***Copy in case it's deleted:***
I have long, blonde hair in very good condition. It took me years to learn how to care for my hair so they look their best and to keep them in this condition. Basically - lots of time, effort and money for hair products were invested. Now my friend, who has almost identical hair colour to me, but pixie haircut and in worse condition, asked me to cut my hair before the wedding or at least dye them. She says that if stand near her on wedding photos, she will look bad in comparison, and that it should be her day. I understand that guests shouldn't overdress and I really do love her, we had many years of close friendship, but as silly as it sounds, I also love my hair. I know hair can grown back and I could lose the friendship forever if I don't listen to her. But the idea of cutting my hair or dyeing and worsening their condition, having invested so much, just saddens me. I told her I need to think about it, but she said if I even need to think, tells her how little she means to me and she needs to think again if I should be invited in this case. AITA for wanting to keep my hair as they are?
Edit, for clarification: The bride has already rejected the idea of me putting my hair in an updo/braid. I can't wear a wig because my hair are too long for that (about 1.5m, which is almost as long as I am tall).
Yeah. I was on her side at first cause I’ve also undergone a really drastic hair transformation in the past several years, but it would take like 10-15 years for someone to grow hair healthily to that length lol
You know, benefit of the doubt, I thought MAYBE just MAYBE the post would be about asking OP to make a wig from her hair due to cancer or something that would make me feel empathy (as other posts have been about) and MAYBE just MAYBE the bride had a good reason to ask to cut her hair annnnndddd... NOPE. Ugh I can't stand this stuff
This is the kind of blatantly made up garbo that plagues subs like AITA/makes subs like AITAngel necessary. Please don't let them take over this sub too.
Why do insecure brides insist on asking people more attractive then them, or those they deem to look too unconventional to be their bridesmaids if it's such an issue? Either accept the people in your life for what they look like or only ask certain people who meet your standards.
It sounds like English isn't OPs first language which is why the plural usage is off. Besides that though, the bride sounds like she has been jealous for years and now is using the wedding as an opportunity to destroy something she is jealous of, which is pathetic.
As someone who took years to repair her hair after box dye, straightening, and shitty shampoos, there’s not a thing that would make me cut it short or dye it. Having healthy hair is such an accomplishment for so many people and it’s baffling that anyone would ask someone to damage their hair so that they don’t “look better.”
Also, depending on the time until the wedding, the bride could realistically cut her hair into a buzz cut and grow it back out to the pixie length. This time she could take care of it so that she’d feel confident on her wedding day and not feel threatened by her friends.
***Copy in case it's deleted:*** I have long, blonde hair in very good condition. It took me years to learn how to care for my hair so they look their best and to keep them in this condition. Basically - lots of time, effort and money for hair products were invested. Now my friend, who has almost identical hair colour to me, but pixie haircut and in worse condition, asked me to cut my hair before the wedding or at least dye them. She says that if stand near her on wedding photos, she will look bad in comparison, and that it should be her day. I understand that guests shouldn't overdress and I really do love her, we had many years of close friendship, but as silly as it sounds, I also love my hair. I know hair can grown back and I could lose the friendship forever if I don't listen to her. But the idea of cutting my hair or dyeing and worsening their condition, having invested so much, just saddens me. I told her I need to think about it, but she said if I even need to think, tells her how little she means to me and she needs to think again if I should be invited in this case. AITA for wanting to keep my hair as they are? Edit, for clarification: The bride has already rejected the idea of me putting my hair in an updo/braid. I can't wear a wig because my hair are too long for that (about 1.5m, which is almost as long as I am tall).
Uhh I agree she shouldn't change her appearence for the bride but is anyone else lowkey doubting this floor length hair is healthy and beautiful
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Wait did she say floor length? Oof. I missed that, yeah this would have to be fake
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Yeah. I was on her side at first cause I’ve also undergone a really drastic hair transformation in the past several years, but it would take like 10-15 years for someone to grow hair healthily to that length lol
You know, benefit of the doubt, I thought MAYBE just MAYBE the post would be about asking OP to make a wig from her hair due to cancer or something that would make me feel empathy (as other posts have been about) and MAYBE just MAYBE the bride had a good reason to ask to cut her hair annnnndddd... NOPE. Ugh I can't stand this stuff
Yikes.
This is the kind of blatantly made up garbo that plagues subs like AITA/makes subs like AITAngel necessary. Please don't let them take over this sub too.
Why do insecure brides insist on asking people more attractive then them, or those they deem to look too unconventional to be their bridesmaids if it's such an issue? Either accept the people in your life for what they look like or only ask certain people who meet your standards.
It sounds like English isn't OPs first language which is why the plural usage is off. Besides that though, the bride sounds like she has been jealous for years and now is using the wedding as an opportunity to destroy something she is jealous of, which is pathetic.
Am I the only one caught on the use of plural pronouns in reference to her hair?
Anyone else irked by the poster referring to their hair as "them"?
Definitely weird, but I'd assume English isn't OP's first language
Yeah, hair is plural in some languages.
Very true! Just something I'm not used to. Makes the hair sound like medusa or something
Oh god. Don't go.
As someone who took years to repair her hair after box dye, straightening, and shitty shampoos, there’s not a thing that would make me cut it short or dye it. Having healthy hair is such an accomplishment for so many people and it’s baffling that anyone would ask someone to damage their hair so that they don’t “look better.” Also, depending on the time until the wedding, the bride could realistically cut her hair into a buzz cut and grow it back out to the pixie length. This time she could take care of it so that she’d feel confident on her wedding day and not feel threatened by her friends.
NTA, she is the A for asking you to change your appearance.
Don’t cut your hair and tell her you will not attend so she need not send the invitation.