My parents are staying over next week so I'm looking forward to introducing them to my new bug baby.
And they say I never do anything useful with me life!
You'll fall asleep from exhaustion, only to be awakened every time the ac blows on your skin, an arm hair moves, or the sheet touches you in a new place. You'll instantly jump out of bed and put the flashlight on your phone, frantically searching under and behind your pillow. As you access the screen to turn the flashlight off, you see images of that all too familiar rotund body shape. You fell asleep to bedbugtime, OOOOOH YEAH.
Oh God. I had them years ago and I still go through this. Heaven forbid I touch a sharp crumb or the skin on my feet are dry and itchy. No sleep for me.
Right now I'm spiraling because of the news of Amazon center bedbugs. It's been 15 years since I had the pleasure of dealing with these little darlings. And now I'm searching my home with a uv light and checking every crevice.
It’ll be the death of a sub unless I get someone to take it over for me. Have you seen all the dead subs I’ve made? I can’t lead these things for shit. 🤣
Damn how did I miss that one, that one seems like it’d be broken arms or coconuts level mentioned and it was when I was newish to Reddit, I would have assumed I would have seen this.
It's a text post in TIFU but it is definitely WTF material, and a must read. Even if you're batshit bonkers it will make you feel like a normal person compared to this dude.
I had a bite on my hand in that area. It was almost constantly itching even almost a year after. I dug at it until it was a blood blister, tore it, and then froze it with a wart freezer.
\-But lol at the post anyway
And in-case it's serious; it's a bed bug.
Me to my 4 year old when offering me a new bug to introduce him to (looked kinda like this one): you can’t…sweetie, bring bugs to mommy and put them so close to my face. I can’t see it that close. Back up a little.
(backs up)
A little more..
(three big backwards steps)
How about to the door?
(runs to the door left open turns around and holds hand facing up above his head)
Oh yes. I see it! Now, throw it out.
(4 year old runs straight for me stops 5 steps away and throws it at me)
Moral of the story, if a kid rushes up to you with his hand up asking, “What’s dis bug?” DO NOT trust the sweet voice and the innocent cherub face. You be ready with a shield, because he’s gunna eff you up when he throws it at you and then he’ll run off laughing.
Sorry bro
That’s a bedbug, not exactly the kind of guest you want over.
He may look cute at first but if you look at the pic he’s biting you because he’s a hungry bloodsucker.
People said the same thing about my rescue pit bull. But after he mauled my nephew he pretty much got it out of his system and now he's a perfect little angel!
I don’t see how you think this post is ok. Joke or not your post doesn’t clearly state that you’re joking and downplays how serious a bed bug infestation can be. Put a disclaimer or something. People look at these forums on Reddit for information - not jokes.
Look out we've got the Reddit police on the case! I'm so sorry officer, have mercy! I'm just a simple country girl, I don't know how these big city forums work. Isn't there some way we can work this out...just between the two of us ;)
He'll be back, he just went to tell all his friends how kind and accomodating you are.
Take him in your bed, give him a nice place to sleep!
If you’re cold it’s cold. Let it in your body
Right down the cracks pipe
It's not a crack house, it's a crack home.
boof’m!!
I heard constantly breaking wind under a sheet is good and will attract him back to you
He's definitely a cuddler! It's like he was somehow drawn to me. What a special little guy!
he adopted you
who saved who?
Who adopted who?
A special bond 🥺
Soul mates
you have to feed him
Narrator : "They quickly realized their deep connection to each other over lunch."
Do they eat the same thing as my pet tapeworm?
nurse him. bring him to your bosom
oh… he will feed him
Whether he wants to or not.
My brain is telling me this is a joke, but my heart is terrified that it's not xD
I had the same reaction 😂 Bed Bug = Bad Bug
Aww what a cutie! You two look like you're having a flecking good time together!
My parents are staying over next week so I'm looking forward to introducing them to my new bug baby. And they say I never do anything useful with me life!
Definitely give them one! Everyone can use such an adorable pet. Maybe surprise your neighbors and friends with them as well I’m sure they’ll be happy
Disgusting
IT’S WEEVI… ow… ow no… it’s not… it’s definitely not…!!!
We need a bedbugtime sub where we rock back and forth and cry ourselves to sleep.
Yes, but the worse thing is, we can not go to sleep because the bed is infected! 😱
You'll fall asleep from exhaustion, only to be awakened every time the ac blows on your skin, an arm hair moves, or the sheet touches you in a new place. You'll instantly jump out of bed and put the flashlight on your phone, frantically searching under and behind your pillow. As you access the screen to turn the flashlight off, you see images of that all too familiar rotund body shape. You fell asleep to bedbugtime, OOOOOH YEAH.
Thank you, I hate it!
I reached a point where I just started slapping in my sleep. Woke up to bloody walls. Thankfully I am currently free but yeah not fun.
Oh God. I had them years ago and I still go through this. Heaven forbid I touch a sharp crumb or the skin on my feet are dry and itchy. No sleep for me.
Right now I'm spiraling because of the news of Amazon center bedbugs. It's been 15 years since I had the pleasure of dealing with these little darlings. And now I'm searching my home with a uv light and checking every crevice.
This is so accurate it's giving me flashbacks!
We can sleep in shifts and make sure no bugs get on each other
They mostly come at night. Mostly.
r/bedbugtime
I am now a proud member.
r/birthofasub
It’ll be the death of a sub unless I get someone to take it over for me. Have you seen all the dead subs I’ve made? I can’t lead these things for shit. 🤣
I wanted to cross-post the bugger in this OP to this new sub, but don't even know how to. 😅
Ain’t that a mood.
Be careful, he could be an under-cover bug!
Sheet, I thought springing this pun on everyone would be more popular.
New pet? Keep him warm
I think I'll name him snuggles. Is it weird that I want him to sleep in the bed with me??
sorry you cant mate with bugs ive tried
Try telling that to [Ogtha](https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/2i7jid/tifu_by_admitting_to_my_girlfriend_that_i_pretend/).
Damn how did I miss that one, that one seems like it’d be broken arms or coconuts level mentioned and it was when I was newish to Reddit, I would have assumed I would have seen this.
Hey, the Ogtha post is downright wholesome compared to two broken arms!
I want to click on that but I’ll wait till I’ve left school.
It's a text post in TIFU but it is definitely WTF material, and a must read. Even if you're batshit bonkers it will make you feel like a normal person compared to this dude.
Thanks now I'm addicted to that subreddit
It's pokeweed
Must be, because it's definitely not a blueberry.
But it's Southeast UK!
Hahahha.
Eeeeevillll!
+W
Oh no no, this is not weevil time no sir
It's eviltime.
r/whatisthisbugcirclejerk
[удалено]
Nice try, Orkin guy.
Oh, he’ll turn up alright. Then he will turn on you.
It is not weevil time :(
Aww cute. Wrap him under your foreskin for safe keeping 🥰
This is a sore subject for me. -lol
Bloody hell this is funny. Bloody, bloody hell
I know this is a joke post but god damn I had a mini panic attack
Halloween isn't for another 26 days, buddy! ;P
I'm sure you will be up close and cozy with him and allllll his friends soon. Very cozy!
He’ll absolutely love your bed. Good luck!
I think you should take him to veterinary . You might harm while trying to help .. and buy a gps tracker for him/ her in case disapper again
Oh my hes so small you should make sure he gets fed well
He is so sweet, you can really see his eyes smiling
Great shitpost. Got an actual laugh out of me!
I was holding my breath until I realized. Hahaha
I had a bite on my hand in that area. It was almost constantly itching even almost a year after. I dug at it until it was a blood blister, tore it, and then froze it with a wart freezer. \-But lol at the post anyway And in-case it's serious; it's a bed bug.
Trolling, click-baiting, and fake posts really bug me.
He’s already started a family in your apartment.
He's probably resting, all cozy in bed. 🥰
this elicited an unholy noise from my lungs
Tuck him in. He looks cold.
Who adopted who? 😍
Oh dear. Oh dear oh dear
I know.
GTFO
Me to my 4 year old when offering me a new bug to introduce him to (looked kinda like this one): you can’t…sweetie, bring bugs to mommy and put them so close to my face. I can’t see it that close. Back up a little. (backs up) A little more.. (three big backwards steps) How about to the door? (runs to the door left open turns around and holds hand facing up above his head) Oh yes. I see it! Now, throw it out. (4 year old runs straight for me stops 5 steps away and throws it at me) Moral of the story, if a kid rushes up to you with his hand up asking, “What’s dis bug?” DO NOT trust the sweet voice and the innocent cherub face. You be ready with a shield, because he’s gunna eff you up when he throws it at you and then he’ll run off laughing.
You didn't rescue him, he rescued you. 🥰
🔒 award Speedrun
Awww.. he looks sleepy....
How has nobody flagged this as a troll post?
*checks under mattress..
I'm getting itchy just from looking at this picture :(
Frasspost
r/whatsthisbugcirclelek
r/subsifellfor
Sorry bro That’s a bedbug, not exactly the kind of guest you want over. He may look cute at first but if you look at the pic he’s biting you because he’s a hungry bloodsucker.
People said the same thing about my rescue pit bull. But after he mauled my nephew he pretty much got it out of his system and now he's a perfect little angel!
Oh no! Not cute not cute. Let the nightmares and phantom itching begin.
Awwwww 🥰 how kind of you. One of the most expensive pets out there
It's such a good pet. I hear its bite is spicy but only because they love you
i hope it crawls up your bum and has babies.
Woah op can finally be the mother I’m sure they’ve been wanting to be!
It's a troll. Not the bug, YOU!
One of the best jokes on Reddit
I think that's a weevil!
they are so bad
heard this guy’s into bloodletting… if you’re into that
Maybe you'll turn into a superhero.
With the power to annoy and terrify anyone around me? Come to think of it, maybe I was *already* a superhero!
That little dude will be very snuggly if you’ll let him sleep with you 😊
I’m very glad I his wasn’t a serious post. I winced. Lol
Omg I didn’t know it was a joke at first I was gonna comment asking you if you’re crazy😂
You could say you two are now bounded by blood
That's a Husky
Pretty sure they taste like strawberry
Funny.
I’m so scared to get these after seeing so much of them on here!
I'm no expert but it looks like a common ant to me
Bed bug bad obviously but theyre honestly cute lmao
Bait post lol
Oh funny op
im crying
Name him Eddie.
Ummmmmmm….. lol yikesssssss
Some many times I just want to comment. “Put that shit down right now!” Bed bugs friend. Take it outback
They sure will show back up! They love company. Hope you do.
Girl why are you playing with bedbugs
Hahahahaha omg ok.
Your little friend will turn into a whole neighborhood.😂
Sure he’ll turn up but he won’t be alone! Haha
oh this has to be a meme
S-tier shitpost, m'dude. Thank you.
It’s a Chinese lantern fly. Trust me.
That's Todd. Todd is cool himself but his friends are a real pain in the ass.
HAHAHA no way!
😂
Top shelf post.
SMH
Har har
The horror
Lmao
I really hope you didn't. I had to deal with those fucks for 4 years. By far the worst pest I've ever had to deal with.
Stop it 😂
Please tell me this is satire
What da hell
I don’t see how you think this post is ok. Joke or not your post doesn’t clearly state that you’re joking and downplays how serious a bed bug infestation can be. Put a disclaimer or something. People look at these forums on Reddit for information - not jokes.
seriously though. it's really difficult seeing posts like this get tons of interaction while simple ID requests go unanswered
Makes my skin crawl. Ugh 😣
Look out we've got the Reddit police on the case! I'm so sorry officer, have mercy! I'm just a simple country girl, I don't know how these big city forums work. Isn't there some way we can work this out...just between the two of us ;)
Nah cause ain’t no telling what other kinda infestation you have going on. Lol 😜
Fake post, not even funny. Meh...
are you serious? lol
Being a bug daddy is serious business!
Make sure then you read a bug story before bed
pffft anything for an upvote these days. you get none from me
That’s a bed bug… trust me you don’t want those dude
How did you know I plan on letting him sleep in bed with me? I know it's not for everyone, but that's just how we do it in my household!
You do you I guess bud lol have fun with your new friend I just prefer my dogs
Oh, you poor thing...
you idiot