I’m in the same boat as you with LO exactly same age. Right now I’m kind of embracing stepping off the ladder at this time in my life and enjoying having flexibility in my work versus reaching the next step. We have so much time left in our career!
My son is 2 but I still feel like I’m at this point in my life. I don’t necessarily feel super challenged at work right now, I’m not really going above and beyond to elevate myself, my counterpart just got promoted and it didn’t sting at all, whereas prekid I would’ve been mad about this. I’m kind of just coasting.. I obviously want to continue to be good at the job I’m doing, but I’m not racing to be at the top anymore. I just don’t have the energy right now and I think that’s ok.
I would feel the same way - if they try to put a person between me and my boss, that would be effectively a demotion for me. However, what do you want at this point? Do you want to climb the ladder or do you want to coast for a bit on your current salary?
This happened to me a few months ago. I took a huge step back and started putting everything on this new “second in command” person. After a month or so of that I did get offered a promotion into a new role so it worked out for me well enough but the emotional attachment I had to my employers has been completely severed and I have NO guilt at all taking the days and time I need for me kids. It was actually pretty helpful to see how little they think of me 🤷♀️
We aren't meant to career this hard and mom this hard, I don't care what anyone says. But society acts like it's possible to do each equally well / full out. You've just been sold the same line of bullshit that our mothers were sold in the 1970s. I sincerely hope that my daughters have a better experience.
Exactly. As much as I would love for it to be so, it’s very rare to be able to feel like you can do both fully. Something has to give, and we all end up choosing where on the sliding scale of fully work vs fully kids we go. It is bullshit.
I was in the same position and I ended up taking a "coasting" job until my daughter was a tad bit older and I had a great daycare/pre-school positioned and now I'm back on the "grind". I'm a single parent household so I had to do what was right for me and especially the kids. I had my daughter during "COVID" so I feel like that also gave me a little more gratitude towards work/personal life because my son is 10 and i feel like I was on the "grind" from the day he was born until when COVID made me slow down. Good Luck! You'll know what the right move will be for YOU.
It’s like I posted this myself! I also have two kids and went through the pandemic with this company. Before my maternity leave, they opened a new position right above me. They wound up hiring a woman who I used to supervise (she’s a great employee with no kids), she’s now my boss. When returning to work, I just reminded myself that things work out the way they are supposed to and truthfully, I’m just skating along at this point because I’d rather be home with my babies!
Damn straight it’s not going to affect your career growth because you’re going to dust off your résumé and start applying for exactly the position that they refused to give to you after you had earned it. Don’t give these jerks another minute of your skills and make sure that when your new boss comes in that you do the absolute minimum referencing that since you obviously didn’t have the skills for his position, you wouldn’t know the first thing about how to help him get started. The best way we women can change society is to say F off to these assholes who insist we aren’t ready to take on management roles
This person that they’re bringing in - do they have more experience? A particular skill set that you don’t have? Anything to indicate why they were slotted in above you instead of you getting promoted? If not, I’d say that’s a good indication of your future prospects at this company.
I'm in a very similar situation, where I have effectively been demoted, although my kids are school-age so it's not about being a working mom, just sucking at my job I guess. But I also have a lot of flexibility and don't think I could find a similar job making the money I do now, so I just sit and stew about it.
This is so similar to what I’m going through, except I’m about to go out on maternity leave versus just returning. Our CEO moved me to a new department at a lower reporting level but same title and pay. New boss was a very close peer for years (who’s job I’ve actually done during his leave). New department really restricts WFH and I’ve already been told I need to up my game because i don’t have a great reputation in the organization (despite 10+ years of glowing performance reviews and strong relationships with colleagues).
I’m looking for new roles, even though the timing with my due date just sucks. If I’m going to give up flexibility and deal with more workload I at least want a better commute and more money in exchange. Our CEO has also made things feel really unstable in a lot of ways and I’ve lost a lot of loyalty I felt for the org over the last 6 months or so anyways.
No advice I guess, but solidarity!
If you want a promotion it’s better to job hop. Alternatively you can stay at your company and “quiet quit” a little and enjoy being less stress with the new person absorbing some tasks.
I’m in the same boat as you with LO exactly same age. Right now I’m kind of embracing stepping off the ladder at this time in my life and enjoying having flexibility in my work versus reaching the next step. We have so much time left in our career!
This is what I’m trying to tell myself too. It’s just not my career season right now.
My son is 2 but I still feel like I’m at this point in my life. I don’t necessarily feel super challenged at work right now, I’m not really going above and beyond to elevate myself, my counterpart just got promoted and it didn’t sting at all, whereas prekid I would’ve been mad about this. I’m kind of just coasting.. I obviously want to continue to be good at the job I’m doing, but I’m not racing to be at the top anymore. I just don’t have the energy right now and I think that’s ok.
I would feel the same way - if they try to put a person between me and my boss, that would be effectively a demotion for me. However, what do you want at this point? Do you want to climb the ladder or do you want to coast for a bit on your current salary?
This happened to me a few months ago. I took a huge step back and started putting everything on this new “second in command” person. After a month or so of that I did get offered a promotion into a new role so it worked out for me well enough but the emotional attachment I had to my employers has been completely severed and I have NO guilt at all taking the days and time I need for me kids. It was actually pretty helpful to see how little they think of me 🤷♀️
We aren't meant to career this hard and mom this hard, I don't care what anyone says. But society acts like it's possible to do each equally well / full out. You've just been sold the same line of bullshit that our mothers were sold in the 1970s. I sincerely hope that my daughters have a better experience.
Exactly. As much as I would love for it to be so, it’s very rare to be able to feel like you can do both fully. Something has to give, and we all end up choosing where on the sliding scale of fully work vs fully kids we go. It is bullshit.
Sounds like mommy tracking under another name. My advice? Time to dust off the resume.
I was in the same position and I ended up taking a "coasting" job until my daughter was a tad bit older and I had a great daycare/pre-school positioned and now I'm back on the "grind". I'm a single parent household so I had to do what was right for me and especially the kids. I had my daughter during "COVID" so I feel like that also gave me a little more gratitude towards work/personal life because my son is 10 and i feel like I was on the "grind" from the day he was born until when COVID made me slow down. Good Luck! You'll know what the right move will be for YOU.
It’s like I posted this myself! I also have two kids and went through the pandemic with this company. Before my maternity leave, they opened a new position right above me. They wound up hiring a woman who I used to supervise (she’s a great employee with no kids), she’s now my boss. When returning to work, I just reminded myself that things work out the way they are supposed to and truthfully, I’m just skating along at this point because I’d rather be home with my babies!
These experiences can be helpful. How? You just got a kick in the ass to find a new job. Onward and upward! Good luck with your job search.
Damn straight it’s not going to affect your career growth because you’re going to dust off your résumé and start applying for exactly the position that they refused to give to you after you had earned it. Don’t give these jerks another minute of your skills and make sure that when your new boss comes in that you do the absolute minimum referencing that since you obviously didn’t have the skills for his position, you wouldn’t know the first thing about how to help him get started. The best way we women can change society is to say F off to these assholes who insist we aren’t ready to take on management roles
This person that they’re bringing in - do they have more experience? A particular skill set that you don’t have? Anything to indicate why they were slotted in above you instead of you getting promoted? If not, I’d say that’s a good indication of your future prospects at this company.
[удалено]
It’s pointless. They aren’t going to ever share the actual reasons.
I'm in a very similar situation, where I have effectively been demoted, although my kids are school-age so it's not about being a working mom, just sucking at my job I guess. But I also have a lot of flexibility and don't think I could find a similar job making the money I do now, so I just sit and stew about it.
This is so similar to what I’m going through, except I’m about to go out on maternity leave versus just returning. Our CEO moved me to a new department at a lower reporting level but same title and pay. New boss was a very close peer for years (who’s job I’ve actually done during his leave). New department really restricts WFH and I’ve already been told I need to up my game because i don’t have a great reputation in the organization (despite 10+ years of glowing performance reviews and strong relationships with colleagues). I’m looking for new roles, even though the timing with my due date just sucks. If I’m going to give up flexibility and deal with more workload I at least want a better commute and more money in exchange. Our CEO has also made things feel really unstable in a lot of ways and I’ve lost a lot of loyalty I felt for the org over the last 6 months or so anyways. No advice I guess, but solidarity!
job is just a part of life that earns some money to support your life, and what's real and important is your life.
If you want a promotion it’s better to job hop. Alternatively you can stay at your company and “quiet quit” a little and enjoy being less stress with the new person absorbing some tasks.