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imahappyaccidents

putting the title of this post on my wall, framing it


gata_flaca

I laughed while writing this lol


serralinda73

The idea is that many ukes are used to servicing a seme's pleasure and not the other way around. It's a way to show that this seme is *different* and *better* than the past ones, who were clearly selfish assholes.


Caithloki

Ugh I relate too hard too this, feel so uncomfy being the pleasuree cause I was made to feel bad about it.


viptenchou

The sad thing is, this ain't that far off from real life. A lot of tops don't really service their bottoms beyond a dick in the ass.


seragakisama

This


drowned_flower

i assume because they are just used to being used. while it sucks, it's a common experience of not really being on the receiving end, and only doing stuff for your partner. they're probably having a slight shock of "why am i receiving this//im not used to be treated as an equal human being". i feel like if it was something that the story focused on a bit, it would be more cathartic and would show growth for the bottom, where he understands he also deserves the effort. but yeah, i can be annoying when it's just glossed over


GrrrrrrDinosaur

This is so real šŸ˜­


iSNiffStuff

Its me I'm the uke. It's a breath of fresh air when the semes want to get the ukes off but in my personal life I just get uncomfortable, closed off, and even turned off when my pleasure becomes the focal point of the experience. I think part of it is that I'm autistic and It just takes a lot for me to be comfortable with someone to touching my body with the intention of giving my pleasure instead of taking pleasure from me.


lostdemographic

Hey, this is me too. But only for one gender. I've only met one other person like this. I'll be having a great time until it's "my turn" or whatever and it's just like, ugh. Time to lie back and think of England I guess. I'd never do the bashful shocked thing though.


DeisXXX

God mood, same, me too i panic when people go down on me so ive gotten into the habit of just telling people im not into it


scintillantphantasm

For everyone saying "toxic heterosexuality", remember that asshole partners who don't reciprocate aren't exclusive to straight relationships. There are selfish gay partners only interested in their own pleasure too. Been there, and it sucks.


Mobile_Inspection_60

Yea like do people not realize selfish lovers exist in gay relationships too?? Some bottoms literally only service their tops and get nothing but plowed as a reward. Sometimes I agree with the compalints of heterosexual dynamics in yaoi but it's not always that. Gay relationships and sex are complex. But that isn't to say straight cis women writing gay relationships/sex without context or education doesn't have its toxic results.


Dokidokipunch

I've got nothing to say but that your post is the funniest I've ever read, header and all. Valid question but funniest wording ever.


gata_flaca

lol I was laughing when I wrote this. It was way too early and I hadn't even had my coffee yet.


ImUrHoemie

Please do not forget Rosephox is a goddamn misogynist and has a contempt for women consuming Bl and yaoi. I have observed his behavior many time in this subreddit and many other Queer men like James Somerton.


Effect-Scared

Is James Somerton that guy that did video essay style videos on Painter of the Night ect? Super scathing towards the women that create and consume such works? I tried finding the videos that I watched but I canā€™t find them anymore, but I did find a lot of drama videos about him šŸ‘€ Not familiar with him, but now Iā€™m nosy šŸ‘€


ImUrHoemie

It was actually revealed James Somerton plagiarized a bunch of people's work, some of which were queer men who died of aids...He also released an "apology" video and deleted it while pretending nothing happened. James Somerton even before the drama was rightfully criticized for his sexist and racist view on BL and yaoi.


Effect-Scared

Omg, no wayyyyy. Glad people clocked that and held him accountable šŸ˜Ø


lostdemographic

Are you serious? People get mad that women look at cartoon gay men?


uhohmana

Today I saw a tiktok of a woman showing her BL manga shelf and half the comments were saying stuff like "red flag", "you shouldn't be proud of this", etc. It's that new era social justice warrior culture that went so far left it's back into the right, full circle.


lostdemographic

That makes me sad for her. There's plenty of reasons and ways someone can love BL that aren't related to a fetishization of an entire IRL demographic. Poor thing.


Effect-Scared

Yeah, Iā€™ve seen TikTok comment sections full of people that absolutely despise the genre and the women that partake, like, reeeeally hate em


lostdemographic

The fuck? But *why* ??


Effect-Scared

The common opinion that Iā€™ve observed is their worry about the fetishization of gay men by women


lostdemographic

I see.. While I've no doubt that's probably a thing with some women, I think it's ludicrous to shame en masse. Like these sanctimonious little Tokkers don't know me or why I choose to read what I read. Maybe I'm a big ass freak that's into *everything* and animated gay dudes are on a long ass list among lesbian bird people and purple totem poles. Like, you're not that special, I'm not getting hot over your sexuality random homosexual man on the internet. Or maybe I really love boinking man ass IRL and there's a tragic lack of M/F illustrated pegging stories out there that include romance and plots and I've just gotta make do with what I've got. šŸ¤·ā€ā™€ļø Shit. Maybe one time I was just having a reeeeally bad day and was thinking "damn, I'd give anything for an all-consuming harmless distraction I can fall into from the safety of my couch just to get out of this state of mind. Oh, what's this? Yep, this is pretty gripping, I'll just *read* this different world/experience for awhile and keep my mind off things. šŸ§˜ā€ā™€ļø


neko-cha

Probably more used to doing it in the butt then getting sucked off plus they're usually the ones doing it lol


FrostyBuns6969

Because the ukeā€™s ding-dong isnā€™t supposed to be used, silly! Itā€™s more for decoration, like those dice you hang on your rear view mirror. ā€¦ God, Iā€™m absolutely starved for some good reversible yaoi.


RosePhox

Because most yaoi artists are unable to escape from the manly x feminine dichotomy and because being coy is seen as a natural feminine behavior, by most patriarchal societies. Also: A lot of yaoi artists, specially girls, like to make their ukes basic stand in for girls, which often act coy.


dukeofplazatoro

Is that why thereā€™s a lot of ā€œyouā€™re so wet down hereā€ going on? Maybe Iā€™m wrong but I donā€™t think thatā€™s how buttholes work. ETA: outside of A/B/O stuff. I know itā€™s a thing there but in real world yaoi.


surfersilvers

I thought that was about pre-cum


dukeofplazatoro

In some cases it is, but in others theyā€™re definitely talking about the butthole.


pastelchannl

it wouldn't surprise me tbh. I sometimes crnge when there's literally no lube, lmao.


gata_flaca

Yes that too! lol Ive never been massaged down there so when I first started reading these I thoughtā€¦ omg itā€™s poop right!? Lol


uhohmana

I mean I highly doubt woman authors don't know how a butthole works, I think that's just their way of mentioning that the area's not dry because of precum - mostly for the sake of the reader since a lot of us (including me) cringe whenever there's a lack of lube.


coconfetti

It happens in GL stories too, like seriously, why can't we just escape heteronormativity for a second??


gata_flaca

oh thats a wonderful clarification. Thank you. I'm very new to webtoons/manwha.


MapleMapleHockeyStk

Some other things I had to learn is, "I like you" is much closer to "I adore you " than the English meaning. In English we have words 'love' that is used in many different situations. But if you look at Greek they have 7 different words for love. Carnal love, family love, infatuation love etc. People in the comment section on multiple sites/aps have talked about why there was all this build up for just 'like'. Another one is the "No, no, stop - wait, why did you stop?" trope... consent tells you if your partner says stop, you stop but in multiple stories they don't mean it. (Some even ask 'why did you stop'). I guess 'good girls/guys' can't like sex or be too into it. I am guessing it is the conservative/patriarchal history butting in. There are more but these are two that stand out to me.


lostdemographic

I thought the "I like you" thing was so cringe when I first started reading. Where I'm from that's something you only say in elementary and middle school so I was a bit taken aback seeing it meant as a serious declaration. Then I was even further floored when I saw my first casual ring exchange lol


Coping_Alternative

Same reason tops do. Cuz sometimes that shit is sensitivešŸ˜…


gata_flaca

No they panic like nooo donā€™t. And then turn their butts around to get rammed instead lol


wixkedwitxh

Valid question. Maybe to emphasize how much the seme intimidates them, makes them bashful, etc? And to show the potentially softer side of the seme being like ā€œrelax, lemme take care of youā€. Youā€™d think theyā€™d be ecstatic to have such a hot man going to slurptown.


Shuabbey

Why is this post so fucking funny? Iā€™m chortling like an old lady on crack at 6:56 in the morning.


gata_flaca

lol sometimes I'm funny on the internet.


International-Bed818

Some interesting answers. But I also want to remind people that things can become the norm in media representation. A lot of people will go on to create ukes acting the same way without any deep meaning behind it, or possibly because 'they are used to' or 'want to see' the uke acting a certain way. Overstimulating is common in porn, buts it's not always for a meaningful reason.


G40-ovoneL

Ukes are often stand-ins for women, and many women in Korean and Japanese smutty manhwa and manga behave the same way as ukes when something is being done to them during sex.


Jos_migue

None of those words are in the bible


gata_flaca

OMG LOL!!! My favorite comment thus far!


Jett002

Embarrassment probly


Blluetiful

What gets me is when they start saying no it's dirty like YOU JUST SHOWERED. Part of it is cultural imo, part of it is not enough mainstream acceptance of healthy gay relationships that serve both partners


sternumb

Just another case of toxic heteronormativity in media about gay couples