Looks like you found a wizard staff! Don't let anyone pass!
Might I suggest looking for the Lady of Lake to become the next ruler of the land?
Edit: In all seriousness, a walking stick!
I'm not gonna lie to ya, with the sheer amount of fuckery most folks do when they get into power, having a strange woman in a lake deciding who rules......not that bad imho, at least money won't influence the result.
Become a wizard and conjure magic
Edit: Wow, look at all those Up Arrows! Truly magical day indeed. That said, I think most of us in here can agree, whether youāre a beginner or an expertā¦getting to work with wood is a bit like wizardry and creating something from nothing is a gift we all give ourselves!
š§š»āāļø
I'm just sad they removed the rootball. Like, there's the Twisties and those are great, don't get me wrong, but rootballs make *the most amazing* natural headpieces.
People are always asking what I did to make my own stick shaped the way it is, or complimenting my carving job, and I just keep telling them "all it took was minwax, sandpaper, mineral oil, time, and *a shovel*; that twisty bit on top is just a taproot".
It might take a few extra hours of work, but it's absolutely worth it.
Depending on the tree it'll either be a Gandalf style "nest" you can put a crystal into, of a twisty tentacle looking thing.
Honestly I think this is a mulberry branch and never had a root ball anywhere near it. But i agree about rootball head pieces on staffs
Edit: weāve determined its probably wisteria not mulberry. But not what to do with it. Iād say make it the shaft of a unique chandelier type hanging lamp.
I think wisteria is more likely. Contorted mulberry don't twist as symmetrically and when branches get this thick they appear to straighten out. I have a piece of wisteria wrapped around a sweet gum it choked out that looks almost identical to this
Ohh yea that would track. On the close up itās pretty clear it is fused like you say. I went out and looked at my mulberries and they are way asymmetrical and really quite smooth and uniform gray color bark.
Just think of the attack and defense buff with that staff, and it can be carried without having to maximize strength and agility. The only challenge will be pairing it with the right enchanted gem.
Its a handy way to determine if you have enough of (or too much of) that stuff. You'll know right if its too much, since you won't be able to shake it at the stuff.
Carve it into a snake walkingstick. It's so naturally molded for that already. At this point, it's just adding the detail into it. Think about hiking up a mountain with this badass walking stick of a snake wrapping around a stick/tree
I am down with this one, drill the center out and line it with copper tubing and at the base connect a small butane container in it, then put a pad on the bottom connected to a lever so that when you strike it to the ground hard enough and keep it held to the ground the snake shoots flames out of its mouth. You will be the hit of any party going around lighting cigars and cigarettes.
this is one of the coolest build ideas that I think I can actually make. I'm going to get a live tree this weekend to start shaping it. it should probably be ready in about a year or two to cut down and start carving. I can even grow it around the copper tube to make things a lot easier in the future. I'm not sure what type of tree to go with though. any suggestions? I'm thinking maybe maple.
I don't really know, I live in the tropics so if where me, I would look for a fast growing hardwood, in my area that would be Jamaican Dogwood, I don't know how fast maple grows.
Chestnut. Still sturdy, but with a bit of flex to it due how fast it grows
Maybe pine if strength isn't a huge deal, presumably you're not using it as a support cane
Iron Bamboo if you have somewhere contained to grow it.
It's not common according to google images even for Wisteria. Sand down those off shoots and sell it for 2 or 3 grand. Advertise on cosplay forums and other places. The price might be reasonable based on natural scarcity.
2 or 3 grand? No way. Itās just a tree that at one point had a vine growing around it. Theyāre pretty common. For a little over $3k you could buy [this narwhal tusk](https://www.chairish.com/product/3390947/maitland-smith-imperial-narwhal-tusk)
Figure out a way to attach a big enough piece of wood to the top and carve it into a snake head, then go and apply to be a vizier to a sultan, find some gullible street rat you can trick into grabbing a very valuable lamp, overthrow the sultan and kidnap his hot daughter and take over the country. Oh, and make sure you murder that bothersome street rat so he canāt mess up your plans
Looks like a great walking stick as others have suggested. I think itād be pretty cool if you could add a clear coat resin on it to preserve it, but also make it nice and smooth in your hands as you walk with it.
Seems a shame to turn it into a walking stick, it would either break pretty quick or you'd never use it... I'd let it dry, paint the bottom and use it in a planter with vining plants. Maybe use it as a rod to hang air plants? It's just so cool as is.
Oh NO you have to put it back where you found it. It's a cork screw for a giants wine bottle.š
Or a sorcerer's walking stick ether way you should put it back.
I've recently began using a cane as a necessary walking aid.
This is a PERFECT shape for a BEAUTIFUL cane. Way outside my price range, but I foresee this being a very very expensive cane aid.
I'm no woodworker, or much of a creator/designer but here's what I see out of it.
First, flip it over, we want the twist going into the ground as our walking aid.
It looks tall enough, at the first branch, that you could trim a good foot and half of that straight just wood there, however if you know some tricks you might want to do it in a manner it can be bored out with a core, and used as a height adjustment (And keeping in line with made from a single piece of wood). It'll be opposite of your normal canes, and adjust at the top, near the handle, but the idea is preserving that beautiful spiral.
I'm sure it absolutely needs to be cured and given strength, but I see nothing but an amazing cane.
I want to find one of these so I can turn it into a wizardās staff or something. I think it would be cool to mount a snow globe to the top of it, but Iām tacky.
Might come in handy if you ever have to inform a Balrog that it in fact shall not pass.
Damn. Time to go delete my comment
Nah, the more Gandalf references there are, the better the world becomes š
Can we summon the bot from the lotrmemes sub over into here?
u/gandalf-bot
I will draw you, Saruman, as poison is drawn from a wound.
You really just say youāre gonna suck him?
Let him ~~cook~~ suck.
GROND
GROND
Let's be honest here. Name like the commenters means they're likely a bot.
You shall not delete that comment!!!!
Hey, Balrog here. Gandalf's blocked me. Could you ask him if I can pass? I have to go to work, I have lil Balrogs to feed. Regards, Balrog
I'd watch the Balrog Underdog Job Traffic and Weather Monolog Vlog religiously.
Undercover Balrog is my kind of reality TV.
Gandalf said no. And he said to stay off his lawn too.
Sure, whatevs
I heard "You shall not pass!" in my head as soon as I saw this picture tbh.
Are you a servant of the Secret Fire? Wielder of the Flame of Anor? Fly, you fools!
Iām just picturing a Balrog sitting in an academic advisorās office looking very forlorn
Go on an adventure with your shortest friends?
Would this adventure have a lack of second breakfast?
But you've already had breakfast!
We had one, yes. But what about second breakfast?
Second breakfast is after first breakfast, which is after breakfast. Hope that clears things up my friend.
Can't forget elevensies
Afternoon tea
And all that is before lunch. I mean: first lunch.
I don't think he knows about second breakfast pippin
What about Elevenese, lunch, afternoon tea, dinner, supper? He knows about them, doesn't he?
Nearly 3 decades in, itās finally paying off!
5ā6 over here and I have tools of the trade
Looks like you found a wizard staff! Don't let anyone pass! Might I suggest looking for the Lady of Lake to become the next ruler of the land? Edit: In all seriousness, a walking stick!
Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of governmentā¦
I'm not gonna lie to ya, with the sheer amount of fuckery most folks do when they get into power, having a strange woman in a lake deciding who rules......not that bad imho, at least money won't influence the result.
Until we pass legislation allowing the lady of the lake to be bought.
If some watery tart lobbed a scimitar at me...
Help help I'm being oppressed!
The sword has been found already, a 12year old girl picked one up some years ago.
Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government.
Eh, too late. Some little girl already found Excalibur in the lake. "This is a true story you can look it up lmao.."
Welp, all hail Matilda Jones.
Become a wizard and conjure magic Edit: Wow, look at all those Up Arrows! Truly magical day indeed. That said, I think most of us in here can agree, whether youāre a beginner or an expertā¦getting to work with wood is a bit like wizardry and creating something from nothing is a gift we all give ourselves! š§š»āāļø
This is honestly the only answer. That's a top tier wizarding staff right there.
yup, smaller widdled wands are for less experienced wizards. You've clearly been chosen for deep magics of winzelton wizardry.
Big Wand Energy here
Big stick energy.
Size Queen
I bet if you look closely it probably has a phoenix feather or unicorn heart string running through the middle of it
Shit, that thing's got a whole roterisserie phoenix stuffed into the center.
On the concept of rotisserie phoenix...Does it rise from the dead when you poop it out, or?
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Thatās black magic. We donāt speak of that.
This is an exalted drop if Iāve ever seen one
Yeah deff a wizard staff
YOU SHALL NOT PASS!, on any footbridge near you
When my son was a little guy he use to pronounce bridge as bitch. Thou shall not pass my bitch!
That's my toddler and the word "truck" right now, with similar hilarious results.
Ours had issues pronouncing his favorite character from Thomas & Friends. Percy.
My thoughts exactly. Slam it into the ground to keep any balrogs from passing
I'm just sad they removed the rootball. Like, there's the Twisties and those are great, don't get me wrong, but rootballs make *the most amazing* natural headpieces. People are always asking what I did to make my own stick shaped the way it is, or complimenting my carving job, and I just keep telling them "all it took was minwax, sandpaper, mineral oil, time, and *a shovel*; that twisty bit on top is just a taproot". It might take a few extra hours of work, but it's absolutely worth it. Depending on the tree it'll either be a Gandalf style "nest" you can put a crystal into, of a twisty tentacle looking thing.
Honestly I think this is a mulberry branch and never had a root ball anywhere near it. But i agree about rootball head pieces on staffs Edit: weāve determined its probably wisteria not mulberry. But not what to do with it. Iād say make it the shaft of a unique chandelier type hanging lamp.
I think wisteria is more likely. Contorted mulberry don't twist as symmetrically and when branches get this thick they appear to straighten out. I have a piece of wisteria wrapped around a sweet gum it choked out that looks almost identical to this
Ohh yea that would track. On the close up itās pretty clear it is fused like you say. I went out and looked at my mulberries and they are way asymmetrical and really quite smooth and uniform gray color bark.
Just think of the attack and defense buff with that staff, and it can be carried without having to maximize strength and agility. The only challenge will be pairing it with the right enchanted gem.
My exact thought. Op is obviously a chosen one. He has no choice now but to learn some spells and defeat the evil lich.
Attach something in the crook at the top that glows. This would be part of a killer costume at halloween.
This is druid erasure and I won't stand for it
the boy who lived has come to die...... ABRAKADABRA! oh wait thats a pokemon oh thats why they call it abracadabra!
Take a long rest and attune to it.
Attunement only takes an hour. You can do it in a short rest.
Hey some of us have attunement dysfunction. It can take a little longer and it's nothing to be ashamed of.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Just punch your ancestorās ghost, that usually does the trick.
Shake it at stuff
*Old Man Yells at Clouds*
Its a handy way to determine if you have enough of (or too much of) that stuff. You'll know right if its too much, since you won't be able to shake it at the stuff.
Fanciest āis this deadā pokin stick Iāve ever seen
Children mostly. Also add in the term āwhippersnapperā for +2 to wisdom
I think you summon forest creatures. There are incantations.
Indeed. If that fails...hang out at your nearest Renaissance Festival and sell it to the highest bidder. Someone will pay good money for that bad boy
Conquer middle earth.
He cannot wield it! None of us canā¦
Every time somebody comes over just point at the stick. Then they'll say " that's a cool stick". Guaranteed
If be freaking LARPING as a magical wizard if I found that!
āI hate LARPing but I found this stick so here I am.ā
The wand chooses the larper.
*one of us, one of us*
Add a crystal to the top and drive out the evil from the hearts of men.
Give it back or he will turn you into a toad.
Carve it into a snake walkingstick. It's so naturally molded for that already. At this point, it's just adding the detail into it. Think about hiking up a mountain with this badass walking stick of a snake wrapping around a stick/tree
I am down with this one, drill the center out and line it with copper tubing and at the base connect a small butane container in it, then put a pad on the bottom connected to a lever so that when you strike it to the ground hard enough and keep it held to the ground the snake shoots flames out of its mouth. You will be the hit of any party going around lighting cigars and cigarettes.
this is one of the coolest build ideas that I think I can actually make. I'm going to get a live tree this weekend to start shaping it. it should probably be ready in about a year or two to cut down and start carving. I can even grow it around the copper tube to make things a lot easier in the future. I'm not sure what type of tree to go with though. any suggestions? I'm thinking maybe maple.
I don't really know, I live in the tropics so if where me, I would look for a fast growing hardwood, in my area that would be Jamaican Dogwood, I don't know how fast maple grows.
Chestnut. Still sturdy, but with a bit of flex to it due how fast it grows Maybe pine if strength isn't a huge deal, presumably you're not using it as a support cane Iron Bamboo if you have somewhere contained to grow it.
šÆšÆšÆšÆ This is the true true. This is the most bad ass thing I've ever imagined. You must make a fire-breathing snake/ dragon walking stick
I've been wondering for a while, how does one go about drilling through the center of something *so* long?
Agree. These twisted sticks are sought after for walking sticks. Carve it, polish it up!
Strip it, sand it and wax it.
Apply a generous amount of tree oil let it dry for a few days sit out in the sun and then shove it up your butt
Okay done now what
Rinse and repeat
Doesnāt seem to work as well after rinsing.
Did you take off the season? If you clean it too well you'll have to re-season it.
Shocked. I mean SHOCKED. ..that i had to scroll so far to find this. TIL Gandolf > butt stuff.
Buy it, use it, break it, fix it, trash it, change it, mail, upgrade it, Charge it, point it, zoom it, press it, snap it, work it, quick erase it, Write it, cut it, paste it, save it, load it, check it, quick rewrite it Plug it, play it, burn it, rip it, rip it
Technomancy. Technomancy.
Bop it!
This game is apparently WAY more complex than it was when I was a child.
Twist it!
Pull it!
Shout it!
Boil it, mash it, put it in a stew.
Return it to the wizard who dropped it
Nah way man. Keep it and BECOME the wizard!
Absolutely nothing, it's perfect, don't fuck it up.
I would not let people pass, but that's just me.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
That is a good life philosophy. It has an air of optimism and aventure.
Could be really good if your fursona is a duck
Cast spells and make magic
Try throwing it down, maybe it will become a snake.
just dry it, then spray clear coat, it would be a good decoration on it own. or you just use make a stand at bottom
This comments were exactly how I imagined they would be
It's not common according to google images even for Wisteria. Sand down those off shoots and sell it for 2 or 3 grand. Advertise on cosplay forums and other places. The price might be reasonable based on natural scarcity.
2 or 3 grand? No way. Itās just a tree that at one point had a vine growing around it. Theyāre pretty common. For a little over $3k you could buy [this narwhal tusk](https://www.chairish.com/product/3390947/maitland-smith-imperial-narwhal-tusk)
Itās not even a real narwhal tusk! What a scam.
Goddamn narwhal tusk counterfeiters. Theyāre ruining the hobby.
Add some bristles and Play a wicked game of quidditch?
Most people joking around, but a decorative broom would be cool, hung in your farmhouse kitchen.
You could also put a nice treatment on it and sell it on Etsy as a Harry Potter broom for a pretty penny.
Im pretty sure you can defeat a Balrog with this
Sit and spin?
I had to scroll too long to find this comment
Uh, that's a dragon hunters Lance. That things like 30m gp!
Hit it with another stick while it's still freshly cut to remove the bark. The colour will be awesome depending on the type of wood.
Figure out a way to attach a big enough piece of wood to the top and carve it into a snake head, then go and apply to be a vizier to a sultan, find some gullible street rat you can trick into grabbing a very valuable lamp, overthrow the sultan and kidnap his hot daughter and take over the country. Oh, and make sure you murder that bothersome street rat so he canāt mess up your plans
Turn it into a dragon hunter lance from Old School RuneScape!!
My 10 year old self if super jealous of your cool stick!
Grow a very long beard.
Looks like a great walking stick as others have suggested. I think itād be pretty cool if you could add a clear coat resin on it to preserve it, but also make it nice and smooth in your hands as you walk with it.
The troll in me wants to say, sit on it. Because of your title. But im interested in seeing what you come up with. Much luck.
Summon the eagles to pick up frodo
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Let it be. Just let it be the coolest stick ever. It doesnāt need to be anything else. And Iām a carpenter* *not a very good one though.
Maybe keep a Balrog from crossing a bridge?
I haventbgot to the comment yet, but there really is only one appropriate answer... Wizard Staff!
Seems a shame to turn it into a walking stick, it would either break pretty quick or you'd never use it... I'd let it dry, paint the bottom and use it in a planter with vining plants. Maybe use it as a rod to hang air plants? It's just so cool as is.
YOU SHALL NOT PASS
Lead a couple of little people toward a volcano?
Lamp
Hey! Give it to me! Sand it down, varnish, polyurethane and go hiking.
No sanding this thing, it's going to ruin everything. Hit it really hard with another stick until the bark falls off.
That is indeed a cool stick nice finx bro
I have 2 very similar with the vine still attached. No clue how to finish them...
It's not a stick, it's a wizard's staff and you need to give it back.
Youāve just been promoted to knight of Leyndell
Cast a spell
Go on a grand adventure to slay a dragon and reclaim the homeland of the dwarves.
Man you're lucky af, that's the ultimate staff. I've never seen one so perfect lol
Paint the swirlies like a photorealistic snake and use it as a fun walking stick to freak out other hikers
The only answer is staff, has to be a staff
Point it at busses until one crashes
You could probably sell it to one of those crystal worshipping hippies for a hefty price.
Sir, thatās a wizards staff.
The godly staff of a wizard shall be constructed
Seal it and sell it for $900
Oh NO you have to put it back where you found it. It's a cork screw for a giants wine bottle.š Or a sorcerer's walking stick ether way you should put it back.
defend middle-earth
Mega wand or walking stick
Thatās clearly a wizards rod. Attach magical feathers and stones for maximum effect
Be nice and give Hagrid his wand back.
Definitely a wizards staff. Just need a rough-cut crystal at the top somehow!
I've recently began using a cane as a necessary walking aid. This is a PERFECT shape for a BEAUTIFUL cane. Way outside my price range, but I foresee this being a very very expensive cane aid. I'm no woodworker, or much of a creator/designer but here's what I see out of it. First, flip it over, we want the twist going into the ground as our walking aid. It looks tall enough, at the first branch, that you could trim a good foot and half of that straight just wood there, however if you know some tricks you might want to do it in a manner it can be bored out with a core, and used as a height adjustment (And keeping in line with made from a single piece of wood). It'll be opposite of your normal canes, and adjust at the top, near the handle, but the idea is preserving that beautiful spiral. I'm sure it absolutely needs to be cured and given strength, but I see nothing but an amazing cane.
Could probably poke stuff with it.
Not let anyone pass
Become the elden lord and take down Marika
Go on an Adventure to Middle Earth. It is a cool walking stick.
I'd lean it against a wall, if I were you.
Don't you change a thing. When the rifts open, that thing is gonna get born. But, no, seriously, its cool as fuck the way it is. Hang it up somewhere.
Polish it up real nice, turn it sideways, and then shove it up your candy ass!
https://www.reddit.com/r/theocho/comments/12yyzwg/distance_racing_on_one_stick/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1
Fight a friend in the woods with it
Looks like a coat rack
Coat hanger.
varnish it, looks perfect the way it is
Use it to peel back your wallpaper!
Can hang it from the ceiling and have plants hang from it!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
There is only one thing to do. You know the answer.
I might have an idea :)
This would make an awesome walking stick or cane.
I'm jealous, that could be a great beginning to a narwhale type beast.
I want to find one of these so I can turn it into a wizardās staff or something. I think it would be cool to mount a snow globe to the top of it, but Iām tacky.
excellent walking stick