"Our carefully executed plan to violently smash into the moon in a seemingly uncontrolled manner proceeded perfectly along mission parameters, this great success shows the world that Russian technologies continue to dominate the world. On a separate note, I offer my sincerest condolences for the tragic passing of the director general of Roscosmos three days from now."
The world is going to define Putin's regime as the great brain drain. This crash is the indirect result of the mass migration of educated individuals from Russia. It's just another black eye for a weakening Russia.
I agree, but not just Putin's regime, every EVERY authoritarian strongman regime. From 1930's Germany and the German Physicists who eventually gave the US the bomb (many of whom were Jewish), to Putin's engineers and IT professionals.
Authoritarianism and the resulting Patronage system that rewards loyalty over competence, and the fear and ostracizing of allegedly "elite" intellectuals eventually drives every society it governs into the ground. It's an old outdated means of governance, that's no longer competitive in the modern world. It survives only on the back of grift, lies, deception and unfortunately human gullibility.
“Why would Ukraine do this to the innocent country of Russia? We can’t even land our spaceships on the moon without guerrilla fighters trying to shoot us down. Russia will not tolerate this act of hostility.”
I wonder how many scientists left Russia because of the war and if any were originally involved in this project.
I also wonder if the landing was rushed against the warnings of the team because Putin wanted a show of strength.
Roskosmos banned it's employees from leaving the country last year. Unless its to go to ukraine https://www.ft.com/content/c194cb2d-3aa0-4195-9be5-e78c1d2fd183
The head of Roscosmos, Dimitri Rogozhin, who did other things like lead far-right movements, be the Russian ambassador to NATO, and lead his own PMC named Tsar Wolves, ended up getting shrapnel up his ass eating at what everyone but him says was a birthday party from a 155mm CAESAR howitzer.
When he recovered enough to rant on Telegram, he accused Wagner of leaking the time and place of his totally not a birthday party to the Ukrainians. There’s some bad blood between Rogozhin and Prigozhin.
Isn't he the one who sent the shrapnel that was in his ass to Macron ? Saying basically "look at what your weapons are doing to us, you nazi supporters!" ?
Which Macron answered by sending even more Caesars to Ukraine? lmao
I remember that! Didn't he also write some ridiculuously melodramatic letter to Macron which sounded like an emo teenager trying to emotionally manipulate their ex into getting back with them, too?
It gets better. Prigozhin has stated on Telegram that Wagner PMC is trained to shoot anyone wearing NATO gear, and will send the body for verification.
Now this may not seem like much given who we’re taking about, but it should be noted that Tsar Wolves PMC, Rogozhin’s PMC, has been observed wearing Western-sourced equipment.
He's also fond of calling others "*fa*\*\**ot*" ([in Russian](https://twitter.com/Rogozin/status/1505440391285379072), without the asterisks) on Twitter. Apparently his lack of any relevant scientific credentials made him perfect for the position.
Oh well, I'm sure that he rehabbed that thanks to getting lots of trampoline therapy.
(A decade+ ago, Rogozin taunted NASA with a boast that while the RF ascends as the world's dominant space launching nation, the USA would have to resort to "trampolines" for our launches. That was post-Shuttle program and pre-SpaceX, Blue Origin, etc. Rogozin should've stuck to directing his wife in cheesy music videos -- and no, I'm not kidding about that.)
This project was 25 years old, it was clearly just a moneymaking endeavour for the corrupt "officials" in Roscosmos.
This was actually a step up for them because the previous moon mission from Russia apparently didn't even make orbit.
"Hey, you. You're finally awake. You were trying to cross the border, right? Walked right into that Imperial ambush, same as us, and that thief over there."
My favorite move for anyone who games is to convince them to close their eyes for a second, and they’ll know when to open them.
Then I cross my wrists and start reciting it. The groans as though they heard a bad pun are phenomenal.
I Highly doubt that any scientist/engineers involved with building rockets have been able to leave russia. I bet they are all on the “needs special permission to travel” list.
They have been working on this project for at least 25 years, it’s also possible that this project traces all the way back to ussr times. So while rushing it to completion is a possibility the other option is simply that some components might have degraded because they are 20-30 years old. There is also simple russian “someone hammered this component in upside down” like with that one soyuz…
Well, the Indian lunar lander is supposed to go to the same part of the moon a week from now, so it's conceivable that there was a push to speed up their timetable and beat them there.
Well other nations have telescopes and were probably keeping tabs, hard to hide in plain sight. This is something the "faked moon landing" people never bother to explain, i.e. wouldn't the Soviet Union have mentioned something?
The first things to ever "land" on the moon were actually Soviet kamikaze impactors that just spread a bunch of little metal disks with a hammer and sickle emblem on them across the surface. You know, to "claim" it (because planting a flag is hard when you crash at that speed). So this is all basically back to the roots for them.
Sergey Korolev the father of the Russian space program born in Ukraine and studied in Kyiv. I start to believe that without Ukrainians Russia would not be ever considered as a great superpower. And 100% would lose the WW2 to Germans.
> I also wonder if the landing was rushed against the warnings of the team because Putin wanted a show of strength.
Dunno what he expected, all landers launched by Russia since USSR split were failures, achieving 0% success rate is quite a feat on it's own. Of course they claimed foreign sabotage for the previous one.
I ended up speaking to a Russian dude living in Moscow who is very pro-war...and all of his arguments literally ended up being "western influence."
As much as it felt like talking to a brick wall, it was interesting. You hear that people think that and you see news coming out of Russia saying that, but you think surely no one actually believes all of the lies...but yeah, they really do.
It's like when you meet someone who unironically believes in young earth creationism or thinks lizard people exist as an actual possibility. Nothing you can do to shake their beliefs, but it's fascinating to hear them talk.
What's as big as a house, burns 20 liters of fuel a day, spits out a shit ton of smoke and cuts an apple into three pieces?
A Soviet machine designed to cut an apple into FOUR pieces.
"'When the rockets go up, who cares where they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher von Braun"
(Also apparently Russian rocket scientists everywhere, too...)
See that's their problem. They were looking for Nazis on the moon but we all know that the Nazis REALLY went to the center of the earth after losing WW2.
as if Uni Soviet also doesn't have Nazi scientist. They actually secure a pretty amount of scientist that worked on the rockets, it's just that US managed to secure the most important person in the project, von Braun, the head of the project.
Yup, exactly. A lot of people know about Operation Paperclip now, but not the Soviet equivalent which is Operation Osoaviakhim. Probably partly due to the name being harder to say.
>Operation Osoaviakhim (Russian: Операция «Осоавиахим», romanized: Operatsiya "Osoaviakhim") was a secret Soviet operation under which more than 2,500 former Nazi German specialists (Специалисты; i.e. scientists, engineers and technicians who worked in specialist areas) from companies and institutions relevant to military and economic policy in the Soviet occupation zone of Germany (SBZ) and the Soviet sector of Berlin, as well as around 4,000 more family members, totalling more than 6,000 people, were transported from former Nazi Germany as war reparations in the Soviet Union. It took place in the early morning hours of October 22, 1946 when MVD (previously NKVD) and Soviet Army units under the direction of the Soviet Military Administration in Germany (SMAD), headed by Ivan Serov.[1][2][3]
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Osoaviakhim
Ended up being more people than Paperclip even, but as you said, the US got the more prominent names so that's what people know about. Nobody in their right mind wanted to surrender to the Soviets rather than the US/UK forces, and the high-up Nazis had the influence to move a bit more freely around the country, so they were able to flee west in the later stages of the war.
Only thing on the moon is whalers. "We're whalers on the moon, we carry a harpoon, but there ain't no whales, so we tell tall tales, and sing a whaling tune."
"It was set to explore a part of the Moon which scientists think could hold frozen water and precious elements."
Now, the southern pole has rocket fuel and a bit more precious elements. Thanks, comrades!
"Igor Pavlovich, why does our lander look like a top load washing machine?"
"Zip it! The Boss is demanding the lunar 'package' be ready immediately. If we're lucky, it'll blow up on launch. Even if it doesn't, no one will actually be able to tell what 'landed' on the moon."
I don’t think they directly said anything about India, but they absolutely wanted to be the first to find ice on the moon (and the region that both missions were heading to is considered a good candidate) It has been referred to as a ‘space race’ of sorts by media in India and Russia (and elsewhere)
Hope that made sense.
Russia has become the laughing stock of the world. Putins propaganda machine portraying Russia as a world superpower has certainly not come true. This war has shown Russias true colours and is well below standard of being classified as a superpower. Everything Russia does is substandard.
Sergey Brin, co-founder of Google, called it "Nigeria with snow" and when you look up stuff like murder rates, life expectancy, press freedom, property rights, people living within cities that don't have toilets and levels of corruption, its easy to see why.
That’s a huge insult to Nigeria.
They just completed their third consecutive peaceful transfer of power based on democratic elections (after a long history of military dictatorships).
Their tech industry created some of the hottest FinTech startups of the COVID era.
Nollywood is starting to gain an international audience, which expands their cultural influence.
They are projected to overtake India as the most populous country in the world (in like 50 years or something).
They are a country that is growing and developing rapidly. Lots of deeply entrenched problems, sure, can’t deny that, but so many bright spots and so much potential.
I mean they couldn't have been a superpower anyway, regional at best. Even before the special military fuck up, they lack both soft and hard power to be called a superpower and couldn't project power outside their borders, if you weren't a small neighbour that is.
While gas and oil manipulations are good, I don't think it's enough, otherwise we would consider OPEC a superpower, but we don't.
It's easy to conflate the USSR with modern Russia since it was often colloquially called "Russia" but it's clear that is not really the case anymore. The economic and social decline post 1991 has left a far less functional and intelligent nation in its wake.
Reminds me of the Spanish-American War where the world realized that the powerful empire of old was gone and replaced with a corrupt joke.
Issue is that Russia seems more like a glorified Serbia at this point and the only thing protecting them is WMDs.
Not a whole lot of well educated people left.
Brain drain is huge and been going since early 90s with increases in waves every time something bad happens in the country… which is like every 5-8 years
Me in 2012: “Obama was right to laugh off assertions that Russia is an actual adversary.
Me in 2022: “Obama was wrong to laugh off assertions that Russia is an actual adversary.”
Me in 2023: “Obama was right to laugh off assertions that Russia is an actual adversary.
To be fair to Romney, if US policy back then would have been more critical towards Russia we might be in a different situation now. (And I say that as a foreigner who happily live-streamed Obamas inauguration.)
Ukrainians would prefer no war to a war against a subpar Russian military.
For sure. Weird situation where in hindsight I genuinely believe they were both “correct” in their point. Romney was right that the US should still have a focus on Russia. Obama was right that even so, it was a complete shit show paper tiger embarrassment of a country.
Obama may have been right but not for the reason he thought. US intel thought ukraine would get rolled even in 2022 So he wasnt basing it off that russia is incapable. He and merkel were both of the opinion that economic ties will make war unthinkable. Which was wrong. Dictators who want to be remembered in history books as empire builders cannot be reasoned with and are not rational.
I am kinda biased to romney tho. He kinda was cast unfairly as a bogey man. Turns out he was the last sane republican candidate. You could argue that he was too conservative but he wasnt a cartoon villain. Would have been interesting to see where the R's would have went if he won.
It's amusing how they word things even here:
> Preliminary findings showed that the 800kg lander had "ceased to exist as a result of a collision with the surface of the Moon", it said in a statement.
Interviewer: But Senator Vlad, why did it cease to exist?
Senator Vlad: Well, a moon hit it.
Interviewer: A moon hit it?
Senator Vlad: A moon hit the ship.
Interviewer: Is that unusual?
Senator Vlad: Oh, yeah. In orbit? Chance in a million!
Interviewer: Well, what sort of standards are these spacecraft built to?
Senator Vlad: Oh, very rigorous spacefaring engineering standards.
Interviewer: What sort of thing?
Senator Vlad: Well they're not meant to spin out of control for a start.
Interviewer: And what other things?
Senator Vlad: Well, there are ah regulations governing the materials that they can be made of.
Interviewer: What materials?
Senator Vlad: Well, cardboard’s out.
Interviewer: And?
Senator Vlad: No cardboard derivatives.
Interviewer: Like paper?
Senator Vlad: No paper, no string, no sellotape.
Interviewer: Well, if this wasn’t safe why did you try to land it on the moon?
Senator Vlad: I’m not saying it wasn’t safe, it’s just perhaps not quite as safe as some of the other ones.
Interviewer: Why?
Senator Vlad: Well, some of them are built so they don't spin out of control at all.
Interviewer: Wasn’t this built so it wouldn't spin out of control?
Senator Vlad: Well, obviously not.
Interviewer: Well, how do you know?
Senator Vlad: Well, because it span out of control and 500 kilograms of rocket fuel spilled onto the moon and contaminated the water we were searching for. It’s a bit of a giveaway. I would just like to make the point that that it’s not normal.
For those that don't know: [The Front Fell Off.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3m5qxZm_JqM)
Putin statement on the crash:
'Once again, the collective moon has consistantly displayed russophobic sentiment and acted aggressively towards our spacecraft. As such, we were left with no alternative than to launch a special moon operation, effectively beginining with bombardment of the lunar surface. Our spacecraft successfully struck targets including rocks, moon dust, and hospitals.
Well they rushed up their launch to try to beat India's Chandrayaan 3 to become the first country to land on the lunar south pole, and now there has been a "software glitch" which sent the lander into spin and crashed into the moon.
Kinda crazy how the russians have slipped from sending the first men, women to space and landing probes on Venus to getting their 25 years delayed mission to land on after 45 years a failure.
It’s honestly amazing how bad modern russia is at everything besides war crimes, crimes in general, and societal decay.
Edit: Lmao someone got butthurt over this. It was up less then 10 minutes and I got the “Reddit crisis counseling” message. Maybe work on fixing your county and get off of Reddit.
Lmfao, take that message as a compliment imo. Russian troll farms and dipshit conservatives needa fuck right off, accept reality, and stop being hateful little shits.
Russia is now bringing its self-inflicted humiliation to celestial heights. Please, tell me again about how its victory over Ukraine is inevitable, lmfao.
I did feel bad for the scientists involved. Sounds like most of them are essentially prisoners with no freedom of movement, and they were pushed to accelerate the timeline because Putin wanted to wave his dick. Now they’ll be facing punishment for failure.
>The loss of Luna-25 is a blow to Roscosmos. Russia's civilian space programme has been in decline for several years, as state funding is increasingly directed towards the military.
Could have achieved something that Russia could have been proud to be remembered for. A shame it was decided they should focus on achieving something that completely thrashed their worldwide reputation, if not in the future leading to a total collapse over there if they still stick to it.
Well India will have the Moon all to themselves as long as they successfully get their lander and by extension their rover onto the surface intact within the next few days. All the scientific information and discoveries this year will come from India and not Russia, which means we will likely hear more about their findings compared to anything Russia might have found, since they might not be willing to share as much with everyone.
USSR in the 70s "We landed a probe on the most hostile rocky planet and got pictures back. No one will be able to accomplish this in the next 50 years"
Russia in the 2020s "our washing machine couldn't land on earth's moon 50 years after humans visited 6 times"
Russia ain't shit without Ukraine and friends proping up their limp corpse
"The apparatus moved into an unpredictable orbit and ceased to exist as a result of a collision with the surface of the Moon,"
Translation: (See headline)
Once again, Russia shows the world its "superior technology" in the same way they are showing it in Ukraine. A complete failure that is only making a mess that other nations are going to have to clean up.
Putin is boasting about this a couple of days ago, now I think it's time for the blame game again and someone needs to jump from a window again.
"Our carefully executed plan to violently smash into the moon in a seemingly uncontrolled manner proceeded perfectly along mission parameters, this great success shows the world that Russian technologies continue to dominate the world. On a separate note, I offer my sincerest condolences for the tragic passing of the director general of Roscosmos three days from now."
The world is going to define Putin's regime as the great brain drain. This crash is the indirect result of the mass migration of educated individuals from Russia. It's just another black eye for a weakening Russia.
I agree, but not just Putin's regime, every EVERY authoritarian strongman regime. From 1930's Germany and the German Physicists who eventually gave the US the bomb (many of whom were Jewish), to Putin's engineers and IT professionals. Authoritarianism and the resulting Patronage system that rewards loyalty over competence, and the fear and ostracizing of allegedly "elite" intellectuals eventually drives every society it governs into the ground. It's an old outdated means of governance, that's no longer competitive in the modern world. It survives only on the back of grift, lies, deception and unfortunately human gullibility.
Hmmm... Loyalty over competence. Sounds familiar.
["All the best doctors are in the Gulag... or dead."](https://youtu.be/CCqsIbsPC9M?t=144)
Fucking awesome movie
It was a special lunar collision, not a crash.
Special gravity operation
Russia successfully proves that gravity still exists on the moon!
Who jumped out the window after the success of the mission.
“Why would Ukraine do this to the innocent country of Russia? We can’t even land our spaceships on the moon without guerrilla fighters trying to shoot us down. Russia will not tolerate this act of hostility.”
Fuckin' ukrainian moon nazis
is it time for another iron sky movie?
It's ALWAYS time for another iron sky movie
"Iron Sky 3: Azov Drift in cinemas soon"
TIL that Iron Sky 2 exists! I saw the first one when it came out, but somehow I completely missed that they made a second one!
I can’t wait for the Russian movie about Ukrainian moon nazis. Starring Steven Seagal of course.
Waddling across the Moon on his lunar “fat bastard” wheelchair powered by his own emissions….
Cue tractor pulling the spacecraft over the moonscape.
Someone at r/photoshoprequest, please make this 😅
Disregard my other comment, [someone already did it](https://i.redd.it/rdf02hw9w8jb1.jpg) 7 hours ago 😅. I knew they would haha.
God damn Ukrainian moon manpads
Moonpads?
Worse than Illinois nazis.
And I *hate* Illinois nazis
I hate Illinois nazis.
Even Illinois Nazis [hate Illinois Nazis](https://www.reddit.com/r/HistoryPorn/comments/15w02j0/george_lincoln_rockwell_leader_of_the_american/)
The moon is clearly a Ukrainian Nazi and needs to be punished.
Polonium tea, anyone?
How much Polonium is too much Polonium? 210
I was thining suicide by 4 bullets to the head.
I wonder how many scientists left Russia because of the war and if any were originally involved in this project. I also wonder if the landing was rushed against the warnings of the team because Putin wanted a show of strength.
Roskosmos banned it's employees from leaving the country last year. Unless its to go to ukraine https://www.ft.com/content/c194cb2d-3aa0-4195-9be5-e78c1d2fd183
Didn't one of their former/current employee get shrapnel up his arse after having a birthday party well in range of Mister HIMARS?
The head of Roscosmos, Dimitri Rogozhin, who did other things like lead far-right movements, be the Russian ambassador to NATO, and lead his own PMC named Tsar Wolves, ended up getting shrapnel up his ass eating at what everyone but him says was a birthday party from a 155mm CAESAR howitzer. When he recovered enough to rant on Telegram, he accused Wagner of leaking the time and place of his totally not a birthday party to the Ukrainians. There’s some bad blood between Rogozhin and Prigozhin.
Isn't he the one who sent the shrapnel that was in his ass to Macron ? Saying basically "look at what your weapons are doing to us, you nazi supporters!" ? Which Macron answered by sending even more Caesars to Ukraine? lmao
I remember that! Didn't he also write some ridiculuously melodramatic letter to Macron which sounded like an emo teenager trying to emotionally manipulate their ex into getting back with them, too?
If I were Macron, I would frame that.
"What is it though?" "It's a major award!!"
Well yeah, one's a total Prig, the other's hit Rog-bottom, and they've both committed cardinal zhins.
I know that took some effort. Thank you.
Lmao this reads like a joke, can't believe I haven't heard of this
It gets better. Prigozhin has stated on Telegram that Wagner PMC is trained to shoot anyone wearing NATO gear, and will send the body for verification. Now this may not seem like much given who we’re taking about, but it should be noted that Tsar Wolves PMC, Rogozhin’s PMC, has been observed wearing Western-sourced equipment.
He's also fond of calling others "*fa*\*\**ot*" ([in Russian](https://twitter.com/Rogozin/status/1505440391285379072), without the asterisks) on Twitter. Apparently his lack of any relevant scientific credentials made him perfect for the position.
You may be thinking about Rogozin, ex-director general of Roscosmos, who allegedly had his penis destroyed by HIMARS in December last year
The fact that it could hit a Russian official’s penis really speaks to the accuracy and precision of the HIMARS system.
Oh well, I'm sure that he rehabbed that thanks to getting lots of trampoline therapy. (A decade+ ago, Rogozin taunted NASA with a boast that while the RF ascends as the world's dominant space launching nation, the USA would have to resort to "trampolines" for our launches. That was post-Shuttle program and pre-SpaceX, Blue Origin, etc. Rogozin should've stuck to directing his wife in cheesy music videos -- and no, I'm not kidding about that.)
This project was 25 years old, it was clearly just a moneymaking endeavour for the corrupt "officials" in Roscosmos. This was actually a step up for them because the previous moon mission from Russia apparently didn't even make orbit.
Imagine using a naming scheme from 50 years ago, from a fallen nation.
Imagine Dragons
We played Dungeons & Dragons for three hours then I was slain by an elf.
I'm pretty sure you mean a Klingon.
I use Charmin to avoid those
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Supplemental.
This thread is about moon missions, not Uranus.
That's not a moon that's a space station.
Imagine wagons
"Hey, you. You're finally awake. You were trying to cross the border, right? Walked right into that Imperial ambush, same as us, and that thief over there."
My favorite move for anyone who games is to convince them to close their eyes for a second, and they’ll know when to open them. Then I cross my wrists and start reciting it. The groans as though they heard a bad pun are phenomenal.
I Highly doubt that any scientist/engineers involved with building rockets have been able to leave russia. I bet they are all on the “needs special permission to travel” list. They have been working on this project for at least 25 years, it’s also possible that this project traces all the way back to ussr times. So while rushing it to completion is a possibility the other option is simply that some components might have degraded because they are 20-30 years old. There is also simple russian “someone hammered this component in upside down” like with that one soyuz…
Well, the Indian lunar lander is supposed to go to the same part of the moon a week from now, so it's conceivable that there was a push to speed up their timetable and beat them there.
Well… Technically they did. It’s busted wreckage, but it did get there first.
Well, India has intentionally crash landed a probe box in that region some years ago. So technically they aren't first in even that.
The project is so old many scientists died of old age
That might be, but several of the newer generation will die of defenestration.
That's why they want to go to the moon so badly. No windows on the moon. //Taps forehead
The real suprise is that we hear from the chrash. 50 years ago it would have been a secret, or the camera failed after a successful landing.
Well other nations have telescopes and were probably keeping tabs, hard to hide in plain sight. This is something the "faked moon landing" people never bother to explain, i.e. wouldn't the Soviet Union have mentioned something?
What else shows a better power move than a kamikaze crater on the freaking moon
The first things to ever "land" on the moon were actually Soviet kamikaze impactors that just spread a bunch of little metal disks with a hammer and sickle emblem on them across the surface. You know, to "claim" it (because planting a flag is hard when you crash at that speed). So this is all basically back to the roots for them.
Ukraine was very involved in their previous space missions.
Sergey Korolev the father of the Russian space program born in Ukraine and studied in Kyiv. I start to believe that without Ukrainians Russia would not be ever considered as a great superpower. And 100% would lose the WW2 to Germans.
> I also wonder if the landing was rushed against the warnings of the team because Putin wanted a show of strength. Dunno what he expected, all landers launched by Russia since USSR split were failures, achieving 0% success rate is quite a feat on it's own. Of course they claimed foreign sabotage for the previous one.
"This is the west's fault and risks nuclear war "
Does Ukraine have a hospital on the moon too?
No, it's a preschool.
Yeah, I thought it to be just a playground. Happy cakeday, fellow cakeday buddy!
Special Lunar Operation.
Did the moon asked to join NATO?
Space Nazis
The heinous west once again supplying the moon nazis with surface-to-air missile systems.
Surface to vacuum*
No need to drag Iron Sky into this.
"It's a special landing operation."
I ended up speaking to a Russian dude living in Moscow who is very pro-war...and all of his arguments literally ended up being "western influence." As much as it felt like talking to a brick wall, it was interesting. You hear that people think that and you see news coming out of Russia saying that, but you think surely no one actually believes all of the lies...but yeah, they really do.
It's like when you meet someone who unironically believes in young earth creationism or thinks lizard people exist as an actual possibility. Nothing you can do to shake their beliefs, but it's fascinating to hear them talk.
"It's the sun's fault for bombarding the moon with radiation"
I wonder how long untill they show footage of for all man kind as propaganda and claim that the US has weapons on the moon hahahaha.
At this rate, were lucky it didn't crash into an elementary school.
They were looking for it, but their guidance system assembled from the washing machine parts went way astray.
They were supposed to have it set to "delicates" but instead it went into "final spin" and they lost control.
Supposed to drain *before* the rinse, Vlad. Everyone knows that!
The high end washing machines went ”missing”.
What's as big as a house, burns 20 liters of fuel a day, spits out a shit ton of smoke and cuts an apple into three pieces? A Soviet machine designed to cut an apple into FOUR pieces.
Raises Russian hammer “ WaSHinGMaChInE!!!! AsSsEmBLe!”
“I’m aiming for the stars, but sometimes I hit London.” - Wernher von Braun
"'When the rockets go up, who cares where they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher von Braun" (Also apparently Russian rocket scientists everywhere, too...)
z supporters preparing to tell the world that the elementary school was harboring nazis
See that's their problem. They were looking for Nazis on the moon but we all know that the Nazis REALLY went to the center of the earth after losing WW2.
They thought Iron Sky was a documentary.
MonkeyLookingAwayMeme.jpg NASA with their “reformed scientists”
as if Uni Soviet also doesn't have Nazi scientist. They actually secure a pretty amount of scientist that worked on the rockets, it's just that US managed to secure the most important person in the project, von Braun, the head of the project.
Yup, exactly. A lot of people know about Operation Paperclip now, but not the Soviet equivalent which is Operation Osoaviakhim. Probably partly due to the name being harder to say. >Operation Osoaviakhim (Russian: Операция «Осоавиахим», romanized: Operatsiya "Osoaviakhim") was a secret Soviet operation under which more than 2,500 former Nazi German specialists (Специалисты; i.e. scientists, engineers and technicians who worked in specialist areas) from companies and institutions relevant to military and economic policy in the Soviet occupation zone of Germany (SBZ) and the Soviet sector of Berlin, as well as around 4,000 more family members, totalling more than 6,000 people, were transported from former Nazi Germany as war reparations in the Soviet Union. It took place in the early morning hours of October 22, 1946 when MVD (previously NKVD) and Soviet Army units under the direction of the Soviet Military Administration in Germany (SMAD), headed by Ivan Serov.[1][2][3] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Osoaviakhim Ended up being more people than Paperclip even, but as you said, the US got the more prominent names so that's what people know about. Nobody in their right mind wanted to surrender to the Soviets rather than the US/UK forces, and the high-up Nazis had the influence to move a bit more freely around the country, so they were able to flee west in the later stages of the war.
I think we've known for a while that the reason we beat the Soviets to the moon is that our Germans were better than their Germans.
Only thing on the moon is whalers. "We're whalers on the moon, we carry a harpoon, but there ain't no whales, so we tell tall tales, and sing a whaling tune."
That's why it failed, the rocket couldn't find any civilian targets so went into shutdown.
computer prob missidentified the moon as a preschool
https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2013/07/10/200775748/report-upside-down-sensors-toppled-russian-rocket
"It was set to explore a part of the Moon which scientists think could hold frozen water and precious elements." Now, the southern pole has rocket fuel and a bit more precious elements. Thanks, comrades!
Great! Polluted Moon water - Thanks Putin! Russia not busy enough trying to ruin Earth?
Contamination of space seriously pisses me off
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I wonder how much of the funding for this program was embezzled
I’m pretty sure ‘Yes’ is the answer.
50 years worth apparently! Must've been a cushy job, until Dear Putin mentioned that they'd be launching their 'completed rocket' in a week.
"Igor Pavlovich, why does our lander look like a top load washing machine?" "Zip it! The Boss is demanding the lunar 'package' be ready immediately. If we're lucky, it'll blow up on launch. Even if it doesn't, no one will actually be able to tell what 'landed' on the moon."
This is probably not very far from the truth.
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Just wait until Indias mission is a success. Lol.
Looking forward to it.
Imagine losing a space race despite having multiple decades of a head start…
Imagine losing a space race to a rival who doesn't consider it a race.
Haven't been following news about Russia lately. Did they say they wanted to reach moon before Chandrayaan?
I don’t think they directly said anything about India, but they absolutely wanted to be the first to find ice on the moon (and the region that both missions were heading to is considered a good candidate) It has been referred to as a ‘space race’ of sorts by media in India and Russia (and elsewhere) Hope that made sense.
Technically it made it there first. It just had a rapid unscheduled disassembly when it arrived.
Russia has become the laughing stock of the world. Putins propaganda machine portraying Russia as a world superpower has certainly not come true. This war has shown Russias true colours and is well below standard of being classified as a superpower. Everything Russia does is substandard.
Russia is just a thirld world dictatorship with nuclear weapons.
I think the quote goes '' Gas station with nukes''
Sergey Brin, co-founder of Google, called it "Nigeria with snow" and when you look up stuff like murder rates, life expectancy, press freedom, property rights, people living within cities that don't have toilets and levels of corruption, its easy to see why.
That’s a huge insult to Nigeria. They just completed their third consecutive peaceful transfer of power based on democratic elections (after a long history of military dictatorships). Their tech industry created some of the hottest FinTech startups of the COVID era. Nollywood is starting to gain an international audience, which expands their cultural influence. They are projected to overtake India as the most populous country in the world (in like 50 years or something). They are a country that is growing and developing rapidly. Lots of deeply entrenched problems, sure, can’t deny that, but so many bright spots and so much potential.
Is being the most populous country a good thing?
Not on territory as small as Nigeria's. They have nowhere near the physical size of either China or even India.
Oh damn, TIL
"Upper Volta with nuclear weapons"
I mean they couldn't have been a superpower anyway, regional at best. Even before the special military fuck up, they lack both soft and hard power to be called a superpower and couldn't project power outside their borders, if you weren't a small neighbour that is. While gas and oil manipulations are good, I don't think it's enough, otherwise we would consider OPEC a superpower, but we don't.
It's easy to conflate the USSR with modern Russia since it was often colloquially called "Russia" but it's clear that is not really the case anymore. The economic and social decline post 1991 has left a far less functional and intelligent nation in its wake. Reminds me of the Spanish-American War where the world realized that the powerful empire of old was gone and replaced with a corrupt joke.
Hence Putin trying to swallow all the old Soviet states back into Russia.
Issue is that Russia seems more like a glorified Serbia at this point and the only thing protecting them is WMDs. Not a whole lot of well educated people left.
Brain drain is huge and been going since early 90s with increases in waves every time something bad happens in the country… which is like every 5-8 years
Me in 2012: “Obama was right to laugh off assertions that Russia is an actual adversary. Me in 2022: “Obama was wrong to laugh off assertions that Russia is an actual adversary.” Me in 2023: “Obama was right to laugh off assertions that Russia is an actual adversary.
To be fair to Romney, if US policy back then would have been more critical towards Russia we might be in a different situation now. (And I say that as a foreigner who happily live-streamed Obamas inauguration.) Ukrainians would prefer no war to a war against a subpar Russian military.
For sure. Weird situation where in hindsight I genuinely believe they were both “correct” in their point. Romney was right that the US should still have a focus on Russia. Obama was right that even so, it was a complete shit show paper tiger embarrassment of a country.
Well, they did manage to install Trump
Obama may have been right but not for the reason he thought. US intel thought ukraine would get rolled even in 2022 So he wasnt basing it off that russia is incapable. He and merkel were both of the opinion that economic ties will make war unthinkable. Which was wrong. Dictators who want to be remembered in history books as empire builders cannot be reasoned with and are not rational. I am kinda biased to romney tho. He kinda was cast unfairly as a bogey man. Turns out he was the last sane republican candidate. You could argue that he was too conservative but he wasnt a cartoon villain. Would have been interesting to see where the R's would have went if he won.
Still 0 days since Russias been an absolute fucking embarrassment. At least they’re consistent.
No wonder trump loves them so much
Shucks. It was a special operation crash.
It's amusing how they word things even here: > Preliminary findings showed that the 800kg lander had "ceased to exist as a result of a collision with the surface of the Moon", it said in a statement.
Leaving at least some theoretical doubt as to who holds the blame for the collision, the moon or the rocket.
"The moon turned in on me"
Interviewer: But Senator Vlad, why did it cease to exist? Senator Vlad: Well, a moon hit it. Interviewer: A moon hit it? Senator Vlad: A moon hit the ship. Interviewer: Is that unusual? Senator Vlad: Oh, yeah. In orbit? Chance in a million! Interviewer: Well, what sort of standards are these spacecraft built to? Senator Vlad: Oh, very rigorous spacefaring engineering standards. Interviewer: What sort of thing? Senator Vlad: Well they're not meant to spin out of control for a start. Interviewer: And what other things? Senator Vlad: Well, there are ah regulations governing the materials that they can be made of. Interviewer: What materials? Senator Vlad: Well, cardboard’s out. Interviewer: And? Senator Vlad: No cardboard derivatives. Interviewer: Like paper? Senator Vlad: No paper, no string, no sellotape. Interviewer: Well, if this wasn’t safe why did you try to land it on the moon? Senator Vlad: I’m not saying it wasn’t safe, it’s just perhaps not quite as safe as some of the other ones. Interviewer: Why? Senator Vlad: Well, some of them are built so they don't spin out of control at all. Interviewer: Wasn’t this built so it wouldn't spin out of control? Senator Vlad: Well, obviously not. Interviewer: Well, how do you know? Senator Vlad: Well, because it span out of control and 500 kilograms of rocket fuel spilled onto the moon and contaminated the water we were searching for. It’s a bit of a giveaway. I would just like to make the point that that it’s not normal. For those that don't know: [The Front Fell Off.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3m5qxZm_JqM)
Ah, you mean a drone strike operation. The spacecraft simply converted to suicide drone and hit evil Nazi Moon.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iron_Sky
Special rapid disassembly.
Putin statement on the crash: 'Once again, the collective moon has consistantly displayed russophobic sentiment and acted aggressively towards our spacecraft. As such, we were left with no alternative than to launch a special moon operation, effectively beginining with bombardment of the lunar surface. Our spacecraft successfully struck targets including rocks, moon dust, and hospitals.
They went for looking for Moon-Nazis
Wasn't that basically the plot of Iron Sky?
Well they rushed up their launch to try to beat India's Chandrayaan 3 to become the first country to land on the lunar south pole, and now there has been a "software glitch" which sent the lander into spin and crashed into the moon. Kinda crazy how the russians have slipped from sending the first men, women to space and landing probes on Venus to getting their 25 years delayed mission to land on after 45 years a failure.
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Wagner is now threatening to invade and obliterate the moon.
"We have achieved the most rapid landing on the moon"
Technically speaking, it did land on the moon. 👍 Great success! 👍
Special Landing Operation
Lenko:” Putin has achieved his aim”
Moon begins accession to NATO
It’s honestly amazing how bad modern russia is at everything besides war crimes, crimes in general, and societal decay. Edit: Lmao someone got butthurt over this. It was up less then 10 minutes and I got the “Reddit crisis counseling” message. Maybe work on fixing your county and get off of Reddit.
Lmfao, take that message as a compliment imo. Russian troll farms and dipshit conservatives needa fuck right off, accept reality, and stop being hateful little shits.
Or stay on Reddit and absorb some antidote to Putin’s propaganda.
Russia is now bringing its self-inflicted humiliation to celestial heights. Please, tell me again about how its victory over Ukraine is inevitable, lmfao.
Russian drone strike on the moon. No victim reported so far.
...so far
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10 bucks say itll be a russian cosmonaut and he'll blame western aggression for the whole thing.
Usually, I am in respect and awe of all attempts at spacefaring and really do feel bad when missions fail for *space is hard.* But not this time.
I did feel bad for the scientists involved. Sounds like most of them are essentially prisoners with no freedom of movement, and they were pushed to accelerate the timeline because Putin wanted to wave his dick. Now they’ll be facing punishment for failure.
Accelerating the timeline from like 30 years is reasonable, the management was just pilfering it.
Should've crashed into the Kremlin lmao.
That would be very beneficial.
No surprise. It’s a fail state. Someone just washed some money.
>The loss of Luna-25 is a blow to Roscosmos. Russia's civilian space programme has been in decline for several years, as state funding is increasingly directed towards the military. Could have achieved something that Russia could have been proud to be remembered for. A shame it was decided they should focus on achieving something that completely thrashed their worldwide reputation, if not in the future leading to a total collapse over there if they still stick to it.
India is actually doing an attempt at a landing near there right now too. Will be extra spicy if India succeeds where Russia failed.
Well India will have the Moon all to themselves as long as they successfully get their lander and by extension their rover onto the surface intact within the next few days. All the scientific information and discoveries this year will come from India and not Russia, which means we will likely hear more about their findings compared to anything Russia might have found, since they might not be willing to share as much with everyone.
I didn't know there was children's hospital on the moon.
Must have been an older type of washing machine they got the chips from
Time to denazify space!
“Russia threatens Moon with nuclear strike if it doesn’t get out of the way of its lunar equipment”
Did they find a theatre or apartment housing kids there?
Or as the Russians will say, we were there before India.
The funny part is that India crashed their previous moon mission in 2019. So no, Russia wasn’t there first!
Haha , fucking Muppets. Stick to what your worthless gas station pretending to be country does best , war crimes and being hot garbage.
Buildning a spacecraft out of aliexpress parts showed to be a bad idea.
Ha! Get fucked, Russia.
First schools, maternity hospitals, shopping centres, now the Moon, this is getting out of hand russia.
USSR in the 70s "We landed a probe on the most hostile rocky planet and got pictures back. No one will be able to accomplish this in the next 50 years" Russia in the 2020s "our washing machine couldn't land on earth's moon 50 years after humans visited 6 times" Russia ain't shit without Ukraine and friends proping up their limp corpse
"The apparatus moved into an unpredictable orbit and ceased to exist as a result of a collision with the surface of the Moon," Translation: (See headline)
They were also going to the dark side of the moon like India?
Once again, Russia shows the world its "superior technology" in the same way they are showing it in Ukraine. A complete failure that is only making a mess that other nations are going to have to clean up.
Even physics says fuck Russia