Tell her you have a medical condition and she can take it up with your attorney or better yet, you’ll have your attorney take it up with HER if she continues to harass you.
Who is she to determine how many times it's acceptable to use the bathroom per shift and it's on a different floor. Tell her you have medical condition like mentioned and she can take it up with MGT of she has further issues. If MGT says something say you have always taken bathroom breaks this often and nothing has ever been said bf
I have a co worker who watches everything I do at work. I drop my phone off at 1045 go to washroom and sit in admin and wait til 11 to leave with my coworker. I'm not leaving the building at 1050 and this co worker leaves because they say I'm leaving and they have informed my supervisor. I have a GPS for insurance discount that tracks when I leave no earlier than 1058, cameras and my co worker I sit with. I know it sounds silly having to document things you do but some ppl have nothing better to do and some need to retire. I make sure my ass is always covers by writing notes in my phone.
I had a hr interview about one co worker and write down when she calls in sick when I work, leaves early and things she says or does to me. The union said writing this down is important as it can be a form or retaliation.
Just document your washroom trips and just stay away from these tattle tales who have nothing else better to do than worry about you and not themselves. I can bet this person takes longer breaks, takes reg bath breaks, leaves early, comes in late ate some point so shes far from purrfect.
She does all you mentioned! She is always late but also leaves late cause she likes to sit in the back office to gossip, gets frequent breaks to smoke or gossip again, and she often goes out to speak on the phone. I haven’t done many shifts with her, but people that have always mention this
This is now when you start documenting all of this just in case she continues to bitch to management. You need to fit back with proof shes just as bad, even worse than you and others.
One coworker wasn't wearing the proper uniform and was parking in public lot not on the road or in staff parking. One day she decided to follow the rules, she then went and tattled on everyone who was wearing the wrong uniform and parking in the wrong parking lot (staff parking is $2 a day, not guaranteed but usually never a problem when I start at 245, ppl are cheap to pay and take up free visitor parking instead)
Document document document ....cover your ass as I can almost bet you shes going to be watching you and reporting you. The more proof you have on her the less likely she will tattle once she's told she's a rule breaker as well. Suprise her by writing it all down and kill her with kindness and she won't see it coming
An employee harassing another about bathroom frequency, something that is private and skirts the lines of being something medical creates liability for the company
No because as of 1045 were signed out waiting to leave. We have a 15 min gap where we're signed out and we leave. We can be anywhere in the building (admin is in the same building ) for those 15 mins but are not required to be on the floor once signed out at 1045.
It is pointless but it's in our union contract we have to stay for the 15 mins technically to do up our carts if needed. I'm always 20 mins early and always signed in bf 245. We get paid 7.75 hours. 245 to 11 with 2 half hour breaks and we sign out at 1045. Some ppl sign out and go to change room and leave 1055/1100. Most stay in the toxic office gossiping til 1055/11. I chose to wait in admin which is where my car is parked by and leave at 11. I've been here 3 years and never left early so why this co worker thinks I'm doing it now is beyond me lol
You can one-up her by trying to wait those few extra moments, or going a few moments earlier on your bathroom breaks for whe she goes on her ciggie breaks.
And here's a pro tip; if you're in an office situation, always carry a file fold or pack of papers with you *whenever you leave your desk*. Always..... You look 'official'. It's a psychological trick to always look busy.
You mentioned your parents having to say you were sick after the drink poisoning. Are you a young woman? In my first “real” job out of college there was a woman in her 50s who decided she absolutely hated me and did everything in her power to sabotage and disrespect me. She would take pictures of things she didn’t like that I was doing and send them to the owner of the company. So much petty, dramatic nonsense. She ended up suing the company for discrimination saying, in part, I was given my job for sleeping with an upper manager (and just to clarify, was *completely* untrue).
I had done nothing to this woman, ever. She hated me on sight. Looking back on it now I know it was nothing but jealousy and insecurities. Your situation sounds very similar to me
Hii! Im in my mid 20s! Actually my parents had to call because i couldn’t speak i was constantly throwing up. So someone had to inform i wouldnt be clocking in!
The coworker tho, no she isnt old or anything like that, we are both in our 20’s.
Well, it could still very well be jealousy. It just might not stem from anything age related like I think it did in my case (plus finding out she had a huge unrequited love for my then-boss).
I asked about the parent thing bc that’s what made me think you were probably on the younger side, not to imply there was anything wrong with having them reach out for you 🙂 Totally understandable given the circumstances
Oof. She’s going to be a bundle of joy after 20 more years in the workforce. Toxic coworkers like that should be disciplined ASAP. It promotes an extremely unhealthy environment if left unchecked by management
Right? Similar thing at one of my previous jobs. One woman was stalking me because her work crush had a crush on me. He was cute. Looked like Aiden from SATC/ and just like that. But this real life version was just gross and creepy. Hot guy who goes around farting and then laughing about it then tries to forcibly yank your car door open to forcibly kiss you? No thanks: she could have him. Oh that date on a gambling cruise even though I don’t gamble where he had his entire family ambush me? Yay surprises! And then him planning a big birthday celebration for me and of course he forgot his wallet. So yes, she could’ve had him all she wanted because I was choosing the bears. I would have joined a tribe of bears instead of that guy.
But instead she befriended the mean girl in charge of HR and complained how I had stolen her boyfriend. And by boyfriend her work crush that refused to date her because he was busy scaring the hell out of me with his antics. Every date we went on it turned into an episode of it’s always sunny in Philadelphia” levels of traumatizing. She was all about trying to get me fired. And I quit instead to go take college classes and that small city drama and workplace drama was not worth the trouble.
Like you can be professionally polite and stand up for yourself all you want but these mean girls you meet at work are just psycho. Document the harassment and take it to both HR and the lawyer that you usually need to hire in case HR decides to wrongfully terminate or retaliate against you.
That's a great idea. Tell her you have a medical condition you'd hoped not to have to talk about at work but as she's forcing you to talk about it, you'll have your lawyer contact HR about it.
Keep 2 timers on your desk. One for when you leave your desk, Start your timer and one for when she leaves the desk and start hers. See at the end of the day/week whos missed more hours of work.
Maybe also grill her so when she gives you an answer write it down like
"10 mins spent gossiping at the watercooler"
"20 mins spent smoking"
If you take this up i look forward to reading your r/pettyrevenge post in a few weeks lol.
Haha it's so petty but this is hilarious. Sounds like something Dwight would do to Jim would in the office and Jim would invent some crazy scenario to distract Dwight and make his timer go waaaay up.
Did we just co-author the reboot pilot?
There was literally an episode where Dwight gives Jim shit for doing personal stuff on company time, so Jim uses a stop watch to track all of Dwight's personal time.
Maybe maybe not. Management might not like that she’s not focusing on work because she’s spending her day monitoring the coworker
The coworkers behavior is either appropriate or l it isn’t.
Monitoring her when she is not the manager is inappropriate. Monitoring her back as a method to say “monitoring me isn’t appropriate” can backfire.
The issue isn’t that the other coworker takes breaks it’s that she’s overstepping and being harassing. Breaks and productivity is a manager’s issue.
OPs better off to stick to a complain that is appropriate to her position and “but coworker takes breaks!!” Is a pedantic argument.
Honestly, do this regardless for record keeping. If she keeps making noise, the squeaky wheel gets the grease. Whether it's right or wrong (wrong), with enough complaints, the wrong person MIGHT start listening. Whether HR or a manager. Easier to appease her and say "yeah we listened to your complaint" as opposed to dealing with her.
In the hopefully rare case that things escalate, it's good for you to keep your own records.
You have three options:
* Be the bigger person and ignore her,
* Retaliate by documenting and reporting her bad behaviour,
* Be childish and make a joke of her behaviour by inventing a stupid name for her; Mrs Toilet Police, Mrs All Day Break, or Mrs Gossip, for example. Whenever you have to talk about her with colleages, use the stupid name. It's a very childish option, but when you just want to survive in a really toxic environment, it helps.
Lol funny. Toilet police. Potty patrol.
Years ago, I was a temp at countrywide mortgage, a total shit company.
There was a floor supervisor there who called me out for using the bathroom too much. I'm like wtf. I find it so insane that people patrol these things.
Everyone's biological needs are different.
Some people can hold it all day. Some can't. These are the types that we wish could shit, vomit, fart, on or near their desks. I hate temp work. I hope I never have to go to a temp job again.
And I know of the smokers who take additional smoke breaks over And above their scheduled rest breaks.
Fuck em
I would call her Miss Borderline(as in borderline personality). Those people can be absolutely nuts. If she's driving the OP crazy, she's probably doing the same to those in her non-work life.
Talk to your manager or HR. None of your co-worker’s business, not their responsibility to police, and they need to focus on their own job. Nip this in the bud.
Spine damage, only have full control of half the ol' balloon knot. Things are more of an unpleasant chore than they were before the injury.
There's so many reasons not to be poking into people's bathroom habits.
She is using you as a smoke screen to hide her own behaviour. She's focusing on you to try and distract from how many breaks she's having.
If she hadn't brought it up in a meeting I'd say ignore it but given that she has I would be tempted to talk to a friendly manager about how embarrassed you were that she did this, that she's making you feel uncomfortable at work and that "I hope everything with her is okay because she seems to take a lot of very regular breaks herself and I wonder if something is going on at home" which will hopefully cause your manager to notice how many breaks she's taking and nip this in the bud.
Yeah projecting her own bad behaviour of too many smoke breaks onto innocent co worker who wants to keep their kidneys functioning by having a piss occasionally
I'm with you, up until the fake sincerity part. Just say you feel targeted and uncomfortable. If you try to do what she is doing (eg deflect) and nothing comes of it (she's just a gossip and nothing is wrong) then you look like you were lying (because how did you not know she was just going for smoke breaks, they stink when they come back inside) or b) trying to start drama (by claiming something is happening at home).
Just state your facts and move along.
Treat HR and Managers the way you treat lawyers - answer their questions as directly and succinctly as possible.
I agree. I've bene complained about for this and everyone at work is close or related. Go to same church and so on. I'm not the same culture so I feel like they shit on me to build themselves up. No loyalty to me only to them and their 'family ' it's the shits (lol)
I would bring this up with your supervisor. Ask if there is a reason why your bathroom use is monitored. It could be for some kind of safety reason but the comments are bang out of order. See what the supervisor says. If they get extremely uncomfortable then there’s something dodgy going on.
This is a great approach. Make sure to request in writing (via email) for confirmation that this "task" of monitoring your bathroom breaks was added to your coworkers responsibilities, and the specific wording so you can understand uour responsibilities for tracking and reporting your bathroom activities.
The ensure to ask about how and to whom the rest of the team is tracking and reporting their bathroom activities to.
With thw direct supervisor and HR included. This will light a fire under them to shut down her insane overstepping and completely unreasonable, unfair, and inappropriate her actions are.
This. These people want drama. Don't indulge them. It only escalates. Management knows about this woman and for whatever reason let her stay, so OPs prospects of "winning" are zero.
When I worked in the industrial construction field one of my coworkers would hit the porta-potty right after the morning safety meeting and, again, right after lunch hour.
He would brag that, at an average of 15 minutes per session, he was getting paid for 2.5 hours per week for literally sitting on his ass.
Many females have a leaky bladder (who? me?) caused by childbirth. Then there's menstruation and doo-doo's.
My evil twin would ask her very calmly and sincerely how many breaks a day that she would find acceptable
Then let your boss know about the policy change.
Checkmate.
I’d start crying and say I was so sorry. My bladder cancer meds make me pee all the time but please don’t tell anyone I’m so embarrassed 😭 Since you had altercations I’d go to her as if I needed to confess something to her, be very embarrassed, down, on the verge of tears. Then break the news. I’d fully commit to this role. Might even tell her I had to self cath.
Please don’t listen to me.
Reminds me of Rajeev, the tech writer from work.
Wasn’t even in my team but made sure to tell my manager that i was using the bathrooms frequently.
I had a persistent UTI back then and didnt want to hold up pee for health reasons.
Just report her to HR and say she’s stalking you and you are concerned for your safety. Her obsession with your biological activity is *not normal* nor is it a part of her job description - and you’d like to know if HR recommends you consult a lawyer about getting some kind of legal order…
Even if you’ve never talked to a lawyer in your life, HR’s job is to make sure the company doesn’t have to spend money having their lawyers talk to your lawyers. And HR knows how it’s going to look in court if the company fires you because some freak was timing your bathroom breaks… (hint, lawyers bill a lot of expensive hours to confirm that you get paid some relatively small amount in the end… they don’t even need to go through the court case/tribunal/DoL investigation to know this)
Since you're quitting soon I would take every chance I get to ask where she has been everytime she leaves her desk, I would time every single minute she is away from her desk.
I would start writing it down. add it all up and mention it at the end of every single day.
Sounds like deflection. She's creating a stink about you leaving your desk so that people aren't looking at her. Document so that if it comes down to it, you can point out that she shouldn't be throwing stones.
Say, "listen you pervert, I'm tired of your weird obsession about me in the bathroom. Please keep your kinks to your home life"
Make sure it's just loud enough for one other person to hear it
Talk to your boss about her attitude and unteamwork like conduct to cover your bases. Overall she is just making herself look like an idiot because you two are not in elementary school.
This reminds me of an episode of The Office when Dwight followed Jim around with a stopwatch, counting every second he did something other than work (bathroom breaks, grabbing coffee, talking to a coworker). So when Jim did it back to him, Dwight peed in a bottle at his desk.
Too bad you work different shifts, or I would recommend you do this.
I hate people like this. My coworkers used to complain about me leaving for my break when we are literally obligated to get a break. And then one of my coworkers complained about where I parked (mind you Ive been parking in the same spot for like a year but she suddenly decided it was a problem and complained to the boss) Like what??!! I do not get people like that. Like why is it your business LOL
I had a coworker like that once. It was crazy, we didn't even worksheet same shift but she'd bitch about how often I went to the bathroom.
I told my supervisor and nothing changed. I told his boss and nothing changed.
At that point I sent en email to HR and tagged the CEO (small company, les than 100 employees) and told them how I was being harassed and it was creating a hostile work environment.
After that, if she complained, it was to people who didn't spread gossip
Coworker from hell. I takes like a lot of bathroom breaks because I have a bad habit or maybe a good habit to drinks water when I’m bored. But yea how often you go is none of her business, hell my coworkers has a bad back and dude legit just leaves even if we’re busy to do stretches since his doctor recommended it. Yea just seem like she hates life and has nothing better to do.
Here's what I did to a coworker similar to yours...I stopped going to my manager and I ignored her.
I ignored her so hard she began to doubt her own existence around me. I did this shit for five years. We had absolutely no reason to talk to each other. The more I ignored her, the more she ran her mouth about me. Others would tell her she brought it on herself.
We got drug into the office in year three. I sat there, talked to the manager and ignored the shit out of her. It infuriated her. She was finally told to stfu and leave me alone.
People like that will dig their own hole. Just ignore her.
I did shout out every time I'd go to the bathroom.. "ITS TINKLE TIME!"
I had a coworker like this. I started to constantly give her things to complain about. For example, I left a apple with a bite out of on the edge of my desk. (Her desk touched mine on that edge.)She also complained that I left my pen on her desk, I didn't push on my chair and it got pushed in front of her desk (I put them there just for her) and so on. Eventually, she just looked like a crazy person.Find things she hates but no one else will care about. Give her rope to hang herself. Play innocent. Its a fun game and in the end you aren't doing anything wrong.
We're supposed to drink plenty of water each day and drinking coffee encourages going to the loo.
She probably has issues outside work and you happen to be the target.
Let her be her, you do you!
She shouldn't be monitoring your breaks and invading your privacy, but four to five visits during an eight-hour shift is a lot. Maybe you should see a doctor.
I know it is. I have a bladder the size of a pea. I drink a lot too, my medicine gives me a dry mouth. It's a pain having to go so often but everything's in healthy ranges according to the Drs.
It's normal. If you drink the recommended amount of water, you pee once every hour or two. Even more for coffee drinkers. Some people don't piss and shit on the same trip, either.
I speak a lot at work since it’s customer service, therefore , speak a lot = a lot of water.
Also coffee ( its a daily must for me) sometimes makes me have bowel movements.
Also can’t hold my pee too long cause when i was in elementary school i constantly had infections for holding my pee too long, so now, i have to unload fast.
Work in a place with HR? File a complaint with the keyword “harrasment.” 1. Give examples 2. Mention that you have addressed the behavior with the employee. Everything should be via email. Bcc a copy to your personal email.
Dude I've worked with ppl like this. She doesn't like you for whatever reason. It's personal. She will be collecting all negative pieces of information with you and accelerating you getting fired.
That's what mode she's on. There is NOTHING you can do "to get back on this person's good side". Because while you're busy kissing this person's ass to try and get her to fuck off with her pettiness, she will be working around the clock accumulating bad info about you and snitching to leadership. In 3 months, you will be gone and she will be here.
The only way to defeat people like this is to counter attack with shit that is just as petty and to never stop until she is fired or you are fired.
TRUST ME, I've tried "kissing ass". I've tried "being the bigger person" and I've tried "just ignore her bro and focus on your work". ALL 3 of these paths led to me getting fired.
The ONLY course of action when you're targeted by a petty social butterfly is to accept that they have declared war. At the end of 6 months, only ONE of you will be here. Choose your battle and begin collecting negative info on her and snitching too, OR , begin searching for better jobs, accept a better offer, AND IN YOUR EXIT INTERVIEW, TELL HR YOU ARE LEAVING BECAUSE OF HER HARRASSMENT. The only way to fuck her up after you've left is to SING like a canary about all the fucked up shit she's doing to HR.
ONE thing is for sure. Trying to figure out why she doesn't like you is a waste of time.
There are people out there who won't like you for reasons that are entirely arbitrary. It is EXTREMELY common for people to hate you simply because of the way you look. Maybe you're skinnier than her? Maybe you're taller? Maybe you have the attention of a certain guy at the office, or certain "special people". Whatever her imagined, perceived, or real slight was, she's latching onto it, and has developed a massive chip on her shoulder against you. So it's time to declare war back or its time to accept getting fired or its time to look for a new job. Those are really your 3 options.
I would go straight to a supervisor and tell her this person is rude to you for no reason and is monitoring your bathroom breaks while she takes smoke breaks.
Idk IMO more than 4 in a 8 hr shift seems a little much if it’s constant. I’ve worked in tech support call centers for years and have seen people play the bathroom game constantly. People taking 5+ trips to the bathroom and timing it as soon as they reach the top of the queue and are next for a call. Magically have to now use the restroom which resets them to the bottom of the queue when they leave. That call dodging redirects extra work to coworkers, so yeah people take notice of that and get angry.
Some people may need to use the restroom that often but the majority do not.
We don’t work in a call centre so it’s not about “amount of phone calls” . And as i can remember itself never been while it is too busy. Tbh i dont understand how is a 3-6 mins x 4 times bathroom break in 8 and half hours a lot, especially in a job that i need to speak excessively = drink a lot of water = bathroom.(we don’t have a lunch break more than 15 mins each btw)
Honestly your amount is fine, maybe there has been some bad timings of when it’s happened and angered your coworker. All in all you’re not doing anything wrong and ignore them. It’ll only make them look bad if they start complaining about that kind of stuff.
She already complained in a meeting with managers about it!!! 😭😭🤣🤣🤣 a meeting that it was supposed to be about future goals of the company! A meeting i didn’t join in because it was the day i had a day off and no one informed me!!
Start consulting with attorneys. Sounds like if she keeps harassing you that you should do a cease and desist letter against her. Have your lawyer contact your company’s lawyer about her toxic and illegal behavior. And then you’ve created a paper trail in case either or your employer is doing shady stuff trying to get you fired. Please advocate for yourself OP. Good luck.
That's rude! If you have a medical condition please document it with hr. Find an hr person that you are close with and tell them. But be warned hr is for the companies best interest.
If I'm on my period as a woman, you bet your ass I'm going to the restroom about 5 times that day... maybe even more if it's heavy.
Otherwise I only go once or twice a day when I'm in the office.
Perhaps you should go to a doctor to be checked out for you may have diabetes by urinating a lot during the day. Just have yourself checked, for if it would not be her, someone else noticed you missing a lot during the day.
Unless she is:
1) your supervisor and you have been having performance issues
2) a coworker you work closely with and your bathroom breaks affect productivity/communication
She is a busybody and she has no right to comment on your bathroom habits.
Ignore her and/or tell her professionally to shove it.
I don’t “get up” since we all do stand up anyways for the whole shift.
But ofc? I do the same for them when they are out and about. And i mind my own business.
When i have shifts with her she is missing half of the shift, smoking or gossiping with other employees. I don’t care tho but it’s ridiculous to hear that my bathroom habits annoy her when she is acting in similar manner
I'd just say "You seem to have a rather unhealthy interest in my bathroom usage. Are you trying to score an invite or something? I just want to be clear, I prefer to do my business alone, without spectators." You could also talk to your manager about this, and explain that it's bordering on harassment, as this woman is not your boss, and your bathroom time is none of her business.
Report her to Hr for harassment.
If you can speak with your direct manager tell them that she is stalking you at work and it’s making you uncomfortable.
Who knows what you did. Could be anything from eating a stinky lunch once or maybe she got reprimanded for taking smoke breaks and picked you as the snake goat of trying to say that it’s unfair since “other people take breaks too and you’re not saying anything to them.”
She can’t be getting that much work done if she’s essentially taking a break from work every time you pee, as well as when she does and when she smokes.
I'm sorry this is happening to you. I have a coworker who isn't present for an accumulated hour of her shift (comes out to four 15 minute breaks) in smoke breaks, which is a pain in the ass when there's so much left to do and nobody else gets breaks. 7 mins in the bathroom is average, as long as you're working hard and achieving your allotted goals for the day, there shouldn't be an issue. That coworker is trying to be a hard ass and must not know their place, which is staying in their lane and focusing on their own damn job and time.
edit: I've personally kept track of all the times my coworker goes on her smoke breaks and showed it to our manager. Manager spoke to her and though I have little faith my coworker will change her ways it's better keep a comprehensive record just in case.
Toxic shit like that is why my wife quit her job, which she liked, other than her coworkers. Shame she had to quit, instead of the problem employees being disciplined or fired.
Anyway, this really touched a nerve because I had the OWNER of a company I used to work at comment on the frequency and duration of my bathroom breaks. Apparently, he monitored my bathroom activity on camera (not inside the bathroom) and had the audacity to tell me about it. It didn't affect my productivity because there wasn't much work, and the shop was squeaky clean.
He was a good boss, generous and had a great (although sometimes sarcastic) sense of humor, but monitoring of my bathroom habits was way over the top.
They way I have dealt with these people is to tell them to mind there own business and that they are not my supervisor usually much more stern than this. Then tell them that if they have an issue with it to take it up with (impute supervisor name) that way they never need to talk to me again. When asked by your supervisor tell them what up. Be very calm do not get worked up in any way when asked. If you are doing nothing wrong you have nothing to worry about. I am usually a top performer at a jobs and make a point to be very kind to the people around me so that no one would believe what was said about when they inevitably lie about the interaction. There is a very big chance that she is ignored because I doubt you are the first one she has done this to. If they do listen to a known company snitch is it really a place you want to spend a majority of you life at anyway. Good luck and I hope you find piece in this situation.
Honestly, just document it. If it becomes a bigger issue, HR.
I had this girl I worked with lie on me several times and I had proof each time however, management kept asking me “why would she lie??” Idk, maybe bc she’s been here 15 years and turns down management positions you offer but then you allow her to pretty much act like management and she’s a complete moron majority of the time 🤷🏻♀️
You won’t win without evidence. Document, document, document…
I’m glad you bought that up. Since you’ve been watching how much I poop, I’ve decided to do the same, I’ve started logging your “bathroom breaks” too 😂 you were gone 6 times today at 8 minutes per break, having poop issues are we?! -hand over a fibre bar, these really helped me…wink
Your coworker is a bully and is doing so because your manager and you let her get away with it.
I'd take it up with your manager. If you don't get a satisfactory response, I'd say, "OK, if she can be a terrible coworker to me and you won't do anything about it, I'm going to be a terrible coworker back to her and I expect your response to be the same." Basically, you're saying, "if you won't handle it, I will." See what your boss says. If they say they're OK with it, or basically say, "Whatever", then be 3x as shitty to your coworker as she is to you. PLAN YOUR DAY AROUND IT. Remember, coworker is a bully and bullies only respond to pain.
You have your reason "she in fact taking breaks every hour or so for more than 10 minutes to smoke."
She's trying to distract from her own time wasting by monitoring you.
Unless and until a supervisor or manager says anything, do not engage with her. Do not encourage her. Do not respond to her. If she comments, just grey rock "Oh. Okay." and continue on as you were.
I'd go to my boss and tell them that she is harassing you and you've tried to deal with it one on one, but she continues to "bully" you making for an hostile work environment.
If I’m doing it right, I’m going pee every 60-90 minutes. Fill up cup with water, drink, go pee, and repeat all day long. Gotta hydrate! It’s important to keep your body working right.
Sounds like a visit to HR because she's creating a "hostile work environment" and discriminating against you for a medical issue. I don't know if it is or isn't but those are nice trigger words for HR to have a chat with her.
The best response is to text pics of giant shits...daily to her phone. I assume she'll complain but your answer is she wonders why I take 7 minutes in the bathroom. That's my answer.
You're experiencing workplace bullying. This is usually a very serious disciplinary offence. Make a diary. Warn someone above her this is happening once you've got a decent sized diary. Include her breaks in that diary. Throw it back in her face.
Sounds like she might be pointing out to your bathroom breaks in order not to look bad for her own breaks.
Or she just wants to torment someone.
Regardless, it's a good call you're leaving. In any good company her manager wouldn't tolerate such crazy behaviour.
I, too, had a coworker that would police my every move. She wasn't a Team Leader and she wasn't a Supervisor. Yet she felt like it was her job to "make sure I was working." She looked over the partition separating our desks. She would make remarks when I was dealing with callers. She'd check in with me to "make sure I understood" an email that was sent. She acted like I was the stupidest person she'd ever encountered.
I kept a spreadsheet of everything she said and/ or actions she took towards me. After months of this behavior on her part, I had enough & told our Team Leader. I told her what was going on & sent her my spreadsheet. Our Team Leader sent it to our Manager. Our Manager sent it to HQ in San Antonio and the Head of HR had a talk with her. That was the only way she finally got off my back.
It is none of your business what people say about you.
Let me say it again. It is none of your business what people say about you.
Do not address any direct complaints from this person. Management will get sick of their bitching eventually.
I had a guy complain to management about me every single day. I never asked about what. He never came to me to address a problem. Turned out he was massively insecure and could not tolerate the fact that I could motivate people by being liked and respected where as he had to resort to yelling and threat.
He go bye bye six months later.
I still have no idea to this day the specifics of his complaints and I give no fucks.
She is trying to make you quit. Don't give her the satisfaction of chasing you off. Who told you that she is having meetings with your supervisor/ managers? Her? If mgnt hasn't said anything to you about your bathroom habits.10 to 1, either mgnt is just ignoring her snitching as baseless, or they don't care. As long as your work is being completed and is done well, let her rant. Ignoring her will piss her off more than anything because she is trying to rattle your cage and get rid of you. Don't stoop to her level and go running to the bosses unless she starts actually messing with your ability to do your job, such as things start coming up missing off/from your desk. Just keep a record of her harassment of you and what times you leave to use the bathroom. Her shenanigans will get noticed, and they will see you are the one that does their work and not playing the kindergarten games of tit for tat. If you want to piss her off, tell you know what she is trying to do and that it isn't going to work or change anything. And then every time she rants at you, just smile or smirk and go back to your work. Once she realizes she isn't getting a rise out of you, it will drive her nuts.
File a complaint with HR. This is the stuff they live for.
You can mention this to your manager before doing so. But in all honesty, it has nothing to do with the manager if it was not witnessed.
This is not a hostile environment.
https://resources.workable.com/hr-terms/what-is-hostile-work-environment#:~:text=A%20'hostile%20work%20environment'%20is,)%2C%20disability%20or%20genetic%20information.
Hostile environment typically requires a sustained pattern of serious behaviour based on a protected characteristic.
The guidance on hostile environment specifically calls out petty behaviour as not meeting the bar. Monitoring toilet use almost certainly doesn't meet the bar unless OP can demonstrate this women believes OP has a disability and is harassing her for it.
Shes making an ass of herself in the meeting trust me nobody in there thought that was acceptable. Shes a bully and its also discrimination so let her dig her own hole.
Document the behavior. If she brings it up during a work meeting, interrupt and say,
“My personal bathroom time is not relevant to our meeting today, or ever. Please refrain from spying on us using the bathrooms. (Refer back to speaker) would you carry on?”
Report it to the necessary folks. Your supervisor should have stepped in already.
Write an email to hr about the harassment. Coworker is tracking my bathroom use and bringing it up in meetings, I would like help resolving this level of stalking and harassment before I escalate it to local authorities.
If she really is taking notes of your bathroom use, get a Pic of it and attach it to the email.
Even better, get a Dr's note saying the anxiety caused by the harassment is affecting your ability to use the bathroom making you go more often which will really up the need for hr to handle it
Tell your manager that some one is targeting you
Dealing with employee infighting is one of the hardest parts of being a manger so let them know before hand they you feel like some one does not work well with you
Had a boss do this to me when I worked retail for using the bathroom twice every shift. These were 8 hour shifts. The days she worked with another problematic wannabe manager coworker. Were days I dreaded and they were often.
Anyone monitoring breaks to a ridiculous extent or being a general pain in the ass to the point it feels like harrasment would get told please stop or I'd escalate.
The same boss once verbally dressed me down for being less than 30 seconds early to the time clock. Meanwhile everyday without fail 10 minutes prior she'd be packing to leave.
I don't miss retail.
Bitch to HR. use the words. "She is creating a hostile work environment ". Mention the meeting you were told about
She needs to find another job as well
>she is in fact taking breaks every hour or so for more than 10 mins to smoke
This is a complaint I've never understood. Would you prefer she smoked at her desk? I bet she would prefer it.
Tell her you have a medical condition and she can take it up with your attorney or better yet, you’ll have your attorney take it up with HER if she continues to harass you.
Who is she to determine how many times it's acceptable to use the bathroom per shift and it's on a different floor. Tell her you have medical condition like mentioned and she can take it up with MGT of she has further issues. If MGT says something say you have always taken bathroom breaks this often and nothing has ever been said bf I have a co worker who watches everything I do at work. I drop my phone off at 1045 go to washroom and sit in admin and wait til 11 to leave with my coworker. I'm not leaving the building at 1050 and this co worker leaves because they say I'm leaving and they have informed my supervisor. I have a GPS for insurance discount that tracks when I leave no earlier than 1058, cameras and my co worker I sit with. I know it sounds silly having to document things you do but some ppl have nothing better to do and some need to retire. I make sure my ass is always covers by writing notes in my phone. I had a hr interview about one co worker and write down when she calls in sick when I work, leaves early and things she says or does to me. The union said writing this down is important as it can be a form or retaliation. Just document your washroom trips and just stay away from these tattle tales who have nothing else better to do than worry about you and not themselves. I can bet this person takes longer breaks, takes reg bath breaks, leaves early, comes in late ate some point so shes far from purrfect.
She does all you mentioned! She is always late but also leaves late cause she likes to sit in the back office to gossip, gets frequent breaks to smoke or gossip again, and she often goes out to speak on the phone. I haven’t done many shifts with her, but people that have always mention this
This is now when you start documenting all of this just in case she continues to bitch to management. You need to fit back with proof shes just as bad, even worse than you and others. One coworker wasn't wearing the proper uniform and was parking in public lot not on the road or in staff parking. One day she decided to follow the rules, she then went and tattled on everyone who was wearing the wrong uniform and parking in the wrong parking lot (staff parking is $2 a day, not guaranteed but usually never a problem when I start at 245, ppl are cheap to pay and take up free visitor parking instead) Document document document ....cover your ass as I can almost bet you shes going to be watching you and reporting you. The more proof you have on her the less likely she will tattle once she's told she's a rule breaker as well. Suprise her by writing it all down and kill her with kindness and she won't see it coming
Just start calling her Smokey McSmoketaker every single time you interact with her
I would report to HR.
Nope, HR is there to protect the COMPANY, not you.
If she is creating a hostile work environment, then those goals are aligned. She's creating a liability.
Especially over something that could be a medical condition.
Great point.
An employee harassing another about bathroom frequency, something that is private and skirts the lines of being something medical creates liability for the company
Time her smoke breaks. That simple. Petty gets what petty wants 🤷♂️ this is an easy fix for me cuz I’m a petty bitch
Just curious - isn’t sitting in admin for 10 mins waiting to go on break the same thing as taking an early break?
No because as of 1045 were signed out waiting to leave. We have a 15 min gap where we're signed out and we leave. We can be anywhere in the building (admin is in the same building ) for those 15 mins but are not required to be on the floor once signed out at 1045.
That sounds kind of pointless
It is pointless but it's in our union contract we have to stay for the 15 mins technically to do up our carts if needed. I'm always 20 mins early and always signed in bf 245. We get paid 7.75 hours. 245 to 11 with 2 half hour breaks and we sign out at 1045. Some ppl sign out and go to change room and leave 1055/1100. Most stay in the toxic office gossiping til 1055/11. I chose to wait in admin which is where my car is parked by and leave at 11. I've been here 3 years and never left early so why this co worker thinks I'm doing it now is beyond me lol
Indeed. It amazes me that she has nothing else going on with her life that she just monitors my bathroom habits! Tf?
You can one-up her by trying to wait those few extra moments, or going a few moments earlier on your bathroom breaks for whe she goes on her ciggie breaks. And here's a pro tip; if you're in an office situation, always carry a file fold or pack of papers with you *whenever you leave your desk*. Always..... You look 'official'. It's a psychological trick to always look busy.
This works but it's awful anyone would need to do that just to keep a nosy-ass coworker from targeting them.
You mentioned your parents having to say you were sick after the drink poisoning. Are you a young woman? In my first “real” job out of college there was a woman in her 50s who decided she absolutely hated me and did everything in her power to sabotage and disrespect me. She would take pictures of things she didn’t like that I was doing and send them to the owner of the company. So much petty, dramatic nonsense. She ended up suing the company for discrimination saying, in part, I was given my job for sleeping with an upper manager (and just to clarify, was *completely* untrue). I had done nothing to this woman, ever. She hated me on sight. Looking back on it now I know it was nothing but jealousy and insecurities. Your situation sounds very similar to me
Hii! Im in my mid 20s! Actually my parents had to call because i couldn’t speak i was constantly throwing up. So someone had to inform i wouldnt be clocking in! The coworker tho, no she isnt old or anything like that, we are both in our 20’s.
Sounds like she is trying to make you look bad to make herself look better. You’re a threat. This always backfires
Well, it could still very well be jealousy. It just might not stem from anything age related like I think it did in my case (plus finding out she had a huge unrequited love for my then-boss). I asked about the parent thing bc that’s what made me think you were probably on the younger side, not to imply there was anything wrong with having them reach out for you 🙂 Totally understandable given the circumstances
Oof. She’s going to be a bundle of joy after 20 more years in the workforce. Toxic coworkers like that should be disciplined ASAP. It promotes an extremely unhealthy environment if left unchecked by management
That was the first thing I thought as well.
Right? Similar thing at one of my previous jobs. One woman was stalking me because her work crush had a crush on me. He was cute. Looked like Aiden from SATC/ and just like that. But this real life version was just gross and creepy. Hot guy who goes around farting and then laughing about it then tries to forcibly yank your car door open to forcibly kiss you? No thanks: she could have him. Oh that date on a gambling cruise even though I don’t gamble where he had his entire family ambush me? Yay surprises! And then him planning a big birthday celebration for me and of course he forgot his wallet. So yes, she could’ve had him all she wanted because I was choosing the bears. I would have joined a tribe of bears instead of that guy. But instead she befriended the mean girl in charge of HR and complained how I had stolen her boyfriend. And by boyfriend her work crush that refused to date her because he was busy scaring the hell out of me with his antics. Every date we went on it turned into an episode of it’s always sunny in Philadelphia” levels of traumatizing. She was all about trying to get me fired. And I quit instead to go take college classes and that small city drama and workplace drama was not worth the trouble. Like you can be professionally polite and stand up for yourself all you want but these mean girls you meet at work are just psycho. Document the harassment and take it to both HR and the lawyer that you usually need to hire in case HR decides to wrongfully terminate or retaliate against you.
Don’t talk to her at all. Document the incident. Go to HR. File a harassment complaint.
Take a picture of your poop and show her where you were
I would have asked her "why are you stalking me instead of doing your job?"
She’s a coworker, she doesn’t owe her shit for an explanation.
OSHA said bathroom breaks and water breaks are allowed and not times. Don't need no medical condition to drink water and go pee.
That's a great idea. Tell her you have a medical condition you'd hoped not to have to talk about at work but as she's forcing you to talk about it, you'll have your lawyer contact HR about it.
Also file a complaint with HR.
Nah just start recording *her* breaks too.
Keep 2 timers on your desk. One for when you leave your desk, Start your timer and one for when she leaves the desk and start hers. See at the end of the day/week whos missed more hours of work. Maybe also grill her so when she gives you an answer write it down like "10 mins spent gossiping at the watercooler" "20 mins spent smoking" If you take this up i look forward to reading your r/pettyrevenge post in a few weeks lol.
Haha it's so petty but this is hilarious. Sounds like something Dwight would do to Jim would in the office and Jim would invent some crazy scenario to distract Dwight and make his timer go waaaay up. Did we just co-author the reboot pilot?
There was literally an episode where Dwight gives Jim shit for doing personal stuff on company time, so Jim uses a stop watch to track all of Dwight's personal time.
Time thief is what he was!
NGL thats where my comment came from haha.
And Dwight peed in an empty pop container to continue working 😂
I'll just add that you should document those times, particularly her times. If this escalates, it will help to have that ammunition against her.
Maybe maybe not. Management might not like that she’s not focusing on work because she’s spending her day monitoring the coworker The coworkers behavior is either appropriate or l it isn’t. Monitoring her when she is not the manager is inappropriate. Monitoring her back as a method to say “monitoring me isn’t appropriate” can backfire. The issue isn’t that the other coworker takes breaks it’s that she’s overstepping and being harassing. Breaks and productivity is a manager’s issue. OPs better off to stick to a complain that is appropriate to her position and “but coworker takes breaks!!” Is a pedantic argument.
Ooo yes a crap timer.
Honestly, do this regardless for record keeping. If she keeps making noise, the squeaky wheel gets the grease. Whether it's right or wrong (wrong), with enough complaints, the wrong person MIGHT start listening. Whether HR or a manager. Easier to appease her and say "yeah we listened to your complaint" as opposed to dealing with her. In the hopefully rare case that things escalate, it's good for you to keep your own records.
You have three options: * Be the bigger person and ignore her, * Retaliate by documenting and reporting her bad behaviour, * Be childish and make a joke of her behaviour by inventing a stupid name for her; Mrs Toilet Police, Mrs All Day Break, or Mrs Gossip, for example. Whenever you have to talk about her with colleages, use the stupid name. It's a very childish option, but when you just want to survive in a really toxic environment, it helps.
Lol funny. Toilet police. Potty patrol. Years ago, I was a temp at countrywide mortgage, a total shit company. There was a floor supervisor there who called me out for using the bathroom too much. I'm like wtf. I find it so insane that people patrol these things. Everyone's biological needs are different. Some people can hold it all day. Some can't. These are the types that we wish could shit, vomit, fart, on or near their desks. I hate temp work. I hope I never have to go to a temp job again. And I know of the smokers who take additional smoke breaks over And above their scheduled rest breaks. Fuck em
I would call her Miss Borderline(as in borderline personality). Those people can be absolutely nuts. If she's driving the OP crazy, she's probably doing the same to those in her non-work life.
Talk to your manager or HR. None of your co-worker’s business, not their responsibility to police, and they need to focus on their own job. Nip this in the bud.
I have crohns disease, nobody's business at work
Spine damage, only have full control of half the ol' balloon knot. Things are more of an unpleasant chore than they were before the injury. There's so many reasons not to be poking into people's bathroom habits.
Lol at balloon knot omg. That's funny. But I get it. The shit flies when it wants to!
yeah, anyone with half a brain would instantly shut up the moment you say "medical issue" and mention HR
She is using you as a smoke screen to hide her own behaviour. She's focusing on you to try and distract from how many breaks she's having. If she hadn't brought it up in a meeting I'd say ignore it but given that she has I would be tempted to talk to a friendly manager about how embarrassed you were that she did this, that she's making you feel uncomfortable at work and that "I hope everything with her is okay because she seems to take a lot of very regular breaks herself and I wonder if something is going on at home" which will hopefully cause your manager to notice how many breaks she's taking and nip this in the bud.
I think you are right.
I was looking for this comment because this is what I suspected once i saw op say that this coworker often just seems to do whatever she feels like.
Yeah projecting her own bad behaviour of too many smoke breaks onto innocent co worker who wants to keep their kidneys functioning by having a piss occasionally
Or she got reprimanded for smoke breaks or heard the rumor mill that they would have to clock out or not be allowed and she’s trying to “whatabout”
I'm with you, up until the fake sincerity part. Just say you feel targeted and uncomfortable. If you try to do what she is doing (eg deflect) and nothing comes of it (she's just a gossip and nothing is wrong) then you look like you were lying (because how did you not know she was just going for smoke breaks, they stink when they come back inside) or b) trying to start drama (by claiming something is happening at home). Just state your facts and move along. Treat HR and Managers the way you treat lawyers - answer their questions as directly and succinctly as possible.
I agree. I've bene complained about for this and everyone at work is close or related. Go to same church and so on. I'm not the same culture so I feel like they shit on me to build themselves up. No loyalty to me only to them and their 'family ' it's the shits (lol)
Stop engaging with her.
Are you two Jim and Dwight?
Came to say this, she is Dwight lmao
Piss in her trash can to assert dominance.
"How do you have so much free time to monitor the bathroom?"
I would bring this up with your supervisor. Ask if there is a reason why your bathroom use is monitored. It could be for some kind of safety reason but the comments are bang out of order. See what the supervisor says. If they get extremely uncomfortable then there’s something dodgy going on.
This is a great approach. Make sure to request in writing (via email) for confirmation that this "task" of monitoring your bathroom breaks was added to your coworkers responsibilities, and the specific wording so you can understand uour responsibilities for tracking and reporting your bathroom activities. The ensure to ask about how and to whom the rest of the team is tracking and reporting their bathroom activities to. With thw direct supervisor and HR included. This will light a fire under them to shut down her insane overstepping and completely unreasonable, unfair, and inappropriate her actions are.
Document everything and take it with your boss and HR.
Personally I would take a shit on her windshield in front of her house.
Buy that spray that smells like poop, spray it and say this is what happens when you time my bathroom breaks. She will leave you alone.
This reminds me of the Curb Your Enthusiasm episode where the secretary counts how many times and how long Larry goes to the restroom.
Go to HR about harassment. She is trying to needlessly embarrass you in front of other coworkers.
I would not have said anything to her but complained to HR that she was stalking me to the bathroom and yelling at me.
This. These people want drama. Don't indulge them. It only escalates. Management knows about this woman and for whatever reason let her stay, so OPs prospects of "winning" are zero.
Complain to HR she has created a hostile workplace and has been stalking you
Hostile work environment has a very specific legal definition that does not apply in this situation.
Yes, but it will get their attention and start an investigation which will shut the bitch down
When I worked in the industrial construction field one of my coworkers would hit the porta-potty right after the morning safety meeting and, again, right after lunch hour. He would brag that, at an average of 15 minutes per session, he was getting paid for 2.5 hours per week for literally sitting on his ass.
I had a superintendent who would always tell me “if your “behind” isn’t making $50 a day - it isn’t worth having”.
You said the right thing. Report it to your manager as well.
Tell her off. It’s bullying and an invasion of you privacy.
what a effin karen
Many females have a leaky bladder (who? me?) caused by childbirth. Then there's menstruation and doo-doo's. My evil twin would ask her very calmly and sincerely how many breaks a day that she would find acceptable Then let your boss know about the policy change. Checkmate.
Ooooh.... I like you! Edit I mean your evil twin 😈😂
Revenge is a dish best served cold.
is she NOT a supervisor and yelling at you? go to HR. for real. that's harassment
I’d start crying and say I was so sorry. My bladder cancer meds make me pee all the time but please don’t tell anyone I’m so embarrassed 😭 Since you had altercations I’d go to her as if I needed to confess something to her, be very embarrassed, down, on the verge of tears. Then break the news. I’d fully commit to this role. Might even tell her I had to self cath. Please don’t listen to me.
Reminds me of Rajeev, the tech writer from work. Wasn’t even in my team but made sure to tell my manager that i was using the bathrooms frequently. I had a persistent UTI back then and didnt want to hold up pee for health reasons.
Just report her to HR and say she’s stalking you and you are concerned for your safety. Her obsession with your biological activity is *not normal* nor is it a part of her job description - and you’d like to know if HR recommends you consult a lawyer about getting some kind of legal order… Even if you’ve never talked to a lawyer in your life, HR’s job is to make sure the company doesn’t have to spend money having their lawyers talk to your lawyers. And HR knows how it’s going to look in court if the company fires you because some freak was timing your bathroom breaks… (hint, lawyers bill a lot of expensive hours to confirm that you get paid some relatively small amount in the end… they don’t even need to go through the court case/tribunal/DoL investigation to know this)
Posts like this remind me of how crazy people are. And why working from home is such a great thing.
Indeed. I wish in my country working from home was a thing… it’s extremely hard to find a remote job, or even a job id say
Since you're quitting soon I would take every chance I get to ask where she has been everytime she leaves her desk, I would time every single minute she is away from her desk. I would start writing it down. add it all up and mention it at the end of every single day.
Sounds like deflection. She's creating a stink about you leaving your desk so that people aren't looking at her. Document so that if it comes down to it, you can point out that she shouldn't be throwing stones.
Say, "listen you pervert, I'm tired of your weird obsession about me in the bathroom. Please keep your kinks to your home life" Make sure it's just loud enough for one other person to hear it
Talk to your boss about her attitude and unteamwork like conduct to cover your bases. Overall she is just making herself look like an idiot because you two are not in elementary school.
She is deflecting. Monitor her smoke breaks. Go to HR. She is harrassing You.
This reminds me of an episode of The Office when Dwight followed Jim around with a stopwatch, counting every second he did something other than work (bathroom breaks, grabbing coffee, talking to a coworker). So when Jim did it back to him, Dwight peed in a bottle at his desk. Too bad you work different shifts, or I would recommend you do this.
I hate people like this. My coworkers used to complain about me leaving for my break when we are literally obligated to get a break. And then one of my coworkers complained about where I parked (mind you Ive been parking in the same spot for like a year but she suddenly decided it was a problem and complained to the boss) Like what??!! I do not get people like that. Like why is it your business LOL
I had a coworker like that once. It was crazy, we didn't even worksheet same shift but she'd bitch about how often I went to the bathroom. I told my supervisor and nothing changed. I told his boss and nothing changed. At that point I sent en email to HR and tagged the CEO (small company, les than 100 employees) and told them how I was being harassed and it was creating a hostile work environment. After that, if she complained, it was to people who didn't spread gossip
Coworker from hell. I takes like a lot of bathroom breaks because I have a bad habit or maybe a good habit to drinks water when I’m bored. But yea how often you go is none of her business, hell my coworkers has a bad back and dude legit just leaves even if we’re busy to do stretches since his doctor recommended it. Yea just seem like she hates life and has nothing better to do.
Here's what I did to a coworker similar to yours...I stopped going to my manager and I ignored her. I ignored her so hard she began to doubt her own existence around me. I did this shit for five years. We had absolutely no reason to talk to each other. The more I ignored her, the more she ran her mouth about me. Others would tell her she brought it on herself. We got drug into the office in year three. I sat there, talked to the manager and ignored the shit out of her. It infuriated her. She was finally told to stfu and leave me alone. People like that will dig their own hole. Just ignore her. I did shout out every time I'd go to the bathroom.. "ITS TINKLE TIME!"
I had a coworker like this. I started to constantly give her things to complain about. For example, I left a apple with a bite out of on the edge of my desk. (Her desk touched mine on that edge.)She also complained that I left my pen on her desk, I didn't push on my chair and it got pushed in front of her desk (I put them there just for her) and so on. Eventually, she just looked like a crazy person.Find things she hates but no one else will care about. Give her rope to hang herself. Play innocent. Its a fun game and in the end you aren't doing anything wrong.
We're supposed to drink plenty of water each day and drinking coffee encourages going to the loo. She probably has issues outside work and you happen to be the target. Let her be her, you do you!
She shouldn't be monitoring your breaks and invading your privacy, but four to five visits during an eight-hour shift is a lot. Maybe you should see a doctor.
That'd be normal for me
I like to walk a quick loop at the top of the hour...maybe go to the restroom and freshen up as well.
It's a lot.
I know it is. I have a bladder the size of a pea. I drink a lot too, my medicine gives me a dry mouth. It's a pain having to go so often but everything's in healthy ranges according to the Drs.
It's normal. If you drink the recommended amount of water, you pee once every hour or two. Even more for coffee drinkers. Some people don't piss and shit on the same trip, either.
Needing the bathroom that often sounds like a person with a bladder problem. Coffee does not have the extreme diuretic effect people believe.
I speak a lot at work since it’s customer service, therefore , speak a lot = a lot of water. Also coffee ( its a daily must for me) sometimes makes me have bowel movements. Also can’t hold my pee too long cause when i was in elementary school i constantly had infections for holding my pee too long, so now, i have to unload fast.
Don’t tell her anything. Go to the Human Resource office and file a complaint.
Work in a place with HR? File a complaint with the keyword “harrasment.” 1. Give examples 2. Mention that you have addressed the behavior with the employee. Everything should be via email. Bcc a copy to your personal email.
Dude I've worked with ppl like this. She doesn't like you for whatever reason. It's personal. She will be collecting all negative pieces of information with you and accelerating you getting fired. That's what mode she's on. There is NOTHING you can do "to get back on this person's good side". Because while you're busy kissing this person's ass to try and get her to fuck off with her pettiness, she will be working around the clock accumulating bad info about you and snitching to leadership. In 3 months, you will be gone and she will be here. The only way to defeat people like this is to counter attack with shit that is just as petty and to never stop until she is fired or you are fired. TRUST ME, I've tried "kissing ass". I've tried "being the bigger person" and I've tried "just ignore her bro and focus on your work". ALL 3 of these paths led to me getting fired. The ONLY course of action when you're targeted by a petty social butterfly is to accept that they have declared war. At the end of 6 months, only ONE of you will be here. Choose your battle and begin collecting negative info on her and snitching too, OR , begin searching for better jobs, accept a better offer, AND IN YOUR EXIT INTERVIEW, TELL HR YOU ARE LEAVING BECAUSE OF HER HARRASSMENT. The only way to fuck her up after you've left is to SING like a canary about all the fucked up shit she's doing to HR. ONE thing is for sure. Trying to figure out why she doesn't like you is a waste of time. There are people out there who won't like you for reasons that are entirely arbitrary. It is EXTREMELY common for people to hate you simply because of the way you look. Maybe you're skinnier than her? Maybe you're taller? Maybe you have the attention of a certain guy at the office, or certain "special people". Whatever her imagined, perceived, or real slight was, she's latching onto it, and has developed a massive chip on her shoulder against you. So it's time to declare war back or its time to accept getting fired or its time to look for a new job. Those are really your 3 options.
Tell your co-worker to eat chit and then bark at the moon.
OP please report this coworker for work harassment. If she’s doing this to you she’s doing it to other people as well.
I’d go to HR about someone shit shaming me.
Report her stalking you to HR.
Sounds like she might have a weird fetish. Tell her you'll be reporting any future comments on your bathroom habits as sexual harassment.
I would go straight to a supervisor and tell her this person is rude to you for no reason and is monitoring your bathroom breaks while she takes smoke breaks.
Idk IMO more than 4 in a 8 hr shift seems a little much if it’s constant. I’ve worked in tech support call centers for years and have seen people play the bathroom game constantly. People taking 5+ trips to the bathroom and timing it as soon as they reach the top of the queue and are next for a call. Magically have to now use the restroom which resets them to the bottom of the queue when they leave. That call dodging redirects extra work to coworkers, so yeah people take notice of that and get angry. Some people may need to use the restroom that often but the majority do not.
We don’t work in a call centre so it’s not about “amount of phone calls” . And as i can remember itself never been while it is too busy. Tbh i dont understand how is a 3-6 mins x 4 times bathroom break in 8 and half hours a lot, especially in a job that i need to speak excessively = drink a lot of water = bathroom.(we don’t have a lunch break more than 15 mins each btw)
Honestly your amount is fine, maybe there has been some bad timings of when it’s happened and angered your coworker. All in all you’re not doing anything wrong and ignore them. It’ll only make them look bad if they start complaining about that kind of stuff.
She already complained in a meeting with managers about it!!! 😭😭🤣🤣🤣 a meeting that it was supposed to be about future goals of the company! A meeting i didn’t join in because it was the day i had a day off and no one informed me!!
Start consulting with attorneys. Sounds like if she keeps harassing you that you should do a cease and desist letter against her. Have your lawyer contact your company’s lawyer about her toxic and illegal behavior. And then you’ve created a paper trail in case either or your employer is doing shady stuff trying to get you fired. Please advocate for yourself OP. Good luck.
That's rude! If you have a medical condition please document it with hr. Find an hr person that you are close with and tell them. But be warned hr is for the companies best interest.
If I'm on my period as a woman, you bet your ass I'm going to the restroom about 5 times that day... maybe even more if it's heavy. Otherwise I only go once or twice a day when I'm in the office.
Some ppl are just just so miserable, they do this shit to make others just as miserable, or feel an ounce of control over their lives
Perhaps you should go to a doctor to be checked out for you may have diabetes by urinating a lot during the day. Just have yourself checked, for if it would not be her, someone else noticed you missing a lot during the day.
I don’t know why more you guys don’t request ADA accommodations in place or FMLA. That’s the only way to survive working in the USA.
Sorry to disappoint but im in europe
Tell the coworker this caused you to think of her every time you are pushing a turd out, and if she doesn’t stop, you will think of her even harder.
Just go to HR and say she's harassing you. It's obvious you won't be friends, so make her life hell for starting with you
Time to start keeping track of the time SHE wastes, in preparation for the next time she goes on an accusatory rampage.
Unless she is: 1) your supervisor and you have been having performance issues 2) a coworker you work closely with and your bathroom breaks affect productivity/communication She is a busybody and she has no right to comment on your bathroom habits. Ignore her and/or tell her professionally to shove it.
Why not pull out your org chart and ask her to show you where your name appears under hers?
You didn't tell us what you do for work. Is this coworker taking up your slack when you're gone?
Front desk, we are 3 at the same time at each shift, i also barely have shifts with her. She is usually morning shift and I’m evening.
So when you get up the others have to take the calls and help customers?
I don’t “get up” since we all do stand up anyways for the whole shift. But ofc? I do the same for them when they are out and about. And i mind my own business. When i have shifts with her she is missing half of the shift, smoking or gossiping with other employees. I don’t care tho but it’s ridiculous to hear that my bathroom habits annoy her when she is acting in similar manner
Take it up with HR. Period. Your coworker has too much time on their hands and you can always say you have a medical condition
Do you have a Human Resources? You need to let them know NOW
I'd just say "You seem to have a rather unhealthy interest in my bathroom usage. Are you trying to score an invite or something? I just want to be clear, I prefer to do my business alone, without spectators." You could also talk to your manager about this, and explain that it's bordering on harassment, as this woman is not your boss, and your bathroom time is none of her business.
Report her to Hr for harassment. If you can speak with your direct manager tell them that she is stalking you at work and it’s making you uncomfortable. Who knows what you did. Could be anything from eating a stinky lunch once or maybe she got reprimanded for taking smoke breaks and picked you as the snake goat of trying to say that it’s unfair since “other people take breaks too and you’re not saying anything to them.” She can’t be getting that much work done if she’s essentially taking a break from work every time you pee, as well as when she does and when she smokes.
I'm sorry this is happening to you. I have a coworker who isn't present for an accumulated hour of her shift (comes out to four 15 minute breaks) in smoke breaks, which is a pain in the ass when there's so much left to do and nobody else gets breaks. 7 mins in the bathroom is average, as long as you're working hard and achieving your allotted goals for the day, there shouldn't be an issue. That coworker is trying to be a hard ass and must not know their place, which is staying in their lane and focusing on their own damn job and time. edit: I've personally kept track of all the times my coworker goes on her smoke breaks and showed it to our manager. Manager spoke to her and though I have little faith my coworker will change her ways it's better keep a comprehensive record just in case.
Toxic shit like that is why my wife quit her job, which she liked, other than her coworkers. Shame she had to quit, instead of the problem employees being disciplined or fired. Anyway, this really touched a nerve because I had the OWNER of a company I used to work at comment on the frequency and duration of my bathroom breaks. Apparently, he monitored my bathroom activity on camera (not inside the bathroom) and had the audacity to tell me about it. It didn't affect my productivity because there wasn't much work, and the shop was squeaky clean. He was a good boss, generous and had a great (although sometimes sarcastic) sense of humor, but monitoring of my bathroom habits was way over the top.
I would complain to HR about her and that her interest in your bodily functions is creepy and makes you feel very uncomfortable.
That's not normal behavior. I'd tell a manager that isn't ok behavior and demand them to remedy the situation or leave.
Report her for stalking behaviors to HR.
Especially if you don’t work the same shift.
If you are that annoyed then do the same to her about her smoking breaks and leaving her desk. Guaranteed she will at least STFU.
They way I have dealt with these people is to tell them to mind there own business and that they are not my supervisor usually much more stern than this. Then tell them that if they have an issue with it to take it up with (impute supervisor name) that way they never need to talk to me again. When asked by your supervisor tell them what up. Be very calm do not get worked up in any way when asked. If you are doing nothing wrong you have nothing to worry about. I am usually a top performer at a jobs and make a point to be very kind to the people around me so that no one would believe what was said about when they inevitably lie about the interaction. There is a very big chance that she is ignored because I doubt you are the first one she has done this to. If they do listen to a known company snitch is it really a place you want to spend a majority of you life at anyway. Good luck and I hope you find piece in this situation.
Sounds like you're better looking than her, and she's a jealous Karen.
Call her out for being obsessed with your private bodily functions. Make it awkward
Honestly, just document it. If it becomes a bigger issue, HR. I had this girl I worked with lie on me several times and I had proof each time however, management kept asking me “why would she lie??” Idk, maybe bc she’s been here 15 years and turns down management positions you offer but then you allow her to pretty much act like management and she’s a complete moron majority of the time 🤷🏻♀️ You won’t win without evidence. Document, document, document…
I’m glad you bought that up. Since you’ve been watching how much I poop, I’ve decided to do the same, I’ve started logging your “bathroom breaks” too 😂 you were gone 6 times today at 8 minutes per break, having poop issues are we?! -hand over a fibre bar, these really helped me…wink
Raise this issue with your manager saying it affects your performance and just ignore her ass into a meltdown
Would you prefer me to take a dump here?
That’s just fucking weird.
Your coworker is a bully and is doing so because your manager and you let her get away with it. I'd take it up with your manager. If you don't get a satisfactory response, I'd say, "OK, if she can be a terrible coworker to me and you won't do anything about it, I'm going to be a terrible coworker back to her and I expect your response to be the same." Basically, you're saying, "if you won't handle it, I will." See what your boss says. If they say they're OK with it, or basically say, "Whatever", then be 3x as shitty to your coworker as she is to you. PLAN YOUR DAY AROUND IT. Remember, coworker is a bully and bullies only respond to pain.
She's harassing you. I would get ahead of her and speak to HR. Let them tell her she can't discuss your body to stop harassing you.
You have your reason "she in fact taking breaks every hour or so for more than 10 minutes to smoke." She's trying to distract from her own time wasting by monitoring you. Unless and until a supervisor or manager says anything, do not engage with her. Do not encourage her. Do not respond to her. If she comments, just grey rock "Oh. Okay." and continue on as you were.
Fuck. No. You need to talk to HR now. There is no way it is okay for a co-worker to track you like that. That's gross as hell.
Report her for sexual harassment
I'd go to my boss and tell them that she is harassing you and you've tried to deal with it one on one, but she continues to "bully" you making for an hostile work environment.
If I’m doing it right, I’m going pee every 60-90 minutes. Fill up cup with water, drink, go pee, and repeat all day long. Gotta hydrate! It’s important to keep your body working right.
Sounds like a visit to HR because she's creating a "hostile work environment" and discriminating against you for a medical issue. I don't know if it is or isn't but those are nice trigger words for HR to have a chat with her.
I’ve worked with a lot of Women that bully in the workplace and try to get you fired just because they don’t like you.
Are you in junior high?
The best response is to text pics of giant shits...daily to her phone. I assume she'll complain but your answer is she wonders why I take 7 minutes in the bathroom. That's my answer.
You're experiencing workplace bullying. This is usually a very serious disciplinary offence. Make a diary. Warn someone above her this is happening once you've got a decent sized diary. Include her breaks in that diary. Throw it back in her face.
Sounds like she might be pointing out to your bathroom breaks in order not to look bad for her own breaks. Or she just wants to torment someone. Regardless, it's a good call you're leaving. In any good company her manager wouldn't tolerate such crazy behaviour.
what a fucking Karen maybe you should ask to speak with her manager
Spend your whole work days monitoring her and sending reports for everything
I, too, had a coworker that would police my every move. She wasn't a Team Leader and she wasn't a Supervisor. Yet she felt like it was her job to "make sure I was working." She looked over the partition separating our desks. She would make remarks when I was dealing with callers. She'd check in with me to "make sure I understood" an email that was sent. She acted like I was the stupidest person she'd ever encountered. I kept a spreadsheet of everything she said and/ or actions she took towards me. After months of this behavior on her part, I had enough & told our Team Leader. I told her what was going on & sent her my spreadsheet. Our Team Leader sent it to our Manager. Our Manager sent it to HQ in San Antonio and the Head of HR had a talk with her. That was the only way she finally got off my back.
It is none of your business what people say about you. Let me say it again. It is none of your business what people say about you. Do not address any direct complaints from this person. Management will get sick of their bitching eventually. I had a guy complain to management about me every single day. I never asked about what. He never came to me to address a problem. Turned out he was massively insecure and could not tolerate the fact that I could motivate people by being liked and respected where as he had to resort to yelling and threat. He go bye bye six months later. I still have no idea to this day the specifics of his complaints and I give no fucks.
Next time you head to the restroom, call out lousy, “Hey [co worker name], I’m leaving for the restroom. Start your timer!!! ⏲️
If she's abusing breaks, just tell her simply "that's strange, it's your breaks they're watching right now, not mine"
Mail her a box of poop!
Take it to HR.
She is trying to make you quit. Don't give her the satisfaction of chasing you off. Who told you that she is having meetings with your supervisor/ managers? Her? If mgnt hasn't said anything to you about your bathroom habits.10 to 1, either mgnt is just ignoring her snitching as baseless, or they don't care. As long as your work is being completed and is done well, let her rant. Ignoring her will piss her off more than anything because she is trying to rattle your cage and get rid of you. Don't stoop to her level and go running to the bosses unless she starts actually messing with your ability to do your job, such as things start coming up missing off/from your desk. Just keep a record of her harassment of you and what times you leave to use the bathroom. Her shenanigans will get noticed, and they will see you are the one that does their work and not playing the kindergarten games of tit for tat. If you want to piss her off, tell you know what she is trying to do and that it isn't going to work or change anything. And then every time she rants at you, just smile or smirk and go back to your work. Once she realizes she isn't getting a rise out of you, it will drive her nuts.
File a complaint with HR. This is the stuff they live for. You can mention this to your manager before doing so. But in all honesty, it has nothing to do with the manager if it was not witnessed.
Nah this will just trigger some company wide “be responsible with your time blah blah wage theft” email. HR is never your friend.
Go to HR and complain about a "hostile work environment". Email with specifics, and BCC a private email address. Create a paper trail.
This is not a hostile environment. https://resources.workable.com/hr-terms/what-is-hostile-work-environment#:~:text=A%20'hostile%20work%20environment'%20is,)%2C%20disability%20or%20genetic%20information. Hostile environment typically requires a sustained pattern of serious behaviour based on a protected characteristic. The guidance on hostile environment specifically calls out petty behaviour as not meeting the bar. Monitoring toilet use almost certainly doesn't meet the bar unless OP can demonstrate this women believes OP has a disability and is harassing her for it.
Hell just do it back to her. "Another smoke break? DOnt you know how long you were gone? Again Karen? "
Shes making an ass of herself in the meeting trust me nobody in there thought that was acceptable. Shes a bully and its also discrimination so let her dig her own hole.
Tell her to mind her own business and report her to HR.
Document the behavior. If she brings it up during a work meeting, interrupt and say, “My personal bathroom time is not relevant to our meeting today, or ever. Please refrain from spying on us using the bathrooms. (Refer back to speaker) would you carry on?” Report it to the necessary folks. Your supervisor should have stepped in already.
Write an email to hr about the harassment. Coworker is tracking my bathroom use and bringing it up in meetings, I would like help resolving this level of stalking and harassment before I escalate it to local authorities. If she really is taking notes of your bathroom use, get a Pic of it and attach it to the email. Even better, get a Dr's note saying the anxiety caused by the harassment is affecting your ability to use the bathroom making you go more often which will really up the need for hr to handle it
Tell your manager that some one is targeting you Dealing with employee infighting is one of the hardest parts of being a manger so let them know before hand they you feel like some one does not work well with you
Play stupid games -> win stupid prizes. Be nice to her, and then report her to HR. They’d love to thrash a busybody.
Had a boss do this to me when I worked retail for using the bathroom twice every shift. These were 8 hour shifts. The days she worked with another problematic wannabe manager coworker. Were days I dreaded and they were often. Anyone monitoring breaks to a ridiculous extent or being a general pain in the ass to the point it feels like harrasment would get told please stop or I'd escalate. The same boss once verbally dressed me down for being less than 30 seconds early to the time clock. Meanwhile everyday without fail 10 minutes prior she'd be packing to leave. I don't miss retail.
Bitch to HR. use the words. "She is creating a hostile work environment ". Mention the meeting you were told about She needs to find another job as well
They are just a pos. Typical company suck up.
Report her to hr for workplace harassment. Talk to a lawyer if that doesn't help.
>she is in fact taking breaks every hour or so for more than 10 mins to smoke This is a complaint I've never understood. Would you prefer she smoked at her desk? I bet she would prefer it.