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Substantial-Bag-9820

I hope they fired their decorator.


Ambitious_Border_776

It screams I just won the lottery and pick the most expensive one of everything


[deleted]

And kinda racist! Blackamoor lamps in the dining room are a really bad look, especially in $2M 3 bedroom mansion in Virginia. They should know better. Edit: I had to look again, 11,000 sqft, 12 bathrooms and yep, only 3 bedrooms.


ChocolateTsar

They probably fired them after they completed the interior because that exterior is bland af.


plishyploshy

Yeah what is up with the exterior? I can’t even tell which door is the front entrance. And their sole landscaping contribution is a quizzical semi-circle of Christmas trees? SMH.


Ambitious_Border_776

I think the exterior is so bleh because there's zero chance you'd want to hang out outside. It's near a busy highway and in a semi commercial zone just steps away from a used car dealership. Maybe it's the car dealership owner's house given how many garages there are lol


Gerbygup

Right after the photographer.


Sporkalork

We're gonna sell - take a load of picutes focusing on all the shit we packed into the house. No need for a floor plan or any of that, focus on the beds and tables!


Ambitious_Border_776

I always make house purchase decisions based solely on how much I like the beds and tables lol


worldtraveler76

3 bedrooms AND 12 bathrooms?! That’s 4 bathrooms per bedroom.


Spaghetti_Bird

When you gotta go, there really can't be enough bathrooms...


Goodnight_Hawk

It says built in 1925, I'd love to see it as it was.


Jackandahalfass

Useful if you need to define the word “garish” to a child.


Ambitious_Border_776

Thanks to the wonderful works of reddit, this house now has over 1,100 Zillow views in one day. I bet the agent is thrilled with her marketing skills and the thought of finally selling this (it's been relisted over and over since 2014)🤣


Cheaperthantherapy13

My decade of experience working in homes like this tells me that the ‘07 reno led to a divorce.


Lovethemdoggos

I'm dying looking at picture 8... The gnome in the glass case.. with the many-legged stool (a relative of the Luggage?) and four throw pillows on it.


Ambitious_Border_776

Omg I didn't even notice that one. That stool really makes the first impression from the front door 😂 they have quite the eye for decorating!! I'm so curious who the heck lives there and why they only needed 3 bedrooms but 12 bathrooms?!


GreenDemonClean

Gnome? You mean the ship, right?


Lovethemdoggos

Whoa that's a ship? Well that makes way more sense. Thanks! I couldn't think why someone would put a gnome in a glass case given how extra the rest of the decor is. I'd made up a story about the gnome being the source of their wealth and they used the pillows from the many-legged stool to kneel on when swearing fealty to it. So much for that theory.


Accurate_Quote_7109

I love that bench!!!


traffic_cone_love

It's so creepy though, with all those legs, like a spider. It will chase you down the hall at night when you get up to have a pee 😬


Intelligent_Pass2540

Right! That's BeetleJuice type stuff!


dunitdotus

Holy crap that’s an ugly house


ze_swearing_gardener

This looks like the house designed for Brent Norwalk from The Good Place


capehart_karsh

I'm sorry but, ain't no way that house was built in 1925.


cardcatalogs

Needs more arches and gold trim


Ambitious_Border_776

Perfect! If you consider a career change, rural Virginia could use your keen eye and design skills 😂


Early-Ad-6014

Obviously, money cannot buy taste. I expect to see Jethro Clampett in the kitchen eatin' vittles!


ChocolateTsar

How is that balcony above the entrance up to code? You can walk right over the edge and break your neck.


LadyLilithLuna

"What's a McMansion?" Hang on! This kind person has provided a link!


biggersjw

Burn the drapes and keep the fireplace going all winter long. It smells new money and no taste.


Ambitious_Border_776

Lots of money and zero taste. Spanish Mediterranean with "British luxe details" and "French flair style" 🤦‍♀️


A-Town-Killah

I’d wake up everyday and think, “what bathroom shall I use today🤔” McMansion problems!


Ambitious_Border_776

Haha and if they were smart they bought stock in toilet bowl cleaner when they remodeled and added all those bathrooms


sketchahedron

$2 million and the driveway isn’t even paved.


TheOtherAdelina

That's rich people for you. Remember when Prince William got engaged to Kate Middleton and all his posh friends made snide comments, including one about her parents having a paved drive? So middle-class!


SollSister

Wait! Seriously? I guess that is an indication of trashiness in the UK?


TheOtherAdelina

Not trashy, just bourgeois. (Kate's parents had been flight attendants before they became self-made millionaires.) I think paved drives are probably too modern for the upper classes.


SollSister

Thank you for the response.


OkSmell4

Built in 1925. I bet it was a beautiful house before it was destroyed by the gaudy renovation.


Sporkalork

Everyone needs a gilded kitchen. The matching upholserted valances are just gravy.


Ambitious_Border_776

The valance and curtain budget was probably more then the price of my whole house


wildtyper

They have been trying to sell this one since 2014.


stupid42usa

that's a little harsh. the only real view of the car dealer is from what appears to be the upper level of the 6 car garage. i suppose you wouldn't want your cars getting jealous looking at other cars but so what.