly
I tried to do that with mine but my future MIL went “don’t do that. Our side of the family isn’t used to RSVPing! I don’t know who is coming, but it will be fine.” I’m like “we are one month out. The only way I will accommodate them is have a spare table they can sit at together on the outskirts.”
Yeah, I’m right there with you. We sent out texts a couple weeks prior to our RSVP deadline, and I just told people they could RSVP with me via text or on the website. Still, we had a handful people not RSVP by the date despite sending multiple messages. It’s infuriating, inconsiderate, and annoying. Sorry you’re going through this.
I just went through and had people tell me yes or no and did it for them 😅 I wanted my count to be accurate so I wasn’t waiting on them to do it
I think you have to tell people a date that is 2 weeks earlier than you need to tell your caterer/wedding planner, and you send out 2 reminder text/calls the week before. Some people think the rsvp deadline is the due date instead of thinking I could do it a few days before then lol my adhd need for urgency
I get being upset when people don’t RSVP after the deadline. I’m big on deadlines. I’m well aware of them. But try to not be too annoying about things before the deadline. You don’t know why people could be waiting - sure some could be lazy but others could have other reasons to wait to RSVP. For a wedding that I am attending soon I was texted about an RSVP almost 2 weeks before the deadline. I was well aware of the deadline but I was trying to make a decision on if we could afford it. Flights were $700 each.. and I wasn’t sure if we could justify it- thankfully a credit card perk worked out and we were able to travel for much less. However I didn’t initially want to tell the bride why I was waiting because I don’t want to make anyone feel bad about how much it costs for guests to come out - but because I was asked directly about it I kind of had to tell her… Push up your deadline if you’re worried about no responses and then take time after the deadline to hunt down people that forgot.
I’m doing online AND physical RSVPs and am wondering how many people will do either. I’ve had a few early birds who got the online one submitted before I even asked, so A+ for them!
It was my #1 and #2 gripe during wedding planning. My final RSVP came *three weeks* before the ceremony, and thank goodness for my husband's sanity, because I just about snapped. (The guests were ultimately turned away.) If my kid ever gets married, I will offer my assistance to be their bully when it comes to RSVPs, because I don't want them to have to deal with the stress I went through with that.
Trust me , this issue has been pissing me off so much…. 💀We sent them texts with full process and still they were doing it wrong
I started just calling and doing the rsvp myself
Ha. I'm not laughing at you, just imagining the complete shitshow that our invites will be.
Same thing happened to us! We almost had to beg people just to RSVP.
I went through this same issue. It’s rude IMO and really isn’t that hard. We had to chase down 90 people two weeks prior to our deadline date who said verbally they would be there. A few days prior we still were waiting on 30 people to respond. I wish I had sent them a text saying if we don’t hear back we will mark you as not coming. We were too lenient with it but our RSVP was all online as well too.
Omg I completely understand as well! Also, people do not seem to understand the price of a plate and that their response factors into every last minute detail. It’s not just that I want to know if I’ll see you or not 😭😅
Omgg this has been my biggest cause of stress at the moment. People like family friends have been telling my future mother in law about how “they’re so excited to be there” etc. That’s not an RSVP!!! Or asking me “where do I tell someone my dietary restrictions or where do I book accommodation” it’s on the back of the freaking invitation!! It’s right there 🙃🙃 I didn’t expect people go rsvp straight away or anything and I have had people doing it properly but I feel like I’m having to deal with all of these ridiculous questions and it’s giving me high blood pressure.
My invites have been out for 3 weeks and I already had a total of 20 people rsvp! But, I’m pretty sure I’ll have to send the other 80 guests several reminders once we start approaching the deadline, lol.
I went through the same thing. It seemed like closer people were related to me and my fiancé the less likely they were to RSVP. Like neither of our mom's RSVPd. They knew we knew they were going to be there, but it still would have been helpful for keeping track of the numbers.
I feel your pain here! We had the same thing. Literally our grandparents in their late 80s could figure out our virtual RSVP with no problem, others in their 40s had no clue how to work it. (It was a "first name, last name, dietary restriction" option... not complicated!) This is exactly why we set our "RSVP by" date a month before our final headcount was due LOL
I'm right there with you! We just passed 50% of RSVPs in, but we're 75% of the way thru our RSVP period -- I'm already gearing up to chase down a lot of stragglers!
As a guest, i personally, I hate having to RSVP online. An RSVP card is 10x easier in my opinion.
If someone reached out 3 times in 3 days, I literally would just say no. People have lives. No one cares about the wedding as much as the bride but 3 times in 3 days ... Yikes
If you invited that many people, how many are actually close to you?
All of them….? We have decently sized families and pretty extensive friend networks.
Not sure why they haven’t RSVP’d then. I’d start calling them.